“Yes you do Joshua. You know exactly what I’m talking about.” There was no sway in her movements when she said it. No slur. She looked me dead on, with seriously knowing eyes. The kind that have everything all figured out and can be used as weapons. I looked away, still trying to play dumb, though I knew the mental assault was coming.
“Why don’t you tell me what you think I’m hiding Delia?”
She snickered. “Well, if you insist on playing more games...” Delia gulped more champagne, like it was never going to be forgotten in her head, even if she was clouding it with mind-numbing substances. “An Assessor, in the Lappell,” she began, “is exposed to a lot of interesting deals and very important information. Their secrets, their files, names, places, times and dates. It is information that can potentially expose or bring down this society if it ever got into the wrong hands.” Her eyes then fell to my hands resting on the bench, that were linked together, fingers intertwined.
I lifted my eyebrows, trying to looked shocked at the insinuation. “Are you suggesting I’m the ‘wrong hands’ type of guy?”
“I’m saying, that there are two different kinds of people who choose to be an Assessor in the Lappell, because that role, quite simply puts a big red shiny target on your back. So, you either want to die young, or, you are not as loyal as you make yourself seem.” She cocked her head further as she studied me. “Maybe it’s both. I saw your psych results too. I know how your parents’ death affected you...made you...you know...” She stopped her assessment, knowing she had stepped over a line, looking at me with pity.
I didn’t want her pity. “Just stop Delia. I’m just doing a job, nothing more.”
“No. No, I think not. I think once you disappear with the little princess, you’ll have whatever information you already have stored, sent off to the right people.” She paused for a second, raising one of her fingers in the air, “So who are you going to send it to Josh? The FBI, CIA...the Mob perhaps? I bet all of them would like to get their grubby little hands on what you have.”
I shook my head. “No.”
She pursed her lips. Disbelief still written all over her face. Delia obviously had already made up her mind. I didn’t know how to change her thoughts even if I wanted to. I was more concerned with what she intended to do with her theories. Before I could try and turn her thinking around, she started in on a rant.
“You know you can’t beat them Josh. And you shouldn’t be going away with Norah. You know too much already. You’ll always have to look over your shoulder no matter where you go with her. What her father has planned and set up is an illusion. They will never stop hunting you down. You know that. It’s the role of the Assessor. To die with their secrets. They will figure this out. They will find out you are not dead and then they will come after you. It may not be tomorrow. It may not be for years down the track. But they will find you. Both of you. They lurk everywhere Josh. And you’ll never see them coming. Norah may have had a chance disappearing on her own, but not if you go with her. That’s the brutal truth.”
I rubbed my eyes, trying not to break. Trying not to give Delia the confirmation she was looking for. Knowing what she was saying was right, but not wanting to give Norah up, no matter what the cost or consequence. If she chose me, left with me, then I would protect her. She wouldn’t have any reason to look over her shoulder because I will see them coming. I will always be watching and waiting. I had to.
“You are doing it for her aren’t you?” Delia said softly now. “You’re risking everything to bring them down. Expose them. Gather their secrets and destroy them. Trying to be the David against our Goliath?”
The other truth. Yes, I did have a flash drive with the information Delia was making reference to stored at Norah’s father’s apartment. It was the perfect hiding spot, carefully secured to the back of her mother’s photograph on her father’s desk. The problem with that flash drive was that I had not yet put into place any contingencies. I expected to come back from Europe with Norah as my wife. I did not expect to go into hiding and start a brand new life. Maybe I would never tell anyone it was there. Maybe Norah’s Dad would find it one day and expose the Lappell for me. It was going to be one of those things that I decided would be left up to fate. If I told someone about it now, my supposed ‘death’ would just look more suspicious and the Lappell would definitely hunt us down. It was best I forgot I created it and moved on with my life with Norah.
Delia watched as my mind ticked over. “Norah is my world. I’m not scared to do anything to protect her and our future. I would do anything for her and anything to have her.”
Delia took another long swig, downing the remains of the champagne in the bottle. Her head moving side to side, even more than before. “Yes, my brother’s learned that harsh reality. I see that now too. How far you’ve really gone for Norah. What you are willing to do for her and to have her. It’s all very romantic in lots of ways Josh...” She slid off the stool, “But it’s also fucking tragic too.” She started to walk away back down the hallway she had emerged from, having said her peace. There was no debating with her. I was only concerned with one thing now.
“Are you going to say anything Delia? About...you know?” I yelled out, before she disappeared out of view.
She turned on one of her heels, staring past me and to a window where the sun began to shine through. “No,” she said, slumping into her dress again, looking at me one more time.
A shiver ran up my back. I felt shocked that she wasn’t about to run off and expose me to her supervisor and whoever else she reported to in the E.L. She had figured everything out quickly, just by studying a few pieces of information. The rest of the Lappell would surely catch up, and soon.
“Don’t look so surprised Joshua,” Delia said wiping at her mouth, like she had something on it she couldn’t get off. Her eyes were heavy from the long night mixed with alcohol. “You are not the only person who wants to see this empire fall.” Delia then took off down the hallway, stumbling a bit as she went, not turning back.
