She tried to talk herself into it for three days, but, finally, she relented and she decided it was time to talk to Alex. He didn’t say anything when she told him she decided to leave the club, and she asked him if he had any opinion on the matter. He said he wanted things to remain as they were and asked her to think it over.
Krishna lost it for a moment. “I’ve been thinking it over, Alex, and every time I think about going back and working on those bastards’ bikes, I keep imagining that I’ll be crouched on the ground doing my job, and one of them will come up to me with his dick hanging out and shove it in my mouth. And two or three others will be holding you back and making you watch.”
“That’s not going to happen, Krishna. I claimed you.”
She knew better, though. They would find a way to retaliate against her, and against Alex. But that wasn’t the point. “It doesn’t matter if they would actually lay hands on me or not. Don’t you understand? That terror will never go away. I will forever be looking over my shoulder and jumping or cringing when any of them are too close. Besides, you should think about yourself, too. My presence will continually remind everyone of what happened and that you’re always going to get in the way of what they really want to do to me.”
“So, you’re just going to walk away? What are you going to do for work?”
Krishna shrugged. “I have options. And maybe I’ll go to school instead, you know, one of those technical colleges, and I’ll get my certification as a mechanic. I can land a job at any shop with my skills.” She sighed and took his hand. “I’m not asking you to leave, Alex. I know that’s your family and you need them. But my parents can help me get settled in another gig.”
“And what about us?” He looked tormented.
Krishna had never thought she’d be the one reassuring Alex about their relationship. “I have no intention of letting you go. I love you, Alex. I want to be with you. I just can’t be part of the Ashes.”
It took hours to finally convince him, but, at long last, Alex agreed to talk to Pop and let him know she wouldn’t be back. Krishna agreed that, if they could arrange a separate location, she would do the custom work on Pop’s bike, and she was going to invite Brett to bring his piece of crap to her parents’ house so she could finish the job. But she definitely wasn’t going to do anything for anyone else.
“Are you absolutely sure?” Alex asked one last time as his phone rang and he showed her it was Pop calling. She nodded with determination and went to the bathroom to put some more medicine on her wounds while he took the call.
***
For some reason, Alex was nervous as he answered, “Hey, Pop.”
“Alex, how are you and your girl?”
“We’re fine. Krishna’s healing quickly.” Alex tried to keep his tone light and the information short. He didn’t know what the call was about, and he had no idea what the atmosphere at the clubhouse was like.
“Good, I’m glad. Listen, I’ve taken a lot of things into consideration, and I’ve made a few changes around here. I think you’ll be pleased in the long run. But I want to talk in person, if you could spare some time.”
“Sure, Pop. When do you want to get together?” Alex had to share Krishna’s news, and he wanted to do it as soon as possible. The longer he waited, the more it would fester inside him, and the more anxious he’d be.
“I’d be more than happy to talk tonight. I’m here, at the clubhouse, and I’m having a drink now. My wife doesn’t expect me for another few hours.”
He hadn’t quite expected it to be that soon, but he was actually relieved. “I’ll be there in about an hour.” He hung up and went in search of Krishna, who was studying her wounds in the mirror.
“Is everything all right?” she asked as he came up behind her.
“I think so. Pop wants to talk now. I have to leave for a while.” Her eyes grew large, and he turned her to face him. “I can’t take you with me. You know that.”
She swallowed hard. “I know. I’ll be fine. Go take care of business. I’ll be here waiting when you get back.” She kissed him, and Alex felt her desperation, her fear of being alone.
How would they ever figure out their relationship now? If she had this much trouble separating for a couple of hours, how could he leave Krishna behind every day and go to the clubhouse? And if Alex worried this much about her, how could he stand to walk away from her, knowing she was here or at least somewhere without him and completely vulnerable?
But tonight, he had no choice, and he reluctantly let her go. She walked him to the door and closed it behind him. With one last glance back, Alex climbed on his bike and took off, hoping to get through this confrontation in one piece. Something told him he wasn’t going to like a lot of what Pop had to say, and that his club’s leader hoped to sate him with some small victory.
The place was dead, as empty as it ever got, with just a few lingering brothers hanging around with nothing better to do. It made Alex uneasy, and he hoofed it quickly to Pop’s office, avoiding contact with anyone else. The door was open, and Pop was waiting for him. The old man motioned for him to close the door, and Alex complied before taking a seat in the big chair.
“You’re early,” Pop commented.
Alex shrugged. “A few minutes. I didn’t exactly have to crawl out of bed or anything.”
“Well, you’re here, and that’s what matters.” He lit a cigar, something Pop considered a treat and rarely did. The sickly sweet smell filled the air as he spoke again. “Damien’s out. We came to a mutual agreement, and I made sure he had the funds to set himself up somewhere far enough from here that he can start over. I also recommended him to another club in the area.”
That was a pleasant surprise, and Alex had a little trouble keeping his composure, wanting to smile and show his elation. Instead he said, “That’s appreciated.”
