She giggled; an adorable sound I wanted to wake up to every day.
“You said he’s into some hardcore stuff? What does he do?”
I looked over at her, unsure if I wanted to tell her everything about Jonathan. I didn’t want her judging him before she even met him.
“Just some bullshit. Nothing to worry your pretty head about. He’s a good guy, Red. I can’t tell you how many times he’s helped get me out of some crazy stuff. Trust me, you’ll love him.”
She smiled. “If you love him, then I already do.”
I squeezed her hand, pulling it up to my mouth so I could kiss her knuckles.
I parked close to the dock, pressing my hand on the small of her back as we made our way down to the end. The heels on her booties clapped against the wood planks of the dock, making a bit of music with the lapping sound of the water hitting the posts.
“Hey, Finch,” I said as we approached a smaller boat.
When Jonathan had parties on board, Finch, his father’s assistant, ferried the guests to the yacht and back to the dock.
He nodded, reaching up and helping Shannon board the smaller boat.
I dropped down after her and pulled her to my side as we hit the small waves on the way to the large yacht in the distance. The lights of the yacht lit up the night, making us able to see it from far away, and I could hear the music spilling from the expensive sound system once we were halfway there.
“This is so fun,” Shannon said, enjoying the boat ride.
“Is this the first time you’ve ever been on a boat?”
She nodded.
“You’re a wild woman,” I said, kissing the side of her head.
She giggled once again, the sound making me love her even more.
The boat ride to the yacht lasted only minutes, and soon, we were on board. Shannon’s eyes took in the grandeur of the yacht, twinkling in the lights strung high above us. She was friendly to every person we passed, and when I stopped to chat with a few of my friends, I introduced her as my girlfriend.
We hadn’t technically made it official, but seeing the grin on her face whenever I referred to her that way let me know it was a conversation we didn’t need to have because we were on the same page.
I knew Jonathan would be at his spot next to the gas fire, so I started that way, my arm around Shannon’s waist the entire way. It took a bit to get there, since everyone we passed wanted an introduction to Shannon, but then we broke through the crowd and I spotted Jonathan’s back, Corrine planted in his lap with a flirty grin on her face.
Once we reached his side, I tapped him on his shoulder, making him turn around.
“Oh hey, man,” he said loudly. “Glad you could finally make it.”
“Me too.”
“So where’s the goddess?” he asked.
I looked back, and Shannon was behind me talking to a girl, not paying attention. I waited until she had finished chatting and then grabbed her around the waist and pulled back to my side with a huge, happy grin on my face.
“Here she is,” I said. “Jonathan, this is Shannon. Shannon, this is my best friend, Jonathan.”
TWENTY
SHANNON
MY BREATH HALTED AS MY LUNGS COLLASPED IN ON THEMSELVES.
My knees shook as my eyes latched on to him, sure I was seeing things. Then my eyes moved down, landing on the crescent-shaped birthmark on his forearm, and I knew.
Jonathan Reins, the same Jonathan who took from me, was Matthew’s best friend.
I stumbled a bit, and Matthew pulled me closer with a chuckle. “You haven’t started drinking yet, have you, babe?”
I shook my head, answering.
I couldn’t believe my eyes.
Jonathan looked almost the same with the exception of his hair being a bit longer and his football physique slimmer, but he had the same dark eyes and the same sarcastic tilt to his mouth.
His eyes moved down my body, taking in my long legs and thighs, and when he met my eyes again, I saw the exact moment he remembered who I was.
He remembered me.
He remembered what he did to me.
I saw the memories skim across his expression briefly.
His eyes widened a bit, but not enough that anyone else would have noticed, and then he leaned in, grabbing my limp hand and shaking it, making me feel like I was drowning in the ocean water that surrounded us.
“Hi, Shannon,” he said. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”
The way he said the word pleasure made my stomach roil and bile rise up the back of my throat. He grinned, the side of his mouth lifting in a taunt I remembered well. He was testing me, seeing if I would open my mouth, but I couldn’t. I wouldn’t hurt Matthew that way.
He had said himself that Jonathan was like his brother. I wouldn’t be the reason he lost someone he loved. Not to mention, who was to say he would believe me over his best friend.
I couldn’t do it.
I wouldn’t.
My hand fell from his grasp, and even though it killed me, my lips tilted in a fake smile.
“Y-you t-too,” I stuttered, choking on the words.
I pushed behind Matthew, staying hidden while he and Jonathan talked. He kept his fingers twisted in mine, holding me there, occasionally swiping his thumb across my knuckles as he chatted.
I listened without hearing their words. I felt trapped, stuck on a large boat in the middle of the ocean with the one person in the world I never wanted to see again. My anxiety was getting the best of me, making me feel as if the boat was rocking when it wasn’t.
Motion sickness threatened, and I gagged, covering my mouth with my free hand.
“You okay, baby?” Matthew asked, his brows pulled low with worry.
I sucked in a breath, filling my lungs enough to get my words out. Nodding, I said, “Yeah. I’m fine, but could you tell me where the bathroom is?”
