by Lane, Arie
I don’t say anything else. I just hold her as close as possible and feel her heart as it beats against me, and pray that the baby doesn’t kick the hell out of her so she can get some sleep.
2 Months Later
My deadline is quickly approaching as our wedding is only two weeks away. Almost everything’s ready to go. I just have one piece of unfinished business and it’s my 'make or break' for this wedding. I still haven’t heard from Jacob and I’m starting to lose my mind.
Everything else is set to go. Since it’s become increasingly hot outside, we decided to do the wedding at sunset. A tent is being set up on the beach for the reception. The menu has been perfected. My family and those Marco invited are arriving next week. The only thing undecided is the song for our first dance.
I’m literally running on borrowed time when Jacob calls a week later to let me know he’s obtained the last piece of our wedding puzzle. He might have found her earlier but no one was able to get a hold of Oliver until he finished his assignment. Now that it’s complete, Jacob got the location he needed. He will be back with said cargo in a couple of days, which leaves me no time for last minute details. I inquire about a few things I’ll need to know before he arrives and set to iron out the last minute touches.
Bentley is growing anxious. She’s been stir crazy for weeks since her belly is now so far in front of her she can no longer see the steps and won’t chance going down them unless I’m there with her. Since I’ve had my hands full, I haven’t been around to help her very much, so she’s been confined to our room. It isn’t until the night before the wedding that her rubber band finally winds too tight and she snaps.
“What the fuck is so goddamn important that you can’t spare a few minutes every couple of hours to check on me? I screamed for a half hour earlier when I slipped on the bathroom floor and couldn’t get back up. A fucking half hour I waited for someone to come and help, terrified that the pains shooting through my pelvis might trigger early labor, and your ass was nowhere to be seen. I had to crawl back to our fucking bed once the pains eased enough for me to move, so by all means enlighten me as to what is so goddamn important down there.”
‘Shit, Baby, I’m sorry. I’ve been trying to make sure everything is right for tomorrow. I didn’t even think to have someone check on you. Are you okay? Is the baby okay?” I ask concerned.
“Do I look like I’m okay, Asshole? I have fucking rug burn on both my knees and stomach because all you fucking care about is being married before she arrives. Maybe you should take your head out of your ass long enough to notice that there are more important things than what kind of champagne you’ll be toasting to, and how long you want the goddamn aisle you expect me to walk down to be.”
“I know, Sweetheart. I just want everything to be perfect for you tomorrow. You put your trust in me to make it perfect.”
“Do I look like I give a rat’s ass about your perfect wedding? I’ll be lucky if I can even stand up tomorrow, let alone walk. If you’re so damn concerned about everything being just right, then maybe your ass should sleep out there tonight. God forbid any sand get on the runner, and it would be utterly unacceptable for so much as a single flower petal to be wilted, and don’t forget to spit shine your shoes, and the shine the rings while you’re at it. We can’t have them looking less than impeccable,” she replies sarcastically.
I roll my eyes before grabbing some cream and spreading it across her scraped up skin. Most people would think she’s overreacting, but the doctor told her even the smallest of wrong movements could trigger early labor, so to hear that she fell has me not only worried about her and the baby, but feeling guilty as shit for neglecting her.
It takes forever to fall asleep. I watch her toss for hours, and every time I close my eyes, I wake up to small whimpers. I don’t know if she’s dreaming or in pain, but she flinches each time it happens, and it’s like a jolt of adrenaline. I’m instantly wide awake and keeping watch over her again. There are things the doctor told us to watch for, and I keep checking as she sleeps, but everything looks okay. Sometime shortly before sunrise, I finally fall asleep while holding her as close to me as possible.
When I wake up, it hits me: today is our wedding. I’m more nervous than I have ever been in my entire life. Dante is taking Bentley to a spa for the afternoon so she won’t be around to spy on the happenings around here, and it will help her relax after her ordeal yesterday. By the time she gets back, she’ll need to put on her dress and we’re ready to go. I know today is the moment of truth. It's the start of our future and it has to be perfect. My beautiful bride deserves nothing less.
I smile as all of the pieces come together. I don’t know how Bentley will react to the surprise I have in store for her. She was so upset about not having the things a traditional wedding has, but in actuality, she will. It took months to find her, but Cora will be there standing by her sister’s side as her matron of honor. Her two children will play the part of flower girl, and ring bearer. Bentley will have her perfect wedding.
I’m on pins and needles as sunset approaches and she is nowhere to be seen. I call Dante a good hundred times, and still no answer. I’m thinking the worst possible thought, that Bentley has gotten cold feet and isn’t coming. Maybe after what happened yesterday, she is angry enough to not come. She was really upset when she fell asleep last night, and she was pissed that I tried to lighten the mood. I can’t reach her or Dante, and I never got a chance to speak to her this morning before she left the house.
