by Tijan
“Do you talk to Morgan regularly?” Some guy was recording this. He got in front of the bike. “Was it love at first sight?”
“Move!” I barked out, turning the engine on.
He didn’t, but I started edging out. When I was two feet from hitting him, he finally moved.
The cameras were still rolling. The flashes kept going. So did the questions. They were talking to me as if they knew me, as if I were their best friend, as if they knew who Morgan was. They knew nothing, and I leaned forward, zooming down the street.
Cheryl had her hands tight around my waist, but I wasn’t thinking of my sister-in-law or even my brother.
I understood Morgan in that moment, when she would kick Shiloh into a dead sprint.
She was racing away from the world.
Cheryl was quiet when I pulled up to her parents’ house. She climbed off, handing me the helmet. I thought she’d go in right away, and I moved to start the bike again, but she didn’t. She half-hugged herself with one arm and tilted her head to the side.
“I stopped watching television after Kyle died, because . . . well, you know.” She glanced at her house, tugging on her scarf. “When you left for that movie, it faded away and my mom told me I could start watching television again. It was on EGossip Tonight. It’s on all the blog sites too.”
There it was again. Morgan and me.
I started to feel the same irritation I felt with anyone trying to pry into my business, it was gut instinct. But this was Cheryl. She had no angle. She just cared.
I forced my hands off the handles but kept them in my lap.
Cheryl could take an hour or two or three to say whatever she wanted. I would wait.
“I know how you hate being told your own gossip.” A fleeting smile flared and vanished behind a cough. “I just wanted to let you know that if you wanted to talk, I’m here if you need me too.”
“Thank you.”
She was studying my face and laughing a bit nervously. “And I can tell you don’t want to talk about her at all.” She gestured to me. “I forget sometimes how much you and Kyle look alike. He always got the same expression.” She quieted and then gestured behind her. “I should head in.” She started to edge backward, stopping halfway to her door to say, “I mean it, Brody. If you need something, I’m here. I really am.”
I nodded. “Thank you, Cheryl.”
She gave me a small wave before unlocking the door and ducking inside.
I got back on my bike and raced away feeling something fixed inside me, and because I was missing my woman, I imagined her running next to me on Shiloh.
Morgan
From where I was lying on the rock, I could hear the engine of a motorcycle driving along the road beneath me.
One, no—two.
Wait.
More engines sounded.
I rolled over and saw a whole train of motorcycles weaving through the mountains.
I was high enough that I doubted they could see me, but I recognized that these guys came through the mountains once a year. I rolled over and propped my head up, resting my chin on my hands.
I counted thirty before there was a small break and another group sped into view.
I swung my legs around so they were hanging off the edge and sat there comfortably perched. The wind rose and slid across the back of my neck, picking my hair up. When an eagle flew below me, a thrill skittered over me.
Halfway across the nation was Brody. He’d be in his home or some building surrounded by similar houses or other buildings. I didn’t understand it, but I knew people enjoyed city living. They enjoyed living near other people.
Other people brought problems.
They brought hurts and aches and eternal sadness.
I tipped my head back and drank in the mountain air.
A movement caught my attention, and I looked down.
The motorcycles had pulled over. People were running on the street, some running in the middle of the road even. Then a few began waving their arms in the air.
I frowned, looking farther down the road, but there was nothing there. Reactions like this usually meant they saw a moose or bear. But no, the herd would’ve sensed another animal like that. And the horses were hidden from the road, so it wasn’t that.
I stood, walking closer to the edge. Maybe I wasn’t seeing the animal, but they began waving their arms faster and more franticly.
They were waving to me.
I cocked my head to the side, and it clicked. They thought I was going to jump.
Oh!
I shook my head and waved as I backed away. I didn’t want to attract attention. They would break off from the road and start through the woods. They’d get hurt or lost. I had to leave before they did any of that, but as I climbed back down to where the herd was, I heard their shouting. It was growing. I heard tree branches breaking.
They had moved into the woods.
The stallion’s head lifted, but there was no decision to be made. He began off, and the rest of the herd slowly followed. A few mares had foaled late, so the small colts were jumping all around. One saw me and started to charge. He was only a day old, so his feet folded underneath him and his head took a nosedive.
I just laughed, stepping over him and walking to meet Shiloh. She was already coming over to meet me. Shoal was right next to her, and after I climbed up on Shiloh, she started toward rest of the herd.
When we couldn’t hear those people anymore, all seemed right again.
The only thing that would have made it better was if Brody were with me.
But I didn’t want to think of him or the way his arms felt around me. That brought feelings I never used to experience before. They filled my head, gave me confusing thoughts, so instead, I bent forward and rested my cheek against Shiloh’s neck. I let her steady everything for me like she always did.
When I walked to the main house, I didn’t know how much time had passed since I’d last been there. I didn’t think it was a month, that felt too long, but the nights were getting chillier. The days were beginning to shorten, so I knew we were nearing to a new season.
“Well, look what the cat dragged in.”
