by Peggy Bird
“You know I don’t drink. And what do we have to talk about? You left. I stayed. That about says it all.”
“It’s important, Shannon. I know I wasn’t fair to you when I left. I want to start over, do it right this time.”
“Just like that, I’m supposed to pick up where we left off when I haven’t heard from you in a year?” She grabbed her messenger bag and rain jacket. “I don’t think so, Jeremy.” She tried to move past him but he blocked the doorway. “Do I need to call security and have them remove you from the building?” she asked.
“Is this how you treat the citizens of the city of Vancouver?”
“Don’t worry about it. You don’t live in Vancouver.”
“Yes I do. I moved from Portland so I can be close to you. To make it up to you for what I did to hurt you.”
“You’ve got one hell of an ego. But don’t worry. You’re off the hook. I’m fine. Except I can’t get out of my office to go home.”
“I learned a lot about myself spending all that time alone. I learned we belong together, Shannon. Haven’t you always felt that, too?”
“Are you okay, Shannon?” Powell’s voice cut into the conversation. “Do you need security?” She was standing directly behind Jeremy, her cell phone in her hand. The expression on her face would have made a boulder disintegrate into gravel.
“No, thanks, Powell. Jeremy was leaving, weren’t you?”
Jeremy hesitated for a moment but, bookended by two women who seemed determined to face him down, he finally moved. “I’ll leave. But I’m not giving up. I know now what I need. You. And I won’t stop trying to convince you I mean it. No matter what it takes.” He strode toward the elevator leaving the two women to gape after him.
“What the hell is he talking about?” Powell asked.
“Apparently he believes I suffered when he left, and he’s graciously offered to make up for it,” Shannon said. “I’m not sure what to do about it. Maybe I should sit down and talk to him, just to clear the air.”
“Or maybe you need a restraining order.”
“Like for stalkers?”
“Yes. If he won’t go away that’s exactly what he is.”
Shannon shuddered, knowing what Powell had gone through a couple years before. The story she’d told about black eyes and sprained wrists, slashed tires, and break-ins was horrific. In Powell’s case, it had been her ex-husband. It had required the intervention of law enforcement, and when the police couldn’t stop him, a move from Colorado to Washington State to get away from him. “This is nothing like that. He caught me off balance, that’s all. I don’t think he’s dangerous. More like annoying. Actually, I kinda feel sorry for him. He looked so pathetic.”
“He was standing too close to you and he sounded way too demanding. You need to watch your back, Shannon. From what I heard of the conversation, I don’t trust him.” Powell grinned at her friend. “On the other hand, maybe you can find someone who’ll want to watch your back for you. Maybe a guy who’s hot and sexy. Know anyone like that?”
All the way home, Shannon thought about Powell’s advice. A restraining order. It sounded like something out of Law and Order: SVU. She didn’t think it was necessary. But then, she would never have thought she’d see Jeremy again much less have him suddenly appear and ask to get back together.
She didn’t understand her ex. When they were together he’d hardly thought they were the soul mates of romance novels. She didn’t think forever had been on the table for either of them. Granted, her father had met him once, and on the basis of a short acquaintance, seemed to assume he was the one for her. But no one else did.
No question she’d been hurt when he left, but that was as much because of the way he left than anything else. He’d disappeared while she was at work one day, leaving no trace, not taking the few things he’d left at her house. He hadn’t even left a note. It scared the bejesus out of her worrying about him until he texted her a few days later to say he needed space and was off to hike the Pacific Crest Trail. He explained it wasn’t her; it was him. He’d been rude; he’d scared her, and she had to admit, her pride had been dinged a bit by the way he’d ended things. More than anything, he’d confirmed what she’d always thought anyway—she had lousy luck in dealing with the opposite sex.
Maybe though, for the sake of closure, she should see him again. Not to revive what she was sure was no longer there, but to put it firmly in her past. She made herself smile when the thought occurred she could thank him for leaving in such a way that she was angry at all the males on the planet, making her unattached when Leo came along.
