Change of Heart 05 - Forging the Future

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Change of Heart 05 - Forging the Future Page 19

by Mary Calmes


  “But you gave him the opportunity,” I argued. “You know you did. The priest wanted you and Ammon El Masry to square off, but instead it was him and Domin. You stepped back and gave Domin his shot.”

  “And look how well he’s done.”

  “He has, but still, the priest wanted you, and now, finally, years after his passing, he’ll get his wish.”

  “If I was him, I’d haunt you,” Justin teased my mate.

  “Again, shut up, and you,” he said gently, eyes on me, “need to get used to the idea of living in the desert.”

  “But I hate the heat.”

  My statement sent Justin into peals of laughter.

  “He’s annoying, right?” Logan chuckled.

  Yes, he certainly was.

  BY THE time I showered and changed and got back downstairs, the others were blearily waking, and Eva had started cooking. She was thrilled to see Justin, hugged him tight, and then had him and Christophe sit down so she could feed them first.

  Danny was adorable when he came stumbling downstairs, rubbing his eyes and blinking at the sight of Justin Cho sitting at the dining room table. He turned to go back upstairs, but Justin got up so quickly to bar the smaller man’s path that he bumped the table.

  Danny’s groan made Justin smile in response. “So, how did that situation work out with Koren?”

  “It’s none of your business,” he replied disdainfully, as if Justin smelled like cow manure instead of warm musk and clean male.

  Justin took a step closer, into Danny’s personal space, and the younger man had to tip his head all the way back to hold eye contact. With Danny being five nine and Justin six six, the height disparity was hot. “Oh, it’s definitely my business,” Justin said, his voice husky as he took Danny’s chin in hand.

  “You were se-serious?” Danny stammered, noticeably stunned.

  “Why wouldn’t I be?”

  “Bu-but you said ‘when.’”

  “I did say when,” he agreed, bending to kiss Danny’s cheek. “When Koren Church leaves you, you agree to be mine.”

  “But I didn’t think you—”

  “Logan is my best friend. I’d do anything for him, but I didn’t know he’d actually need me here so he could sleep. I came to check on you.”

  “No, you—”

  Justin nuzzled Danny’s cheek so he would tip his head sideways, and when he did, Justin kissed along his jaw to his ear. “I came here for you,” he said, slipping his hands around Danny’s hips and drawing him closer, against him.

  Danny’s exhale was sharp, and his eyes fluttered shut. “I’m not—over… I’m still messed up from—you knew he’d leave me.”

  “I did.”

  Danny lifted his hands to Justin’s chest and leaned into the bigger, stronger man. It was very telling, the motion and the absolute surrender. “You knew he’d get tired of me.”

  “I know Koren’s an idiot,” Justin murmured so quietly that I had to take a few steps closer to them to hear. “And he never keeps what’s best for him.”

  “Best?” Danny asked, his voice muffled as he spoke into Justin’s wide chest, wrapping his arms around Justin’s waist.

  “Yes.” Justin grinned smugly, and if Danny could have seen it, he’d have known that the fight, such as it was, was over, and that Justin was ready to claim what was his.

  “We should maybe give them some privacy,” Logan whispered into my ear.

  I waved him off and heard his long-suffering groan. “Shhhh.”

  “So you’ll be my rebound guy, and then you’ll leave me too?”

  Justin grunted, shoved Danny back, and then bent and threw him over his shoulder in a caveman move that made my cousin yelp in surprise.

  “You’re watching too many movies,” Justin assured him. “I waited longer than I should have, out of respect for Logan.”

  “Me?” my mate responded indignantly.

  “Yes, you,” Justin said, turning. “He’s your brother, after all.”

  “If you wanted Danny, you should have fought for him.”

  “Put me down,” the man in question demanded weakly even though he no more wanted to be put down than I wanted a root canal.

  “What do you think I’m doing here?” Justin yelled at Logan. “I’m fighting.”

  Logan gave him a dismissive wave.

  “We both know you don’t really want me,” Danny lamented.

