The Click Trilogy
Page 14
From: Shelley Manning – July 25, 2011 – 11:01 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Holy Cow!
Sorry sweetie. Was in bed all weekend. His name was Christian but from now on, he shall be known as Mocha Man. He liked EVERYTHING dipped in chocolate. Yummy!
Anyway, I’m just getting to emails. Gotta confess, I’m not surprised at all that Miss Priss is a hypocrite. Those judgmental types usually are. Just look at all the overly religious folks and bible thumpers who end up sleeping with hookers, doing drugs, and cheating on their wives.
But I digress. First of all, you should NOT be feeling bad or desperate about online dating. Lots of people are doing this these days. In fact, I read that one in five relationships now start online. What you should feel bad about is letting her damage your (sadly and unjustifiably) already ailing self-esteem.
What you need is a big ol’ dose of moral superiority and you can get that by calling her out on her behavior and attitude.
From: Renee Greene – July 25, 2011 – 3:03 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Holy Cow!
You’re so right. And just the other day, she said she and Evan called it off because he told her she was a judgmental snob. And, instead of thinking that maybe she has some things to work on, she just said she deserves better than him. Now granted, I keep telling her she deserves better. Evan is an ass and a half, but still. She looks in the mirror and sees right past every flaw but has no problem noticing and pointing out the flaws in everyone else. I’m so pissed right now (Should we call Wee Man? –Tee Hee!) that I could just SCREAM!
From: Shelley Manning – July 25, 2011 – 3:15 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Holy Cow!
Harness that anger, channel it into a coherent but honest tirade and let ‘er rip. And, don’t forget to call or email me when it’s done. I’m SO curious how it goes. Would seriously LOVE to be a fly on the wall for that one.
From: Renee Greene – July 25, 2011 – 9:07 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: Holy Cow!
So I just got off the phone with Ashley and really let her have it. But not before I wrote out a speech on paper so I didn’t chicken out.
Basically, I told her that in all of the years we’ve been friends, I’ve looked past her snide comments and judgmental behavior because bottom line, she’s been a good friend and we’ve been friends for so long. But I was outraged (yes, I used the word outraged) that she continued to make me feel bad about something and then was doing the same thing behind my back.
She broke down and started crying. But I didn’t relent. I held my ground and explained her behavior was unacceptable. She apologized profusely and said that she’s just a very insecure person who probably uses it as a defense mechanism. Well, I told her that defense mechanism or not, she needs to be honest and refrain from making unfair judgments or we would have to dissolve our friendship.
I’ve NEVER spoken to anyone like that before in my entire life. I’m literally shaking.
From: Shelley Manning – July 25, 2011 – 10:02 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Holy Cow!
From: Renee Greene – July 29, 2011 – 3:30 PM
To: Shelley Manning, Mark Finlay, Ashley Price
Subject: Vegas, Baby!
So our event with Marsh 7 is this weekend in...VEGAS. YEAH! VEGAS BABY! I will be a pretty hip chick this weekend indeed. Everything for our event is done (hello, can you say organized!?) and so I'm really going to just capture it all on my phone. And, if I happen to snap a few photos of me with Marsh 7, so be it. I'm just excited to have an all-access pass to something...anything. For once, I'm gonna be cool. Hurrah! Okay, anyone who writes "Hurrah!" in an email cannot be THAT cool. But, nonetheless, this is close to cool as I'm ever gonna get.
From: Shelley Manning – July 29, 2011 – 4:02 PM
To: Mark Finlay, Ashley Price, Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Vegas, Baby!
Good luck, sweetie. I’m sure it will be an amazing event. And don’t forget, you are SUPERMODEL RENEE!
From: Ashley Price – July 29, 2011 – 4:15 PM
To: Shelley Manning, Renee Greene; Mark Finlay
Subject: Re: Vegas, Baby!
Knock ‘em dead!
From: Mark Finlay – July 29, 2011 – 5:30 PM
To: Shelley Manning, Ashley Price, Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Vegas, Baby!