On the other hand, if Powell was right, if she’d seen something Shannon had missed in Jeremy, if he was capable of doing something like stalking, maybe encouraging him wasn’t such a good idea. Shannon tried to get the idea of being stalked out of her mind, but she couldn’t. Powell had spooked her.
Her friend’s warning stayed with her as she fixed and then ate dinner, while she loaded the dishwasher with her breakfast and dinner dishes. She tried to settle in her living room with a book, but she couldn’t concentrate. Every sound—and the old building she lived in made lots of creaky noises—made her think someone was outside on the porch, at her back door. She jumped at the wind, started when the rain changed directions, read the same page five times interrupted by the groans and moans of the house or by her neighbors making noises. At the rate she was going, she wouldn’t get much sleep. Something had to be done or she’d be a total mess by morning.
She wished she had a dog. Walter would have been good company tonight. Wait. That’s what she needed—company. She started to call Powell but couldn’t push the button to ring her. If Powell came over, she’d make her more nervous about Jeremy being a stalker and she needed someone to tamp down the feeling, not make it worse. Then she had an idea. Walter’s owner.
Leo answered on the second ring. “Hey, Shannon. What’s up?”
“Nothing. I needed to … wanted to … thought maybe we could talk.”
Leo paused for a moment before asking, “Are you okay? You sound, I don’t know, different. Upset maybe.”
“No, I’m fine.”
“You sure?”
“Well, maybe not exactly fine.” She was silent for a bit, trying to find the words to explain why she was freaking out. “Jeremy, my ex-boyfriend, came to my office to ask me to have a drink with him.”
“He didn’t remember you don’t drink?”
“I guess not. I don’t know. That’s not the point, though. He’s back in town and he’s discovered what he needs from life. Me. He wants us to get back together.”
Chapter Ten
What the fuck? Get back together with her old boyfriend? Leo heard the words but didn’t want to believe them. She couldn’t, could she? Or could she, and the tense, upset tone of her voice was because she was going to tell him so?
He hesitated for a moment before saying, “Okay. He wants to get back together. What do you want?”
“I don’t want to get back with him, but I kinda feel bad about the way I ran him out of my office today. He’s not a bad person. Although Powell says she doesn’t trust him. She told me to get a restraining order because she thought he was verging on being a stalker. She scared me more than he did.”
Leo exhaled the breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding before saying, “Walter and I are on our way.”
“You don’t have to come over here. I’ll be fine. Just talk to me.”
“You’re not fine, and you need some company. We’ll be there in fifteen minutes.”
Leo didn’t register how relieved he was Shannon wasn’t interested in her ex until he had loaded Walter into his truck and was on I-5 headed for Vancouver. It took that long for his shoulders to slump back into their natural position and the muscle at the back of his neck to let go of the knot he’d felt appear when Shannon told him her ex wanted her back.
He’d thought about her a lot since their weekend together. Her intelligence
and sense of humor. Her eye for art and her enthusiasm for her city. The way she loved Walter and how Walter loved her. The fireworks he created with her in bed.
He’d already planned out the coming weekend. And the one after, and the one after, on into the summer. Not to mention looking forward to working on the installation for the Fourth together.
None of what he planned included an ex-boyfriend hanging around.
When Shannon opened her front door, he could see on her face the strain he’d heard in her voice. “Jesus, baby, you look so worried.” He took her in his arms and held her until he felt her relax against him.
“I shouldn’t have let you do this, but I’m so glad you’re here.” She sounded like she was on the edge of tears, holding on by a thin thread.
“Let’s sit down. Tell me about it.”
She sat in Leo’s arms with Walter’s head on her thigh while she related the story of Jeremy’s unexpected visit. By the time she’d finished, she was noticeably more relaxed.
Until the doorbell rang and she startled at the sound.
