by Soraya Naomi
Carmine advises, “You certainly have the money. Club 7 has become a hot spot for celebrities as of late because your security is tight. If the club keeps prospering, your income forecast for next year will be ridiculous. You’re going to make a fortune. What better way to use it than to forge new, more powerful national-level alliances?”
“Then set it up.” I’m not one to hesitate in decision-making these days. “Carmine can contact that senator and handle all the finances.”
“Looking forward to it,” Carmine replies and combs his hair back. Right now, he reminds me a lot of myself.
“By the way,” Logan adds. “Wallace thinks he’s getting Medlov back within twenty-four hours.”
“Medlov is already in FBI custody,” I inform him. “Capo John confirmed it just five minutes ago. They have Medlov and Maxim. Those two will live in an American hell for the rest of their lives.”
“Which DA is on it? Ours?” Logan asks me.
“No, but there’s so much evidence that the FBI will take care of that. They’ll get life in prison without the possibility of parole. And in prison, they’ll be tortured and raped every night as penance for harming Cam.”
“Good. Then I guess we’re done for the night.” Logan checks his watch.
“Yes. Go. Celebrate Christmas.” I face all of them. “Carmine, go to our parents’ before our mother starts calling me.”
“Just come with me for an hour?” Carmine suggests.
“I can’t leave Cam.” I don’t want to.
“Okay. I’ll be back with Mary tomorrow.” He doesn’t press the matter. “Buon Natale, fratello.” Merry Christmas, brother.
“I’ll be in touch soon,” Logan comments as he takes off with Carmine, and Fallon and Luca get up from their chair.
I notice Fallon swiping a tear from the corner of her eye. “Sorry. It’s just with Christmas, I really miss her a lot.”
Luca hugs Fallon and presses a kiss to her temple. “We understand. I miss her a lot too.” And he grins at me curiously. “Cam, sweetheart, you’re making Fallon cry.”
“Don’t call her sweetheart!” I object.
“You called Fallon dolcezza all the time when I first met her,” he jokes. “This is payback.”
“Fuck you.”
He merely smirks.
“You want us to stay? We can stay over too,” Fallon offers, but Luca’s brows pull together and he shakes his head vigorously right before Fallon glances at him sideways.
“I don’t think a sleepover was on Luca’s calendar this Christmas. And I want to be alone with Cam, dolcezza.” I wink at Fallon.
“I swear to god, when Cam wakes, I’m going to call her sweetheart every day,” Luca teases.
I laze back in my chair. “Try. She won’t let you.”
“And why do you let him, Fallon?” He aims a scowl at her.
“Oh my god!” She throws up her hands in defeat. “I’m not getting in the middle of this idiotic discussion. Cam, sweetheart – she’ll let me call her sweetheart – I’ll be back tomorrow with presents.” And she kisses my cheek before Luca tugs her out.
Just like that, I’m once again surrounded by silence, except for the beat of Cam’s heart monitor.
I unbutton my shirt and shrug it off. Then I push the button on the bed to move the mattress into a sitting position so that I can take off that hospital gown they have Cam wearing. And I deftly place my shirt around her shoulders, not tucking in her arms and making sure not to disturb her IV, so that she’s dressed in her favorite attire, one of my white shirts, which is what she would always wear while lounging around the loft.
By now, I know exactly how to hold her without twisting any wires. I slip in behind her and hug her to me tightly. It’s been a long, trying day, and my thoughts swallow me up.
I need Cam to come back to me so badly that it consumes my entire being. Every thought, every action, and every reaction is a result of that one thing I desperately want. It’s not a good place to be, and it’s the exact type of hell I keep living in. Rage is one of the strongest emotions, but grief destroys you.
I end this Christmas Eve the same way that I have every night for the last eight weeks. By imploring my love to wake up. “It’s time to open those beautiful brown eyes, sweetheart.”
To no avail – once again.