“Hurrah” for Renee. (Guess I’m just not that cool either.)
From: Renee Greene – July 29, 2011 – 5:31 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Fwd: Re: Vegas, Baby!
Bite your tongue!
From: Shelley Manning – July 29, 2011 – 5:33 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Fwd: Re: Vegas, Baby!
Fine. Anyway, I have a date tonight. Maybe he’ll bite it for me. ;)
From: Renee Greene – July 31, 2011 – 10:07 PM
To: Shelley Manning, Mark Finlay, Ashley Price
Subject: 8th Grade Flashbacks :(
So, I am definitely not as cool as I thought after being at this event in Vegas. Now, considering I really didn't think I was all that cool to begin with, I've sunk to new lows. Let me start off by saying our event was great. The client was pleased and we had awesome consumer participation.
And, I must confess, the grass really is greener on the other side. Let's just say I felt really cool being on the inside of the barriers. No, I wasn't a lowly general consumer walking around and wondering if I would get a glimpse of someone who is a someone. I was being envied by other people. Now THAT hasn't happened in a really long time.
People were asking, begging, pleading to be let into the secure area where I was. And alas, they were rebuffed and sent away crying. (Okay, so they weren't crying. I'm adding a little dramatic license here. Just bear with me.)
But really, I felt like the most uncool person in the VIP area. In other words, I was the loser of the cool group. Can we say 8th grade all over again? UGH! The athletes looked at me (considering they never even spoke a word to me) as if I wasn't even there. Now granted, they were there for an exhibition and preparing to dazzle people with their extreme sports capabilities. Lord knows that if you really want to impress people, you've got to jump a BMX bike over a bunch of garbage cans. But still. They walked into an empty room and didn't even acknowledge that it wasn't really empty. I was there. However, it was cool to see Marsh 7. They only showed up for about 20 minutes. They were in a different secure location before their performance...ran to the green room after their set but before their encore. They were basically in their own little world except for Jason Kite, the bass player. He was so nice and asked me who I was and what I was doing there, how things were going, etc. He even asked for my card. Weird, huh?
From: Mark Finlay – July 31, 2011 – 10:26 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: 8th Grade Flashbacks :(
So sorry to hear that Renee. As you well know, I think you’re great.
From: Ashley Price – August 1, 2011 – 8:26 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: 8th Grade Flashbacks :(
UGH! So sorry, Renee. It’s hard to believe there are people out there who just feel superior to others. But, I don’t really remember 8th grade being all that bad. We’ll catch up properly with our lunch at Mel’s.
From: Shelley Manning – August 1, 2011 – 9:53 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: 8th Grade Flashbacks :(
How rude. You know, celebrities make me sick sometimes. Granted, I would love to be hanging out with th
em so I could look down on the little people. But since I'm a little person right now, they make me sick. They think they are so much better than everyone else. I'm sorry they were so rude to you. Little do they know that you are so worth knowing. But, that's pretty cool that Jason Kite was so chatty with you. Is he nice? Is he cute? DETAILS!!!
From: Renee Greene – August 1, 2011 – 11:07 AM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: 8th Grade Flashbacks :(
Actually, he was much cuter in person than I thought he would be. In the videos, he looks a bit greasy. He was quite grunge, but not in a dirty way. And he was much shorter than I expected, which made him all the more attractive. Like a real person and not some grandiose rock star. He was actually really nice. He seemed to be genuinely excited to be there and have the crowd so enthusiastic. I think he just felt sorry for me since everyone else was essentially ignoring me. And, they were actually really good live. Although they've never really been my style, they have some great songs.
From: Shelley Manning – August 1, 2011 – 11:15 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: 8th Grade Flashbacks :(
Oooh. You know I like them dirty. ;)
From: Fly12271@easymailusa.com – August 4, 2011 – 11:02 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Grab some dinner?
