by Mz. Toni
“Have you talked to Cherish?”
“Naw, I been calling and she ignoring me, the shit is childish and she showing her age.”
“Get the fuck out my house!” Camille screamed.
“Cam, chill the fuck out, don't be kicking my people out!” Mark snapped.
“Fuck both of y'all. I ain't gonna sit here while he bad mouth my fucking friend in my house, y'all can take that shit elsewhere.”
“Man you tripping,” I said shaking my head.
“I'm tripping, nigga you believed some thirsty ass bitch over ya own fucking child and woman, and I'm tripping, boy bye!”
“I ain't believe nobody over them, I was trying to call and find out what happened and she won't answer.”
“It doesn't matter Jason, you being so fucking stupid right now. How did Cherish know that Jas was with that bitch? Obviously something happened, but you were too busy up Jayda’s ass to find out the real deal.”
“Aight so what happen since you know everything!”
“Oh, fuck you, I ain't telling you shit cuz you don't deserve to know shit. Now either you get out my house or you and Mark asses gotta go!”
“How the fuck you gonna threaten to kick me out my own shit that I pay the bills at, you done lost ya mind!”
“I ain't tryna get you in no shit, so imma head out,” I said dapping Mark up and heading out. Picking up my phone, I called Cherish only to be met by her voicemail yet again. She had me on block and that shit was pissing me off. I was missing the shit out of Jasmine and if Cherish was going to continue to play these petty childish games, then I would have to take shit into my own hands. Pulling up to Cherish’s school, I parked and walked in to get my baby girl. When she came down to the office she was all smiles until she noticed that it was me who was picking her up, her smile turned into frown.
“Hey baby girl,” I said hugging her.
“Daddy, why you picking me up and not Cherish?”
“I missed you, and it’s time for you to go home,” I said. When she got into the car, it was awkward as hell. She wouldn't talk to me at all and whenever I tried to spark up conversation, she shot that shit down. Pulling up to my house, as soon as I parked, she hopped out the car and slammed my car door. I didn't know what her problem was, but I was ready to beat her ass.
“Jasmine, get your ass down here!” I screamed up the stairs.
“Yes?”
“What the hell is wrong with you?”
“I don't want to be here with you, I want my mom.”
“Since when you don't want to be here?”
“Since now, I wanna live with Cherish!” she screamed.
“Lower ya voice Jasmine!”
“Can you please call my mom?” she asked with tears building up in her eyes. To see her so angry with me hurt, especially because I didn't know what I did wrong.
“Why you crying?” I asked before hugging her tightly.
“You believed that girl over me,” she said.
“I didn't believe anyone over you, y'all left before I could get y'all side.”
“She cussed at me, called me bad names and was mean to me.”
“She what!”
“She wouldn't let me call you and she said she gonna be my new mommy. If she is, I want to go live with Cherish.”
“She really said those things to you?” I asked only to have her nod her head at me.
“Mommy Cherish was crying because you didn't even try and chase after her, she say you love Jayda.”
“How you know all this Jas?”
“I be listening when she talks to Auntie Cam, plus I know when mommy's not happy or she sad.”
“Imma make this shit right!” I said before hopping in the car to drop Jas off at Mama Betty’s house for a little while. It fucked me up that as soon as I picked her up after not seeing her for days, here I was dropping her off yet again, but I needed to handle this shit right now. Grabbing my phone, I called Jayda and waited for her to answer.
“Hey Jason,” she answered.
“Hey, I need to talk to you,” I said trying to stay calm.
“Aight, where are you?”
“I'm parked across the street from your building.”
“Ok, here I come, but is everything ok?”
“Yeah, just come down,” I said before hanging up. When she walked out the building and into my car, I could feel my blood boiling.
“Yo, I just talked to my daughter,” I said before pausing.
“Oh, so what, she lied on me again?”
“Stop fucking playing games Jayda, the shit you said to my child is unacceptable!” I snapped.
“I didn't say anything outrageous to your daughter.”
“So you weren't cursing at her?”
“Oh God, no!”
“You didn't tell her you were gonna be her new mother?”
“Jason, I love you so much, why can't we be together and raise your daughter?”
“Because she has a mother Jayda, I thought you understood what this was. I don't have those kinds of feelings for you.”
“That’s a lie. I know you love me, maybe not as much as I love you, but that will change,” she said reaching over to kiss me. Pulling my head back, I looked at her, and for the first time since meeting her, I realized that she was a little throwed.
“Jayda, listen to me, I don't love you and never have. I wanted to keep you as an employee, but after all this shit, I gotta let you go,” I said.
“Wait, so you firing me?”