CHAPTER 41
Camilla
I never wanted to be weak again, but I’m defenseless like this. The longer I’m trapped in this limbo, the more I worry. The same words resonate in my head. Clear sentences are random. Still, I hear Adriano most often. When I don’t feel him, I’m afraid that he’s left me. Deep in my soul, I sense the fire that Adriano and I started to build almost three years ago. And in the darkness that surrounds me at all times nowadays, I swear I feel the sizzling heat of its flames.
But I still don’t know how much time is passing, because for me, it’s at a full stop. I do realize that life must be continuing, and I’m afraid that Adriano is moving on, especially when I figure out what’s happening. When the voices break through my fog.
“...shut it off...dead body...wedding bands.”
No! Am I dead? What the hell is this talk about wedding bands?
Out of nowhere, I hear music. Lyrics and notes that I remember vividly. It’s our song: Ed Sheeran’s ‘Thinking Out Loud’.
In my mind’s eye, tears streak down my cheeks. I feel as If I’m in our bed in my favorite position, with Adriano spooning me. I smell him. Yet I can’t touch him. And I can’t see him. That sensation deepens the fractures in my heart.
Adriano’s voice is close to my ear, and it’s ever so clear. “Come home to me, because that’s where I’ll be all the days of my life, waiting for you. I watch you. I exist for you. I belong to you. The time has come for you to open your eyes, Camilla Montesi.”
I’m drawn to the enthralling timbre that fills my being with love. How? I don’t know, but with everything I am, I feel him bleeding through my veins. My wild and untamed man.
How I miss you.
Then he kisses me in a way that I sense deep in my bones. It’s the kind of kiss that bursts with equal parts longing and love. The kind of kiss a man can only give when his soul has found its matching part. And when his soul is despairing about losing its other half.
Wait a minute! Did he say Camilla Montesi? He’s marrying me! He’s trying to get me to wake up...by marrying me? That’s odd.
Though now, willpower burns deep inside, and I scream at myself to wake the fuck up. I trust the voice within, telling me to fight my way back to him.
CHAPTER 42
Adriano
I work out but don’t eat as much as I used to, and according to my family, I’ve lost weight. But I can’t afford to appear weak, so I keep going, determined that Cam will wake and our baby will be born healthy. I have my blood family to take care of. I have an expanding mafia family that relies on this entire empire I’ve built with Luca. And that empire is no longer in danger, because Medlov has been sentenced and is having a miserable life in prison.
However, as New Year’s Day comes and goes and the dreaded four-month deadline comes closer and closer, my heartbreak reaches a new low.
I’m resting my head on Cam’s pillow and caressing her stomach. Her middle is growing, and she has a small bump now that the baby is seventeen weeks old. I slide my palm over it and abruptly sit up when I feel a kick against it. Such a soft little kick.
“Cam, the baby kicked.” A frisson of elation lifts my spirits, but it’s fleeting. “My baby, are you moving around in there? You’re taking such good care of mommy for me.” I rub my eyes and return to my previous position, securing my arms around Cam’s middle.
Today, the last day of February, marks a dark day in my life. It marks the fourth month Cam has been a comatose patient. The doctor has assured me that the baby is growing fine. She’s just a little tiny, but that’s not abnormal. Or he, since I didn’t want to know the sex. I want to find that out with Cam. Making that
choice made me realize how lonely I currently am. I’ve walked alone through this mafia world before – we all enter this world alone. But if we’re lucky, we might find that one person who makes the journey worthwhile. Someone whom we can sustain a love with through a lifetime of murder and anarchy. Cam is my someone, and I will not give her up.
When Luca enters the room, I slide off the bed and into the chair as he hands me a cup of steaming coffee.
“Thanks.”
“Has Marc come in yet to talk to you?” He takes a sip of his own drink.
I shake my head.
“What are you thinking?” he asks and stretches his legs out in front of him.
