by A. M. Burns
Uncle Bryan poured steak sauce onto his plate. “That’s probably good. I know that sounds weird, but one member of a couple having a little experience will make it easier. Two virgins always make for an awkward and often painful situation. Depending on what you do, it’s hard to avoid a little pain, but minimizing it makes it easier to get to the pleasurable parts.”
Dillon paused with his knife poised to cut another piece of steak. “You know, Uncle Bryan, I’m not sure I’m ready to hear about your youthful adventures. I appreciate us being open and all, but we’re getting TMI. If you know what I mean?”
Uncle Bryan nodded vigorously. “Thank you. Yeah, I think you’re right there. Anytime I start wandering off on tangents you’re not comfortable with, just let me know. This whole situation, us being closer family than we have been, is going to take some getting used to for both of us, I think.”
“Right. But I’m glad we can talk and be buddies. That makes everything easier.” He got quiet as the steak in his mouth lost its flavor. “Mom and I used to be buddies.” He swallowed the steak, and it did little to push down the sad lump that was rising. “Sometimes she was more my buddy than my mother. That’s why I don’t understand her not believing me.” He put his fork on his plate and stared at his meal. It wasn’t the first time a happy moment had turned on him partway through. The memories of his mother were still so recent, and the wound her death left was still raw.
“She was both our buddies.” Uncle Bryan reached across the table and squeezed his hand. “It’s going to be a while before things get easy for us. It’s okay.”
Dillon squeezed his uncle’s hand back, thankful for the tactile contact that helped ground him back in the present. He let out a long slow breath. “Thanks for understanding.”
“We both lost her.”
It was several minutes before they continued eating, and then it was in a haunted silence. Like he did when memories of his mom hit, Dillon expected her to show up and be there with them. There was just the emptiness where she should’ve been.
“I take it Dusty and Rusty did okay for you guys today?” Uncle Bryan broke the silence first.
Dillon nodded, thankful for a subject that his mother had nothing to do with. She didn’t like animals and had never understood his or Uncle Bryan’s interest in them. “They did fine. I think it’s going to take me a while to get totally comfortable with them, or maybe it’s just the saddle. My butt’s sore tonight.”
“So Rusty didn’t give Scott any trouble? He can be a bit of a handful at times.”
“Scott seemed to get along with Rusty just fine. Dusty was mellow, or at least I thought he was.”
“If Dusty gets any more mellow, he’s going to lay down in the field and never get up again, but expect us to bring him his grain and hay. I think he would make a good kid’s horse, but you’re the youngest one around here.”
“I’ll try and be gentle with him while I get everything figured out. Scott said you were wanting the horses ridden more.”
“Right. I’ve been so busy lately that I haven’t had time to ride them like I used to. You guys feel free to ride anytime you want to, just so long as you aren’t neglecting chores either here or down at Scott’s. I know Alex and Paul rely on him to get a lot done around their place.”
Dillon finished his dinner and laid his fork and knife on his plate. “Don’t worry. We’ll stay on top of things.”
“And speaking of staying on top of things. I’ve got a business meeting tomorrow. It’s a Skype meeting, but I’ll be busy all afternoon. I need you to run into the apartment and meet the Goodwill guys who are picking up the furniture. If you’re not up for it, I understand and will see about rescheduling.”
The idea of going to the apartment by himself filled Dillon with dread. Then a thought struck him. “Let me see if Scott can go with me. I don’t want to go alone, but we need to finish that up. Right?”
“Right.”
20
DILLON’S HAND shook slightly as he slipped the key into the lock of the old apartment. Other than Scott being with him, it felt like he was coming home after school, and his mother would be there shortly with whatever take-out dinner she’d decided to pick up for them. The light streaming in through the partially closed blinds was enough to show that there wasn’t much left in the place. All the pictures and mementos were gone, in many cases leaving lighter spots on the walls where the items had protected the paint from all the nicotine in his mother’s cigarettes. There were spots in the carpet that matched the walls, where heavy furniture hadn’t been moved in years.
