by Ally Blue
“What if he was?”
“What if—” Adrian’s bag slipped off his shoulder. He heaved it back up again. “Ryan saw you talking to some guy under a tree the other night. He thought it was me, but it wasn’t. Obviously. It was Harrison, wasn’t it?”
He got a barbed glare in return. Greg set his jaw and walked faster.
The angry silence was answer enough. Adrian sighed. “Dammit, Greg. Why didn’t you tell me about all this before?”
Greg stopped walking and turned around so fast Adrian almost ran into him. “Yeah, that was him at Groome Castle, and it was him your fucking loudmouthed friend saw me with the other night. And he’s found me and talked to me several other times that you never knew about. And I didn’t tell you because I was afraid you would do this if I did.”
Adrian blinked, surprised. “This? What do you mean, ‘this’?”
“This. Interfering. Trying to rescue me.” Greg pointed at him. “I don’t need rescuing.”
Adrian gaped at him. “I didn’t mean—”
“Do I look like a damsel in distress to you?”
“No! I was just—”
“I can handle him, okay? Just stay out of it.”
“Wait, okay, just wait a minute—”
Greg held up a hand. “No. I’m done for tonight. I’m going back to my dorm. Call me when you’re ready to apologize.”
Anger spiked through Adrian’s brain again. “Shit. I’m sorry, okay? But it bothers me that you didn’t trust me enough to tell me he was still stalking you.”
“I just told you why.”
“I know. But I’ve never given you any reason to think I’d treat you like a…what, a damsel in distress? So why would you think that?”
Greg’s mouth curved into a bitter smile. “Does it matter? I was right.”
Adrian had no rebuttal to that. Feeling utterly defeated, he walked the few steps to the closest bench, sank onto it and dropped his bag beside him. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what else to say. I’m sorry.”
“I know.” Greg fiddled with the buckle on his laptop bag. He wouldn’t look at Adrian. “I’m sorry too. Just… Yeah. Okay. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”
Greg walked away without looking back. Adrian sat and watched him go. At least Harrison didn’t seem likely to harass him any more tonight. Which was a good thing, because in spite of what Greg had just said, Adrian had to fight the urge to get up and follow him to make sure he got home okay.
Adrian ran a frustrated hand through his hair. Would he ever be able to get this relationship thing right?
He waited a few minutes, then pushed to his feet and started the trek back to his apartment. His stomach rumbled, and he felt a moment of irrational anger at himself for still being hungry after what had just happened with Greg.
As he passed the neighborhood leading to Groome Castle, he stopped and peered up the empty road. The streetlights shed pools of soft yellow illumination on the pavement at intervals until the road curved out of sight. He couldn’t see it, but he knew that a ten-minute walk would bring him to the old home.
When he veered off his path and onto the sidewalk toward the castle, he told himself he only wanted to look at the outside of the place in the moonlight, that he wouldn’t go inside.
He believed it until he touched the stones of the castle wall and felt the pull of Lyndon’s energy.
Unlocking the front door with a thought, he strode inside and headed straight for the tower. Maybe he and Lyndon could help each other. God knew he could use a friend tonight.
~ * ~
Adrian crouched in the blackness at the rear of the Forest Theatre, watching the vague blur where he knew the stage lay. His heart galloped so fast he thought it might fly straight up his throat and out of his body, but he didn’t move. He had to wait. For what, he wasn’t sure. He only knew he mustn’t move, mustn’t even blink, or he’d miss it.
Hours later—seconds? Minutes? He had no way of knowing—a spotlight switched on. The white light illuminated a single figure which floated weightless in midair, bare feet hanging several inches above the stage, arms spread wide as if secured to an invisible cross. The figure wore old-fashioned black breeches and a white linen shirt, untucked with the laces open. Blood matted the golden brown curls, splattered the pale neck and dripped into the gray eyes. As Adrian watched, a long, ragged wound opened the exposed chest from one side to the other. Blood poured out, more blood than Adrian had ever seen, a bright red waterfall that ran down the man’s legs and pattered onto the stage.