While Matthew explained how to get to the bathroom, my eyes locked on Jonathan’s, and the asshole had the nerve to smile at me.
As soon as I knew where I was going, I turned away and started toward the restroom, but before I could get too far, Matthew pulled me back, placing a sweet kiss on my lips right in front of his friends, Jonathan included.
“Don’t be long,” he whispered in my ear. “The quicker we get off this boat, the quicker I can spend the night making love to you.”
I pulled back, taking him in from his gorgeous blue eyes to his perfect smile. He really was everything I never knew I wanted.
My precious moment in time in a life I was just passing through.
And I loved him. I definitely loved him. Enough that I knew I would never hurt him. Even if it meant I had to hurt myself.
I nodded, placing another kiss on his lips before I pulled away.
Making my way toward the bathroom, dizziness swooped over me, making me hold on to the wall to keep from falling. A girl I passed laughed, commenting on how drunk I was. Little did she know I hadn’t had a single drink.
Once I reached the bathroom, I stood for a second staring at the door, knowing I couldn’t go in there. Knowing the real reason I had walked away from Matthew and the devil himself.
Turning, I started toward the opposite side of the boat, taking a set of steps that went down to the lower level. I cut through the crowd like I was being chased, sliding through the groups and saying, “Excuse me,” several times until I finally saw the place I wanted to go.
The little man in the boat looked up at me with a tiny smile.
“Headed out?” he asked.
I nodded. “Yes, Finch, please take me back to the dock.”
TWENTY-ONE
MATTHEW
SHE WAS GONE FOR AN AWFULLY LONG TIME.
Going toward the bathroom, I searched for Shannon, thinking maybe she had gotten caught up chatting with someone, but she was nowhere to be found.
I pulled out my phone to check if she had texted me or tried to call, but there was nothing there. I pulled up her mess
ages and sent a text, but being so far out on the water, my phone had a shit signal.
“Excuse me,” I said, stopping a woman who was leaving the bathroom. “Was there a tall redhead in there?” I asked.
The lady shook head. “No one’s in there.”
“Okay. Thank you.”
She moved back toward the party, leaving me to search yet again for Shannon.
Thirty minutes later, I was beginning to panic.
Had she fallen overboard?
Could she swim?
Why hadn’t I asked her if she could swim?
I was scanning the decks, checking every square inch of the yacht as the pressure on my chest told me something wasn’t right.
“What’s going on?” Jonathan came up beside me and asked.
“I can’t find Shannon. I’ve looked everywhere.”
I turned in circles, checking the area around me once more, but again, there was no sign of her.
Jonathan clapped me on the shoulder and took a swig from his drink. “I’m sure she’s around here somewhere, man. Don’t stress it. Let her have a good time.”
“No, you don’t understand,” I started, but he turned and walked away, leaving me there in a panic.
Going to the lower deck, I saw Finch out of the corner of my eye pulling up alongside the yacht alone. I moved toward his boat, grabbing the rail and leaning over to speak to him.
“Hey, Finch, have you seen the young lady I came here with?” I asked.
He nodded. “Yeah. I just dropped her at the dock.”
“What do you mean you dropped her at the dock? Alone?”
I jumped into his boat.
“She asked to go back, so I took her.” He shrugged.
I ran my fingers through my hair, feeling frantic.
She was alone. Downtown where dangerous people were everywhere.
“Take me to the dock. Show me where you left her.”
The boat ride to the dock seemed to drag on as if the yacht had moved farther out to sea when I knew for a fact it was anchored in place. When Finch pulled the boat up alongside the dock, I wasted no time jumping out before he had even idled the engine.
I ran down the dock, my shoes thumping along the wooden planks, but no one was there. Once I got to the shore, I searched the parking area only to find a couple going at in the back of a truck. I pulled my keys from my pocket and got in my car.
My phone lit up the inside of my car when I pulled it from my pocket and unlocked the screen. With a signal, I quickly typed out a text and sent it to her.
Me: Where are you?
Me: Are you okay?
No response.
My car roared to life when I cranked it, and I spun my tires when I pulled out of the parking lot and hauled ass toward Shannon’s apartment. I checked my phone the entire trip to her place, but she never returned my message.
Finally, I pulled up at her apartment building.
Her car was parked in front, which meant she hadn’t gone anywhere in her car. Going to her door, I knocked several times until finally Devin swung the door open with a furious expression.
“What the fuck, man? Why are you beating on the door this late at night?” he asked.
“Shannon,” I said losing my breath. “Is she here?”
“She’s not here. We thought she was with you.”
I didn’t respond.
Instead, I turned around and ran back to my car with Devin calling my name behind me.
I peeled out of the parking lot, not really sure where I was going. If she wasn’t with me and she wasn’t at home, the only other place I could think she might have gone was back to my place.
Again, I pulled out my phone and checked for a response.
Nothing.
I made it to my place in record time. Leaving my car on, I threw it in park and hopped out, searching my front porch to see if maybe she was sitting and waiting for me.
The porch and my house were empty.
“Fuck!” I shouted, making a run for my car yet again.
