by Kara L. M.
“Austin.” I yelled in fear as he easily scaled another twenty feet. “I have just started.” He turned around and winked at me. “Not funny whatever you are this isn’t the right way to show me!” He ignored me and effortlessly climbed. Every time his foot would slip off a rock I would gasp and wait for him to fall. But each time he would reach a little higher and secure his body to the wall. This was the most terrifying acrobatic show I had ever watched. I felt big tears building in my eyes as he was close to the top of the fall.
The river was flowing powerfully and I knew he could never wade past it. He spread his arms out and flipped around and fell. My stomach dropped with his body as I lost all feeling in my legs. His ten foot fall was halted by his arms grabbing a slippery boulder. Once his fingers started to slide he let it and I am pretty sure he was smiling at me as the tears were flowing from my eyes. Was this his goodbye smile? How could he be smiling? He twisted his body around and grabbed a boulder again and slid over and over. After 30 feet of almost falling his descent looked more like a horrifying dance. As he approached the ground I was relieved. He wasn’t going to die. Maybe broken bones but he was grabbing enough rocks on the way down to slow him. Once he was five feet from the bottom he reached to the side and put his arms out, did a back flip and landed on a flatter boulder that wasn’t in the water. My jaw dropped and my body was shaking from the shock.
He was clearly not human. As much as I was relieved by the fact that I didn’t watch him fall to his death I was suddenly furious for what he put me through. I stood up with tears flowing furiously from my eyes and flipped around to run down the trail. I didn’t want to be here, see that stupid waterfall ever again or see him. There were a million ways he could have showed me who he was but this was too much. I struggled to keep my feet solid to the ground as the gravel started to slip beneath my shoes. I desperately reached for a branch to steady me but then it snapped and I tumbled to ground. The force of the fall had pushed my body sliding towards a cliff. Oh no, what had I done?
I screamed as I sped to my death. Why was I in such a hurry to go down this steep trail? I dug my fingernails into the hard ground and nothing would catch. Even in my debilitating fear the electric fog memories flooded back and all I could think of was his face and his touch and how it led me to this point. I closed my eyes as my feet were going over the cliff. I was heading to my doom but I could focus on our last kiss and the beautiful power that had filled my heart. Tears left my eyes. At least my death would be quick. Suddenly hands grasped mine just as half my body fell over the edge. I breathed a sigh of relief. It wasn’t over. His strong arms pulled me close. The electricity was pulsing through my body again. I was alive, and not just in the human sense but in every sense. My soul couldn't deny the intense connection we had, as odd and twisted as it may have seemed just five minutes ago.
Austin led me back to the trail where I fell into his arms sobbing. The last ten minutes were the most traumatizing of my life. “I’m so sorry Liv, I am so, so sorry.” He kept kissing my head and holding me close. Once my arms and legs stopped shaking he released me from his embrace and examined my scraped legs and hands. There were large gashes sliced into the back of my calves. The gravel dust was doing a fantastic job masking the blood. I was grateful the wounds were out of sight because if I had to stare at them any longer I would have passed out. “Hold on.” He said as he studied my battle wounds. He pulled out his water bottle and started to douse my legs to clean off all the dirt clinging to my cuts. “Ouch!” I screamed as I felt the miniature rocks tearing at my wound as they fell to the ground. “Sorry, we need to get you down the mountain and get you properly cleaned.” I attempted one step and the sting from my injury burned up my legs, my hands were also on fire from the scrapes. “Oh no you don’t.” He said as he lifted me up and ever so gently laid me over his shoulders like a fireman. I would have protested but my body was exhausted now that the adrenaline was wearing off. I stared at his muscles through his tight shirt as each one was flexed under my weight. I focused on the electricity warming my heart and it luckily masked the burn of my legs and hands.
I was surprised when we reached the parking lot. I had become a pro at letting the electric fog numb my brain. He set me in the jeep and he pulled out a first aid kit from under the seat. I stared at my legs knowing he couldn't do much to salvage the skin, maybe some ointment and a band aid. I was certain an insta-care appointment would have to deep clean my wounds today. I was nauseous at the thought. He opened up the alcohol swabs and I yelped.
