This flash of anger seemed to please him. Was he even listening to her? She couldn’t tell and it made her uneasy.
“And trust me, you don’t want me to be unhappy. It’s not…pretty. The red hair isn’t just for show.”
His gaze was almost caressing as it swept across her.
“Where one comes from is not nearly as important as where one finishes.”
“That sounds like something Evie would have said.”
“Evie?”
“She was one of the people who raised me—one of the many people.”
“You are fond of her.”
It wasn’t a question, but Sara answered. “I was. She didn’t knock me around.”
His brows shot up. “Knock?”
“Hit. Slap. Kick.” She didn’t like remembering it or telling anyone about it, but he needed to understand just how motivated she was.
She straightened up, but kept her chin down so he could see her eyes. “She taught me to never go some place where, say, some leader had to give me permission to do…this. Or tried to change me into something I’m not.”
His lids lowered and he looked…thoughtful. One of his long, white fingers tapped the tabletop. The silence got uncomfortably long before he spoke again.
“Gaedon said you would not change your mind.”
“He’s a smart man.”
“I thought you had…unduly influenced him with some song he heard. Perhaps I would understand if you sang it for me?”
Sara shook her head. “You’ll just have to trust your guy is telling the truth.”
She let him see her eyes, let him see she meant it. No way in hell she was singing that song in front of everyone. Be easier to strip naked.
“You are very…determined.”
“That is probably an understatement.”
He looked at her for another long, somewhat uncomfortable minute. He looked down, one white finger tracing a pattern on the table.
“Did Gaedon tell you what he was doing that day you…met?”
Sara felt uneasy go on steroids. Why the sudden change in direction? She lifted her chin, so he couldn’t read her eyes.
“After his guys shot me with the stun gun, we quit exchanging information.”
“According to our sources, Kalian was going to attack some of our supply transports. I sent him there to protect them.”
Kalian? Sara’s lashes flicked down and then up. Thank goodness he couldn’t see it. Even that small sign would have told him what he wanted.
“And did Gaedon succeed?” She sounded indifferent. Amazing. She was so not indifferent.
“You…distracted him from that goal.”
“Sorry.” She managed a shrug and felt her insides…crack. Her chest felt tight and her heart…hurt.
He smiled. “He did not appear. He seems to have excellent…sources, too, almost as good as ours.”
He looked at Fyn, then back at her.
“But I’m sure you already know that about the Ojemba.”
Again, his gaze flicked in Fyn’s direction.
Sara made her lips curve and her shoulders shrugged again. The moment drew out. What was he waiting for? Or was that hoping for? Finally she arched her brows.
“Was there something else? It’s time for the next set to start.”
He rose and before she could react, got a hold of her hand, his grip surprising strong for a prissy boy. He pressed his mouth to the back, his touch oddly sensual, and then released her.
She tucked the hand behind her and surreptitiously rubbed it against the side of her pants. It took an effort to meet his gaze with continued calm, but she was…motivated. She would not let him see he’d scored a hit if it killed her.
“Until we meet again, Sara.”
Sara jumped up, her heels putting her about three inches taller. He had to look up at her.
She nodded her head once. “Good-bye.”
He smiled, but didn’t speak. His guard spun sharply and formed around him and they all left.
Sara didn’t move. She couldn’t. She felt…frozen. That was actually a good thing. This was not a good time to think. Or act. Or go to pieces.
Gaedon stepped into her line of sight. Sara saw herself hold out her hand to him. It felt like it belonged to someone else.
“Good luck to you, sir.” Her voice wasn’t hers either. She sounded calm. She wasn’t calm. Not even close.
He took her hand in both of his and smiled with great charm.
“You see, he is not as bad as you thought.”
Actually, he might have been worse.
“He needs to work on the clothes. In my culture, they give off a message he might not like.” Her voice sounded light and amused. How was that possible?
His brows arched a bit. “A message?”
“Pretty in pink screams, I like guys, where I come from. Course, maybe he wants to say that? Does he shop on both sides of the street?” Cause he’d been sending some “I like girls” vibes her way.
His eyes widened. “I…no. What he wears is the traditional dress of a Gadi Leader. He wears it because he must.”
“If you’re the leader, can’t you…I don’t know, change that?” She was talking, she was freaking joking. It was good, but it was weird.
“I…suppose he could. Perhaps I will mention it to him.” He grinned. “You’re going to change our culture one way or another, aren’t you?”
“You can’t blame a girl for trying.”
“I would not blame you if you succeeded.”
He turned and left the room. Sara stood there. How long did she have to wait before they’d be out of sight? She tapped into the cameras and watched them head for their ship, the MP’s escorting them, too. And Kilburn. She hadn’t noticed him leave. That was kind of…disturbing. Her vision had gone tunnel.
She heard the guys warming up again. She couldn’t do this. She needed air. She needed to get out. Now.
* * * *
Fyn stared at Sara. Why didn’t she turn around? What had the Gadi leader said to her? She’d seemed fine, had even smiled at him, but now she just stood there staring at the door. Her fists clenched and she bolted out the door. Crap. She shouldn’t be alone with the Gadi still on board.
