Return to Love

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Return to Love Page 8

by Yasmin Sullivan


  He was thinking himself in circles and decided to stop.

  It was almost one o’clock, and he wanted to make it an early morning. He got undressed and got in bed—alone. He would be able to figure out the next step after a good night’s sleep.

  * * *

  It took them less than four hours to make it the rest of the way to Charleston. Nigel dropped Michelle off at her mother’s house before three, said hello to his aunt, who gushed over him because of the help he’d been to Michelle, and headed home.

  His mother greeted him at the door with a big hug, pulling his head down to take his face in both of her palms.

  “My baby. Oh, it’s so good to have you home. Come see our son in his new suit,” she called to his father.

  He towered over his mother, who was barely five-three, so it was always odd to him when she called him her baby, but he loved it nonetheless. It let him know that though he had been away, he was home.

  “It’s not a new suit, Mom.”

  “It looks brand-new. Come say hello to your aunt Elizabeth and your cousins and some folks from the church.”

  Oh, lord. This meant that she’d invited people over to see him. In his “new” suit, no less.

  “Where’s the new suit?” his father asked, coming out of the kitchen.

  “Hey, Pop. It’s not a new suit.”

  His father gave him a brief hug, as was his way, and pulled him into the dining room, where people were eating and talking. Like his mother, his father was showing him off to the family and friends. He made sure he had a polite smile on his face and greeted everyone in turn. Secretly, he also wished that Regina was there so that she would be able to see that he wasn’t the same mess-up he used to be.

  “We were worried about you there for a while,” one of his parents’ church friends was saying.

  “He just had to find his way,” said another. “Each in his own time.”

  “Hey, cuz, you hungry? Come get a plate.”

  His cousin Jeremy was just a bit older than he was and could probably see how awkward Nigel felt with people fussing over him. Nigel was glad to have an out and slipped into the kitchen.

  “Hey, Jeremy. Thanks.”

  “Don’t mind them. They just want you—and everybody else they know—to know that you done good. You made it.”

  “I know. I know.”

  But the person he most wanted to know that he’d made it wasn’t there. “You’ve done well for yourself, too.”

  “Thanks,” Jeremy said. “But I was caught up in stuff, as well. I remember you went through it. It makes them even more grateful when you turn out okay.”

  The two men chuckled.

  “If we’d known,” Nigel said, “we could have planned it that way.”

  “Just remember,” his cousin said, “it’s about balance.”

  After he ate, he sat around with his folks and their friends until late into the evening, and after their guests left, he broke out the presents he’d gotten for his parents. His mother got a gold necklace with a heart on it, and his father got a watch for himself and a check for the both of them.

  After helping his mother load the dishwasher and watching some baseball with his dad, he finally headed upstairs to change and get to bed. Going into his room had become something of a shock. His mother hadn’t changed it since he left for college. It still had his sports trophies on the dresser, his old music posters on the walls, his football-themed bedspread on the bed.

  He hung his suits in a closet that still held his high school football jersey and dropped his suitcase on a chest that still held some of his barely used books from his first four years in college.

  He fingered the cover of his text for College Algebra, wondering how he had passed the course. Now numbers were a major part of his life. His transformation had taken him longer than he’d thought, longer than he’d wanted. He’d finished college in a year, but the rest—the professional degree, the bank account, the car, the move back to DC—all that had taken him the better part of the past five years.

  Maybe if he hadn’t waited so long things would be easier now. When his net worth tripled in the past twenty-four months, he had begun to put out feelers for relocation. Then he found out that Regina had been pregnant. It was the news that there was a child that propelled him into real action. The truth was that he didn’t feel he’d made it yet—that he was worthy. He was waiting for that, but perhaps only having Regina would make him feel that way: unbroken.

  Nigel sat down on his old twin bed and scanned the furnishings of his past.

  He had become something very different than this room. He had become grown.

  * * *

  The next day Nigel took his parents, grandmother and aunt out to dinner and would have been content after that to stay home and catch up on some work. Instead, he was heading downtown to meet Jeremy and two of his other cousins and some of their friends at a club.

  “They just want to be nice,” his mother had said. “It can’t hurt to go out for a little while so they know you’re family.”

  He rolled his eyes as he pulled into the lot at the Cheshire Cat. Jeremy clapped his back when he got out of the car.

  “Okay, brother, you need to loosen up—a lot. You ready?”

  In the day, he’d have liked nothing more than partying with the boys, but now, to be honest, he just didn’t know how to anymore. He didn’t go to “occasions” unless business called for it, and now he found himself sitting at a table and watching drinks.

  “Hey,” Jeremy said over the music, “you’re out of practice.”

  “Not in the mood.”

  If Regina was there, he would have had a reason to dance. It might all come back to him. As it was, he had little to celebrate.

  “Aw, what did I expect?” Jeremy teased. “You turned into a nerdy bookworm right before our eyes.”