“So how long before the Goodwill folks are supposed to show up?” Scott asked as he closed the door.
“We have a window of time.” Dillon started to sit in the recliner, then decided it was too familiar. It was where his mother liked to sit. He opted for the couch instead. “During the next couple of hours.”
Scott sat next to him. “What did you want to do while we wait?”
Dillon ran a tentative hand down Scott’s arm, then shook his head. “I don’t know. Sorry, but I don’t feel like making out or anything. This was Mom’s place. I don’t think she’d approve.”
“I understand.” Scott patted his hand and offered up a soft, knowing smile.
A sharp knock sounded strange in the nearly empty apartment.
Dillon stood. “That was quick.” He hurried to the door.
Robbie was standing there. “Hey, Dillon.”
“Hey, Robbie.” Dillon struggled to find words. Suddenly seeing Robbie as opposed to just chatting with him online, he felt awkward. Robbie was a part of his old life.
“You said in chat last night you were coming into town today to finish cleaning out the apartment. I figured I could stop by and lend a hand. Maybe after, we can grab a burger or something.” He stared past Dillon, and his face hardened slightly.
“You must be Robbie.” Scott appeared around Dillon’s side and offered his hand. “I’m Scott Bradley.”
“Robbie Collins, nice to meet you.” Robbie returned Scott’s handshake. There was a coldness in his voice that Dillon hadn’t heard before.
Dillon gestured for them to have a seat. “I was just telling Scott I don’t know how long it’s going to be until the guys from Goodwill get here. All that’s left is the furniture that Uncle Bryan and I decided not to take, or that he didn’t have room for.” Or substandard items Uncle Bryan hadn’t wanted cluttering up his house, and I wasn’t attached to.
“So you’re just going to sit around and wait for them?” Robbie settled in the recliner while Dillon and Scott returned to the couch.
Robbie raised a sun-bleached blond eyebrow as he watched them sit closer than two guys normally did, even though they weren’t touching. For a second, under the hard gaze, Dillon was tempted to get up and move to the other end of the couch, but he liked being close to Scott, especially with the waves of stress and sorrow that kept washing through him from being in his old home.
“That’s the plan.” Dillon decided to stay where we was. Not move closer to Scott, or farther away. If Robbie doesn’t like it, he’d better work up the balls to say something, or just keep quiet. He’s acting jealous. Maybe he has been wanting more out of me than just friendship.
“Well, it’s been a while since I saw you. Even if we do chat every night.” Robbie raised the footrest and started looking like he lived in the nearly vacant place.
“I can tell you’ve been working at the pool at lot,” Dillon said. “Your summer tan is darker than it was last year.”
“Almost the same color as Dillon,” Scott said.
“I’ve been getting a lot of compliments on it. Sometimes I swear people get into trouble at the pool just so I have to dive in and rescue them.” There was a competitive, gloating tone in Robbie’s voice that Dillon had never noticed before. “I don’t mind some of them. The supervisor said something the other day about me having more rescues this month than the other lifeguards, and he wanted to make sure t
hat I wasn’t trying to make the others look bad.”
“I doubt you were trying.” Scott stretched his arm out across the back of the couch. It didn’t touch Dillon, but Robbie narrowed his eyes at them.
Robbie put the footrest down with a hard slam that stirred up a bunch of cigarette-smelling dust. “Is there something going on that you haven’t bothered to tell me about?” He glared from Scott to Dillon.
“What kind of something?” Dillon asked around the rising knot of fear in his throat.
“Oh, come on, Dillon. I’ve known you for several years. There’s something different about you, and I think Scott has something to do with it.”
Dillon wanted to look at Scott; touching would have been even better, but he kept his attention on his friend. “Robbie, my mother died recently. Yeah, there’s been changes in me. Scott’s been there for me to talk to and work things through with.”
Robbie straightened in the chair as if he wanted to say something, then slouched back. “That’s what I was afraid of. Dillon, I always wanted to be your first. I knew it was only a matter of time before you realized what I saw in you.” He pinched the bridge of his nose. “I don’t think you even realized that you’re the hottest guy in school.”