He went after her, but didn’t catch up with her until she reached her quarters. Inside, he found her sitting on the bed, staring straight ahead, her face oddly blank. He closed the door.
“Are you sick?” He went to sit down by her, but she looked at him, stopping him cold.
He hadn’t been on the receiving end of one of her steely looks since the cave. And that look hadn’t been this steely.
“Who’s Kalian?”
He sank onto the stool. His shoulders heaved once in a sigh.
“He is the leader of the Ojemba.” It was a relief to finally say it. Before she could ask the next question, he added, “For a long time, the Gadi have been weary of fighting. They’ve let the Dusan grow in power, let them pick off a planet here, one there. Only now, when their own planet is threatened, are they worried.”
Sara didn’t speak. She just looked at him.
“The Ojemba was organized to fight back, to fill the void.”
“Why would the Gadi want to stop…them then?” She spoke slowly, as if she were having trouble figuring out what to say.
“The Ojemba have no home world. Supplies are necessary.”
There was a long silence.
“So, why the big secret?”
“What?”
“Why couldn’t you tell me, your wife, and the people who befriended you, who got your ass off Kikk, that you’re Ojemba?”
“The Dusan hunt the Ojemba relentlessly. Secrecy is our only protection.” And it wasn’t a great one.
Her brows. “Who would we tell?”
Fyn sighed, but before he could think of what to say, she went on.
“What did you do for them that you didn’t want me to know?”
He jerked. “It wasn’t that.” It could have
been. Kalian had wanted him to become an enforcer that last time, but Fyn had refused. Kalian had been furious and that’s when he’d given him the assignment to go to Kikk. Had Kalian known it would be a one-way trip? “I did special missions, special assignments, for Kalian.”
“So, when you crashed on Kikk, you were on…assignment. Let’s see if I can guess what you were looking for?” Her lower lip trembled before she could stop it. “You must have thought you hit the mother lode when I dropped in your lap.”
He wasn’t exactly sure what a mother lode was, but he knew what she meant. Her lack of trust was a knife to his heart, but he could not blame her. His story sounded…thin, but she did not know the Ojemba. And he didn’t want her to know them.
“When you fell in my lap, all I could think of was you.” Her brows arched. His hands curled into fists. “When I didn’t return—the Ojemba have no problem leaving people behind. I thought I was done with them.”
“But you’re not?”
He didn’t look away from her. “They aren’t done with me. I’ve been…contacted.”
“How is that possible?”
“One of the Gadi delegation is Ojemba. Kalian has soldiers in many places.” He didn’t want to say it. “He wants you.”
“Well, he’ll have to take a number and get in line.”
Fyn wanted to grab her and shake her. “Don’t underestimate him. What Kalian wants, he gets.”
Sara’s brows shot up. “Not everything. The Dusan are still around.”
Fyn felt his face tighten. “An Ojemba operative penetrated the Dusan high command and assassinated one of the ruling inner circle. It is not an army. It is…covert.” He remembered the word she’d used on the planet. “In my time with them, we have caused serious damage to the Dusan. It is possible we stopped several worlds from being invaded. Xever would give as much for Kalian as he’d give to get you.”
“How did the operative get in and out?”
“He did not get out.”
She paled. “So he sends his men to die while he does…what? Who is he? Where is he?”
“To my knowledge, no one knows who he is.”
“You trust him, but he doesn’t trust you? Not impressed.”
“He has survived to keep the fight alive.”
“Okay, he’s good, but if we’d known, you could have kept out of sight. The Old Man asked who the major players were. I’d call Kalian and the Ojemba very major.”
“I took an oath, a blood oath, never to reveal my association with them for any reason. Would you have me break my bond?”
For the first time since he’d come in, she looked away.
“I took an oath, too.” Her voice was low. “I have to tell the colonel.”
Now she looked at him, her eyes brightened by tears.
“No.” He shook his head.
“I have to. I could be charged with treason—”
“I’ll tell him.” Now he couldn’t tell her that was already the plan. Why should she believe him? He heard her voice again. The sunshine soldier. It wasn’t just his oath to the Ojemba that had driven him since Ionia fell to the Dusan. He’d made a promise to himself, to Fiona, to all of Ionia. At the time, the Ojemba seemed the only way to fulfill that oath.
It wasn’t Sara’s fault he’d let himself get distracted. All she’d done was be herself…be impossible to resist. She had his heart, she always would, but his mind, his body, his life if need be, belonged to this galaxy until the Dusan were defeated. He was not a sunshine soldier.
He’d learned much from his time with her people. He knew that Kalian’s way was not the way to succeed. He wasn’t fighting to win either.
He wanted to fight side by side with these people. He wanted to fight with people who believed in victory. He hoped he got the chance. But if they wouldn’t let him, he would find another way.
He hoped they wouldn’t get in his way. They hadn’t yet seen what he could do.
He stood up. “I should go.”
She didn’t look up, but as he turned away from her...
