by A. K. Koonce
“What the hell are you doing?” He shifts nervously, his steely eyes darting to his brother’s sleeping form before coming back to me.
“I’ll freeze if I stay in wet clothes.” I say it slowly to him as if he’s a child. “People die of pneumonia. Did you know that?”
With confusion-filled eyes, he stares at me.
“That’s not how humans get pneumonia …”
Ignoring his reply, I turn away from him and his reasoning.
I’d take off my soaked vest as well, but I’m not wearing a bra. I don’t want poor Darrio to have a fucking heart attack.
Gently, I lay out my only pair of jeans near the warm fire. A tangle of white locks meets my fingertips as I try to dry my thick hair a little.
With a short stick, I stoke the meager embers into a small fire. A minute passes. My gaze clings to the flickering flames.
I shoot Darrio a look of annoyance before I take my place on my shabby pallet once again. The thin blanket does little to warm me. I shift even closer to the heat.
Lying on my back once more, I realize Darrio still stands as he was; staring at me with his lips set into a tight line.
“Swallow down your ego and take your pants off already. I won’t peek. I promise.”
It’s a lie and we both know it.
I haven’t seen a man naked in almost a year. I’ve never seen a man as gorgeous as Darrio naked in my entire life.
Never let an opportunity pass you by Lady Ivory used to tell me.
I won’t, Lady Ivory, I won’t.
My fingers thread through my hair as I lean up on my elbow to give him my fullest attention.
A smile almost touches his lips before he pushes it back down. He turns fully to me, and my heart races as my eyes widen.
Is he serious?
The ever-scowling Darrio has a playful side?
His hands reach slowly behind him, pulling at the neck of his long sleeve shirt. My lips part as he lifts the traitorous shirt from his body.
With torturously slow movements, the shirt rises from his abdomen. Hard lines cut into a v along his hips. A light trail of dark hair disappears into the top of his low-slung jeans. Jagged scar tissue skims his side demanding my attention just as much as his defined chest does. Black ink swirls across his wide shoulders and reaches down to the mark of the Hopeless on his left arm. The intricate tattoos stand out against the white, twisting scars that adorn his hard body.
His long hair is ruffled when he finally pulls the shirt off. The firelight glints in his eyes. For once I’m thankful for the moonlight, the firelight, all the light that graces his gorgeous body just for me.
The two of us stare at one another. It’s the first time a few minutes have passed without one of us saying something foul to the other.
It’s almost nice not hating him.
His fingers begin unbuttoning his pants.
Okay, it’s more than nice.
It’s fantastic.
He doesn’t look at me as he pushes his jeans down his hips and kicks off his boots. He shoves his clothes in a crumbled pile near the flames. In just his boxers, he turns his back on me and walks to his pallet, ten feet from mine, and lies down.
He stares daggers at me from across the fire. Wide eyes watch my every move.
Playtime is over. I’m his untrusted companion once more.
I doubt he’ll sleep a wink tonight.
Cold hair clings to my slight shoulders and I shuffle a little closer to the fire.
Darrio cocks his head quickly, getting a better view of me.
“Calm down,” I hiss, “I’m just cold. I’m not making a run for it, I swear.”
He settles back into his blanket.
“Not right now anyway.” I smirk to myself, slightly pleased to see him scowling again.
Again, he cocks his head at me and we hold glares for several seconds. His jaw tics, and he stands. He jerks his blanket from the ground and his feet scuff angrily against the dirt. With long strides, he makes his way toward me. He throws the blanket near my side and lies down. I jump when his warm arm wraps around my cold stomach.
“What are you doing?” My spine is stiff against his chest.
“Making sure we don’t lose our guide.”
“By cuddling me? You’re fighting back with cuddles?” I keep my eyes on the flickering flames, refusing to look at him as he holds me.
“I’m not a cuddler.” His breath fans against my neck, a tingling sensation follows its wake.