“I don't need Jasmine seeing you in the office after what you did to her, and when I get Cherish back, you were gonna have to go anyways, so might as well end this shit now.”
“No no no Jason, I need this money!”
“I will write you an awesome recommendation letter and I'm sure you will find a job in no time.”
“But me and you are destined Jason.”
“Come on now, get out my car!”
“I'm not leaving until you tell me the truth. I know you love me so why are you doing this!” she said as tears poured from her eyes. She had snot dripping down her face; ole girl was a hot fucking crazy mess. Getting out my car, I opened the passenger's side door and tried to pull her out, the crazy bitch had her seatbelt on. Grabbing my gun from my waist, I cocked it back and put it to the side of her head.
“I ain't even bout this life right here, but I need you to get the fuck out my car,” I said through gritted teeth. She wasted no time hopping out my shit, but why did I have to threaten to kill her for her to do it, the bitch was crazy. Grabbing my phone, I called Jas to let her know I was on my way, only to have her tell me that Cherish picked her up.
“Yo give ya mama the phone Jas!”
“Ok, hold on.”
“Yes, Mega.”
“I'm not gonna be playing these fucking games with you, if you done be done, but that’s my fucking child and you not gonna keep her from me!” I snapped.
“You're right, I will drop her off at Mama Betty and you do the same. She has a phone so she can call us herself when she’s ready to get picked up,” she said. I couldn't believe the shit that was coming out her mouth, did we really get to the point where we needed a middle person when it came to handling our child. I was beyond pissed and refused to even entertain the conversation, so instead of saying what I felt, I hung up.
Chapter Nineteen
(Cherish)
That nigga got life fucked up if he thought I was gonna just let this shit go, he knew better than to have that bitch watching our child. I don't give a fuck how important that meeting was, nothing is more important than our child and her well-being. The thing that really sent me over the edge was when the bitch said that I wasn't Jayda’s real mom, how would she know that unless he told her, and then he didn't even defend me when she said it. I had been keeping Jasmine with me, and not because I was forcing her, but because she didn't want to go with his ass. Numerous times, I tried to take her to him and she would cry. I refused to force that
girl to go somewhere she didn't want to go. When I went to pick her up and was told that her father got her early, I wasn't even mad because at the end of the day, that’s his child and he loves her so I knew he wouldn't let the shit go for but so long. But when she called me to come get her because he dropped her off at Mama Betty’s, to say I was pissed was an understatement. Why the fuck would you go through the trouble of getting her, only to have someone else watch her. When he told Jas to give me the phone, I had the biggest attitude, but when he let me have it, I was actually turned on. Things have been going great with me and it seems like the better I get mentally, the more I miss Jason and what we shared. I had been ignoring him for days and I haven't seen him in weeks, we been doing the drop off plan I suggested and I would be gone before he even got there and vice versa. Today, I had a therapy session and I was dreading it because today I had to role-play and tell everyone that hurt me exactly how I felt. Doc said it was a way to move on and forgive. Walking into her office, the first thing she did when she saw me was give me a pen and paper to write down every person who has been haunting me in my dreams. Giving her the paper, I sat on the couch and prepared myself for this emotional session.
“Ok Cherish, I am Desiree Daniels, your mother, tell me what you want me to know.”
“No this is weird,” I said.
“Cherish, you ain't shit, never was, never will be which is why I had your stepdad do all those horrible things to you.”
“I loved you mommy, even when you hurt me, even when you made me feel worthless, I loved you so much. I thought you were the most beautiful woman in the world and all I wanted was to make you proud. Why couldn't you love me back, why couldn't you be a normal mom? Normal mom’s don't burn their children with cigarettes, normal mom’s don't try and kill their child, let their man rape their child, normal mom’s don't hate their child, I guess I want to know why? Why were these men more important to you than I was, why didn't you feel like I deserved your love!” I screamed. I must have blacked out because when I opened my eyes, I was sitting on the floor in between the doctor’s legs while she rubbed my hair and apologized for causing me pain.
“Cherish, now I want you to tell her all that you’ve accomplished.”
“I finished high school a year early, I met the love of my life and I'm pregnant with two beautiful babies. I have friends and family who love me, really love me. I spend Thanksgiving and Christmas with them. It took me a long time to get what I needed and I always thought the love would come from you, that one day you would realize how wrong you were, but that day never came and I'm ok with that because I have people in my life that make up for all the hurt and pain you caused. I guess what I wanna say to everyone that hurt me, my mom, Caesar, Meeka, and Tyree, you guys tried to hurt me, bring me down but none of it worked, I'm still here kicking and swinging and I’m not going out without a fight,” I said with a smile as tears flowed down my face.
“How do you feel?” she asked.