Adrian tried to cry out, tried to run to the stage and sweep Greg into his arms. But he couldn’t move, couldn’t make a sound. Even his tears solidified before they could fall, sealing his eyelids open so he’d never have to look away.
Greg’s gaze locked onto Adrian’s. “I, oh, I can handle it,” Greg sang, each word drawn out over several lilting notes. “You, whoa, oh, you don’t need to rescue me… No, you don’t… You don’t… Oh, whoa, whoa, Adrian…”
Adrian sat straight up in bed, panting. The dream still seemed horrifyingly real. He could even hear the tune Greg had been singing. Though it appeared to have been reduced to a less robust version, without Greg’s voice.
Shit, it’s my phone. Adrian snorted. He was going to kill Chelsea for reprogramming his ringtone to Mariah Carey when he wasn’t looking.
Reaching over to the bedside table, he grabbed his iPhone and checked the display. His stomach clenched when he saw the name. He answered before Greg could change his mind.
“Hi, Greg.” He lay back against the pillows, willing his pulse to slow down. “What’s up?”
Greg let out a humorless laugh. “I’m calling you at four in the morning, Adrian. You don’t have to pretend it’s okay.”
“I’m not pretending. You can always call me if you need me.” Silence. Adrian could hear Greg’s ragged breathing. “Are you all right?”
“Yeah. Well, no, not really. Fuck, I don’t know.”
Greg’s voice sounded rough and thick, as if he’d been crying. Adrian’s brow furrowed. “Greg—”
“Look, I just…I think I just need to explain why I acted like I did earlier. So, I’m gonna do that, and it’ll be easier if you just listen. Is that okay?”
“Of course it is. Anything you need.”
A sharp exhale hit the receiver. “Okay. So, the thing is, when I was with Harrison, I was nothing but a thing to him. That’s still all I am to him. Just something he had and lost and wants back. And then when you started getting in his face…”
Greg trailed off. Adrian bit his tongue and waited.
When Greg started talking again, his voice had gone quiet and sad. “When the two of you were fighting over me, I could’ve walked away, and neither of you would’ve even noticed, because what I thought or felt or wanted didn’t matter right then. Y’all were involved in your pissing contest, and I might as well not have even been there. Do you have any idea what that feels like? It feels like I’m not even a person. And I know you didn’t mean it like that, I know you don’t see me as a possession like Harrison does. It just… For a minute there, it felt that way. And I’d promised myself I’d never let that happen again, and…well. I know I acted like an ass, and I’m sorry. I guess I just freaked out a little. And I don’t know if any of this is even making any sense to you, but I had to at least try to explain.”
It all makes sense now. Jesus. No wonder he was pissed. Adrian’s stomach rolled. He’d always despised men who treated their partners like property. It made him sick to realize he’d turned into one of those men, however briefly or unintentionally.
Adrian rubbed his free hand over his forehead. “I’m glad you did. It makes perfect sense, and I don’t blame you for being upset. I’m so sorry.”
Soft laughter floated through the receiver. “I’m just glad you’re not too pissed off at me. Most guys aren’t as willing to listen as you are.”
“Hell, I’m glad you’re not too pissed off at me.” Adrian tuck
ed a hand behind his head. “Besides, you’re worth holding onto. What we’ve got going here is worth holding onto. Of course I’m going to listen to what you have to say. Especially when I clearly screwed up.”
The hitch of breath on the other end of the line tugged at Adrian’s heart. “Thank you,” Greg whispered. “You know what, I think I’m a lucky guy.”
The line went dead before Adrian could answer. He set the phone down and smiled. “So am I.”
Chapter Eleven
“Happy Thanksgiving, sweetheart! We miss you!”
Adrian smiled at his mother’s image on his laptop screen, his whole family crowded around and behind her at the dining room table in the big, rambling house on Mobile Bay where his mother and her husband, Lee, lived. His heart ached to see them all together without him, but there was no help for it. Dr. Perez had offered him a coveted spot as an assistant on an ongoing research project for the physics department, which required him to stay on campus over at least one holiday through the remainder of the school year. He’d chosen Thanksgiving and Easter. The opportunity was too good to turn down, no matter how difficult it was to be away from his family right now.