“I had begun to wonder what you really wanted from me.” Robbie’s defeated body language encouraged Dillon and gave him an inner strength. “So you’re gay. I guess I would’ve been a little surprised during school, but now, I’m not surprised at all. It’s been that kind of summer.”
“And it’s all because of Scott?”
Dillon shook his head slowly. He still wanted to reach for Scott, or look at him, but didn’t feel that it would’ve been fair to Robbie if he did that. “Not all because of Scott. He’s helped me come to terms with things, as has my uncle. But losing Mom almost derailed me, and Scott helped pull me out of it. Without Scott, I’d still be sitting in my room trying to decide if life was still worth living.”
Scott touched Dillon’s lower back and a bolt of warm, pleasant energy flowed into Dillon. But he still didn’t look at Scott.
“And maybe if you’d been here instead of Kerens, it might’ve been me.” Robbie stared at his hands, folded in his lap. “I’d been hoping that we might’ve connected this summer. But now, I can see I have no chance.”
Dillon started to rise from the couch to walk to Robbie when another knock came from the door. “That must be the Goodwill guys.” He stopped next to the recliner and touched Robbie’s shoulder. “Let’s talk about this some more after these guys get done. We can go get a burger.”
Robbie shrugged. “I don’t know.”
The knock came again.
“Coming!” Dillon shouted as he turned from Robbie and finished walking to the door. It hurt him to see Robbie torn up about his developing feelings for Scott. He didn’t like causing anyone pain.
He made it to the door and turned the knob to open it. The door slammed back and caught him in the shoulder, spinning him around and flinging him into the wall. Dillon blinked and turned toward the open doorway. “What the hell?”
Kareem Hassan stood there glaring at him.
21
“WHAT ARE you doing here, Kareem?” Dillon rubbed his shoulder.
“Dill, it’s about time you came back to the hood.” Kareem took a couple of steps into the apartment. “Do you really think it’s smart hiding out in the sticks? That little bit of blood last month scared you that much?”
Staring up at the taller boy, Dillon tried to square his shoulders and look meaner than he felt. “A little bit of blood? Two guys died. Yeah, it scared me!” I wish Scott and I had time to work out a lot. Maybe if I were bigger he might back down. What the hell does he want?
Kareem laughed. It wasn’t a pleasant sound. “They were weak. But then you understand weak, don’t you?”
Dillon continued to stare up at Kareem. “I have no idea what you’re on about. Just leave, Kareem. The Goodwill guys will be here in a few minutes and—”
“Not until I’m done with you, they won’t be.” He sneered.
A sudden wave of fear shot through Dillon. His proud front faltered. “What does that mean?”
“The pickup guy for Goodwill is a Shank.” Kareem slammed the door shut. “When I heard where he was coming, I knew there was a chance that you’d be here. I got lucky, and it’s just you and a couple of friends. Isn’t that right, Robbie?”
Robbie got up from the recliner. “Kareem, why don’t you just go? There’s three of us and one of you. Even if you are bigger than any of us, we outnumber you. If you brought the gang along, they’re outside. We can still get in a few blows before they come through the door.”
Scott appeared on Dillon’s other side. “Go on, and if you’re lucky, you won’t get hurt.”
Kareem’s cold, brown gaze swept over the three of them. It gave Dillon a shiver.
“Yeah, cowboy”—he made the word sound like an insult—“I’m not really afraid of you or these other two. I run the recruitment branch of the Shanks. I’m one of the toughest mofos in this hood. You’re some sad little hick that Dill brought along, and I know Robbie ain’t got nothing in him but a bit o’ show.”
Robbie bristled. “Kareem, you still haven’t gotten to why you’re here.”
“Dill and I got unfinished business. You two go on and do something creative. Maybe they still have a bed in here you can use. Dill’s mama ain’t going to mind.”
“Get out!” Dillon shouted. “I don’t have anything to discuss with you. We never had any business.”
Kareem folded his arms, which looked even bigger than they had at school. “You’re wrong there. The Shanks are the only family you’ve got left in the hood. We want to make sure that you’re safe.”