“Wait, kiss me?” I begged. He glanced at me with confusion until his thoughts connected. “Of course.” He grabbed my face and brought his lips to mine. The electric fog was like a painkiller, taking my thoughts of bodily pain far from my mind. I pulled away. “Okay now.” The stinging was over and I turned my head as I felt him work through my wound cleaning. That kiss must have done the trick because I only felt a few light tugs here and there as he worked the tweezers down my leg. Once he was done I was afraid to look. I knew the gravel dust was hiding the depth of the cut but if it was cleaner I would see more than I wanted to.
“Your wounds are perfectly clean, let me bandage them up and they will be scabbed over by the morning.” He said proudly. I hesitantly peeked out of the corner of my eye and noticed my cuts were clean. Maybe an insta-care wasn’t in my future. I felt relief wash over me. “I can’t even say how sorry I am that our day ended this way and sorry that you won’t be making it home on time.” I slid my phone out of my backpack and noticed it was 5 p.m. Mom was going to kill me as evidence from the missed calls and texts. He hopped in the driver’s seat but before he started the car his eyes held mine with concern.
“You know now that I am not human, you almost lost your life because I wanted to show off to you, I care about you but not sure if that is enough to change your mind about me.” He softly lifted my hand that was bandaged. The electricity from his touch seemed to soothe the aching. I stared at our hands. I felt our connection and I cared about him, but he was right I wasn’t sure if I was ready for this.
“I need to know more, I mean you terrified me, but I can’t deny what I feel for you:” I said quietly. “There will be another day, but for now you should rest, you need those hands for math.” He gave me a sarcastic grin. “Uh.” Is all I could get out as we drove down the canyon.
I couldn't stop playing the waterfall scene and slide to my death over and over in my head. It was all I could think about on the way home and again later that night when I attempted to sleep. It wasn’t easy explaining to my Mom that I slipped hiking with Austin. She wasn’t happy to see my bandages or that I had ditched family time. I knew this was the opposite of how I wanted her to see him. But she didn’t even know the half of what Austin was like or is for that matter. When I finally fell asleep my body gave in to a long slumber
I noticed I had slept in past breakfast when I could hear my brother’s friends shouting at the TV while they played Xbox downstairs. I checked my phone, Noon, I better get up, but I didn’t want to. My aches were gone and any movement might stir the pain from its slumber and then the stabbing stinging would come back. I shuttered at the thought. Hunger finally won and I gingerly rose from my bed. I decided to keep my pink pajamas on to lessen the chance of changing into something that would tug on my bandages. I switched my shirt with just my fingers which was challenging. Once I made it to the kitchen I poured myself a bowl of cereal and plopped down on the chair. The stinging was still present but not near as bad as the night before. I checked my phone and noticed a text from Austin.
“Good morning gorgeous, I hope your feel much better today. If you want to see me, let me know.”
My Mom was calling my phone and I answered. “Liv, we need to talk.” I knew what this was about. “I am fine Mom, honestly just a bit sore but I am fine.” “I am glad you’re doing better but honestly we both know that is not why I am calling”. A pit turned in my stomach. She didn't want me around Austin. I knew it but I h
ad been in denial since she first got mad at me the night he brought me home late. “Mom it wasn’t his fault.” Well it kind of was but she didn’t need to know that. “You know how much of klutz I am!” I tried to laugh but it sounded bogus. “Liv he doesn't seem like a good influence, bringing you home late, taking you on dangerous hiking trips when you should be spending time with your brother and me.” “The late thing was my fault and the hiking well I just need to be more careful.” She was quiet for a second. “Liv I think it would be best if you didn’t see Austin again”. My blood started boiling within me. She may be right. I honestly hadn’t decided how much further Austin and I would go. But it wasn’t her decision. “Well Mom you don’t know him and I can choose who I like or don’t like.” “Be smart Liv that is all I ask. It’s your life but just remember who you are.” She said softly. I hung up the phone. I decided to text Samantha about my fall. She would no doubt want to go running tonight but I wasn’t in the mood.
