by JS Taylor
“That’s bullshit!” I spit. “Tammy’s had three boyfriends in her whole life, and you know it.”
Dez shrugs. “Tammy grew up with the same people I did. No-one could say any different, if some boys were to come forward.”
I feel my body collapsing in on itself. Because he knows that I won’t risk Tammy. That whatever he wants, he’ll get.
I’m appalled at my powerlessness. But I know Dez is cruel enough to carry out his threat.
“Get out of the show,” he says. “I don’t want you on it any more. As your manager,” he adds with a sneer, “I think it makes you look cheap.”
“I can’t do that Dez,” I say weakly, thinking of how it would devastate Tammy and George.
“Clever girl like you,” he says breezily. “You’ll find a way out of it.”
Dez leans closer, and I flinch.
“And if you’re worried about your friends,” he adds, his mouth close to my ear, “Tammy will be a lot more upset to find out what the newspapers are saying. Believe me.”
Suddenly his hand shoots out and grabs my neck.
I try to scream, but the grip on my throat stifles me.
“Get… Off…” I whisper. My hands scrabble at the grip on my neck, but it’s like his hand is made of iron.
For a shocked moment I think he really will strangle me right here in the house. Then his hold loosens ever so slightly. Enough to let a thin shuddering breath through.
“You’ll meet me to talk about your contract,” he says, “Tomorrow. Nice and early. Nine in the morning. At the Jugged Hare.”
His grip tightens again and I nod desperately. I know the pub. It’s a low-life strip bar he took me to once. A place where Dez does all his shady deals.
“Remember Summer,” he whispers evilly, as I gasp for air, “you’re nothing without me. If you cross me it’s not just your friends who’ll get hurt. So be a good girl and do as you’re told. Don’t try anything clever, and come alone.”
He releases the grip and throws me back onto the bed. I sprawl on the covers, choking.
Through the spots in front of my eyes I see Dez turn and leave the room, but not before giving me one last pitying glance.
“And if you ever see Adam Morgan again, I’ll kill you both,” he concludes.
The door slams, and I wait with my breath held until I hear his footsteps on the stair, and the Sing-Win door close.
Only then do I let out a full breath, and let the tears flow.
Chapter 10
I wait a full hour, until I dial Adam’s number with a shaky hand. I’d hoped I’d calmed down enough to sound normal. But as soon as I say ‘hello’ Adam is onto me.
“Summer, what’s wrong?”
His words come fast and anxious. I guess my cheerful telephone voice still didn’t fool Adam.
“Nothing,” I say, trying to sound upbeat.
“Why weren’t you answering my calls?”
“Um. I was just rehearsing,” I say. “I had the music loud. I couldn’t hear you.”
Adam breathes out.
“Don’t do that to me baby, ok? I worry when you don’t answer the phone. Are you sure you’re all right?”
I feel tears rising to my eyes. Everything Adam says sounds so caring. I can hardly stand it. Especially knowing what I’m about to do.
“I’m fine,” I insist.
“Ok.” He doesn’t sound convinced.
“Hey, can you send my Sing-Win contract over?” I ask. “No reason to bring it in person. Just email it.”
There’s a pause.
“Why?” Now there’s full on suspicion in Adam’s voice.
“I just wanted to take a look at the terms,” I say, praying I sound casual.
Over the last hour I’ve formulated something of a plan.
Maybe I can use my Sing-Win contract to stall Dez. I have no intention of passing up Sing-Win and going back under his management. But I need something to convince him I’m taking it seriously. To stop him fulfilling his threat to Tammy.
Perhaps there’s something in the Sing-Win contract which will give Dez pause for thought. Certainly he’s not the greatest with paperwork. Complex legal terms might buy me some time. If only I can find the right ones.
“Summer, what’s wrong?” Adam’s voice is authoritative now.
“I told you. Nothing.”
“I can tell when you’re lying. If you won’t tell me over the phone I’m coming over to get you.”
“I…”
“Stay there,” says Adam. “I’ll be ten minutes.”
“No!” I almost shriek the words. “I… I mean. Don’t come over.”
All I can think of is Dez’s threat.
I’ll kill you both.
“I’m in the middle of composing,” I explain weakly. “I just need to be by myself for a bit.”
“Okaaay,” says Adam, sounding confused and worried. “Shall I pick you up later then? For our date?”
“I’m really tired,” I stall, “I think maybe tonight isn’t such a good idea.”
“What’s going on Summer?”
Adam sounds distraught, and my heart jars. I’m sure he’s already planned something amazing for this evening.
“Nothing.” I force the words out. “It’s just… Everything has happened too fast between us. I need some space.”
“Are you saying, you don’t want to see me anymore?” asks Adam.
I close my eyes, trying to drive back the pain. Because I know what I have to say.
I can’t risk Adam.
“It’s for the best,” I say, my voice trembling.
There’s a long pause, and it feels like my heart is breaking.
“Ok,” says Adam, in a dead-sounding voice. “I’ll get the contract sent to you.”
He waits for a moment, and I’m just about to take back everything I just said, when he speaks again.