“This feels suspiciously like cuddling, Rio.”
“I hate when you call me that.”
A smirk curves my lips. I’m going to have to say that’s a victory for the night. It was a good night all in all. I got to see Darrio almost naked, my clothes are partially clean, and now I’m surrounded by warmth as I sleep.
In comparison to my normal nights alone on the streets, tonight’s been decent.
My legs shift against his. A constricting feeling begins to build in my chest from my lack of space. I guess I’m not used to being so close to someone. It makes me more restless. I wiggle a little, trying to find comfort on the ground with the weight of Darrio pressing into me.
Then I still, my eyes going wide as I feel his hard dick low against my back.
“Stop. Moving.” His gravelly voice demands into my hair.
My lips part with a surprised smile. A warm feeling spreads through me, my heart skipping slightly.
I’m not sure why the dirty thoughts begin to fly through my mind, but they do.
With intent, I roll my hips; shifting a little more. His large hand splays wide across my abdomen.
“I said stop moving.” It’s a plea almost; gruff and rasping.
My thighs clench from just the sound of his voice against my neck.
His voice always sinks right into me, and right now it seems to drive deep into my chest.
Slow movements fill my hips as I grind against him. His head dips low, leaning into my neck. Warm, heavy breaths kiss my shoulder blade.
“Zakara.” His whisper soaks into me, sinking right to my core.
All of the terrible things we’ve said to one another have led to this.
Rough fingers skim down my hips, over my underwear. He cups me between my legs and my lips part.
My eyes fling open, assessing our surroundings. The other two men still face the woods. Their snores are barely heard over my gasping breath.
For a second, my mind tries to think this through. I try desperately to think through the haze in my mind to find an ulterior motive that Darrio might have for getting me in this position.
Could he hurt me?
Steal from me?
What does he gain?
His lips press lightly against the curve of my neck. He shifts against me. Swiftly he pushes my underwear to the side and I feel his smooth length against me.
All logical thought slips from my mind.
I arch against his chest, my leg shifting to accommodate him.
A low groan filters from his lips and onto my neck as he pushes against my sensitive skin. Slowly, his dick sinks into me. I bite my lip hard, and a long, muted breath escapes me. His hand comes back up to my hip and my fingers grip his wrist as he unhurriedly slides deep into me. Sharp teeth sink into my shoulder and my moan matches his.
Our pleasure is silenced. A mixture of anxiety and excitement swirls dangerously within my chest. The rasping sound of my breath is all that can be heard. I can’t look away from Daxdyn and Ryder for fear that I’ll be caught screwing the one person I thought I hated.
Shamelessly, I meet his hard thrusts. My back arches against him, finding a perfect and unhurried rhythm.
Gods above, does he have rhythm.
Painfully, his fingers dig into my hipbone as he guides my every move. His hand skims low until he pushes aside my panties once more, his fingers rough against my flesh.
I gasp when his fingertips push against my clit. My eyes flutter closed, and I moan as I shift ag
ainst his talented fingers.
At the sound of my unfiltered appreciation, Darrio’s other hand slips beneath my head. Warm fingers brush against my parted lips as he shoves his hand over my mouth, muffling my voice. The quieted moans seem to fuel him on. Harder, he drives his dick into me. His fingers roll against me, building a restless energy low in my stomach.
I raise my hand and reach back for him. I run my fingers through his dark hair, pulling at the roots.
My thighs shake and, with another long stroke, I come hard around him. With my eyes clenched tightly closed, I open my mouth and bite down rigidly on his fingers.
A humming groan tingles into my neck, his beard scraping against my skin. With another jerking motion, he stills against me. Sweat clings to our bodies, not an inch of space separates us. Slowly, he lowers his hand from my mouth.
The thrashing sound of my heart is all I can focus on. I open my eyes. The firelight greets me. The other two men are still sleeping soundly. Nothing’s changed. All is the same.