I wanted to see Austin today but I also didn’t. I craved his electric touch, his smell and those lips. But I was honestly afraid it would make yesterdays memories all too real. The longer we stayed apart the more I could pretend yesterday was a bad nightmare. Later in the evening I decided I wanted to be Austin free for a bit longer. I had to muster will power not to text him but I knew I needed more time to ponder our situation. I decided to stay in since my body felt wrecked. I went to my room with some popcorn and put in my favorite old chick flick movie “My Fair Lady.” I basked in the music and let the happy tunes carry me away from my reality. A knock at the door startled me out of my dream world. “Liv it’s for you.” I heard Peter yell. Who would be here at 9:30 p.m.? Is it bad that I hoped it wasn’t Austin? I wasn’t ready to relive those memories.
I was relieved when I turned down the stairs and saw Zeke. It was a funny feeling to have after our last conversation. He had a box of junior mints in his hand. “Hey Liv, I heard from Samantha that you fell hiking.” “Yes.” I pointed to my bandaged hands. “You know how accident prone I am.” I joked. “Well I hear chocolate can fix anything.” He smiled. Peter was bored of the conversation and ran back to his Xbox. “You want to chill on the porch?” He asked. “Of course.” We went out and the night breeze made me shiver a bit.
“Actually let’s sit on the grass.” He pointed to the side hill next to my house. “Cement is kind of rough”. I nodded. Once I got comfortable he opened the box of junior mints and passed them to me. “Liv I am sorry I have been so weird. I like you and to see you move on from me that fast, well that has never happened to me before. Truthfully I have never met a girl like you either.” His sincere feelings made me feel horrible about how I handled things but also made me feel hopeful to keep Zeke in my life. Hearing this was just what I needed. It was ok for me to be terrified of Austin and it was ok for me to want someone normal in my life like Zeke. I started to shed tears and he suddenly looked worried.
“Oh Liv I am sorry if you like that Austin guy I just wanted to clear things up since I want to be friends.” I stared up at him and gave him a kiss on his cheek. “Thank you, yesterday was the scariest day of my life, you have no idea how bad I needed to hear that.” His face was confused and worried. “Liv what happened? Did he hurt you?” I shook my head “No, but my fall was a bit more serious than my Mom knows, I was actually sliding towards a cliff and Austin saved me right before falling over”. His mouth fell open and without asking he wrapped his arms around me. I let him. There was no electric shock but there was also no danger. It felt nice to tell someone, as a weight was lifted off my shoulders. I started bawling. “It’s ok Liv, I am so glad you’re ok”. He breathed into my ear.
He didn’t realize I wasn’t only crying about the near death experience. It was about everything with Austin, I was sure I was falling for him, but what does that mean if he isn’t completely human? What does it mean if I am scared of him? What does it mean if I don't know if I can get over how badly he scared me when I thought I was losing him? Was falling for Austin making me lose myself in the process? Watching him climb and fall was like the peach yogurt experience, too powerful, and not in a delicious way like the yogurt. It was a feeling I would never want to feel again. Our connection made me feel like a drug addict. High highs but low lows. But here I was crying and being consoled by the least likely candidate. I pulled it together and wiped away my last tears.
“Thanks Zeke it feels so good to tell someone. Please don't tell anyone.” I begged.
“Of course, I want to be your friend Liv, think of me as one. You can tell me anything and I’m just a text away.” He said thoughtfully. I nodded.
“Please take my mind of this, tell me about your summer plans.” I asked.
He went on to talk about how he planned to go boating with his family. And just like that I was back in the normal world with a normal boy. The feeling was comforting but I no longer felt alive, but I was alive and safe here with him.