“I’ll always care for you Summer,” he says.
And then the line goes dead.
A wave of terrible hurt and guilt rolls over me.
Nice move Summer. What are you going to do now?
Ok. I try and drive back the tidal wave of emotions. Pull yourself together. You need a plan.
I haven’t thought much beyond getting hold of the contract.
If I can stall Dez then maybe I can… Make it all go away? All I can think of is I need to protect Adam and Tammy.
My phone beeps, and my pulse quickens to see Adam’s name. Despite our conversation, I guess part of me is hoping he’ll see through my lies. But what good would that do? The last thing I want is him in danger.
I open the message, and my heart sinks.
It’s the contract. Sent as an attachment. And a short message.
If ever you want to talk, I’m here.
I’m seized by a pain so tight, my hand goes to my chest. And then I make myself open the contract, and read through the tiny writing on my phone screen.
I’m filled with conflicting feelings as I read it.
At first I see nothing at all helpful. It’s all standard stuff. And as far as I can make out, it doesn’t stop me being bound by my earlier contract with Dez.
Then I spot something. It’s a clause about group musicians.
I scan it slowly. And then I stop.
If a band breaks up, they’re released from their contract.
With my heart pumping, I read it again. I can hardly believe it. But the clause holds. It doesn’t apply to solo artists, who are bound by watertight terms to the full show.
Bands like She’s All That will be instantly out of contract if we break up.
So all I have to do is break the group up.
I let out a strangled sob, and put my head in my hands.
I can’t do it. But I have to.
Sing-Win has handed me the solution. All I have to do is tell George and Tammy I want to go solo. Then I’m out of contract.
This will buy me some time to figure out a way of evading Dez. Right now, it’s m
y only option. And it will mean Tammy and George can stay on the show.
Hardly thinking straight, I grab a pen and tear one of the remaining pages from my notepad.
Then I start to write.
Chapter 11
An hour later, and three redrafts, and I’ve got a letter ready. It’s for Tammy and George, explaining why I need to quit the band and go solo.
I’ve spent a lot of time trying to make it sound realistic. Because I know Tammy will never believe I’d just up and quit.
Then again, the girls both know that I started out solo. So maybe they’ll believe this is the direction I want to head in.
I know they’ll both be angry and hurt. I can’t help that. This is for the best.
But the minute I’ve finished the letter, I have a dramatic change of heart.
I can’t do this to them.
After all we’ve been through, I just can’t do it. I can’t do that to Tammy and George.
So how am I going to stop Dez?
It repulses me just to be in the same room as him. Being back under his management would be like prison. I literally couldn’t stand it. So what would I do? Run away? Hide like before?
I have no guarantee Dez wouldn’t carry out his threats just to be spiteful. Now I’ve seen him in person I have no doubts that he would do something terrible.
He’s a completely different person since I last saw him. When I knew Dez, he dabbled in drugs, but, he was nothing like the scary mess who threatened to kill me today.
I shudder to think of his bloodshot eyes and pale face. Dez always had a menacing edge to him. But it’s spilled over into dangerous. And unpredictable.
Slowly, I screw up the letter.
I’ll find another way.
I need a better plan than this. But what?
The door handle of the bedroom turns, and I look up distractedly. I’m expecting to have to put on a front for George and Tammy.
But instead, Adam is standing in the threshold.
My first thought, is how gorgeous he is. Adam’s piercing blue eyes, and rugged features take my breath away every time I see him. His broad shoulders and muscular body seem to fill the doorway.
Oh no. My second thought is how badly I want to rush into his arms.
“Summer.” His voice is like a command. And in that moment I know. I can’t lie to him. If I had a split second of doubt, the look in his eyes vanquishes it completely.
I sit, held immobile in his gaze.
There’s pain in his eyes, but something else too. Relief? Can he see so easily, that I still love him?
My mind flits momentarily to Dez. To the possibility that he’s watching the house. And Adam is in danger.
You need to lie to him. Tell him to leave.
But the words stick in my throat.
Adam steps forward, and gently tugs the balled up letter out from my hand. I don’t resist. But it causes me pain to have him physically close, and then gone again.
I swallow, remembering the terrible hurt in his voice, when I told him we should stop seeing each other.
Adam unfurls the letter. His eyes flick over the text, and then back at me. Questioning.
I look back at him, but say nothing.
“You want to go solo,” he says finally.
There’s no judgement in his voice. But he looks as though he doesn’t believe it.
I can’t trust my voice not to break. So I only nod, praying my face doesn’t give me away.
There’s another pause. I can’t read his face.
“I think you should,” he says finally.
The relief of his not challenging me, has the opposite effect I’d hoped. I draw in an involuntary gasping breath, halfway between a sob and a sigh.
Adam sits next to me on the bed.
No. I’m not strong enough to resist if you sit there!
My eyes drop to his tattooed forearms. Anything to avoid the magnetism of his blue eyes.
“I’ve always said you should,” Adam continues, “since I first met you. Lisa agrees with me. Your voice is too big for Tammy and George. You end up dumbing down your talent, to fit in with their style.”