Every once in a while, either Fallon or Luca forces me to talk, to let it out. I place the cup on the nightstand. “I think about my regrets constantly. In this mafia life, everyone loses someone important at some point. It’s the inevitable ways of the criminal life we’ve chosen. Loss is unavoidable. I pray she won’t be that someone for me. You know what the worst thing of all is? That I wanted this life with her so badly, and the few months we had together, we didn’t even get to enjoy one another because I was busy with work to secure our life. And now, I’m left with nothing.”
“No, you have us. A baby. You still have her.”
“It’s all shells and shadows. Life was much easier before love became involved. Before feelings became involved,” I state bitterly.
“But it wasn’t better.” The words are spoken softly by Luca.
“That’s true. I honestly just screwed around with so many women because no one could hold my attention, until her.” I rummage my hands through my hair and link my fingers behind my head. “Fuck! I miss the sound of her excited laugh echoing in my ear.” My gaze redirects to the door when Marc steps inside. I’m not looking forward to our conversation about Cam’s condition.
Marc’s expression is even more disheartening than usual as he’s trailed by James and Fallon. James and Marc drag two chairs opposite me, and Fallon stands behind Luca.
“Adriano, Luca,” Marc greets us, and then he addresses James and me, “First, I’m going to give you my opinion from a purely medical point of view. Cam’s chances of partial recovery are now less than fifteen percent. The longer she stays in a coma, the lesser her chances are, and we’re at a pivotal point where you need to ask yourself if you think it’s wise to prolong this situation?”
My barriers go up immediately. “What are you saying?”
“That keeping someone alive in this condition is also difficult for the family.”
“She’s pregnant! Don’t even mention what you’re about to say.” I clench my jaw.
James is rubbing his chin thoughtfully while staring at Cam’s closed eyes.
Marc’s tone remains composed. “Even the pregnancy can become a risk, Adriano. Her blood pressure is fluctuating, and that’s a concern for the baby. If she stays like this, we’ll have to operate when the due date comes; and that’s not without risks either. I just want my brother and you to be well informed. Sometimes, when the family knows the patient wouldn’t want this kind of life or when it’s impossible to move on, the family decides it’s best to terminate their treatment.”
First, I hug Cam’s hand to my chest. Then, I calmly release her to leap up and whisper-shout with my finger pointed at Marc. “No one is turning anything off!”
“Adriano, hear Marc out first.” Luca places his hand on my shoulder.
But I shrug off Luca’s hand forcefully “No. There’s no discussion! Don’t defy me on this.” My nostrils flare from anger.
“Then what do you suggest?” James looks me straight in the eye so that I can witness his torment as a father. “She wouldn’t want this kind of life.”
“I don’t want a life without her.” My voice rises in rage.
“Adriano,” Marc placates. “There’s only one person who has the authority to make this decision. I’m sorry, but the next of kin decides, and that’s her father, James.”
My gaze flies to James. “You wouldn’t...!”
James sends me a hopeless look. “I don’t know...How long do we keep her like this?”
James surges up just as my anger sets off into pure fury and I jump on him over Cam’s bed, ensuring not to hurt her, and we fall backward onto the floor with a loud thud.
“Oh my god!” Fallon shrieks.
“Cam’s in there! She’s carrying my child. Your grandchild! You will shut it off over my dead fucking body!” I bunch James’s lapels in my fist, but Luca drags me off him.
“Enough now,” Marc orders in a sharp tone. “You two can’t do this in here, or else no one can see Cam anymore. Adriano, sit down and let me finish because you’ll like what I have to say next. Now, I believe that my niece is indeed fighting in there, and she’s responding to Adriano every night. I’ve seen her brain activity spike whenever he’s around, James. So my advice, as her uncle, is to keep trying to lure her back.”
I swipe the back of my hand over my mouth as James straightens his ruffled clothes.
“I’m sorry,” I offer because I shouldn’t antagonize her father; the one who holds the power over any decisions about Cam.
“I understand you’re upset, but it’s difficult for the rest of her family too, Adriano,” James explains, without judgment, making me feel like an absolute ass, yet my fury overrides any logical reasoning.
My chest is heaving violently as I’m transfixed with the thought of losing Cam.