  “I think you might be right,” his other cousin returned. “Man, you don’t know how to get a life anymore. Come, let us school you.”

  Jeremy got him up and backed him into a woman, giving him a nod and wink. Since it looked like he’d interrupted her, Nigel had no real choice but to ask her to dance.

  After two songs, he waved to her and headed back to the table. One of their group had disappeared, and Nigel asked where he’d gone.

  “His girlfriend is here. We won’t see him for the rest of the night,” Jeremy said.

  Lucky man.

  * * *

  Nigel got home late that night. He’d enjoyed the music, but he wouldn’t be going to clubs with his cousins and friends again on this trip. What the night confirmed for him was that he really was through with the club scene, at least without Regina, and that he wanted her back very much.

  His parents were already sleeping when he got home, because church was the next day. He only had until Tuesday afternoon to spend with them before picking up his cousin, packing her things in his car and making the eight-and-a-half-hour trek back to DC. Come to think of it, he should stop tomorrow and get some more games for Andre. This would be a very long trip for him.

  He got in bed thinking about Regina. Her parents had lived nearby before they’d moved up to the northeast. She’d been in this house, this room; he’d kissed her on this bed. Now the twin box spring seemed small for him, but he’d love to have her there to try to fit them both in. She’d have to be wrapped in his arms for it to work.

  She wanted to be left alone, but as long as there was a chance, he couldn’t leave it alone. When he’d moved back up to the DC area to be near her—near them, he had thought—he’d outfitted everything so that she would see that he’d actually made it. Only now she wasn’t trying to see his life.

  Now they were cut off with no real reason for contacting each other, but he wanted contact.

  He n
eeded a new plan.

  Chapter 9

  Regina kicked off her flip-flops and slipped her feet into black pumps. She tossed the shoes into the backseat, straightened her skirt, grabbed her purse and pulled out her briefcase, the one on wheels. After she pulled up the handle, she checked her hair in the rearview mirror and was on her way.

  She was going to the workshops on starting a small business that she’d found at the community center. In fact, a member of National Bank was supposed to be speaking and staying for consultations, so she and Amelie had decided to look the part. If they were close enough to being ready, they could make a contact.

  She stopped at the registration desk to sign in and get an information packet. When she’d gotten a Danish and coffee from the breakfast table and had finished pinning on the name tag that they’d given her, she headed down the long hall to the banquet room. She found Amelie inside already, and the two hugged. She looked around nervously. It was a large space set up with rows of tables and chairs. And it was full. In a real way, this was their competition.

  Amelie had on a blue linen pantsuit with a white shirt, and her braids were pulled back into a ponytail. She took a second look at Regina.

  “Lord, girl, you look like a lawyer. You clean up well.”

  “I hope it works. Here—” she pulled Amelie down to their seats and opened her case “—let me show you what I’ve done so far.”

  She pulled out books and notes and several folders of paperwork. Then she began walking through the paperwork she’d brought, starting at the top.

  “That’s the proposal you emailed me,” Amelie said. “I’ve read that.”

  “Yes. That’s the three-page version, and this is the thirty-five-page version with your corrections. Here’s the thing I couldn’t scan. It’s a new draft of the loan application. I’ve put sticky notes with my questions and problems on everything. The two main problems are a space and the financial statement. Oh, and there’s collateral. With the old place, we were getting it at such a good price that it became a huge chunk of the collateral. Now, what do we use? All of the estimates we have are for the old space. That would work for a new space too, right? Or not.”

  Regina pulled out one of the books she’d been using. Then she stopped and put it back. “It doesn’t make sense to look at that now.”

  “And we went over all of this on Saturday. Calm down. At worst, we’re just here to get the 4-1-1.”

  Regina took a breath. “I know. I just feel like so much is riding on this.” And it was. If they could get a small-business loan, they could start again. If not... But she felt prepared enough to face people and try to get answers to her questions. It was the first time things felt like they might actually work out since she’d had to move. All they needed was a new space and the loan. Right now, though, Amelie was right—she needed to calm down.

  She took the pad of paper and pen out of the information folder, and readied herself for the first session.

  “This is a totally professional setup,” said Amelie as they looked around.

  “I know. And it’s free. All the speakers are working professionals in the business, and they’re all doing it pro bono.”

  Amelie turned to her. “You’ve done an amazing job putting this application together.”

  “You’ve been helping, too.”

  “I know, but you’ve been leading the charge. I wouldn’t have even attempted it on my own. You’re the one who’s put in the long hours on this. Relax. It’ll work out for us. And thank you.”

  She looked at Amelie’s face, and the sincerity there brought tears to her eyes. It had been a lot of work. If they could start again, though, it would be worth it.

  “No problem.”

  She smiled at her friend.

  The presenters started pulling down the screen on the platform at the front of the room, setting up AV for the morning sessions. That drew her eyes toward the front table.