  I rolled my eyes, turning to face Logan as Justin left the room. “He’s so dramatic,” I passed judgment as I heard Justin pounding up the stairs.

  “Pot to kettle,” Crane said as he walked into the room, holding Yusuke’s hand.

  “You don’t even know what we were talking about,” I groused at him as his wife attacked me, leaping into my arms, coiling around me tight.

  “You calling anyone out for being dramatic is ridiculous,” Crane assured me, palming the back of my head as he leaned in to kiss my cheek. “Again, thank you for what you did. We both know that Logan knew you could save me, so that’s why he picked Ivan, but still—that was all you.”

  Of course I knew, everyone did, and even Ivan could not be so clueless as to think that, given a choice, there was any way Logan would have chosen him over Crane. If there had been a gun in Vincent’s hand, Crane would be dead. No question. But it had been a sword, and a sword created slow enough physical damage that I could heal it. Just as many years ago I’d shifted too fast to be burned in a fire, I could now compel Crane to that same speed. That was good since the pace was what saved his life. Alone, Crane could never have shifted fast enough.

  “I have blind faith in you,” he said with a tiny catch in his voice. “I always have, so it’s second nature to me, and I always will.”

  I took a breath so I wouldn’t dissolve, leaned into him, and clunked my head down on his shoulder so he could rub my head while I hugged his weeping wife, who seemed content to simply let me hold her.

  Suddenly she lifted her head, sniffled, and looked at me. “Was that Justin Cho?”

  I chuckled through my own tears. “Yeah.”

  Louder sniffle. “He’s a very handsome man.”

  “Standing right here,” Crane told her, leaning away from me, smacking Yusuke’s ass hard before asking Eva if she would make him banana pancakes for breakfast even though it was closer to three.

  “Of course, darling,” she crooned, opening her arms for him.

  He went into them as Ivan staggered into the room and up to Logan. “I think your friend, that semel from California, just threw me out of my room.”

  Logan grinned at him. “Yeah? Did he have Danny with him?”

  He nodded. “Yeah, that was weird.”

  Poor Ivan was not yet awake.

  “Would you like some banana pancakes?” Eva offered. “I’m making some for Crane.”

  “Yes, please,” he answered groggily, walking to the kitchen table and sitting down. “Is there coffee?”

  Andrian’s wife, Irina, who was also moving around the kitchen—chopping vegetables for stew, it looked like, and checking on a roast—turned and exchanged smiles with Eva. “I’ll bring you a cup, Vanya. Do you want cream?”

  “Thank you and yes,” he said before he folded his arms and put his head down on them.

  I put Yusuke on her feet, and she kissed me again, hugged me once more, and then, in a total breach of her normal steely discipline, walked over and hugged Logan. The look of absolute shock on his face made me chuckle as Ilia came into the kitchen with Crane and Yusuke’s girls following behind him. I’d forgotten that they did that, trailed after him like baby ducks.

  “Papa, I’m hungry.” He then indicated the girls, and Dmitri, who appeared quickly, with a wave of his hand. Imperious, just like his father, he, too, would be a semel someday, and at present, it looked like he might be a semel-aten. I assumed the kids had been up during the past day while the rest of us slept, likely under Eva’s and Irina’s watchful eyes. “We all are.”

  “Would you all like
banana pancakes and bacon?” Eva asked.

  They all wanted that badly, and Eva asked Irina to help her. Everyone was waking up, and she needed people eating, not waiting. Irina was more than happy to help but worried because she knew it was time for Logan to talk to her son. I saw him walk to the end table in the living room and return with Andrian’s dagger. He told Dmitri he could eat in just a minute, but he had to talk to him first.

  “I’ll help Mom,” Delphine offered as she walked into the kitchen with Markel.

  She came to kiss me, Markel stopped to hug me, and Irina hugged me on her way out to sit in the airy living room with Logan and her son.

  I didn’t want to intrude, but I had to watch from the doorway. I was surprised when Ilia walked by me into the living room and took a seat beside Dmitri on the couch. After a moment, Dmitri leaned on Ilia, and I watched my son put a hand on his knee. It was very sweet, the two of them cuddling like the panthers they were. Instinctively, Ilia knew Dmitri was sad and so had sought to offer support.