“Are you expecting someone?” Leo asked.
“No.” She stood to go to the door but he stopped her.
“Walter and I will get it. You stay here.”
It was a man, a bit shorter and younger than he was, tan, fit looking. “Can I help you?” Leo said.
“Sorry I must have the wrong place. I was looking for Shannon Morgan. I guess she moved.”
“Who’s looking for her?”
“I’m an old friend, Jeremy Vincent.”
“You’re her ex-boyfriend and she doesn’t want to see you.”
“Oh, then you know her.” He looked past Leo, searching the room for Shannon. “And she’s here, isn’t she?”
“She doesn’t want to see you,” Leo repeated.
“You’re mistaken. I hurt her when I left on my vision quest, and I want to make it up to her. You can’t keep me from seeing her.” Jeremy began to push his way into the house but was stopped by a growl from Walter.
“Even my dog knows she doesn’t want to see you,” Leo said. “Leave before I call the police.”
Jeremy stepped back out of range of Walter’s mouth. “Shannon,” he yelled, “I’ll be back. I have to see you.”
Leo slammed the door and threw the deadbolt.
Shannon was shaking when he sat down next to her. “I don’t know what to do,” she said. “Do you really think he’ll turn into a stalker?”
“I don’t know, baby, but I think you better be extra cautious for a while until you can figure it out.” He stroked her hair and kissed the top of her head. “You can come stay with Walter and me if you’d like.”
“Let me think about it.”
“Don’t wait too long. I don’t know him well enough to know if he’s a threat, but I do know you’re upset by it and I don’t like to see you like this.” He took his arm from around her. “Why don’t I make you a cup of tea while you stay here with Walter?”
“Yes, please. There are some chamomile teabags in the cupboard to the left of the sink.”
A short time later, Leo brought two steaming mugs to the living room.
After finishing most of her tea, Shannon put the mug on the coffee table. She yawned. “It must be working already.” She yawned again. “All of a sudden I’m awfully tired.”
“Adrenaline let down. Let’s get you to bed.” Before she could say what he was sure she was thinking, he added. “To go to sleep, nothing more. I’ll stay until I’m sure you’re asleep and then Walter and I’ll leave.”
“Thank you, Leo. A friend like you is what I needed tonight.”
He finally learned what she wore to bed when he wasn’t there—a cute little tank top and pajama bottoms that hung from her hips. Too bad sleep was the only thing on the agenda for the night. She looked sexy as hell. But sleep was what she needed, so he lay beside her on top of the comforter, fully clothed, rubbing her back until she drifted off.
On his way home, what she said finally made its way into his consciousness. Friends? She thought they were friends? He already knew he wanted more. The question was, did she? And if she was reluctant, what could he do to convince her it was okay to want more, too?
• • •
Shannon woke to a bright shiny object in the sky, something she hadn’t seen in days. The sunshine pouring down elevated her mood considerably. In the light of day, Jeremy didn’t seem like much of a problem after all. Leo and Walter had made the point she’d moved on, had someone else in her life, and didn’t want to see him. Surely Jeremy understood and would back off. She had let the sudden appearance of her ex and Powell’s dire warnings make her jumpy. There was nothing to be afraid of.
Powell, of course, was waiting for her when she got to work. Shannon reassured her, saying everything was fine. Leo had run Jeremy off. Powell allowed as how Studly-Do-Right got better and better with each passing day. Shannon had to agree.
There was nothing more from Jeremy until Friday when a bouquet of flowers was delivered to her office. The accompanying note apologized and asked for a chance to start over. He called an hour after the flowers were delivered, but she was in a meeting. He left a message on her voice mail with his new phone number.
Shannon donated the flowers to a colleague who was having a birthday party for his wife on Saturday and ignored the request to call back. Even if she’d wanted to talk to Jeremy, her meeting had run late and she wanted to get things cleaned up at her desk so she could get out. The backpack in the car with what she needed for the weekend with Leo was waiting.
