‘I don’t want to go out with Toni at the moment if it means that I’m going to fight with you, Alice,’ she said finally. ‘I want home to be the best place. For all of us.’
‘But do you want to? Are you in love with him?’
‘Yes. I do love Toni, hon. Not the same way I love you. It’s completely different but very, very special.’
‘I’m sorry I was so awful about it. I didn’t really mean it, you know, about the babies and stuff. I think it would be cool. I’d be like another mother, wouldn’t I?’
‘You sure would. You’d be almost the age I was when I had you.’
‘So you will marry him, then? And have babies?’.
‘I don’t know, hon. He might not want to go out with me any more.’
‘Why not?’ Even in her increasingly drowsy state, Alice’s tone held an indignation that made Pip smile. How could she have doubted the strength of love Alice had for her?
‘I think I hurt his feelings when I agreed that it would be a good idea if we didn’t see each other at the moment.’
‘You mean it was his idea?’ ‘Yes.’ Pip tried to banish the conviction that it would have come eventually, anyway. That Toni didn’t feel the same way. She didn’t want Alice to know how sad that made her. ‘He understands that I’ve got other things in my life that are very important.’
‘Like me?’ Was it Pip’s imagination or was there a satisfied note in Alice’s voice? The knowledge that she was important enough to have been put first.
‘Like you,’ Pip agreed. ‘But there are some other things we need to talk about.’ Like those babies Alice might be a second mother to.
A quiet sound from near the window made Pip realise her mother was awake and had been listening.
‘You should do that, then,’ Shona said. ‘Go and talk to him.’
‘I will,’ Pip responded. ‘He’s busy at the moment and it’s getting late. I’ll do it as soon as I get the chance.’
‘And you’ll tell him that you’re in love with him?’ Alice said.
‘Yes.’
Shona hadn’t been the only person to hear Pip’s conversation with Alice. Toni had to swallow hard to clear the lump in his throat when he’d paused to listen to Pippa singing to her daughter at this quiet end of the ward.
And then he’d waited, not wanting to interrupt that first proper conversation she’d been able to have with her daughter since she’d become so ill.
But he couldn’t wait any longer. Not after hearing that admission that she intended to tell him she loved him. She loved him. His heart singing, he moved to step into Alice’s room.
His smile was a little embarrassed. ‘I couldn’t help overhearing,’ he lied. Then his gaze fastened on Pip. ‘Would now be a good time for that talk, do you think?’
Alice’s grin was weak but much more like her old self. ‘You are so busted,’ she told her mother.
‘I guess I am.’ But Pip didn’t care. In the pale gleam of the nightlight in Alice’s room, she could still clearly see the way Toni was looking at her.
‘Go,’ Shona ordered. ‘I’ll be here with Alice.’
Toni wasn’t looking at Pip any longer. ‘Is that all right with you, Alice?’
‘Sure. But you’ll come back, won’t you, Mum?’
‘Of course I will.’
Shona waved her hand at the couple as Pip slowly walked towards the door and took Toni’s outstretched hand.
‘Play nicely, children,’ she said.
And Alice giggled.
‘She’s sounding so much better.’
‘Isn’t she? It’s like the clock’s been turned back. To before she started having those attacks. Before Mum got sick.’
‘To before we started seeing each other?’
‘Except that I think she sees you as part of the picture now.’
‘Is that what you want, Pippa?’ Toni’s hand pulled her to a stop near the lifts where their aimless wandering had taken them. ‘Do you want me as part of your picture?’
The lift doors were open and, by tacit consent, they both stepped inside. Toni pushed the button to close the doors. He looked at Pip.
‘Yes.’ Pip felt shy because she knew Toni had overheard her telling Alice that she was in love with him but she didn’t know if he felt the same way. Then, having made herself vulnerable to that extent, she knew she may as well go the whole distance. ‘You’re so much part of the picture I want, Toni. You make it bigger. Clearer. The colours brighter. It even has a frame that makes it perfect.’
‘Not a solid frame, I hope?’
Pip could have basked for ever in the look she was receiving. It was so warm. So full of…love.
‘Why not?’
‘Because we might want to make that picture bigger.’
Pip’s heart skipped a beat. ‘You mean…with our own children?’
‘No.’ Toni shook his head quickly. ‘I would never ask you to do something that frightened you too much, Pippa. Or something that you really didn’t want to do. It’s enough for me to be with you. Knowing that we have our whole lives to add to that picture. Places to go. Things to share.’