Hi Renee. It was great to meet you the other day. I'm going to be in LA in a few weeks and thought that maybe we could grab some dinner. Let me know if you are interested.
From: Renee Greene – August 4, 2011 – 11:07 AM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Fwd: Grab some dinner?
I have NO CLUE who this is from. He's not one of these Internet guys, because those all come via the service. And, I hid my profile for a while anyway. I'm racking my brains, but just can't think of who the heck this could be from. Thoughts?
From: Shelley Manning – August 4, 2011 – 11:17 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Fwd: Grab some dinner?
Hmmm. Think. Did you have any business meetings? Did you give your number out to anyone when we met for drinks at Flints last week? Nothing worse than an email from some random guy who wants to go out with you but you have no clue if he's a hottie or nottie or naughty (Ha! Ha!).
Although, nothing better than finding out that some random guy who wants to go out with you IS a hottie. Dilemma? Yes. Solution? Yes. Just make plans. If worse comes to worse, you can always call Miss Priss and do the fake emergency thing again. That seemed to work well for you a few months ago.
From: Fly12271@easymailusa.com – August 4, 2011 – 12:15 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Fwd: Grab some dinner?
Just realized that you probably have NO clue who that email was from. This is Jason Kite. We met at the MTV event in Vegas. Anyway, we're playing a few nights at the Roxy and I thought that you might be able to meet up for dinner at some point while I'm in town. Could also score tickets to the show for you if you want to come. Hope to hear from you.
From: Renee Greene – August 4, 2011 – 2:19 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Fwd: Fwd: Grab some dinner?
Okay. Am I just imaging things or is Jason Kite asking me on a date? A rock star wants to have dinner with me. Pinch me. I must be dreaming.
From: Shelley Manning – August 4, 2011 – 3:18 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Fwd: Fwd: Grab some dinner?
Holy crap! That is so awesome. And you thought he was just being nice to you out of pity. No, this man has good instincts and real smarts. He recognized right away that you were the quality among the quantity. Have dinner with him and get tickets for the show. Ask for backstage passes, too. The lead singer is a hottie and I want to meet him.
From: Renee Greene – August 4, 2011 – 4:47 PM
To: Fly12271@easymailusa.com
Subject: Re: Fwd: Grab some dinner?
Hi Jason. Thanks for the follow up email. I must confess, your email address did leave me racking my brain to figure out who exactly you were. Not that I give my info out to that many people. But, I just didn't expect to hear from you. I would love to meet up for dinner when you are in town. Are you sure you are going to have time? I'd think you’d be busy with sound checks, wardrobe checks, press interviews, etc. And, since you so kindly offered, I would love a few tickets to the show. My friend is really excited about seeing you guys in concert. Let me know what works for you.
From: Fly12271@easymailusa.com – August 4, 2011 – 7:18 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Fwd: Grab some dinner?
Sorry about that. I've got a real random email address so that I can have some anonymity when I'm ordering books online and other stuff like that. Yes, believe it or not, I read. ;) We are going to be pretty busy, but I would really like to make the time to see you. I really enjoyed talking with you at the MTV event. You seem really real. I know that must sound
weird. But in this business, it's hard to meet people who are real. The other guys in the band are still really into this whole lifestyle, but I'm getting a bit tired of all of the phoniness and stuff. Wow! Didn't mean to get so deep on you. Anyway, I'll be coming into town on the 15th. Our shows are on the 17th and 18th. So, I could do dinner on the 16th or 19th and then if you want to come to the show either night, I'll get you and your friends backstage. Tell me how many tickets you need.
From: Renee Greene – August 4, 2011 – 8:27 PM
To: Fly12271@easymailusa.com
Subject: Re: Fwd: Grab some dinner?
I can understand the whole "real" thing, believe me. I bet it's hard to be living on the road and surrounded by people that probably want something from you. Dinner on the 16th sounds great. And, if I could get two tickets for the concert on the 17th, that would be great too. One for me and one for my friend.