  The moment Dmitri understood he was never going to see his father again, he dissolved into tears, hopped off the couch, and flung himself at Logan. My mate hugged him tight, opened an arm for Irina, and both mother and son were in his lap. I knew, even without hearing it, that Logan was promising to always be there, always care for them, and that they both would go with him wherever he went, would always have a place in his home. It was critical that he reiterate what he’d told Irina before. She needed to hear it, and so did her son.

  Standing there watching the tender scene, I suddenly felt like I was intruding, so I walked back into the kitchen, pleased that the guesthouse had an open floorplan so I could still see Logan and Ilia but also join in with the warm family bonding time in the kitchen.

  Crane was having an orgasm from eating pancakes and Yusuke was giggling, which she never did, just listening to him. Eva was beside herself with happiness, and Markel could not stop snickering.

  “Seriously?” Delphine teased Crane. “Would you like to be alone with your food?”

  He continued to eat, clearly in ecstasy, and I told Eva that I’d have what he was having. She dissolved into a fit of laughter, and it was really good to hear.

  When Logan and Irina and the two boys rejoined us, Dmitri showed everyone his father’s dagger and then settled down to have pancakes and eggs and bacon as well. Logan and Ilia sitting down on either side of me made me ridiculously happy for so small a thing. But maybe it was just being together.

  Once breakfast was over, I got up to help Eva and Irina with the dishes. But before anyone else could rise, Yusuke leaned forward and pinned Ivan with her stare. It was amazing, how she could go from happy and laughing with her husband to hyperfocused predator in seconds. I was surprised by how intent she looked, and when I glanced at Crane, he touched his finger to his lips. Apparently I was not to interrupt his mate. She was acting as maahen at the moment, not friend.

  “Ivan,” she said coldly, her tone killing all conversation in the room. “How did Sasha get in the house?”

  “What?” he asked, chuckling, pretending the question was meaningless instead of his entire future riding on the answer.

  “You heard me,” she prodded gravely, her voice devoid of any and all warmth, her lips pressed into a hard line. “How… did Sasha get into the house?”

  He lifted his head to meet her stare, which people thought, with her only having one eye, would somehow not be as frightening as it was.

  “Friday night,” she said slowly, so there was no question that he heard her. “You were asleep in the back. How did Sasha get by you?”

  The room went silent, and Ivan lifted his head to look Markel in the eye. It made sense, it did: they had been, so many years ago, Domin Thorne’s sylvan and sheseru together, though why Domin had ever picked either of them for those positions was beyond me. Markel was not big enough or strong enough to be a sheseru, and more than that, he did not have the killer instinct that was necessary. Ivan did not have the encyclopedic mastery of the law needed to be a sylvan. Neither had been an informed choice, but that was before Domin knew anything about leading. He made far better decisions these days.

  Markel sighed deeply as he stared at perhaps his oldest friend. “Was Koren here last night, Vanya? Did he call you outside?”

  Ivan scrunched up his face in an effort not to cry, but the tears welled up quickly anyway.

  “Did he text you like he used to when he was still with Danny?” Markel pried. “To hook up with him in secret?”

  Quick nod.

  “So you left the house to meet him outside.”

  “Yes.”

  “Did you see Sasha come in the house?”

  “No,” he answered Markel and then turned back to Yusuke. “I swear on my life, maahen: I would have never let him in,” he promised, his voice breaking. “I would never allow anyone to hurt my semel.”

  She was deciding, and Logan was standing quietly beside me, letting her weigh what she knew of him against what she did not. “Did you see Koren throw you away last night?”

  He nodded.

  “Are you certain?”

  More nodding because his voice was gone.

  “Because wanting something—someone—and falling under their spell… I understand that. Once.”

  He swallowed hard, barely breathing.

  “From now on, no one in this family can be weak.”

  The tears spilled over.

  “Do you understand?”