My eyes flit uncertainly over Adam’s face. This was the last thing I was expecting to hear from him.
“But I don’t think you should go solo,” continues Adam, “for the reasons you’re doing it.”
I risk a glance at him, and wish I hadn’t. Suddenly I’m falling into that gaze.
Stay strong Summer. You’re putting him in danger.
I swallow.
“What reason is that?” I ask, my voice high and brittle. It sounds like an admonishment, and I expect him to frown. But instead, a gentle smile plays on his lips. Then he’s serious again.
“Because,” he says softly, “your ex-boyfriend is blackmailing you.”
What?
A physical jolt rocks my body.
How could he know…?
“That’s not the reason…” I start to say. But Adam places a finger on my lips. I feel myself pressing a little against it. Relishing his touch.
Stay strong… But the mental resilience is fading.
“I know Summer,” he says gently.
A wave of feelings wash over me. Partially fear. Adam didn’t see Dez. He doesn’t know what he’s capable of.
But mostly, I’m relieved that I don’t have to lie to him anymore.
“How did you know?” I ask finally.
The slight smile is on his lips again.
“You’ve got a singer’s voice Summer,” he says, in his soft Irish lilt. “It carries a lot of emotion. You can’t hide that. Your voice gives you away every time. I knew you weren’t telling me the truth.”
“Oh.” I can’t think of what else to say.
“And,” he adds, shifting slightly on the bed, “if I had been in any doubt, the look on your face when I walked in, told me everything I needed to know.”
I feel my lips parting slightly. Something hypnotic and heavy is in the air between us.
“It did?” I murmur.
He nods slowly.
“You can’t hide it Summer,” he says, “any more than I could hide it from you.”
He frowns. “When two people feel the way we do about one another. Well.”
Adam looks at me in conclusion.
Despite the strange situation, I find myself thrilled by his words.
“But how did you know about my ex?” I say, struggling to get a grasp of what’s happening.
Adam’s expression darkens.
“The boat,” he says. “I knew someone had sabotaged the boat.”
“But you said…”
“I didn’t want to scare you,” he said. “But. I knew something was wrong.”
He rubs the stubble on his chin.
“I asked around, and a few people had seen a shady looking guy hanging around the moorings,” he adds. “From the description he was too old to be some kid. And from what you told me about your ex. Well. Men like that. They tend to have a jealous streak. When you starting behaving strangely, I put two and two together.”
He looks at me, searching my face.
“Are you ok?” he asks. “Did he hurt you? Because if he laid a finger on you, I’ll…”
“I’m ok,” I say quickly, opting not to tell him the full truth. “He’s just… Dez dabbled in drugs when we were together.”
I look down, a little ashamed.
“I was too naïve to realise it,” I add, “but I figured it out in the end.”
My eyes find Adam’s.
“I think Dez is into drugs bad now,” I say, unable to stop the fear creeping into my voice. “I mean. He looks awful. I think he’s honestly gone a little crazy.”
Adam’s hands take mine.
“I think he might do something… Really bad,” I continue, “if he thinks I’m not going along with him.”
“Going along with him how?”
I pause.
“I’m under contract to him,” I
say in a tiny voice.
To my surprise, Adam looks as though he expected this.
“And he wants you to go back with his management?”
I nod, with a half smile.
“Not that it was any kind of management,” I say bitterly. “Mostly he just used me to get into certain venues. So he could do deals.”
Unexpectedly, Adam slides his arms under me, and moves me so I’m sitting across his lap. It feels so warm and safe. He kisses my hair.
“All that’s over with now,” he whispers. “You don’t have to worry about that any more Summer. I’ll take care of it.”
“But you don’t know…”
“What he’s capable of?” rejoins Adam. “Believe me Summer. I know more about bad men than you would ever want to know. Or could ever imagine knowing.”
I let this fact filter through my mind.
“He said, if he saw you and me together…” I begin.
Adam puts his fingers to my lips.
“I can guess what he said,” says Adam. “But Summer. Haven’t you been listening to me?”
He sighs.
“You don’t need to be frightened of anyone or anything,” he says. “I’m here. I’m always here.”
“But what about you?” I say. “What if you’re in danger?”
He gives an amused snort.
“I’ve a lot of practice at looking after myself,” he says. “You never have to worry about me.”
Adam pauses.
“Did Dez arrange to meet up with you?” he asks.
“Yes,” I nod, feeling stupid and guilty.
“Where?”
I hesitate.
“Where Summer?” he sound angry.
“In a club,” I whisper, “in East London. The Jugged Hare.”
He nods. “I know it. And you were thinking of going to that dive? Alone?”
I chew my lip guiltily.
Adam frowns, without waiting for an answer.
“When?” he asks.
“Tomorrow. Nine o’clock.”
Adam’s face is grim.
“At least it will be over with early then,” he says. “I’m coming with you. We’ll sort all this out.”
A surge of fear sweeps through me. Dez is dangerous. I don’t think Adam understands how dangerous.