“I miss you guys too.” Adrian snagged a cookie from the tin on the table and held it up. “Thanks for the pumpkin cookies, by the way. They’re great.”
“You’re welcome.” His mother turned to grin at his father, who sat in a chair he’d pulled up just behind her right shoulder. “Your dad made them, of course. You know I can’t bake.”
“I helped,” Sean interjected from his spot leaning on the back of his mother’s chair.
“Yes, Sean, and you did a great job.” Adrian’s father patted Sean’s arm, the dark eyes so like Adrian’s own shining in amusement. “So, Adrian. What are your plans for Thanksgiving dinner? And please don’t tell me anything about a sandwich alone in front of your computer while working, because I have no desire to nurse your mother through a stroke today.”
Adrian laughed. His dad knew him far too well. Probably because Dr. Bo Broussard was a scientist himself and therefore knew the lure of a compelling project. Sam had had to pull him away from more than one of them during Adrian’s teen years.
“Actually, I’m heading over to Dr. Perez’s house in a couple of hours.” Adrian nibbled the edge of the cookie he still held. “He invited all his research assistants over for Thanksgiving dinner with him and his wife.”
Beside Adrian’s father, Sam smiled, the corners of his eyes crinkling. “Well, good. That was nice of them to invite y’all over.”
“Yeah, it was. I’m looking forward to it.”
For more reasons than a good meal. Greg was spending the holiday with his family a couple of hours down the road in Goldsboro, and Adrian was surprised by how much he missed him. Even the considerable work of the research project hadn’t kept Adrian busy enough to drown out the ache of loneliness. His smile slipped a fraction.
His mom’s brows drew together in a worried frown. “Honey, are you okay?”
To her left, Lee shook his head. “Sweetheart, don’t hound the boy. Of course it’s difficult for him to be away from home, but I’m sure he’s managing fine.”
Sean flashed an evil grin. “He misses his boyfriend.”
Instantly, Adrian’s face went beet red. It had become a Pavlovian response lately to his brother’s teasing. He dropped his head into his hands. “Shut up, creep.”
Sean snickered. Their father gave him a stern look. “Sean, please.”
He didn’t have to say anything else. Sean’s expression softened. Leaning closer to the screen, he lowered his voice to a whisper. “Sorry, bro. You know I love you.”
Adrian’s throat went tight. He grinned. “Yeah, I know. I love you too. Hey, what about that girl you’ve been seeing lately? Maia? How’s that going?”
A wide, goofy smile spread over Sean’s face. His eyes shone in that particular way they always did when he talked about the young woman he’d been seeing for the past few weeks. “It’s going great. She is soooo fantastic.”
Everyone at the table laughed. Sean just shrugged and joined in.
For a second, a familiar jealousy clawed at Adrian’s insides. He squashed it before it could take root and grow. During their childhood and teen years, Adrian had spent a lot of time consumed with resentment over his brother’s ability to shake off both friendly ribbing and real ridicule and laugh at himself. They were adults now. It was about time Adrian accepted his own sensitive nature and stopped envying Sean’s more easygoing one.
Adrian forced a chuckle. “That’s great. I hope I’ll get to meet her one day.”
Excitement lit Sean’s face. “You will! Unless you don’t come home for Christmas either.”
Adrian’s mouth fell open. “She’s coming home with you for Christmas?”
“Yeah, isn’t it great? Mom said I could invite her, and her family was totally cool with it.” In the background, the oven beeped. Sean glanced at it. “That’s dinner. I’ll get it, Mom.” He favored Adrian with a beaming smile. “Talk to you later, bro. Love you.”
“Love you too. Bye.”
Sean dashed out of frame. Their mother shook her head, chuckling. “My God, that girl’s got him wrapped around her little finger.”
“Does not!” Sean protested off screen.
Lee arched an eyebrow. “I’ll go help Sean. It’s good to talk to you, Adrian. Take care of yourself.”
“You too, Lee. Talk to you later.” Adrian waved at him.