I climbed in, slamming the door behind me, and sat staring out of the windshield.
Where was she?
Checking my phone once again, I saw she still hadn’t responded. I typed out another message to her and hit send.
Me: Please, Shannon, let me know you’re ok.
A few minutes passed, then finally, my phone buzzed with a response.
Red: I’m ok.
I breathed a sigh of relief before I messaged back.
Me: What happened? Where are you?
Red: I’m sorry I left. I needed to get out of there.
Me: I would have left with you. If you weren’t in the mood to go anywhere, we could have stayed home.
Me: Where are you? I’ll come and get you.
Red: No.
Me: What do you mean, no?
Red: I’m sorry, Matthew. I can’t do this.
Me: What are you talking about? What can’t you do?
Me: Please tell me where you are.
Red: I’m sorry. It’s over.
My heart skipped, and I pressed the call button instead of texting. It rang once before she sent me to voicemail. I hung up and tried again, and again, her voicemail picked up.
Me: Please answer.
Me: What did I do?
Me: Let’s discuss this.
Red: I’m sorry.
Me: Don’t do this.
Me: I love you.
Minutes passed as I waited for a response. I called once again, feeling like a total ass, and the phone never rang. Instead, it went straight to voicemail.
Ten minutes later, my phone buzzed yet again.
Red: I don’t feel the same. I’m sorry.
I dropped my phone in my lap and pushed my face into my hands.
Something happened. There was no way she would change her mind about us so quickly. Whatever it was, we could get past it. I would give her the night to think it over and blow off steam or whatever she needed, and then I would go over and talk with her and see if we could fix the problem.
Me: I don’t believe you. I’ll see you tomorrow. Please get home safe. I love you.
TWO DAYS LATER AND I STILL HADN’T HEARD FROM HER.
I called and texted, but it seemed she had me blocked. I went to her apartment, but her car was never there. Only Lilly was working the store, and when I asked her what was going on, she seemed just as clueless as I was.
I was pulling my hair out trying to figure what happened. I was getting nowhere.
A week later and nothing.
Eating was making me feel sick, and most days, I would stay at home with my phone close by in case she changed her mind about me. After a few days of not leaving my house, I decided I needed to get out for a bit.
I drove down to Waterfront Park and sat on the same swing where I first kissed her. Depression hung over me like black smog, choking me when I breathed and making it next to impossible to fill my lungs to capacity.
I couldn’t breathe. I missed her so much my entire body ached.
The following day, I visited Twin Oaks. I hadn’t been there in a while, and I thought maybe Jermaine could cheer me up.
“Damn, dude, you look like shit,” he said, scrunching up his nose.
“Thanks,” I muttered.
“No, for real, though, what the hell happened to you, man?”
“She left me.”
His face cleared and sorrow filled his eyes. “That sucks, bro. What happened?”
That was the million-dollar question.
I kept thinking if I knew what happened it would be easier to move past it, but I knew in my heart of hearts that was bullshit. I would never get over Shannon. She was it for me.
Being at Twin Oaks made the ache worse. Every inch of the building held memories of her, and I kept hoping that the longer I stayed there, the more likely I was to run into her. Sadly, I didn’t even know who she visited when she came. At least if I knew that, I could maybe question them.
Since I was there, I helped Jermaine clean the place. Going from door to door, I collected trash and replaced the bags with fresh ones. When I got to room three hundred, I tapped on the door and opened it to find Miss Iris sitting in her chair crocheting.
Her face lit up with a smile when she looked up and saw me standing in her doorway.
“Hey, honey, come on in.” She stood from her chair, shuffling across the floor toward me for a hug. “It’s been too long. I was starting to worry something happened to you.”
I wanted to open up to her—tell her all about Shannon and how badly she had hurt me—to see if maybe she had a clue why a woman would just up and disappear since I couldn’t seem to figure out why.
“Sorry about that. I’ve been a bit busy,” I said, going for her trash can and pulling out the bag.
“Don’t you worry yourself, hon. I might be old, but I remember what it was like to be young.”
She sat in her chair again, picking up her yarn and crocheting needles. When she did, she bumped a small box on the table, knocking it to the floor. The lid flew open and pictures spilled out.
“Oh, no,” she said. “I’m a clumsy old fool.”
She chuckled, trying to lean over and collect the things.
“I’ll get it, Miss Iris,” I said, making my way over and leaning down to pick up the box and photos.
When I leaned over, my eyes latched onto the photo on the very top.
It was a young girl with a long red braid hanging over her shoulder. She smiled at the camera, missing her front teeth, her green eyes sparkling with happiness.
My lungs deflated, and my fingers shook as I picked the photo up and held it closer to my face.
Shannon.
It was definitely my Shannon.
She was just a little girl, her features not as defined, her body skinny and unshapely, but it was her.
I looked up at Miss Iris, the picture dangling from my fingers.
“That’s my granddaughter,” she said, smiling proudly. “Isn’t she a beauty?”
Hot & Heavy (Chubby Girl Chronicles Book 2) Page 19