by Larsen, K
“This isn't anything like Ghost.” He whines when he catches me staring at him. A few other classmates join me in a fit of laughter at Colin’s statement. The teacher moves behind him and guides his hands until his lump vaguely resembles a vase.
“When the piece is shaped to your satisfaction, slide a wire under the base and set it aside to harden up.” She says.
Having pretty much given up hope of creating something stunning Colin slides the wire under his to set it aside. As I finish mine to the best of my limited ability he leans in brushing a kiss on my neck. “Looks good.” He says low in my ear.
“Thanks.” I slide a wire under my bowl and move it to the shelf to let it harden. At the end of our class the teacher lets us know that in two days we can pick up our fired and finished pieces.
After a delicious round of chili for dinner, Colin and I spend the rest of the evening snuggled into one another on the couch watching movies and quietly conversing about life and love, because when you stop and look around this life is pretty amazing. When we finally crawl into bed he takes mine hand in his and rests them over my heart.
“Feel that?” He whispers in the dark.
“Yes.”
“That’s called purpose. We’re here for a reason.” He kisses me once with tenderness before letting go of my hand and pulling my back tightly to his front. My chest swells with emotion at his words. My brain whirls one thought round and round like a tornado; I’m in love with this man. It scares me to realize how much he’s become mine when I’m not sure how much time I have, knowing that I don’t belong here. I push all my demons down and try to let myself enjoy the feeling of safety and love for the time being.
DAY 27
Elle, Jenna, Ben and I are headed now to Target. We’re supposed to get kicked out of a Wal-Mart per Elle’s list but Target is closer and we all agreed it was basically the same idea. We don't have a solid plan on how to do this but we’re all pretty excited and convinced it will end up being a great story. Elle’s chili was nothing short of amazing, however, chili comes with a written guarantee from me that if I eat it, the next day my ass will fall off and this morning I wasn’t able to make it happen.
When we enter the store Elle grabs a cart and starts pushing it up and down aisles. We’re flying by the seat of our pants here. I’m not sure what will come in handy so we’re all just chucking things into the car. We’re furthest from the restrooms when the pain hits me. No, no, no. This can’t be happening.
“Elle.” I groan. “Uh...I gotta go .” This pain feels different from my normal poop cramps. The peppers in the chili seem to be staging a revolt. My stomach knots in pain making me clutch my gut and double over.
“Are you alright?” Elle asks concerned.
This is every man’s worst nightmare. In some sadistic dash for freedom the peppers rip their way through my intestines, and before I can take a single step Elle’s chili fires a warning shot and I freeze in horror.
“Holy shit Colin!” Elle pinches her nose and her face turns red.
“Dude.” Ben scolds as Jenna just makes an awful retching sound.
We’re in the beer aisle, suddenly trapped in a noxious cloud the likes of which has never before been smelled. I’m afraid to move for fear that more of this vile odor might escape me. I shrug my apology to the three horrified people staring me down. “What?” I say and resume walking to the main one, just as a woman turns down ours.
I don't know why, but I stop to see what her reaction will be to the nasty vapor that refuses to lift. I stand frozen again and watch as she walks into an invisible wall of odor so rancid that all she can do before coming to her senses, is stand there blinking in horror. Without warning me, Elle, Jenna and Ben begin to laugh. Big Mistake.
It's hard to keep things clenched while laughing. With each burst of laughter an explosive fart bursts out of me. Suddenly things are no longer funny. “No!” I scream. “It’s coming!” Ben’s laughter roars as I race towards the bathrooms, praying that I make it before the grand assplosion takes place. I’m prepared to do whatever it takes, push women and children out of my way to ensure I don't publicly crap my pants. I make it just in time and begin the floating above the toilet seat because my ass is burning so bad, explosion.
Thanking God no one came in while I was going I exit the restroom, determined to somehow make Elle not think I’m the most disgusting human on earth when a store employee approaches me .
“Sir, you might want to step outside for a few minutes. It appears someone set off a stink bomb in the store.” I can feel my eyes bug out but with everyone waiting just steps away rolling with laughter, I can’t help but join them, causing a follow up fart to escape. The employee takes one sniff, jumps back pulling his shirt up to cover his nose and, points at me accusingly and backing up a step.
“IT'S YOU!” He shouts running off.
“Colin.” Elle wheezes trying to catch her breath. “Oh my god. I’m going to die of laughter.” Her eyes are watering and mascara streams down her face.
“Holy shit dude. This is seriously the best day of my life!” Ben squeals as employee returns with the manager in tow.
“Sir. We’re going to have to ask you to leave the store.” The manager states while trying not to gag.
“What?” I can tell my expression is nothing short of horrified.
“And please, don’t come back.” He waits as I glance over to everyone and then points to the door. “Out. Now.”
Elle, Ben and Jenna follow a good distance behind me as we exit the store probably in fear that my bowels will kill them if set off again. I am utterly horrified that my ass just got us kicked out of Target. I can feel my cheeks redden with every step I take.
“You were right.” Elle quips trying not to laugh.
“Yup, funniest, most amazing best story ever out of this!” Jenna bellows before doubling over in another fit of laughter. I slap my face and dragging my palm down it.