“Honestly, I feel like a million pounds have been lifted off my chest,” I said. When the session was over, I headed over to Mama Betty’s house to pick Jas up. Walking up to the house, I was pissed off to see Mega’s ass sitting on the porch as if he were waiting for me to show up.
“Jason, not right now,” I said trying to get past him.
“No, we need to talk now!”
“We ain't got shit to talk about!”
“Sit ya stubborn ass down and shut up!” he said. Rolling my eyes at him, I sat down and waited for him to speak his mind.
“I fucked up. I couldn't see how crazy Jayda was and for that, I'm sorry. I didn't want to believe Jayda’s side of the story, but you weren't answering my calls, so that was the only side I knew. She no longer works for me, as soon as Jas told me what happened, I brought her here and went to confront and fire Jayda,” he said. Now I understood why he just dropped her off.
“So what do you want from me?” I asked.
”I want you, I want my family back, but I know you're working on getting better and I respect that, so for now, I just want my friend back,” he said causing me to get teary eyed.
“We can do that,” I said with a smile.
“Alright, so set up that appointment so we can find out what we having,” he said hugging me. I would be lying if I said being in his arms didn't feel like home. I missed this man so much sometimes my heart hurts, but getting better had to come before all this shit.
“I already set it up for tomorrow, I was actually gonna have Mama Betty tell you to meet me there.”
“Aight bet, text me the time and all that good shit and I will be there,” he said happily. When we finally left each other, I felt really good. Between my therapy session, and making shit semi right with Mega, I was on cloud nine. Grabbing Jasmine, we went home. I cooked dinner and we had a long talk about me and her father’s relationship. I had to let her know that just because I was mad at him, didn't mean she had to be. I appreciated her loyalty to me, but at the end of the day, Jason was an awesome father and she needed to know that. Once Jas was sleep, I called Peter, the realtor I had met. We don't talk everyday because I don't want to give off mixed signals. I already explained to him that I had a lot going on and wasn't really looking for anything, but you know how men can be, so I didn't want to call or text him too much.
“Hey beautiful,” he said when he answered.
“Hey Peter, how are you?”
“I'm good, been waiting for you to call me again, I enjoyed our last conversation.”
“So did I, but between doctor appointments and everything else, I don't really have time for much else.”
“I understand, and trust me I'm not angry, I'm willing to take what I can get.”
“Thank you for being so understanding.”
“I just wish you would go out with me, on just one date.”
“I don't have time for dates, I'm pregnant.”
“I don't need all your time, just a few hours. And I already know you're pregnant and I don't care about that.”
“Aight, I’ll go on one date,” I said with a smile.
“Oh snap she said yes!” he said excitedly, causing me to laugh.
“Alright, well I’ll text you or call tomorrow so we can plan something,” I said before hanging up.
The next morning I was up bright and early to get ready for my appointment, I was excited to know what we were having. I was almost seven months, so this was long overdue. After getting showered, dressed and ready, I dropped Jasmine off at school and headed to my doctor's appointment. When I walked into the office, I was surprised to see that Mega was already there with a big smile on his handsome face.
“Hey lil mama,” he greeted me.
“Hey baby daddy,” I said laughing.
“Stop playing me with Cherish,” he said with a smirk.
“Ms. Daniels,” the nurse called.
“Right here,” I said walking up to the desk with Mega on my heels.
“The doctor will see you now, you can head on back,” she said. Sitting down on the table, I laid back excited and ready.
“I'm so glad you're here Jason.”
“So am I,” he said grabbing my hand and holding it tight.
“Hello Ms. Daniels, how are you feeling?”
“Hey doc. I feel ok most days, but I'm always tired.”
“Yeah, that's what happens when you carry twins, they start to take a toll on your body.”
“Well I'm glad it’s almost over,” I said with a laugh.
“Ok well let’s see what we have here,” he said lifting my shirt and placing the cold gel on my belly.” As he moved the machine around my belly, I was a little nervous at how long it was taking.
“Is everything ok?” Mega asked.
“Oh yeah, here they are. So are you guys ready to find out what you're having?” he said with a smile.
“Hell yeah!” Mega screamed.
“Well Baby A is a beautiful baby…”
“Spit it out!”
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“Baby boy,” the doctor said laughing. I couldn't hold my tears back, and neither could Jason.
“So I'm having a mini me,” Jason said wiping his face.
“Yes, you are. Baby B looks to be a baby girl.”
“A girl,” I said in disbelief. Don't get me wrong, I was happy to be having healthy babies, but deep down I really didn't want a girl.
“You don't seem excited,” the doctor said.
“Can you give us a minute?” Jason asked the doctor.