Neither of us move. We don’t speak. There’s nothing to say.
He slips himself from me, shifting away. The tingling feeling still spikes through my veins. For a moment, his warm hand holds my hip. A gentle kiss skims across my shoulder before he turns away from me, lying flat on his back.
“Goodnight, Kara.”
Tension fills my body at the sound of my name. It’s the first time he’s ever actually said my name and it causes an odd feeling to drift through me.
And yet, nothing’s changed.
Chapter Twelve
The Beauty in Scars
I do sleep. Very comfortably actually. Just before the cloudy sunlight touches the horizon, Darrio’s lips skim my shoulder, sending a shiver all through my body.
My lashes slowly flutter open. His steely gaze holds mine. There’s an animalistic look in his eyes. It’s tinged with confusion and want. I know he’ll never ask me to tell him my feelings.
And that’s good. Because I have no idea what they are.
His brother was right; Darrio and I are the same. He just expresses his anger while I misplace mine. Rough hands meet my abdomen, brushing across my ribs. My thighs clench together as a shiver runs across my flesh
“Did I hurt you?” he whispers, his attention shifting toward the dry ground.
The two of us are in uncharted territory. We were so good at hating each other. It’s apparently hard to know how to be civil to one another.
I shake my head at him.
Ever so lightly, his fingers skim across my ribs. I feel the tingle of his magic burn lightly through me. My eyes flutter from his surprisingly gentle touch.
My gaze shifts, trying to capture his every move.
I’ll need to get some Silphium when we get to the coast. The pretty plant that Saint’s Inn always has in high supply flashes through my mind. As beautiful as a little fire fae baby would be, I’m not at all prepared for a smaller, angrier version of Darrio running around.
“Where’d this one come from?” he asks me in a gravelly voice, pulling me from my thoughts.
I lick my lips, my gaze pulling away from his to notice the pale scar running along my side.
“I got caught stealing from a drunk when I was seventeen.” A fond smile pulls at my lips. “I don’t steal from drunks anymore. Very often.”
He smirks at me as his fingers continue tracing along my body. Making me crazy.
“And this one?” He skims the side of my neck, his thumb brushing over my jaw.
I’ve never talked with him like this. I don’t know if I’ve ever spoke with anyone like this.
“A man tried to take more than I offered once.” The smile falls from my lips as I remember the first person I ever killed.
Darrio’s brows raise high.
Carefully, as if he isn’t sure he’ll actually do it, he leans into me and presses a gentle kiss to the imperfect line against the base of my neck. My eyes flutter closed as he seals a new memory to the scar.
Lady Ivory always said I’d be perfect if I wasn’t flawed by so many scars. If I was more of a lady and less of thief. I always told her she’d be perfect if she wasn’t a whore. And we’d laugh, both of us ignoring what life had given us.
“You’re … more than just your scars. You know that, right?”
I nod, my eyes narrowing on his worried face. It’s a weird look he’s giving me.
He pauses, as if it’s hard for him to admit what he’s about to say to me. “You’re more than just beautiful.”
Again, I nod slowly.
I don’t know how we got here. Somewhere during our journey, I went from being the fucking human to being beautiful in his eyes.
I haven’t decided if he’s still an asshole or not. At the moment he isn’t, but just give it time and I’m sure we’ll fall right back into the bickering hate we held before.
His icy gaze dances across my features.
“Never forget that.”
He glances to my lips. We’ve had sex, and yet, he hasn’t tried to kiss me again. A tingling feeling returns low in my stomach as I remember the way his lips felt against mine.
Stiffly he nods, breaking his attention away from my mouth before he pulls away from me. My stomach sinks hard as he stands and starts to pull on his pants.
The tides have changed. I can’t say that I have. I feel it though. I’m different. Because of these three ridiculous fae, I’m different now.
And I’m terrified of what that means.