I gave Finn a look. “You’re still here?”
He was just leaving the barn and fell into step next to me. Shoving his hands into his light sweatshirt’s pockets, he let his elbows flap around, nudging me with one. “It’s been over a while. I’m surprised you held out this long.” He looked behind us for a moment. “How do you handle it out there for so long?”
I shrugged. “It’s second nature.” He didn’t know I had clothes and blankets stashed in places out there or that I only came back when I needed things like food or water if I couldn’t find it. I tried sleeping in the barn apartment, but it didn’t feel how it used to. It was cold. It wasn’t mine any longer.
I’d watched the house a few days after Brody left. Peter took off the same afternoon and Matthew went later in the week. Once they were gone, I stopped worrying so much.
But that brought a different question to mind. I looked at Finn. He, Abby, and Jen remained at the house. “Don’t you guys have to work?”
“Ah.” He laughed again. “Yes, we do, but Matthew asked us to remain here in case the movie crew came back. Lucky for us, we can do most of our work online for the company.”
“My life wouldn’t be that different if I had to work.”
“What?” He drew to a stop, turning to face me. “You lie.”
I fought against a grin. “I thought about it before, about working. I would’ve worked with horses somewhere. And if I was poor, I would’ve made enough to buy a camper and park it somewhere and live off the land still.” I tapped him on the nose. “See. I thought of everything.”
“You’re so lucky Matthew set up all your bills. You have no idea what the rest of the world is like.”
Heartache. Harsh. Cold.
I shrugged, starting for the house again. “Does it matter?”
“
Do you realize how big your boy toy is?”
“Huh?”
“Brody. Bad Boy Brody. You remember him? I am pretty sure he was proclaiming his love for you four weeks ago.”
His elbow was coming in to nudge me again, but I slapped it away. “I know who you’re talking about. What do you mean about how ‘big’ he is?”
He stopped, clasping his eyes tightly closed. “Oh, shit. Wrong choice of words.”
I frowned. “What?”
“Yes.” His eyes opened again, and he patted me on the shoulder. “Sometimes I’m glad you aren’t jaded by society.”
“Are you referring to the size of his penis?”
He choked and then bent over to cough it out.
I patted him on the shoulder. “Yes. Sometimes I’m glad you forget I’m not completely stupid.” I paused. “Like the rest of society.”
He laughed.
We were crossing the driveway to the house when we both heard the crunch of tires on gravel.
As one, we turned.
It was a black van, and Finn started cursing right away. Before I could move, he was striding toward them, and when they stopped and the doors opened, he yelled over his shoulder, “Get in the house, Morgan! Now!”
“But—” There were men running at him.
I froze.
I was ten years old again.
They raised their phones and cameras toward me.
Flash!
Flash!
One guy held up a recorder to videotape.
“Morgan!” one yelled, holding out his phone. “Were you just with the horses? Do you and Brody talk every night?”
A second one pushed ahead of the first, his phone out too. “Are you missing Brody? What do you think about the rumors that he’s having an affair with his late brother’s widow? Are you two still together?”
They were moving past Finn, but he struck a hand out.
One reporter ran right into it, clotheslined. He fell to the ground.
The other managed to duck, but Finn rounded, grabbed his shoulders, and threw him on the ground next to his friend.
The guy holding the camera gave Finn a wide berth, and while he didn’t stop videotaping me, he didn’t come any closer either.
Beat red, Finn pointed at him and screamed. “Get the fuck off our property! NOW!”
The clotheslined guy was getting back to his feet, scowling and brushing off his pants. “You don’t have any signs posted. This could be considered a regular road to us.”
“Bullshit.” Finn got in his way, blocking me, but the other two could see. “Get out! Now!”
The door opened behind me, and Abby rushed out. “Finn!”
Jen followed at a slower pace, the landline phone in her hand. She waved it in the air. “I just called the cops, assholes. And we do have a sign posted. No trespassing!” She walked down the steps, still shouting.
“Get off our lands!” Abby put her two cents in as she and Jen both stepped in front of me.
When the reporters and camera guy didn’t have their shot anymore, they grumbled but got back into the van and left.
Finn walked after them, literally escorting them off the land.
Once they were out of eyesight, both Jen and Abby dissolved into uneasy laughter.
“Man.” Abby was shaking her head. “You have no idea the crazy shit we’ve had lately.”
“Stuff like that?”
What did they mean about Brody? He was having an affair?
I knew it wasn’t true, or it probably wasn’t true, but the words burned in my memory.
Finn rejoined us, brushing his hands down his pants like he’d gotten dirt on them. “This has been happening regularly since the movie crew left, but that was the worst so far.”
“They’ve never driven up the driveway before,” Jen added.
“I thought there was a sign down there.”
Finn grunted, eyeing Abby. “I didn’t walk it, but I bet you anything they moved it.”
Jen frowned. “They wouldn’t.’”
He nodded. “Bet you twenty bucks.” He wiggled his eyebrows. “Should we walk down and see?”