• • •
When she got back from Portland on Sunday, Shannon found a note taped to her front door. It was another apology from Jeremy. He promised not to bother her again but asked once more for her to call.
She tore the note in half and dumped it in the recycling.
In only a month, she had gotten closer to Leo than she’d been in almost two years of being with Jeremy. The contrast between the two men couldn’t have been starker in ways both big and small. In the past weekend alone, she’d laughed with Leo more than in the whole time she’d been with Jeremy. Leo put her needs and interests on a par with his, often ahead of his. Jeremy never had. Even now, he wanted to get back with her because he had decided it was what he wanted and needed. He’d never mentioned and certainly didn’t seem to have considered what she wanted.
Leo accepted who and what she was without question. For heavens sake, he’d sought out something special for her to drink when they had dinner at her house. Jeremy seemed to have forgotten she didn’t drink alcohol.
There were a dozen more differences. It was a no brainer. She had no interest in going back to what she’d had—or realized now what she hadn’t had—with Jeremy.
Over the next couple of weeks, Jeremy kept his word, sort of. He left a note at the reception desk in city hall a couple times saying he was checking in to see how she was. And he sent a box of what he said were her favorite chocolates on what he said was the anniversary of their first date. It was the wrong day and he had sent his favorite candy, not hers. Leo wanted her to report her ex—who he called “a spineless, sotted shit of a man”—for stalking, but she didn’t feel stalked so she didn’t. Jeremy wasn’t showing up at her work or home unannounced. But Leo insisted the messages and gifts could be interpreted as stalking.
When she said she had a slight twinge of guilt about the way she’d brushed Jeremy off without any consideration of how he might feel, Leo thought she was being much too generous about someone who didn’t deserve her.
It was the only thing they disagreed about and even then, not violently.
The pattern they’d begun in April carried them into May—one weekend at her place, the next at his. When they were in Vancouver, they went to First Friday art openings and took Walter to Frenchman’s Bar so he could splash in the still chilly waters of the Columbia River. When they were in Portland, they biked on the East Esplanade along the Willamette and went to
hear local musicians play. Shannon was sure she’d look back on the spring she met Jeremy as the best one of her life.
Even her job seemed more settled. She’d seen the department’s preliminary budget for the year, and in spite of her fears, her job was still there. There were more rounds of negotiations to go but so far, other than the fact she wouldn’t be getting a merit raise, it looked all right.
She should have known it was too good to last. The other shoe dropped just after Memorial Day when Marty Morgan showed up on the doorstep of her home.
She was sure the shock she felt was visible on her face. “Daddy. How did you find … what are you … ?” She couldn’t seem to finish a sentence. She was too busy trying to decide whether she should throw her arms around him and hug him or slam the door in his face.
“Oh, sweetheart. I could find you anyplace. You’re my daughter.” He had a huge grin on his face, the one he always had when he dropped back into her life. The one he also had on his face when he walked away. “Aren’t you going to ask me in?”
“I was just on my way out,” she lied. She hated herself for it, but she was caught so off-guard by his appearance, she wanted some time to collect herself before she talked with him.
His quick once-over, she knew, saw nothing but ratty jeans and an old sweatshirt. “Must not be important. You’re certainly not dressed nicely.”
“Meeting a girlfriend for coffee and I’m late. Maybe we can get together later this week. Are you here for long?” She knew she sounded uptight, but she didn’t want to deal with him right now.
“I’m here for a while. I want to catch up with you. It’s been too long. How about dinner on Friday? I have a couple important things to talk to you about.”
“Dinner? Okay, I guess. Where? What time?”
“How about the restaurant right down the street from you? Is it any good? Do you like eating there?”
“The Grant House? I like it all right. But I need to eat early. I have plans for the evening.” It was her weekend in Portland with Leo, so she’d have to skip dinner with him and arrive late. But she had no intention of missing out on any more of their weekend other than that.