Chapter 9: Electric absence
The next day my Mom drove me to school. She seemed to be relieved that Austin didn’t automatically show up. My wounds had healed miraculously quick and sliding on my jeans before we left didn’t hurt at all. “Six more weeks!” She said excitedly. “Mmhm.” I responded. To her it meant six weeks until you’re out of the clear with all the bad boys. I was still indifferent about the whole situation. I cared about Austin, but part of me couldn’t shake the horrible feelings from the other day. I knew I would have to brave them eventually. His face would force the memories back. Being away from him for a day helped clear the fog from my head. That was a good thing and a bad thing.
I stepped into the portable and he wasn’t there. Class started and he never showed up. I started to feel anxious staring at the door. I didn’t know what I wanted with him and me but I did know I needed to know more before I could make up my mind. My mom picked me up once class was over and her good mood was still intact.
The rest of the day went by slow as I did my homework alone. I couldn’t take it any longer. I snatched my phone from my purse and sent him a text. “Hey you weren’t in class”. Several hours later there was no response. To avoid going crazy I invited Katie over for a sleepover. She seemed surprised that I was Austin free.
“So where is lover boy anyways? Didn’t you guys hang out all last week and this weekend?”
“Yes and honestly it has been incredible, but.”
“But what? Is it the summer school thing?”
“No! But I wish it was that easy.”
“Liv you can tell me anything what is it?”
I knew I could not tell my best friend anything. Austin’s secret wasn’t mine to tell.
“He is a bit of a bad boy.” I partially lied.
“Oh well I am not surprised. So is that it? Are you going to see Zeke now?”
“That is not it, I still like Austin but we need to talk it out and decide if we can make it work. But he wasn’t at school today and he hasn’t answered my texts.”
“That is weird. I am sorry that sucks, I know you like him. But maybe it’s a sign. If he thinks you are a prude good girl maybe he is backing off.”
“Maybe, he once said he liked that I was a good girl. But maybe you’re right.”
Talking to Katie should have made me feel better but now I felt worse. Not only was Austin MIA after our crazy day together but now Katie was making me second guess if he was starting to realize he didn’t want me anyways. We decided to watch Chitty Chitty Bang Bang to take my mind of the situation.
That night I had the weirdest dream ever. It was me and Austin walking through a field holding hands feeling charged and happy but the dream ended with me falling off the cliff and not being saved. Was that a warning from my subconscious?
The next day I was honestly concerned about Austin. I had been so consumed with my own feelings and how I was struggling I neglected to think of what he was going through. I decided to ride my bike over to his house. His Jeep was gone. I left a can of coke with note
on his porch. “Call me, Liv”. Hopefully he would see I came by.
The dreams came again but this time when I was falling off the cliff I started to float through space and Austin was floating with me. He reached out. “Take my hand Liv and this will all be over.” I did and the electric charge pulsed through my veins. When I woke up my body felt alive as if we had touched for real. That morning I felt obsessed for his touch. I needed to see him and get this all sorted out. My heart was literally hurting from his absence. I showed up to summer school and he still wasn’t there. Where was he? He must have dropped out. I decided to call him. No one answered so I left a message. “Austin, its Liv, I really need to talk to you, please call me or come by.” That evening I was going out of my mind wondering what happened to him when Zeke sent a text. “Hey just checking on you.” I smiled. At least someone was worried about me.
“Hey, I am doing much better in fact I am pretty much healed up. It must have been the mints ;)”.“Really? Wow those must have been good mints. But I have to admit I was hoping you would still need someone to bring you something so I had the excuse to come by :).” “I will do you one better, lets grab a pizza tonight.” “Already on my way.”
I fixed my hair and slid on my comfy shoes. I didn’t need to try to make Zeke like me. He was great like that. He wanted to be friends. It was such a perfect feeling. We picked up pizza and drove to the park. We ate on the hill watching a pack of kids playing with a soccer ball. It looked more like jungle ball with every kid fighting for the ball all at once. As soon as we finished Zeke ran down the hill and showed the kids some tricks. He was such a sweet guy. Any girl would be lucky to be with him. I had to do my best to find him someone.