I switched my attention to the sunlight now illuminating the kitchen. It was early morning, and there was still no sign of Norah. The whole night had gone by, and before this evening I was supposed to be getting on a plane and leaving with her. Though, I wasn’t convinced it would be me going with her anymore. In the brightness of day, I felt the dark clouds looming in my heart.
I took off towards the gardens. I needed to get out of the house and away from the secrets and lies that followed me in the halls. I walked into the maze and just started wandering around, waiting for her to come find me. Actually it felt more like hope. Yes, I was hoping that she would come find me. I wasn’t sure how much time passed, but soon enough, I could hear her voice.
“Josh are you in here? Josh where are you?”
Am I hearing things now? Am I so tired that I’m dreaming of her voice? It was faint, but it was definitely Norah. I took a chance by yelling into the hedge, “NORAH?”
“Yes Josh, where are you?” she yelled back.
She was in the maze, and she was looking for me. My heart started pounding so hard that it stopped me being able to run and find her because I felt so out of breath. “Run towards my voice,” I managed to scream out as I stood in one spot.
“JOSH.” I heard again. “JOSH.”
“I’m here, I’m here!” I kept yelling hoping to see her face any second. Her voice darted all around me as the sound of her feet stomping on the cobblestones got closer, her yelling more distinct. Then I saw her. Norah was barefoot, wearing jeans over what looked to be a black leotard, her upper body covered in different colored paint. I should have been shocked at the sight of her appearance, but I was so happy that she was running towards me that all I saw was my future getting closer.
When she finally got near me, I saw in her face not happiness, but a face flushed with tears. And they were not tears of joy. Her cheeks had multiple lines of paint that had run down her face so you could clearly see the effect
s of her crying. It was breaking my heart to see her this way. Then, at the moment when I thought she was going to fling her body at mine and hug me, she stopped, frowned at me and then started pounding on my chest with closed fists. She wasn’t pounding hard, just hard enough that she was doing it to express all her pain and frustration. This was the reaction I expected back in Prague. This is what I thought she would do when I told her what I had done to her, Clint and Samuel.
“Why would you do that to me Josh? Why would you do that to Samuel and Clint? Why Josh, why? Why would you manipulate us all? And why would you ask me to go on dates with them after you told me what you did to all of us? Why?”
I wanted to stop her. I wanted to pull her arms away and hold her, but she needed to do this. She needed to finally get all her rage out. She needed to feel the pain of what I did. She needed to express how much it hurt. Because then, and only then, could she maybe forgive, and move forward with me.
“I was going to marry you Josh. I picked you. I chose you. I came all the way here and did what I needed to get you back! And you just pushed me away. You pushed me to them. And it hurts so much that you did that Josh. A small part of me will never forgive you for doing this to me. For showing me what I could have had with those guys and then taking it all away. Why Josh? Why? I just want to do the right thing. I just wanted peace in my heart.”
Her voice was broken by that point, her pounding on my chest starting to change into shoves, and then soft pushes. It was time to hold onto her, and show her how sorry I was. I pulled her into my arms and held her as she sobbed loudly. “I’m sorry Norah. I love you. Please forgive me. Please leave with me. Please tell me you are still choosing me?”
She tensed at the question, and then nodded, unable to say yes, but giving me the answer I needed. “Oh Norah, I will make it all up to you. I will make you so happy. It’s just you and me against the world. Just the two of us now.”
Norah stopped crying when I said the last few words and pulled away, trying to look at my face. She was still shaking, recovering from her sobs as she spoke. “Josh, there is something I need to tell you.”
I shook my head at her. “Norah, whatever you have done with Samuel and Clint doesn’t matter. You don’t have to tell me what you did with them. I don’t want to know. None of it matters to me. The only thing that matters is us leaving together. That’s all. Like I said, just the two of us now.”
Norah grabbed onto my shoulders. She was still shaking. She hadn’t calmed down. “Won’t you listen to me Josh? I’m trying to talk to you. Every time I’ve tried to tell you, we’ve been stopped. I need you to be quiet for just one moment while I tell you...”
Norah’s eyes fluttered, her body giving out from her knees. I had to look twice before I realized she was fainting in front of me. My hands reached out and took hold of her as she became a lifeless weight in my arms. Then from out of the maze, Clint appeared. Shirtless and also covered in paint.
“What happened to her?” he asked. There was an urgency in how he spoke at the sight of Norah passed out.
“She fainted. I think because she got too upset. I don’t know,” I said, a little panicked. Clint ran over to me and helped lay her body down on the ground and onto a patch of grass near the pathway.
“She almost fainted a couple of days ago,” he informed me. “This is the second time Josh. Something is really wrong,” Clint said, studying her face, before looking up at me. He had paint all over his face and I began to wonder how he lost his shirt. I wanted to ask what happened but at the same time I didn’t want to know. I don’t think I could hear about their tryst and what happened between them that made Norah come after me and pound on me, crying the way she did. They obviously had some kind of explosive argument, or an intense discussion that made all her emotions come to a head.
Had I caused all this? Had I pushed everything too far by making her go on these dates after she finally had me back?
I really was ruining her life.