“No way.” Abby wrinkled her nose and then remembered I was there. “Oh, Morgan!”
They all stopped and turned to me.
I pointed at the driveway. “What was that about?”
Finn slid his arm around my shoulders, drawing me against his side so he could walk me to the house. “That, my little sister, was the cost of being in a relationship with your celebrity.”
“What?”
Abby, who was walking with Jen behind us, laughed. “Some bikers spotted you a week ago, and it’s been insane ever since. They weren’t looking for you, but with the tabloids and everything, they guessed who you were.”
Finn led the way to the kitchen, taking his arm from my shoulders and pulling out a bottle of wine. He went to the cupboard and pulled out four wine glasses. “It wouldn’t be a big deal, but some of those bikers hang out locally. They got to blabbing at a few bars.”
Jen took the corkscrew from Finn and began to open the bottle. “The press started showing up a few days after the movie crew left. It’s mostly just the gossip sites.”
Finn nodded to me, pulling out a second bottle. “You’re becoming big news. They all want a shot of you.”
“And they just got some.” Abby’s lips pressed into a disapproving line.
“We have people coming tomorrow.” Finn switched to me. “I figured you would be okay with it, but I ordered a big gate to be built at the end of the driveway. No fence will go up, but the gate will be big, and we’ll have cameras installed and more signs posted. If they trespass again, we’ll have proof. We can prosecute.”
Gates.
Signs.
Trespassers.
I swallowed a hard knot, feeling it travel to my stomach.
This was what Brody had been talking about.
He said things would change. He said they would come to me. I laughed him off, thinking no one could find me. I’d been wrong.
They quieted, watching me.
Finn asked quietly, “You okay, Morgan?”
Fear pooled in my chest. “That was it? I mean, no one else will come on our land. Right?”
No one answered, and they all shared a look.
It was worse than I thought.
I shook my head, murmuring to myself, “But why? I don’t get this. Why do they care?”
“Because of Brody.”
I looked up at Jen.
Her eyes were so solemn. “You haven’t been to the outside, but they’re insane about him. It was starting up before Kyle died. Brody had a major movie coming out, and it all hit at the same time. His brother died the night of the movie premiere. That movie hit number one at the box office for six weeks in a row. To be fair, I don’t think Brody even realizes how insane his celebrity status is. He really did become tabloid gold after that. He was sleeping with all these different people. Partying every night. He was getting into fights. When he came here for the movie, it did stop. That was why Gayle got him to do the movie, or part of the reason. She got him out of L.A., but now? After the leaks?” She frowned, looking to Finn, who nodded as if encouraging her. She added, “I’m assuming Shanna leaked everything. There are pictures of you on websites and in gossip magazines. You and Brody are the next it couple.”
I wanted to run.
“No.” I raked my hands through my hair. “This makes no sense. At all.”
“Well.” Jen bypassed her wineglass and picked up the bottle.
“No, no.”
She ignored Abby, taking a long drag from the bottle. “Get used to it. As long Brody is crazy about you, you’re the next big thing.”
Finn took the bottle from his fiancée, shooting her a look. “She’s the next big thing until this movie is done.”
“Finn.”
He handed the bottle to Abby, and she capped off her glass. There were two glasses left on the counter, bo
th filled to the top.
Jen took one.
I could only stare at the last one.
Okay.
There’d been terror and panic in the beginning.
Yes. Brody was a big deal. I knew that. And I was missing him at that moment so much, but in the end, none of this mattered. The movie people, the press, those assholes with the cameras—they’d come back. The movie would get done. And they’d leave after that.
There’d be pictures of me, but eventually, it would all die down.
My life wasn’t that world.
It was here. It was with Shiloh.
No matter what anyone said, they could not trap me.
Finn had been watching me. “What are you thinking, Morgan?”
Abby moved to my side. “Are you okay?”
None of this mattered to me.
I looked up. “I own the land the herd runs on, right?”
Slowly, Finn nodded. “Yeah.”
“Then why should I care about any of this?” I could hide from anyone.
“Morgan, I don’t think you’re understanding what we’re saying.”
I held up a hand, stopping my brother. “No. I get it. I do. They want to take pictures of me. Right?”
“Well, that, and . . .” He shared looks with the other two, and his eyebrows pinching together. He tugged at his collar, looking back to me. “They want to know you.”
“Why?”
“What do you mean, why?”
“Why do they care?”
“Because you’re . . .” His lips pressed together as he chose his words carefully. “Jen? I’m shit at explaining this stuff.”
Jen stepped forward. She stared at me steadily and put it bluntly, “You defy people’s expectations of life just by you being who you are. They want to know what it’s like to be so in tune with a mustang that she turns at the slightest touch from you. They want to know how you got Brody to fall in love with you and what it’s like to be in bed with him. They want to daydream about you and use the idea of you to escape their lives. That’s why people are going to go crazy over you, and if you give them what they want . . . if you let them in, there will be a time when they turn on you. My advice—”
“Jen.” Finn stepped next to her.