Chapter Thirteen
The Kingdom
The glaring, diluted sunlight lashes out at me. I narrow my gaze on the horizon. This ship, the sea, and the growing anxiety within my chest has tortured me for two hours now.
We glide through the ocean at a snail’s pace on the Nobel ship. I have mixed feelings; wanting to finally arrive in the kingdom and also wanting to never step foot on its terrible land.
There was once a neighboring island, that’s now been swallowed up by the ocean, that was fondly named Fire Island. That name feels right. That name fits Juvar perfectly.
Daxdyn watches me while I keep my attention focused on the shore that I know will come into view at any moment.
“What will it be like, the city of the Hopeless?” All I can think about is how much I want it to be different from this world. Separate from this hell that I’ve grown up in.
Salty ocean air chills my flesh and I pull my arms around myself. It’s almost here. I can feel it. It’s a hell I never wanted to return to. It’s like the land is pushing against the sea, not the other way around.
“It’s different. Beautiful. Not at all like your world. It’s … just different. You’ll be different there too,” Daxdyn says in a whisper. His attention is held on me, but I can’t bring myself to look at him. “Your powers can’t awaken until you’ve been Hopelessly reborn.” He clasps his hands against the railing. Daxdyn’s still oblivious to the land up ahead. He doesn’t feel it the way I do. It isn’t calling him home.
My shoulders tense just thinking about it. Am I really what they say I am? What if it’s all just a lie? What if I’m not special at all? What if my father died for nothing?
For hours, the guards of this ship have looked at us skeptically. It’s a plotting look that makes me want to risk my life jumping over the railing right now.
What did Ryder promise them for allowing us passage on their ship?
Currently, two guards stand only a few yards away. They’re speaking in low voices and their attention is held on us. The weight of their gazes are pressing into me; setting me on edge. My nerves tingle through me, but still I hold a look of self-assurance safely in place.
We were told we were offered safe passage to the kingdom.
But I always know a lie when I hear one.
Darrio glances to me out of the corner of his steely eyes. It’s like he can feel my anxiety despite my neutral expression. Hesitantly, he takes a single step closer to me. I feel his strong chest brushing lightly aga
inst my back.
If he and I were different people, Darrio might wrap his arms around me, and I’d lean into him. He’d tell me it’d be alright in the quietest of whispers. And I’d believe him.
If we were different people.
But we’re not.
Daxdyn’s simple happiness falls away, turning into confusion as he lifts his hands to catch the light pieces of gray flakes drifting through the air.
“Is that,” slowly his brows pull together, “snow?”
It isn’t. I wish it was. I wish the ash falling from the sky was simply cold weather instead of the destruction of the city up ahead. I can’t bring myself to correct Daxdyn. It’s easier just to ignore the pale ash that’s clinging to my hair and lashes. It brushes across my tightly closed lips, pushing to seep into my body.
Ryder leans into my side, his shoulder bumping mine. His attention burns across my body in a demanding way. My gaze pulls from the lapping waves of the dark ocean, and I look at him.
A simple, easy smile is all he gives me. It makes my heart thunder to life.
He glances away for only a second. Then the happiness slips from his lips.
“What the hell is that?” His eyes narrow on the horizon.
I know what it is before I even turn to look.
Fire billows up into the heavens from the destroyed city up ahead. Impossibly steep, dark buildings claw at the gray and blue sky. Rods of steel hang like talons from the remains of old skyscrapers. The tops of the structures are jagged, fallen away over time. They teeter with the strong winds of the ocean as if the world is pulling at the remainder of the lives that live here. The cities are worse, much worse than the smaller villages.
The cities depended on the fae more and the remnants of powerful magic still lingers in the air here. It’s dangerous and a constant state of combustion.
But humans cling to these deadly shores in hopes that the Hopeless will return to us.
Magic no longer supports our world like it once did.
A charred and broken society is all that‘s left in its wake. The blackened and burning city reflects in Ryder’s beautiful gaze. I might always want to see this terrible world through his eyes.