“I am never eating your chili again.” I shoot Elle a pointed look. The three of them stand there choking on their laughter and clutching each other for stability at my expense.
“I’m ready to go home.” I deadpan.
***
It took a bottle of Pepto Bismol and a lot of coaxing that I didn't think he was disgusting before Colin calmed down enough to enjoy the rest of our day after the Target incident.
It had taken me by surprise when Colin brought up the fact that my month was almost up. He held me close and asked me hesitantly what I was doing after the rental was up. I’ve thought it over a lot and talked to Jenna about it. I want to stay. When I told Colin that I plan on staying he was overjoyed going on about how relieved he was to hear me say that.
I explained that I needed to find an apartment and a job and I might stay with Jenna until I could find something suitable. His face had dropped slightly, surprising me, sure we spend our days mostly together but he couldn’t think that we’d just move in together after a month. He offered his place up until I found a place and I told him I’d think about it but I knew that I didn’t want to rush things more than they already were.
As he held me firmly in bed that night my brain went into overdrive thinking about my life. I’ll never go back to Ryan, but there are so many things to fix before I can really settle into my life here. I can't imagine a world without Colin, Jenna and the guys, but they don't know the extent of what I’m up against either. His warm body pressed up against me, warming me. The air all but crackled every time we were near each other. How could I possibly tell him the rest without him thinking I’m insane, without him looking at me differently? Just before falling asleep his fingers had grazed the inside of my wrist and slid up through the palm of my hand until they pushed in between mine and interlaced together while he softly rubbed his thumb back and forth over the knuckle of my thumb. The intimate gesture sucked all the air from my lungs. I couldn't bear to lose him, to have this change in any way.
DAY 28
My eyes flut
tered open as warm soft kisses started at my shoulder blades moving down my spine before ending at the small of my back where the blanket draped across my hips. He made his way back up, following the same path before rolling me to him. His tongue softly pushed past my lips as his knee moved between my legs, pushing my legs apart. He settled himself there and paused. His kiss lights me on fire, and I can't stop from breathing my moan into his mouth.
“Morning babe.” His voice is thick with sleep as he pushes inside of me slowly.
“Morning.” I breathe. Feeling every solid inch of him inside me makes me pulse around him with the need for more. His lips descend on my neck, just behind my ear and a low guttural cry escapes me as he eases in and out. “So wet.” He rasps. “Always ready.”
Wrapping my legs around his hips and pulling him deeper into me as he rolls his hips is too much and not enough at the same time. I can’t seem to ever get him close enough. “More.” I pant. Colin slips an arm under me pulling me closer to him and picks up his pace. It’s wild and unrestrained and I find myself clutching him firmly to keep the rhythm. I can feel the telltale blush spread across my chest just before I come apart around him. I’ve never felt anything more intense in my life. When his body jerked with the force of his orgasm he collapsed against me panting heavily. His hazel eyes stare into mine drinking me in like he’s memorizing every inch of me as he brushes my bangs out of my face. “I love that.”
“What?” I ask.
“You absentmindedly lick your lips when I check you out.” He smirks. “It’s hot.” He dips his head to mine again, brushing a light kiss across my lips before rolling off to the side.
“We should shower.”
“We?” He questions raising his brow at me curiously.
“If you’re up for it.”
“Go!” He hops out of bed racing to the shower leaving me in stitches at his enthusiasm.
Four hours and an intense sparring session at the gym later Colin, Ben, Jenna and I are enjoying the weather, some music and drinks on the patio at my cottage.
“Geez Jenna, I had no idea. I have a really good lawyer if you want to meet with him.”
“Well, he didn't really start stalking me until he noticed Ben around.” She admits. Ben’s hands are clenched in fists as his sides and his jaw ticks as Jenna speaks.
“I don’t care about the whole slashing a tire bit, but I don't think it should be his.” He grinds out.
“Oh stop. He won't do anything to me and you know it. He’s just creepy.”
“I agree with Ben. Why don't you just let us handle creepy ex-boyfriend?” Colin asks.
“Because this will be so much more fun! Right Elle?!”
“Right.” I say flatly. I am all for the slash a tire activity happening, I’m not sure I think Jenna’s stalker ex should be our target. Sure, he’s deserving, but will he retaliate against her if he finds out, is what worries me.
“We won't go until dark.”
Jenna and I take off in Ben’s car around nine and head over to the location of her ex-boyfriends truck. Colin, although irritated that we couldn't just pick a stranger and keep the danger level to a minimum gave us the hunting knife he keeps in his trunk. Jenna parks the car a block away from the truck to keep from getting caught.
“Ok, so I just stab it right?” I ask as we’re crouched behind the truck together.
“I don't know! I’m no expert here.” She whispers back.
Sighing I pull the knife from my coat pocket and unsheathe it. “It’s not going to explode right?”
“Elle...I have no idea. Just do it.”
“I’m scared! You do it!” I hiss.
“It’s your list, I just provided the tire for you. Now hurry up, I have to pee!”