‘Do you mean you don’t want children?’
‘I mean I want you more, cara. There’s no one else I would want to be the mother of my children so if I don’t have you, I will have nothing. You must know how much I love you.’
‘You…love me?’ The words caused a peculiar tingle that coursed through Pip. She had never felt anything like this. Like liquid hope. Or joy.
Toni was looking perplexed. ‘Of course I love you. I’ve told you many times. Ever since that first night we spent together when you made me burn my spaghetti sauce.’
‘Oh…’ Maybe the meaning of those sexy, foreign phrases hadn’t been as clear as Pip had believed. ‘You told me that in Italian?’
‘Did I? I don’t remember. Maybe. I was speaking from my heart, not my head. I thought you understood.’
‘Maybe I did,’ Pip confessed, ‘but what’s said in bed can sometimes be…not the real thing.’
‘I never say anything in bed I don’t mean.’
Toni’s touch as he pulled her close to him was as convincing as his words. The strength of the love Pip felt for Toni was enough to render her speechless for a moment, but it didn’t matter because he was still talking. Pip could feel as well as hear the low rumble of his words as she revelled in the closeness of their embrace.
‘I love all of you, Pippa. Not just your beautiful body or your clever mind. I love the way you love your mother and your daughter. And if Alice will allow me to be a father to her, I will be honoured, but it’s you I love, Pippa Murdoch—with all my heart and soul. It’s you I want to marry and spend the rest of my life with.’ He bent his head and kissed Pip’s lips. ‘I’ve missed you so much, my love. These last few days have felt like months.’ He kissed her again.
The lift doors chose that moment to open. A startled-looking cleaner had to stop the forward movement of his polishing machine.
‘Sorry,’ Toni said firmly. ‘This lift is occupied.’ He pushed the button to close the doors again and then hit a random floor number so the lift started moving upwards.
‘Now, where we were?’ he murmured. ‘Ah, yes. I think I was asking you to marry me, Pippa.’
‘Were you?’ Pip couldn’t help trying to spin this delicious moment out just a little longer.
‘Most definitely.’
Pip had to wait for another kiss to finish before hearing the words that thrilled her even more than she could have expected.
‘Will you marry me, Pippa? Will you be my love? My wife? And let me love you for the rest of my life?’
‘Yes.’ Pip didn’t bother trying to blink away the tears of joy that sprang to her eyes. ‘I love you, too, Toni. And I love that you think I’m enough for you without having to be a mother again.’
‘You are.’’
‘But I want to be the mother of your children.’ Pip would have had to brush away tears that were now roll
ing down the side of her nose except that Toni was doing it for her. Cradling her face with both hands and using his thumbs to dry her tears. ‘I want to have your babies, Toni. I want you to be a father. Us to be a whole family.’
The smile lit up his face. ‘You really want that? After all you went through with Alice?’
‘I love you enough to make me brave,’ Pip said softly. ‘If I have you with me, I can do anything.’
Toni kissed her yet again. Slowly. Tenderly. ‘You have your mother’s incredible strength, Pippa,’ he said eventually. ‘She told me that love has the power to conquer fear. She said she wasn’t afraid to die because of the love she shared with your father.’
‘She told me something, too.’
The lift was moving downwards again but Toni didn’t seem to notice. ‘What was that?’
‘That it would be nice if she could plan for a wedding instead of a funeral.’
‘She will,’ Toni avowed. ‘And maybe she’ll still be with us for long enough to welcome a new grandchild.’
‘It’s possible.’ Pip would remember this moment of hope and hang onto it for as long as she could. ‘But, just to be on the safe side, do you think we should get married soon?’
‘The sooner, the better.’
The lift doors opened and the cleaner was still standing with his machine on the floor they’d left, his foot tapping impatiently.
Not that Toni or Pip noticed. Wrapped in each other’s arms, their kiss advertised the promise of future dreams and it firmly excluded the rest of the world.
The cleaner sighed wearily and hauled his heavy machine backwards so he could change direction and head for a different lift.
Clearly, his preferred choice was not going to be available for quite some time.
ISBN: 978-1-4603-5913-6
THE ITALIAN DOCTOR’S PERFECT FAMILY
First North American Publication 2007
Copyright © 2007 by Alison Roberts
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