From: Fly12271@easymailusa.com – August 4, 2011 – 9:36 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: Fwd: Grab some dinner?
Two tickets, that's all? No problem. See, you are real. Most people hear "free tickets" and ask for like 20. I'll arrange for them to be at will call under your name. I'm really glad you are free for dinner. Why don't I give you a call at your office on Wednesday or Thursday and we can figure out the details. Sound good?
From: Renee Greene – August 4, 2011 – 9:39 PM
To: Fly12271@easymailusa.com
Subject: Re: Fwd: Grab some dinner?
That sounds great. I'll talk with you soon.
From: Renee Greene – August 5, 2011 – 9:16 AM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: All Access
You are cordially invited to see Marsh 7 (BACKSTAGE!!!!) with me on Wednesday, August 17th. So, mark your calendar. Jason is going to have two tickets reserved for us at will call and I'm having dinner with him the night before. This is REALLY WEIRD.
From: Shelley Manning – August 5, 2011 – 10:31 AM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: All Access
YAHOO! WOW! I am so excited. Did you tell him that I think the lead singer is totally hot and that I'm excited to meet him? I can't believe you are having dinner with him. Where are you guys going? Is he picking you up? in a limo? in a touring van? As always, DETAILS!!!
From: Renee Greene – August 5, 2011 – 2:57 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: All Access
No details to share yet. We haven't figured out all of that stuff. He's going to call me a few days before and we'll decide. I just wonder if he does this in every city. You know. Maybe he's tired of the groupies who are just there at his beck and call and wants a challenge. So, he picks some normal person and tries to woo them.
I'm also wondering if we have anything in common. I mean, I work for a PR firm. My clients make paint and cooking oil. What, if anything, will we have to talk about? He's a rock star for god sakes. And no, I did not tell him th
at you wanted to jump the lead singer. I thought that might be better conversation over dinner. ;)
From: Shelley Manning – August 5, 2011 – 4:07 PM
To: Renee Greene
Subject: Re: All Access
Yeah, explaining that I'm willing to do ANYTHING for the lead singer is probably good first-date conversation for you. But, more importantly, I highly doubt that he asked you out as some sort of game or quest. Did you ever, for once, consider the fact that he asked you out because you are smart and beautiful? No, that would likely never occur to you, my self confidence-challenged friend. If I have to remind you one more time that you have got to realize how incredible you are, I'm going to...well, I just don't know what I'm going to do. But, it won't be pretty. Trust me. Just try to go with it. And, when have you ever been at a loss for words. My god! You could talk the ear off of a deaf man on a hot summer day. Conversation will be the least of your worries.
From: Renee Greene – August 5, 2011 – 4:31 PM
To: Shelley Manning
Subject: Re: All Access
What should I be worried about, then? JUST KIDDING. You're right. Well, I gotta run, my groupie friend. I actually have REAL work to do. I'll talk with you tonight.
From: Renee Greene – August 8, 2011 – 11:13 AM
To: Shelley Manning, Ashley Price, Mark Finlay
Subject: Worst Nightmare Realized
Well, worst career nightmare. (Honestly, I think I’ve already lived through the worst dating nightmares possible!) So, I vowed that in my public relations career, I would never don a mascot costume. I never wanted to be the poor schlub roasting away in a hot mess of fur shaking hands with people at a mall or ballgame. And fortunately for me, during the early years of PR agency life in New York, I escaped mascot duty. I figured that as I moved up the corporate ladder, I would subject interns and other junior staff to this form of professional torture. But my worst nightmare has been realized. Our agency has prepared a game show for a client’s sales meeting and one of the team members is sick. So, at the last minute, MY boss has dictated that I have to fly to Minneapolis (no, that’s not the nightmare part, but it’s close!) to play the role of Spamma White, game show hostess. Someone else will be portraying Pat Laidback, game show host. I need to wear an old bridesmaid’s dress they found at a resale shop, smile incessantly and hand out Rice ‘a Roni as consolation prizes to people who get the answers wrong.