“Fyn.”
It was a cry that spun him around.
She hurled into his arms. Her mouth found his and clung. She tasted of good-bye. He pulled her arms from around his neck and stepped back, then turned and left without looking back. Even when he thought he heard a sob.
His payment to the gods had come due.
Seventeen
Dying was easier than this.
Sara pushed herself up off the bed, wiping away the few tears she couldn’t stop from running out her eyes. She didn’t have time…the colonel would want to see her after…
Her intercom buzzed. Not yet please…
“Donovan? Where the hell are you?”
Foster.
“I’m sorry, sir. I’m not feeling well. Been a…long day.”
And it wasn’t over.
He sounded disappointed, but let it go.
Sara showered, wishing she had more time under the heated stream. She put on her uniform and sat down to wait for the summons. Every time her thoughts veered toward Fyn, she’d yank them away. It wasn’t as if she didn’t have piles of other stuff to think about.
Solve a problem that can be solved, don’t worry the ones you can’t do anything with, girl.
Thank you, Evie.
The outpost. The ships down there. Would Briggs be able to take the tech and combine it with their stuff? Though the ships might as well be back in the Milky Way with the Gadi parked out there.
This is not your proper setting.
That was kind of an odd comment. Looking back, it almost seemed as if Helfron was…marking time.
Sara’s spider sense began to tingle. Something was wrong with the scene. She replayed it, but more slowly. She had walked over to the leader’s table. His guard was standing behind him. She sat down and they made a circle around them. Six guys who needed some tips.
Sara stiffened. When the leader left, there’d only been five guards. What happened to number six? And who had given him the perfect excuse to add more guards?
Bright, Sara, real bright.
Sara wasn’t sure which part of her brain locked down her room. There’d been no sound outside. It wasn’t as if she had a doorknob for someone to turn or rattle. But she felt a…presence. Her spider sense kicked up another notch.
She tapped into the security system and then tried to get into the camera in the hall outside her room.
It was…down.
Okay, that shouldn’t be happening.
Suddenly the room felt really small. A back door would have been nice about now. Or some weapons. All her gear was in the armory.
This was more than a presence. She felt…watched. She picked up a small mirror and pretended to look at her face, but angling the mirror so she could see the vent over her bed.
Eyes. She could see eyes.
Okay, Sara, think. How can you give the alarm?
Well, duh. She reached out with her mind and triggered a fire alarm for her quarters in the ship’s grid. The sprinklers kicked on overhead.
Okay, not her best work.
Outside an alarm started to throb through the ship.
What was that…smell?
Over the patter of falling water, she heard the hiss of gas.
Her muscles began to…stiffen. It wasn’t fear, though her pucker factor was high.
She couldn’t move.
Someone lifted the grille of the vent clear and dropped it on the bed next to her.
No…freaking…way…
* * * *
Halliwell didn’t speak for a long time after Fyn finished. Even worse, he stared at him, his gaze rock hard.
Don’t disappoint me, son. The words echoed inside Fyn’s head.
Fyn met his look without looking away or flinching. He deserved it. In some ways, this was harder than facing Sara. He would have liked to be respected by him. This is what he’d thought Kalian was, when he first joined the Ojemba.
“D
oes Donovan know?”
Fyn nodded. He didn’t really want to talk about Sara. He knew he’d lost her.
“And you’re still standing? She must really love you.”
He hadn’t thought about that. Made him feel a little better. Not much, but a little. He still couldn’t see how this could work out.
“You must still feel some loyalty to them?”
“I took an oath when I joined them. I try to keep my word.” It was the only thing he had left.
“Are you going to obey Kalian’s order and deliver Donovan?”
Fyn jerked. “No.”
“Then you’ve already broken your oath. You may still have a foot in that camp, but the rest of you is here.”
The truth of his words was almost a blow. So he didn’t even have his word.
“What will Kalian do when you don’t follow his order?”
“He’ll order my death.” If he hadn’t done that already. “And launch a mission to snatch Sara.”
Fire flashed in his eyes. “You think he could get men on my ship?”
Fyn looked at him. “They’ve already gotten one man on your ship.”
“Big difference between dropping a note and taking a captive. And we both know Donovan won’t go quietly.”
He had to make him understand the danger. “Kalian has a gas. First it immobilizes, so the target looks sick, but can’t talk or fight back. That lasts long enough to move them to a secure location. Then it knocks them out. Even if they come to before reaching a final destination, they won’t be able to move or make a sound. The transport container is very secure.” He stared at the colonel. “Two ways to deliver the drug. As a gas or as a powder. She drinks a bottle of water after each set. Or knock on her door and spray her in the face. Walk her to the Gadi ship. I’m guessing Kalian probably already has a container somewhere on there and a plan to get her off and on another ship.”
Halliwell punched the intercom. “I want a security detail to Captain Donovan’s quarters now and keep an eye on the security cameras in the corridor outside her room. Anything moves, call me.”
He stared hard at Fyn as several long minutes ticked past. Finally he started to say something, but the intercom interrupted him.
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