  And there stood Nigel. He was watching as the screen came down and talking to two of the other people at the head table. A young woman came up to him and handed him some papers. He gave her direction of some kind, and then went back to chatting. After a moment he stopped and went to the AV cart and started doing something with the laptop that was on it.

  Regina couldn’t believe her eyes. She pulled out the final seminar program from the information packet—the version with all the names of speakers and moderators. There it was. Nigel Johns. He was the moderator for the morning sessions and a speaker on both the morning and the afternoon panels. She flipped to the back. The investment and accounting firm of Hoffman, Johnson and Dowd was one of the contributors.

  What was she going to do? He’d insulted her the last time she saw him, and she didn’t feel like sitting under his watchful gaze as the absorbent pupil. She’d since decided that she was done with him for good. She didn’t want to put herself through this.

  She replaced the notepad, pen and program, closed the folder and stood to begin packing up the things she’d pulled out—everything but the paperwork. Amelie would need that.

  “What are you doing?”

  “I can’t stay.”

  “Why? What’s going on? Regina?”

  “I’ll explain later. I just can’t stay.”

  She glanced up and found Nigel’s eyes on her. She pressed her lips together, gritted her teeth and moved more hastily, turning from the table to get the hell out of there.

  Amelie grabbed her arm. “You can’t leave. We start in less than fifteen minutes.”

  “I’m not staying.” She sat for a moment. “Look—everything is in the folders, and it’s all labeled.”

  “Yes, but you’re the one who knows what everything is. You know what questions to ask. I need you here.”

  “All you have to do is take good notes on what they say. I can’t stay for this. I can’t be here with him.”

  “Who?” She followed Regina’s glance to Nigel. “Oh. That’s the guy who came to see you the night you went out with what’s-his-name. Did something happen between you two?”

  There was a hint of innuendo in her voice, but Regina didn’t have time to correct her or explain.

  “Look, I can tell you about it later. For now, I need you to handle it. Just show them what we have so far, and write down whatever they say. I’ll leave all the folders. You don’t need the books. Can you get the folders in your bag? No, just hold on to the case. We can talk tonight.”

  She grabbed her purse and hurried out.

  * * *

  Nigel spotted Regina when he turned on the laptop to set up his slide-show presentation. He’d never really seen her in business attire. She was...breathtaking. She was always beautiful, but something about seeing her dressed in the fashion of his world made his manhood stir and begin to menace him something awful. He had to calm his body down.

  She had on a navy blue skirt suit that hugged her body the way he wanted to. It was a traditional cut, except that the top tapered toward the waist right where his hands would go, and from there a ruffled hem flared out over her curves. A triangle of her camisole was visible under the jacket above the bust, just below a row of white pearls. Her hair spilled out over her head in neat curls parted on the side, and dangling pearls fell from her ears. He had to control himself or lose his composure, but he’d never wanted to touch and ravish a woman so badly.

  He couldn’t take his eyes off her, not even when she glanced in his direction and caught him staring. He didn’t move until he realized that she was passing her things over to her business partner, as if she was about to leave. When she turned on her heels and hurried toward the back door, he called one of the office assistants to come check the slide show, and sprinted after her.

  He stopped at Amelie’s table.

  “Hello, Ms. Richardson. Where’s Regina going?
Is she all right?”

  “It’s Richards—Amelie.”

  “Sorry. I almost had it.”

  “That’s okay, and so is she. What’s going on between you two?”

  “I was an idiot is what. Let me go try to catch her. Can I speak with you later, about business? Can I reach you at the number on your card?”

  “Yes, you can.”

  “Good, let me go try to catch her.”

  * * *

  She made it out of the large banquet room and halfway down the hall before she heard an out-of-breath voice behind her, getting nearer.

  “Wait. Reggie. Don’t leave the seminar on account of me. We have good information. I can help you.”

  “Leave me alone,” she said over her shoulder.

  He caught her arm at the glass doors leading outside the building, but she didn’t stop and pulled away.

  “You don’t have to leave, Reggie. It’s good information.”

  “I know.” She didn’t break her stride. “And I have a good partner who can get it for us.”

  He followed her down the walkway outside, toward the parking lot, his tie flying over his shoulder as he jostled to keep up with her, get ahead of her, stop her.

  “Regina, please don’t go. I was an idiot when I came by your place. I was jealous and acting like a kid. Don’t let it cheat you out of a good opportunity. Don’t let my stupidity do that.”

  She was at her car and found her keys.

  “I wouldn’t. I’ll get what I need to know.”

  She got in, closed the door and gunned the engine.

  He slapped the back hood in frustration as she tore away.

  When she got to the end of the row of cars, she slowed down, then stopped. She watched him in her rearview mirror as he headed back up the walk and into the building.

  She had stopped at the end of the lot, and she hadn’t started again. She just sat in her car with the blinker flashing, torn.

  She shouldn’t let his foolishness cheat her out of good information. But wasn’t she doing just that? At least he had acknowledged that it was foolishness.

 

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