I watch the sunset, and still she hasn’t arrived. I dread facing the people waiting in their chairs. I really didn’t think when I told her she could leave me at the altar, that she ever actually would. As I approach the front of the aisle to tell them I don’t think my bride is coming, my phone rings. I look down to see Dante’s name flashing, and feel the world fall apart around me as my fear overtakes me. I answer the phone fully expecting to hear the worst. She changed her mind and doesn’t want to marry me.
“Tristan? Tristan are you there? Hello? Shit answer me, Tristan, are you there?” he yells frantically into the speaker.
I’m numb as I reply. “She’s not coming, is she?”
“No, she isn’t fucking coming. You need to get your ass here…like now. Bentley’s water broke. She’s having the baby.”
It takes me a moment to register his words. Wait...what? I’m in fucking shock. She didn’t bail on me. Holy fuck! She’s having the baby! I haul ass back down the aisle as everyone turns to stare at me, not knowing what the hell is going on. I start yelling like a madman.
“I have to go…so sorry. Bentley’s in labor, my baby is coming…we’re having a baby… enjoy the food…”
I don’t think I made any sense as I tear out of the house. I’m not thinking anymore; I’m running on instinct and adrenaline as I speed to the hospital.
I’m standing in the doorway watching my beautiful bride rock our perfect baby girl. I didn’t get to give her the perfect wedding. What I did manage is to get the priest to perform the ceremony before she went into full labor. Instead of spending the night dancing with Bentley, I held her hand as she pushed through the pains to deliver our daughter.
I cried like a fucking baby as the doctor announced our healthy baby girl. She was born at 5:18A.M., and weighed 7 lbs. 3 oz. and she is 20 inches of absolute adorableness. From the moment I lay my eyes on her, I know my life is about to change. From her tiny cries to how fragile she feels in my arms, I’m in complete awe of our tiny miracle. I don’t think she can be anymore perfect until she wraps her tiny fingers around my pinky and grips onto it tightly. I hear people joke about their hearts bursting with joy, and I’m pretty sure mine just exploded.
As I’m rocking her back and forth, she lets out a big yawn and opens her eyes. I’m disappointed to see her eyes are a dark blue, as I really hoped they would be the color of Bentley’s. Bentley sees the small frown and asks what is wrong. When I explain, she laughs at me and tells me babies are usually
born with blue eyes, but they usually change once the baby gets a little older. So I’m holding out hope. After all, she already has a full head of dark brown hair and two perfect little dimples. She’s well on her way to being her mommy’s mini.
Patience is not my virtue, and I’m struggling to wait as I try to hide the box I’m holding in my lap. Bentley hates gifts. She’s always complains that I spend too much on her. She has no fucking clue just how much I want to give her. Money is of little consolation to me, as I have my father’s fortune with nothing and no one but her and the baby to spend it on. If I thought she’d let me, I’d buy her the world.
I stand up and walk around her bed. Leaning over her, I move the box into her lap and open the lid. I hold my breath as I wait for her reaction.
She lets out an audible gasp, “Tristan, it’s gorgeous, but I can’t…”
I cut her off before she can finish that sentiment. “Don’t tell me you can’t accept them, Bentley,” I say as more of a plea than a request. “You’re the only person I’d ever give them to. These belonged to my mother. They are the only trinket I have of hers and I want you to have them. I want you to wear them as a reminder of how much I love you, how much I’m in love with you, Bentley. I can’t think of any other person in the world more deserving than the mother of my child, so please don’t tell me you can’t.”
She doesn’t say anything else as the tears run down her face. She just lifts her hair off of her neck as I clasp the pearls around it. When she picks her head up and turns to face me, I damn near lose it. There is something about seeing a treasure that belonged to my mother, wrapped around the neck of girl that I love, that just sets me off. Aggie was right. Bentley is my forever and I’ll spend a lifetime making her believe it if I have to.
I watch as she runs her fingers across the pearls and traces the twin hearts. These hearts remind me of both her and me, entwined and fated to be forever together, and if separated, it would destroy them. It is the perfect way to let her know how much I love her, and how amazing of a mother I think she’s going to be.
Today will be perfect. We are bringing our baby girl home in just a few short minutes, and we will be introducing her to a family who will love and protect her unconditionally. It’s one thing I know without a doubt. After so many months of Bentley living with her fears and doubts, she is finally ready for this.