I raise the knife and jab the tire with it. The force of my blow does nothing but bounce the knife back at me. Apparently tire rubber is extremely durable, and takes a lot of force to penetrate. With Jenna chuckling quietly at me I try again stabbing the tire with as much force as I can muster. There's a big hiss and a gust of wind, and then it's over. No pop, no explosion, not much danger and nothing melodramatic as the car sinks a few inches. Jenna and I look at each other as if we didn’t do it right momentarily before I shrug. “I guess that’s it.” We scurry down the street to the car giggling about how lame slashing a tire is and spend the car ride home laughing over the huge let down it turned out to be.
“There really wasn’t much excitement was there?” Jenna snickers.
“I think crouching behind his truck was more exciting than the tire deflating.” I laugh.
“Stupid jerk deserves a flat.”
“Well then, mission accomplished.” I snort.
The guys greet us at the door when we arrive back at the cottage. None of them look particularly happy but relief is etched in their faces when we come through the door. “So?” Ben asks tapping one foot nervously.
“We did it.”
“And...” He goads.
“It was kinda a letdown.” I pout. “Nothing exciting happens when you slash a tire.” I sigh in disappointment. Ben and Colin stare at us a moment before bursting into laughter at Jenna and I.
“What did you think was going to happen?” Colin asks.
“I don't know.... but something! It just hissed and deflated.” I shrug.
“I’m a little sad this list is done. We have some good stories from it.” Colin shakes his head sadly.
“Like your assplosion?” Ben chimes in.
“We agreed never to talk about that again.” Colin spits pulling me into a hug. “Sorry it wasn't as badass as you wanted it to be.” He murmurs in my ear.
“Eh... it’s alright. What do we have for dessert, I’m kinda hungry.” Everyone laughs at my obvious need for sugar before joining me in the kitchen.
Week four gone
“She bought a gun in Somerset.” Mick says.
“This is not good. Not good at all.” Dr. Rand worries.
“Maybe it is. Maybe it saves us having to find her.” Mick snickers.
“Or maybe instead of using it on herself she’ll come after you Ryan.” Dr. Rand quips. I look to Mick, then back to Dr. Rand.
“When she’s back in custody, she’s not getting out. Do you understand?”
“Yes.” Dr. Rand replies. Elle, Elle, Elle you idiot. Registering a gun in your name. How foolish. I’ve got you now.
***
It takes Mick forty-eight hours and a lot of favors but we now have an address. Mick sits across from me waiting for direction. “Hunt her down and get her back to Dr. Rand unless she gives you trouble, then do whatever you have too.”
“Understood.” He clips before pushing out of his chair and striding away.
I drag a hand down my face and look out the window. It’s only a matter of time now before you’re back where you belong. I pick up the phone and call Alister’s bookie.
“I’ll have the money end of next week.”
“You said that last month. Alister’s wants me to remind you that he’s not a bank.”
“End of next week.” I bark into the phone and hang up.
PRESENT
DAY 29
“Pivot! Pivot Elle!” Colin shouts as I continue my combinations on the heavy bag.
We’ve hit the speed bags, double in bags, and tackled the more physical stuff too like pushups and sit-ups already. My energy is waning fast and all I want to do is tell him to screw himself so I can stop.
“Break.” He clips. “Rope...ten minutes.”
I drop my arms and curse at him under my breath before picking up the jump rope and starting. By the time Colin thinks it’s acceptable for me to be done I’m dripping with sweat, feel like throwing up and unsteady on my legs.
“Good job today babe.” He says leaning in to kiss me.
“Yeah, no special treatment here.” I complain making him chuckle.
“What time will you be home?”
“Um,” I say still trying to catch my breath. “I
have two appointments back to back to see apartments but I think I should be back around four or five.”
“Alright, I’ll cook dinner so don't pick anything up.” He instructs.
“Oh really?”
“I have a little surprise for you. I should be home by five thirty.” He winks and turns away leaving me at the entrance to the locker room. By the time I’m ready to leave I’m still grinning like an idiot. I love surprises and I can't wait for Colin’s.
The realtor I met with was pleasant enough but the apartments she showed me were not at all what I was looking for. I had made it clear that I wanted something with an ocean view so that I could still open windows and hear and smell the ocean. Both apartments were further in town with an ocean view from the roof, maybe. They were smaller than the rental cottage too, which isn't a total deal breaker but if I’m setting down roots I want a guest room at the very least. By the end of the second showing I sensed the realtor was frustrated with me. Her heels clack obnoxiously down the stairs and her cheap suit reminds me of something Ryan’s mother would wear. “It’s alright to take our time and find something.” I say calmly. “I’m not in a hurry really so why don't you get back to me this week with some more options.”
“Of course Ms. Darling.” We part ways outside the second apartment with no love lost.
It’s three thirty, Colin won't be home for another two hours but I’m glad. It gives me time to get home, clean up a bit and change for him. I have no idea what he has up his sleeve but I want to look good for it. I can't help but smile as I walk back to the cottage.
I swing the door open walk to the kitchen and put my purse down. The list on the fridge is full of things that have been crossed out. All but one. The last one. It’s not something I can do in a day but it’s definitely happening. I feel it more and more each day. I breathe a sigh of relief and accomplishment at everything I’ve managed to do.