“What happened when she saw you?” Clint finally asked after a few seconds of awkwardness between us. Yet, we both knew this discussion had to happen.
“She was crying. Really angry and upset. She was screaming about how she never wanted to feel this way, and hated what I did to you and Samuel. She was so emotional. She said something about wanting to find peace and that she just wanted to do the right thing. She cried some more and then collapsed in my arms.” I rubbed my lips together, feeling insecure and unsettled. “And then you showed up.” Again the picture of them with paint covering their bodies and Clint not wearing a shirt was raising my insecurity to new highs. I had no right to ask what went down between them because I had put her in that position. She had nodded, saying she was leaving with me, but by the look of it, it wasn’t a decision she made easily.
Clint looked down at her, sweeping her hair across her head, sighing heavily like he had also come to a big decision too. “This has to stop. Us. You and me and Samuel. Pulling her in all different directions. It has to stop. It’s destroying her. It’s destroying the best parts about her.”
“I agree,” I said. Clint was absolutely right. I couldn’t have said it better myself.
His hand remained on her cheek, his eyes on her face. He began speaking to her but it was directed at me. “So...” he began. “You better take good care of her Hollows.” His eyes flicked up to mine. “I mean it. You better be everything she deserves.”
“I will,” I responded, not doubting myself for a second.
“I mean it. You. Better. Take. Care. Of. Her.”
“Clint, it’s what I will spend my life doing.” I looked down at Norah, feeling the words, knowing that without a doubt in whatever time I had left in my life, it would be spent protecting this girl.
Clint touched her face one more time, looking like he hadn’t even noticed I was there. I wanted to break his hand, but I knew I owed him so much more than just a touch. Norah’s head started to move like she was waking up. Her eyes fluttering. Suddenly we heard Tess screaming our names into the maze. It sounded panicked. Clint placed Norah’s head down into my hands and stood up, looking worried as he stared in the direction of Tess’s yelling.
“Clint, I want to say...”
Clint cut me off before I could go into a speech. “I don’t want your apology Josh. I don’t want your excuses for what you did to me and to my relationship. I just need to know that you’ll be that guy for her. The right guy. The one who cares about her, and not himself. Alright?”
Our eyes met, and somehow they told him ‘yes’. I think he could see my remorse and how much I regretted the pain and anguish I had caused him. But I was sure he could see my fear too. He knew how easily he could have her if he wanted to push just a little more. But then he looked at Norah, and any selfish thoughts of staking his claim seemed to disappear. I tilted my head, and looked at her too, her hands starting to twitch.
We heard Tess yelling our names again. “I’m going to see what that is all about. You get her to her feet and bring her out of here so we can get her to lie down in her bed before you both leave this afternoon.” He took a few steps and then turned back to me. “You know it should have been me...you know that...right?”
I did know that.
“Yes, I know that now. And Clint...” I paused for a second, trying to think of something that could accurately describe the relief I had now that he was backing off. I couldn’t come up with anything groundbreaking; just two simple words that meant I would be eternally grateful. “Thank you,” I said. Clint did one quick head nod, accepting my thanks that had more meaning than most things I had ever uttered in my life. He pointed his head down and took off out of the maze to see what Tess was screaming about.
And just like that, Clint had become the gentleman to step aside. The guy knew the true meaning of self-sacrifice. He didn’t want to cause Norah anymore confusion, or heartache, or pain. He was letting me have her, because he knew it was the only way to give her peace. It was no wonde
r that they fell in love. I finally understood what they had together, and what I broke apart.
Norah’s eyes fluttered again and then she moved her head, her eyes now open. “Shhh, I’m here,” I said, stroking her face.
“What happened?” she asked, her voice struggling to come out.
“You fainted. I’m sorry this whole thing has been so stressful. I know it’s been too much. I should have never asked you to go on those dates. It was wrong of me.”
Norah moved until she was sitting up on the ground, resting on her palms. “I fainted?” she asked, looking more confused than ever.
“Yes, I think your body and mind needs to rest.” I helped her to her feet. “Let’s get you up to the house so you can lay down before we leave this afternoon.”
She grabbed my shoulder hard. “Wait Josh. I have to talk to you. I know why I fainted.”
We heard Tess yell again, and this time we heard both our names. Something was happening at the house. Something that required screaming and shouting. I gave Norah a quick kiss on the lips. “We’ll talk tonight, when we are on our way to our new home. Alright?”
“But Josh, this can’t wait any longer. I need to talk to you now.”
Tess’s yelling got even louder. Now I could hear Samuel screaming out our names as well. Something was definitely not right.
“Tonight okay.” I gave her another quick peck on her lips, took her hand and lead Norah out of the maze. We ran out to see Clint and Tess pacing while watching Samuel on his cell.
“Yes I will tell them. Yes they are here.” He was nodding fast. “Uh huh. Yes I know. I understand.” Samuel slammed his cell shut. He looked directly at Norah, looking as confused as I was when I saw her with paint all over her face and body. Samuel then looked at Clint, seeing the same paint-covered look and put two and two together. He shook off whatever was going through his mind and then returned to looking seriously at us all.
All The Pieces (Pieces of Lies 3) Page 19