“Let’s continue later when we’ve calmed a bit.” Marc extends his arm, leading James out, and Luca follows them while Fallon stays with me.
She claims Luca’s seat. “Do you think James would make that decision without consulting you?”
“I don’t think so. But I’m not leaving it up to fate. Fate hasn’t been my friend. I’ve fought and killed to have a life with her. I won’t let this ruin it.”
“You shouldn’t,” Fallon says and bites her lip.
I know exactly what she’s inferring. “There’s only one way; if she’s my wife.” I swipe my finger over my phone screen and call Henry.
“Adriano?” he answers after one ring.
“I have a problem regarding Cam. Her next of kin decides how long we keep her alive while she’s in this condition. And that’s James, not me. I can’t have that. I need to be her husband. Can you arrange that?”
“Hmmm, yes, I can. I’ll have to change her records, her marital status. Um, I’ll probably need a certificate that you’ll need to sign and forge her signature on and a witness for both of you. Then I can upload it into City Hall’s system.”
“How long will that take?” I ask.
“Give me two hours.”
“Okay. Hurry. And, Henry, this is the most important thing I’ve ever asked of you. Do this without anyone else in the Syndicate finding out, especially James, and I’ll promote you from associate to an official member.”
Henry will be able to quit his dead-end administrative job when he becomes a member.
“I’m on it. I’ll bring you the marriage license as soon as I’m done changing her digital records. Are you at the hospital?”
“Yes. I’ll be waiting for you here.”
“So, is she taking your last name? And what date did you marry her? You need to pick a date before she went into a coma,” Henry explains.
“Yes, she’s taking my surname.” Then I look at Fallon. “A date?”
“Just pick a random date in September or October. It won’t be your real anniversary anyway.”
That’s true. “Wedding date is October 25.”
“Okay. I’ll text you when I’m on the way.” Henry ends the call.
“And?” Fallon looks at me expectantly.
“He’s marrying us now,” I say as an unnerving feeling slithers over my skin. This should be a happy time for me and Cam. “And he’s bringing the marriage license later.”
“You need wedding rings.” Fallon reaches for her purse that’s on the floor. “I have
a card...”
“I actually know a jeweler on Madison Avenue who could engrave two wedding rings for me immediately. If I call him, can you pick them up?”
“Of course.” She takes out her car keys from her purse.
“I’ll text you the engraving. I want two silver-gold wedding bands—” I’m interrupted by Luca.
“I knew you were cooking up a plan, so James and Marc are occupied in the waiting room.” Luca cocks his head to my co-conspirator. “Wedding bands?”
“I’m marrying her today,” I admit.
“I didn’t expect anything less,” he admits around a gloomy smile. “I assume you contacted Henry to make it official?”
“Yes, he’s working on it as we speak. Make sure James is occupied for the next two hours.”
Luca nods as he rests his hand on the small of Fallon’s back, and she goes to retrieve my wedding rings.
Hurriedly, I send Henry a text to message me a photo of Cam’s signature, and I request a pen and paper from a nurse to practice forging it.
***
Exactly one hour and forty-three minutes later, Henry, Luca, Fallon, and I are assembled around Cam’s bed.
Unfortunately, Marc interrupts us, and when he catches Fallon’s guilty expression, he demands, “What’s going on?” His attention shifts from me in my black suit, complete with jacket, to Cam.
“Marc,” I start. “You and I know that she’s responding to me. I can’t let James have control over her life.”
“Adriano.” Marc’s attitude is surprisingly compassionate. “I understand you, but I honestly don’t think he would do that.”
“Well, I’m not going to take that chance,” I state, leaving no more room to argue.
Just when I think Marc’s about to cause trouble, he relents, “Fine. You two will marry anyway.”
“We will,” I agree, staring at my soon-to-be wife.
I dressed Cam in my white dress shirt, like I do every day, and combed her hair, tucking the strands behind her ears. The scar on her head is covered by her hair, and she looks absolutely beautiful. Peaceful. It appeases, yet saddens me at the same time.