Pushing back his chair, Lee rose to his feet and went to join Sean in the kitchen.
Adrian’s mom planted an elbow on the dining room table in front of her and rested her chin in her hand. “Speaking of Christmas, honey, when are you coming home? And where are you planning to stay, here or your dad’s? I don’t want to rush you or anything, and there’s certainly no pressure, since we’re all planning to spend plenty of time together, I was just curious.”
Behind her, Adrian’s father leaned sideways to whisper something into Sam’s ear. Sam nodded in response, and Adrian thought he heard “I don’t know why not” or something like that.
“Um, I don’t know yet,” Adrian answered when his mother frowned. “I mean, classes end on the tenth, but beyond that I’m not sure. It kind of depends on where we are on Dr. Perez’s project. I don’t have to stay over Christmas, but I might need to hang around just for a day or two to catch up on reports before I go.”
And why didn’t you invite my boyfriend to stay? We’ve been dating longer than Sean and Maia. Adrian bit his tongue to keep himself from asking out loud. He was surprised, not only by his mother’s discrimination—which he had to admit had probably been subconscious on her part, considering her lack of visible guilt—but by how much it stung.
“Oh, okay.” She nodded. “Well, just let me know when—”
“Mom!” Sean interrupted from the kitchen. “Where’s the cranberry sauce?”
She sighed. “In the fridge.”
“I don’t see it.”
“Second shelf, behind that heart-healthy margarine.”
A silent moment passed. Sam hid a wide grin behind his hand, as if he knew what was coming. Sure enough, after a couple of seconds, Lee called out, “It’s not there, honey.”
“Lord, help. I love them dearly, but those two should not be allowed in the kitchen.” Shaking her head, Adrian’s mother smiled at him. “I’ll talk to you soon, sweetheart. I love you.”
“Love you too, Mom. Bye.”
She blew him a kiss, stood and hurried to help her husband and youngest son sort out dinner. Adrian’s dad exchanged a look with his husband, then scooted his chair closer to the table where their laptop sat. “Adrian, Sam and I were wondering if you’d like to invite Greg to spend Christmas here in Mobile with you.”
Adrian stared at the both of them, wondering if they’d learned to read minds. “What?”
“Only if you want to, of course.” Sam leaned forward, his expression open and earnest.
“Look, I know it embarrasses you to talk about this relationship, so I’m not going to make a big deal out of it. But it’s pretty obvious that being with him makes you happy, and even though Sean shouldn’t have teased you I think what he said was accurate. You miss Greg right now. Which is only normal.”
“Anyone who’s important to you is important to us as well,” his father added. “Greg is welcome in our home any time, and we’d love to have him here for Christmas if you want to invite him.”
To Adrian’s horror, the backs of his eyelids prickled. He forced the impending tears away by sheer willpower. “I’d really like that. I don’t know how he’ll feel about being away from his family, but I’ll definitely ask.” Watching his father and Sam on screen, he felt a wash of gratitude for these two men who had loved and supported him through his torturous teenage years and helped him emerge on the other side sane and whole. “Thank you both. For everything.”
His father studied his face with the patented Dad Look that seemed to see straight through flesh, bone and pretensions to Adrian’s core. “Your mother loves you, Adrian. Every bit as much as she loves Sean. She didn’t intend to leave you out.”
Adrian nodded in agreement, even as the still-bitter child inside him screamed about the injustice of it all. This wasn’t the time or place to complain about excusing unintentional discrimination. His dad and Sam understood that issue far better than he ever could anyway. Besides, he knew his mom. She’d changed since the old days. The second she realized what she’d done, she’d be overcome with remorse, and a new champion in the fight against subconscious homophobia would be born.
Which might or might not be such a good thing. Being a pragmatic woman, Adrian’s mother rarely got caught up in causes, but when she did she was relentless to the point of maddening.
Adrian’s dad glanced toward the kitchen. “I guess we’d better sign off now, they’re bringing the food in. But either Sam or I will be on the chat anytime we’re online, and we pretty much have our phones on all the time, so call us whenever you want to talk, okay?”