I’ve known a lot of happy moments with Bentley, but for the first time, I know what it’s like to feel complete. I watch as she wraps Audrey Iliana up, placing a tiny knit hat over the full head of darkened hair already framing her tiny face. She isn’t even two days old and yet she already had us both wrapped around her tiny little fingers. She is so beautiful, and from the first time she looked up at me, and I stared into her twinkling sapphire eyes, I’ve been completely enchanted.
We decided to wait until we got home to announce her to everyone. As of this moment, she is simply baby Reece. Everyone is waiting for our arrival as we pull into the drive. I know Maddie, Andy, Mrs. Anders, and my aunt hauled ass to throw together a homecoming. I had been so busy with the wedding that I never took the time to make up the nursery. It was on our list to do after the wedding since we weren’t going on a honeymoon until after the birth. With her going into labor early, the room was still empty.
Everyone pulled together to get it done. Bentley doesn’t know yet, but that nursery she was checking out in the catalog is now sitting upstairs in the room next to our own. I have an idea of what I’m walking into, but Bentley has no idea whatsoever. I never expected the overwhelming love either of us we would feel when we walked through that door. I thought this day would be about her and the baby; instead, they made it about all three of us...our family.
I watch my beautiful Bentley come undone as her sister wraps her in a hug. We kept her being here as a surprise, so when she saw her for the first time in eight years, she came undone. Whether it’s her heightened emotions or utter shock, I smile with pride as I watch her tears of joy and gratitude run down her face. I promised her the world, and I intended to make good on that delivery.
Marco is beside himself with joy as he holds his new granddaughter, and as Bentley laces her fingers through mine, I know it’s time. I bite my bottom lip, and listen as she makes her announcement.
“Everyone, Tristan and I would like to introduce you to Audrey Iliana Reece,” she says proudly.
Bentley
To say I’m terrified standing in front of my family holding this tiny baby girl is a drastic understatement. I keep trying to convince myself that I’m ready for this, but I’m not sure all the preparation in the world would have me ready. Sure, I have the perfect nursery, all of the best gadgets, and finest clothes, yet I still can’t convince myself that I will love her the way she needs to be. What if it’s ingrained in my subconscious that I will be nothing but a failure? What if when she is old enough to see me as I am that she hates me, that she thinks me weak and undeserving? What if she doesn’t think I’m worthy of her love? All of these doubts are plaguing my every thought.
I let my thoughts fester and eat at me until I look around my home at all of these people who have gathered to see our beautiful Audrey. Then it happens, the one thing that makes my whole world turn on its axis and set every irrational fear I have right: my baby girl opens her eyes and smiles up at me. It isn’t the smile she gets when she’s gassy; no this one is special. Everyone is being ushered into the living room, and I’m quietly singing her one of my favorite lullabies. Just as I finished, she clasps onto my finger tightly and gives me the most beautiful smile I’ve ever seen.
I don’t give a second thought to all of the hatred my mother fed me. I don’t let another doubt about my ability to love her cloud my mind. I know for certain that I will love my little girl more than life itself, and with her and Tristan, I finally have the family I’ve longed for so long.
Every once in a while I stare out at my star and smile, because several months ago I wished for just a small piece of perfection. I wanted something perfect to call my own, and I got my wish twice. I have the perfect husband, who no matter what fault I may have, who loves me unconditionally. And I have a perfect little angel that we get to call our own.
Epilogue
4 Years Later
Since I promised Bentley the wedding of her dreams, and the closest we got was taking vows between contractions, I thought it only fair I get a do over.
This time though, I don't rush it. We take the time to plan every detail out, and this time she'll have the most precious flower girl on the face of the earth. Little Miss. Audrey is more than excited to be in charge of tossing the flower petals, not to mention the pretty pink princess dress she insists is a must for the occasion.
Sadly, Bentley will still be sporting a baby bump. She doesn't really mind one bit though. Not when in just a few short months she'll be bringing another perfect baby into this world, and giving Audrey the little sister she's been begging for.
Everything is once again perfect for her special day. This time Cora is already waiting to stand by her side. Dante, who was more than willing to don a dress, looks dapper in his white tux. Marco, who's waiting to walk his daughter down the aisle, is fighting back tears. And I'm nervous enough that I take it upon myself to double check she's actually here this time.
Aggie told me it’s bad luck to see a bride on her wedding day, but I can't help but stare at the beautiful vision I see through the slightly opened door. I'm in a state of bliss as I watch Bentley twirling Audrey around the room, and thank my lucky stars to have the family I never knew I was missing. Once in a while Bentley has her doubts, but Audrey and I remind her daily just how amazing she truly is at this motherhood thing.
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