Pop nodded. “I’m glad to hear that. Now, I can’t just send him away and show favoritism. There has to be something to keep his backers from turning on me and the rest of my club. A few angry men can upset the entire balance of the club.”
“Fair enough.” Alex tensed. This was going to be the part he didn’t like, and he just wondered how bad it was going to be.
“Krishna can’t come here anymore. We’re working on a replacement for her, which could take some time, but she’s not welcome. She may not be purposely stirring anyone up, but I can’t have anyone here that distracts my boys and gets them all riled up.”
That wasn’t so bad, and Alex felt a wave of relief. “That’s fine. I actually meant to tell you she didn’t want to come back anyway. She sent her apologies and said she could finish your bike somewhere else if you wanted. But this whole incident scared her, and she doesn’t feel like she belongs.”
“So, it’s mutual, and I suppose that makes things easier for both sides.” Alex stared at him and realized he wasn’t finished. “We took a vote, Alex, and the club has also decided it’s best if you end your relationship with her, as well.”
Alex scoffed. “That’s ridiculous! I know how to keep things private.”
But Pop leaned on his elbows, chewing on the cigar. “This isn’t a suggestion, Alex. It’s an order. You can’t handle yourself when it comes to something threatening or something you think is insulting to her. Now, the guys around here can’t walk on eggshells to avoid your tornado of doom, and that means you have to get rid of the fuel behind the fire.”
Clenching his jaw, Alex asked, “What if I refuse?”
Pop spread his hands. “Then it’s out of my hands.”
“What is that supposed to mean?” Alex exploded. “Look, I love this family. But if it’s going to take away the person who is most important in my life, I’ll leave it.”
“I’m afraid that’s not an option,” Pop told him, his energy changing. He wasn’t trying to pacify Alex anymore. He was in fighting mode, and Pop was at a disadvantage based on age but not technique. He’d been a good boxer back in the day, and Alex didn’t want to face
him in a duel. “You are going to stay with us. I need you, and I’m not going to let you disappear on me. Now, break it off with the bitch. If you don’t, or if you try to disappear, all I have to do is hit the four on my speed dial, and Krishna will be removed from the picture permanently.”
Alex couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “You can’t be serious. No way. I’m calling your bluff, Pop. You wouldn’t put a hit out on an innocent woman.”
“You call her innocent? I’ve watched her around here. She refused to give anyone any attention. I don’t care if the two of you were fucking the whole time. She thinks she’s too good for the rest of us, and she may not have said anything to piss Damien off, but she pushed him over the edge with that attitude.” He slapped his hands on the desk and stood, and Alex rose to meet the threat on the other side. “You have no choices here, Alex. You tested me, you fought with your own, and you sided with a bitch who shouldn’t even be walking around on our soil. This is what you’ve gotten yourself. You leave here, go straight to her, and call it off. You come here tomorrow and do your damn job. And I’ll call off my dogs. Do you understand?”
What could Alex do but agree? He could find a way around it all later, but right now, he had to reassure Pop he would do what was asked of him. Devastated and livid at his inability to find a better way, he let his head hang in defeat. “All right, Pop. You win. I’ll leave Krishna. I’ll find some way to make her believe I don’t want to be with her. I’ll come back tomorrow and the next day and keep my mouth shut. I’ll do my job and stick to the routine.”
He lifted his gaze to meet Pop’s, shooting lasers at him. “But I want your word that you’ll let Krishna go, unharmed. I don’t want her followed or threatened or hurt. I don’t want any interference at all in her life. I want you and everyone else here to forget she existed. Am I clear?”
“That’s fair,” Pop said. “I can give you that. One misstep, though, or any suspicion that you’re lying and still seeing her, and all bets are off. Like I said, I can’t lose you, Alex. So, if you care about the woman, and you care about your brothers, do the right thing and let her go.”
Alex said nothing, just turned on his heel and left. He kept his eyes forward and his mouth shut, but he didn’t have to look to know that several of his brothers watched him with cocky smiles and sneers. That was fine; in the long run, he’d find a way to make them pay for this. They were screwing with his life and his happiness, and they’d already damaged Krishna, mentally if not so much physically. If he didn’t find a way out of this, Alex was going to break her heart and hate himself.
He had counted on his brothers, believed in the Ashes, for so long that he didn’t know what to do without them. But they weren’t the same family they used to be, and Alex wasn’t the same man, either. How important was the club to him now? After what they’d done to Krishna? After the ultimatum Pop gave him? Did he still need them, or could he go it alone?
But he wasn’t alone anymore. If he abandoned the Ashes, he still had Krishna, and she meant more to him than anything. The problem was, he was trapped. If he stayed with the club, she would be safe, but Alex had to leave her. And if he left the club, he could have her…until Pop hired his hitman and took her away permanently.
There were ways for them to disappear so no one would find them, not even a hitman. But Krishna had real family. She and her parents were close, and he couldn’t expect her to give that up for him.