  He suddenly reached out to her, and after what felt like an endless moment, she grasped his hand and gave him the lifeline he needed.

  “No one in this family can be weak,” she reiterated.

  “Yes,” Ivan said, his voice finding purchase, the sound clearing.

  “Okay,” she breathed, and I turned to look at Logan.

  “Maahen,” he whispered and gave her shoulder a squeeze.

  I glanced at Ivan, and we both understood that had he answered any of her questions with anything but the truth that she had already surmised, she would have gutted him right there in the kitchen with only a quick word to cover the eyes of the children.

  “The maahen is merciful and wise,” Ivan said softly.

  “She is,” Crane agreed, leaning to kiss his mate’s cheek. “But she’s also unforgiving a second time.”

  As she quickly covered her mate’s cheek with her hand, I realized how right Crane was. There were no second chances with Logan Church’s maahen. Heaven help you if you thought there were.

  Chapter 14

  SOON AFTER Yusuke decided to allow Ivan to continue breathing, Christophe came in with the news that we were ordered to the pit for the formal division of the tribe.

  “I don’t understand,” Delphine said, looking to me to translate the law for her.

  “Before the actual challenge,” I explained, “everyone has to officially choose either Logan or Russ. All members of the tribe have to stand and be counted.”

  “Why?”

  “So whoever loses, those people who chose wrong will either be exiled or slaughtered, depending on what the old semel, or new one, decrees.”

  “That’s barbaric.”

  “That’s the law,” Logan replied.

  After deciding that Justin and Danny, who were still upstairs, and Eva were enough—with ten members of Christophe’s khatyu—to stay and watch Ilia, Dmitri, Jinny, and Suki, the rest of us left to make the long walk out to the pit of the tribe of Mafdet. It was strange to be going to the amphitheater-shaped structure for the next to the last time. I would see it during the challenge, of course, but never again after that. As I strolled beside Logan, I sensed things coming full circle. I had started my life as the mate of my semel in the pit, had shown the tribe my power for the first time, and so it was strange to be saying good-bye and taking their semel with me. My life in Nevada, on the mountain, was ending, but I found I wasn’t scared anymore. I didn’t think I was stealing Logan’s life or his legacy anymore. His
new one would be better, and if everything he said was right, if Domin followed through, then semel-aten was a much greater lineage than any other.

  When we reached the pit, I wasn’t surprised that the sorting was already underway. A table stood on the raised dais at the center of the floor, and Russ and Lydia were seated there, flanked by Peter and Koren. Marina was there as well, standing beside Koren, her arm linked with his, smitten even while still staring down her nose at everyone who came near them.

  Ivan was overwhelmed—how uncomfortable he looked, wringing his hands and shifting his weight from one foot to the other. Seeing that Koren had chosen the stunning blonde woman had to be hard on him. I was going to send him back to the house—Logan had his proxy anyway—but Yusuke’s words about the family being strong sank into me, and I knew we all needed to remain and stand together.

  As we took the steps that descended to the floor of the amphitheater, and then those that led up to the stage, whispers and murmurs followed as we moved around the lines of people to face the dais.

  Peter’s hatred was palpable, his lips set in a hard line, his eyes cold and flat, and the disgust there for anyone to see as Logan stepped up to face Russ.

  “Yes?” Russ asked formally.

  “I used to sit at the kitchen table and help you with your algebra. Do you even remember that?” Logan asked gently.

  “Yes,” Russ assured him. “And I also remember you allowing me to leave.”

  “You wanted to leave Nevada so bad, Russ. You hated Incline Village, and then when you wanted to be a duat on Miguel Garza’s land, I let you make your own decision.”

  “I made that choice after Jin pulled me by force through my shift, just like he did the day before yesterday! Your mate is a menace, and he should be put down like a rabid dog, and your mongrel son with him!”

  Logan bristled, but I took hold of his hand and squeezed. Just that much contact calmed him so that the timbre of his voice never once changed.

  “I have my mother’s proxy. She will follow me, if that wasn’t already abundantly apparent,” he said tightly. “And Danny is, of course, going with me as well.”

 

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