“I’m not a Shank, and I never will be!”
“You were born to it. Your father started the Shanks.”
Dillon stepped away from Kareem and bumped into Scott’s comforting strength. “My father was a gang member, but he didn’t start the Shanks.” How could Mom have kept that from me? That’s why she freaked out so badly and sent me to Uncle Bryan.
“Your mama never told you, did she? She said he was killed, but she didn’t tell you that he was running the Shanks when it happened. Dill, you’re gang royalty. You’ve always had a place with us. It’s time for you to come home.”
“No!” Dillon stepped closer to Kareem. “I won’t be in the Shanks! Go find your prince somewhere else!” Behind him Scott and Robbie moved with him, their steps echoed on the cheap linoleum. I hope we can get him out of here.
“We’re not looking for another prince right now. You don’t have any more family in Dallas. I checked. I know you’ve been out in the sticks. Figure that’s where you picked up cowboy here. The Shanks are in your blood. There’s nothing you can do about it. You were born as one of us.”
Dillon shoved Kareem in the chest. “Get out of here!”
The big gangbanger wobbled back a couple steps, then stopped. “You just don’t get it, do you, Dill? This isn’t open for discussion. You’re coming with me, even if I have to knock you out and carry you to the moving van that’s waiting for your ratty-ass furniture. If I have to do that, I’ll start by blowing these two away.” He started to reach behind him.
Gun! Shit, he’s got a gun! Dillon shoved Kareem again. This time he staggered back into the door. The gun went off. The sound was deafening. A strange smell of burned flesh came from between Kareem and the door.
Kareem staggered. “Shit, you little asshole! You made me shoot myself in the leg. That’s it. You’re going down. If you’re lucky you’ll wake up on the plane.”
He swung his big fist toward Dillon. Scott moved around Dillon and caught Kareem’s arm and slammed it back into the door. Kareem swung his other hand, holding a gun, hard into the side of Scott’s head. Scott crumpled to the floor and blood flowed from a cut on his temple.
“Scott!” Dillon punched Kareem hard in the nuts. Kareem let out a huge woof of
air and started to bend over, then grabbed Dillon’s leg. “Dammit! I will shoot you, Dillon. I’ll bring your ass down—”
Robbie kicked Kareem in his injured leg. Kareem screamed and swung the gun toward Robbie. The crack of gunfire filled the apartment for a second time. Blood sprayed out from Robbie. Falling back over the recliner, Robbie stopped moving.
“Robbie!” Dillon swung another blow at Kareem. It was a clumsy swing, and Kareem got hold of his arm in an incredibly tight grip.
“Dill, we need fighters.” Kareem squeezed Dillon’s arm hard enough to bring tears to his eyes. “You’re the son of our founder. Even if you have to be taught, you’ll fight alongside us.”
“Never!” Dillon yanked backward, trying to get out of Kareem’s hold.
With a look of incredible pain, Kareem rose to his feet and pulled Dillon’s arm up. “Let’s just drag you out of here. I’m tired of dealing with you.”
Kareem reached behind himself to open the door awkwardly with the hand that still held the pistol. Dillon kicked at Kareem’s legs, but couldn’t get a good enough angle to make an impact the way Robbie had. He glanced at Scott, still lying on the floor bleeding, but at least his chest was still rising and falling. Robbie hadn’t moved since he fell over the arm of the recliner. Dillon couldn’t tell if he was breathing or not.
Kareem got the door open and forced Dillon outside, onto the narrow walkway that accessed the second story apartments. Dillon grabbed hold of the doorframe and yanked himself away from Kareem with his free hand. Dillon went down. The rough wood of the walkway hit his forehead hard, but he forced himself to keep moving and scramble away from Kareem.
“Dammit, Dill, get back here!” Kareem shouted as he staggered.
Two gunshots rang out. Dillon braced himself for impact but didn’t stop moving. A heavy thud sounded behind him. Not looking back, Dillon stayed on his hands and knees and scurried as fast as he could for the stairway that wasn’t far from him.