Alex rode for a long time, letting his mind wander and hoping an idea would suddenly present itself to him. But he eventually ran out of hope and pulled into the parking lot at Krishna’s complex. He sat on the bike, staring at her apartment and imagining never seeing her again. He didn’t know if he could do this.
But knowing she was alive somewhere was better than visiting her grave.
With reluctant resolve, he mounted the stairs and headed toward his fate.
CHAPTER TWENTY
Krishna watched the clock with the same anxiousness she often embodied during a Cubs game, willing time to move faster and Alex to come back. She curled on the couch, wrapped tightly in a blanket that carried his scent, using that to maintain her calm. But she was starting to worry and didn’t know how long she could keep control before going into a panic.
She gazed down at her phone, wanting it to ring. She wanted Alex to call and say he was on his way back and that he loved her and everything was fine. But there was nothing, not even a quick text. She’d already restarted the thing twice to make sure it wasn’t glitching out. She couldn’t miss it if he did call. But it hadn’t mattered.
She heard the knob turn on the front door and inhaled sharply. For a split second, she considered that Pop had only called Alex in to assure she was alone so that some of the boys could come finish what they started. It nearly sent her into a frenzy, thinking fast about what she could use as a weapon. If she moved fast enough, she could get to the kitchen and grab a knife.
But the door swung open, and Alex stood there, luscious and enticing. And alone. Krishna nearly sobbed in her immense relief until she saw the grim look on his face. He stepped inside and shut the door, and Krishna rose slowly, keeping the blanket around her shoulders. It felt like a coat of protection, and she didn’t care that she used it as a crutch right now.
“Hey,” he said, his voice gravelly.
“Hi,” she said, her heart racing. She crept toward him until they were inches apart, and she gazed up at him in question. She expected a warm embrace, maybe a passionate kiss. But Alex didn’t even reach out and touch her. It raised several red flags, and Krishna tried to put on a false show of bravery and happiness. She offered a tentative smile. “How did it go?”
He swallowed visibly and lifted his eyes to look over her head, refusing to meet her gaze. “We need to talk.”
Krishna nearly collapsed right there. Whatever news he had to share was going to hurt to hear, or he would just tell her. But she nodded, using every bit of her strength to take his hand and lead him over to the couch. She sat at an angle to face him, clinging to the blanket around her neck for dear life. “Tell me what’s wrong.”
He scrubbed a hand over his face and sighed. “I don’t even know where to start. I can’t…” He trailed off, shaking his head and dropping it low. “Krishna, I love you, more than anything I’ve ever loved in my life.”
Now, it was Krishna’s turn to swallow hard. She knew already what was coming, and she fought the urge to cry. She’d told herself that, if he chose his brothers over her, she would understand. But that didn’t make it any easier. “And I love you, too,” she said, keeping her voice soft and low so it didn’t crack or show any emotion.
He nodded shortly. “Pop sent Damien packing, set him up somewhere else with another club. Damien’s an asset in a lot of ways, and that’s why Pop didn’t just throw him on his ass. But he’s not allowed anywhere near the Ashes anymore.”
That was good news, Krishna supposed, but since she didn’t intend to go back to the clubhouse, it didn’t affect her so much. Unless…
“Is Pop demanding that I come back and work? Because I can suck it up, if Damien’s gone.”
She wouldn’t have thought Alex could look anymore forlorn, but she was wrong.
“No, in fact, you’re banned from the clubhouse. And the club. You aren’t to have contact with any members.”
It didn’t take a genius to figure out what he meant by that. “No one. That includes you.”
He nodded, and lines of stressed formed around his eyes. “I have to leave you, Krishna. I have to let you go, and you need to move. I can pull some cash together to help you start over somewhere else, and I want you to go stay with your parents until you figure out where you want to go. I need to know you’re safe.”
Anger started to boil in her stomach. “Do you really think they’re going to waste time following you around to make sure that you’re not seeing me anymore? Come on, Alex!”
“It’s not that simple!” he exploded, bounding off t
he couch and starting to pace the small room frantically.
“Isn’t it? Besides, if you love me that much, more than anything else, then you could leave the club.” She stood up and grabbed his hands, stopping his motion and pleading with him with her eyes. “We could start over somewhere else, like Damien. I’m sure there are plenty of clubs looking for an incredible tattoo artist. And I can get a job as a mechanic, and we can just keep our heads down.”
He cut his eyes away, and she knew he’d already made up his mind. “I can’t leave the club, Krishna.”
She jerked away, dropping the blanket and crossing her arms over her chest. “Can’t, or won’t?”
“I said can’t. And it has nothing to do with me and my needs, other than the need to keep you safe.” He stared at her with hard eyes. “I would rather lose you and know you’re safe than try to hold on and worry every minute that you’re going to lose your life.”
“What are you talking about?” she asked, confused and throwing up her hands in frustration. “If I’m not bothering anyone, and Damien’s not even around to threaten me, no one else is going to step up and harass me, especially when they don’t have to look at me.”
This Savage Love: A Bad Boy Romance Boxed Set Page 89