Unfortunately, that became more and more difficult as the minutes passed. As powerful static electricity rippled through the air from Tamyra’s powers, and blood splattered my face from Damien’s newest kill, I felt my control slipping. The darker side of me purred happily, rising from the depths of my soul, she surged forth, hungry for death and destruction. She thrived on blood and the suffering of others, this darker side of me. The more Niada attacked me, the more I fought back, the more my tenuous control slipped. I tried to hold her back, to keep her locked within her cage, but those bars were long broken, and my hunger had become an intense need.
In the back of my mind, I heard him again. The voice brought with it the distinct mixture of grief and anger thoughts of him seemed to stir. In that incredibly sexy, deep baritone that was at the same time cold and sensuous, he embraced my soul.
“Valkyrie, fight it. You can control her. You need to keep fighting, don’t give in. Every time you give in to her, she grows stronger. You need to be strong. You can do this.”
Closing my eyes, I swallowed as the hot rush of moisture stung the back of my eyes. I knew no tears would fall down my cheeks, I had learned that long ago, but still I could feel the emotions in me rising, the need to cry almost painful. My throat felt thickened, and my heart hurt.
“Go away, Aeron. You’re not real. You’re only a figment of my imagination, something I made up to help myself cope with your loss.”
His voice came again, flushing my body with need and desire. “My beautiful Valkyrie, please. Trust me. You did not make me up.”
Squeezing my eyes tighter, my jaw clenched. I couldn’t go on like this. I couldn’t keep holding out hope for something I knew was never going to happen. I couldn’t keep wanting someone who was never coming back. This was torture, hearing his voice in my mind. Why did I continue to do this to myself? Why couldn’t I just let go? Shaking my head, I felt again the anger that often came along with his voice. I was angry. I was mad at the world and myself. If I had been able to control myself before, I never would have killed him. If I had been wiser, I would have seen through the charm and to the deception that was Desmond.
But I was weak. I was stupid and weak. I had wandered straight into the trap Desmond had laid for me like an animal lead to slaughter. Because of me Aeron was gone. Because of my foolishness I would never know the extent of the feelings I really felt for him, or know if he could care for me again. That chance was gone, and it was all my fault. Violence welled up inside of me as I wallowed in my grief and guilt.
Opening my eyes, I studied Niada. She had grown so tall, she had to hunch over to keep her head from hitting the ceiling of the steel room. Her body had become a massive green trunk, with cords of thick vines wrapping themselves protectively around her. Her long arms and vine-like fingers were pointed at me as she cast spell after spell at me. Static sizzled through my hair, causing it to rise around my head. Wind blew against us as Tamyra drove another Witch into the hard steel wall. Glancing over my shoulder, I looked for them.
I could not see their forms, but I could see where their powers erupted. Damien paused over the fallen body of a man, and he looked up at me as if sensing my thoughts. His dark muzzle was covered with blood, and his lips were curled back away from his long sharp canines. His eyes were primal, feral and wild. For a brief moment, I wondered if Damien the man were still present, but as he held my gaze, I could see he was there, in control still. Tamyra and Valkyrian materialized behind him, their true forms becoming visible once more.
I smiled as I took in Tamyra’s mahogany hair, standing on end around her head, crackling with electricity. Moving my gaze to the intense green eyes of my brother, I held his a moment, thinking of how much I loved him. Swallowing the lump of emotion still lodged in my throat, I knew it was time.
I held their gazes, making sure they understood my words as I said them. “Get out. Now!”
Watching their receding backs, I closed my eyes again, but this time, I closed them in bliss. Pure, unaltered bliss washed through me as I flung my control out the window and allowed all the anger and violence I had been harboring since the day Desmond captured me to surge forward and take over. When I opened my eyes, I witnessed the fear that quickly permeated the air around me, and the image of terror that crept into Niada’s eyes was absolutely delicious.
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A hot fire ignited not only on my skin, blazing brighter than normal, but also around the room. Everywhere Niada’s roots spread, so did my fire. My fangs had elongated, on full display, and I knew my eyes had changed. When I lost control, the inky blackness of my soul crept into even them. My body was like charcoal, and my reaper wings flickered, licked by flames behind me. They twitched in agitation as the hunger within me built to a crescendo. I was death and chaos. I was fire and pain. I was a Reaper. Strolling forward nonchalantly, I smiled wickedly at the smell of charred plant and flesh that seeped into my senses.
The thick trunk that protected Niada was quickly falling away from her in withering, burning chunks. Niada shrieked in agony, her Niamph form rendering her unable to escape. As she shrank back to her normal size, I advanced. She had a sickly sweet smell to her, beckoning me, assaulting me with its heady aroma. Niada was panicking. She cast spells at me rapid fire, but they stopped inches from me, as though coming up against an invisible force field.
Seeing her soft delicate flesh become visible once more, I felt my hunger deepen. Advancing, I stabbed the tip of one boney wing into her shoulder, pinning her in place. Listening to her screams, I smiled.
“You seduced the man I loved. You filled his head with evil thoughts, and you corrupted a man who was once good.”
Whimpering, Niada squirmed, blood dripping down the front of her shoulder where my wing pierced her skin. Her eyes were full of fear, the kind you feel when you knew you were about to die. I felt violence and anger welling up within my dark soul as I looked down into her dark empty eyes. This woman had stolen Desmond from me. She had turned him into the wicked creature he was now.
“Please…please…it wasn’t me! I…I didn’t know what I was doing…I was possessed! Please, have mercy!” Her eyes were wide, her lower lip trembling.
Staring into the black, fearful eyes of this Witch, I knew the words she said were lies. She would say anything to save her pitiful hide. There wasn’t a doubt in my mind that she was guilty of seducing and turning Desmond so long ago. Closing the gap between us, I sunk my fangs into the deliciously soft curve of her throat, sighing as the metallic sweetness of her blood warmed my mouth. Closing my eyes, I waited for the images I knew would come.
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Darkness surrounded her. She hid in a forest filled with massive, old trees, and firelight flickered in the distance. I could hear voices chanting words I didn’t understand. In the image, Niada was much smaller, probably just a child. She crept forward, peeking through the dense ferns and underbrush as she attempted to see into the clearing. Fire danced in a hearth in the center of the large clearing, and half naked people danced around it. They held unusual instruments in their hands, and wove songs with their unusual guttural chants.
Niada crept ever closer, spurred by the curiosity of a child. Her skin faded from deep green to the soft cream of her human skin. Her dark eyes were wide with wonder and curiosity. In her haste to get a closer look, the child tripped, falling half-way into the clearing. The dancers around the fire halted, caught off guard and alarmed. Moving forward, their deep red skin illuminated in the firelight, they circled the child. Niada looked up at them with trepidation, her child’s face filled with fear.
A man reached down, grabbing her by the arm and hauling her up. The others starred at
her as they pulled her towards the center, closer to the fire that burned there. After a minute, the people began to speak loudly in a language she couldn’t understand, nor could I. Their voices rose in tone and sounded as though they had become excited. Pulling the child into their circle, they began to dance
around her, cheering and chanting loudly.
Smoke swirled around the edges of my vision, and the images I saw began to fade. I could feel Niada’s powers struggling against mine as she attempted to fight me off. She didn’t like me seeing into her memories, and it made me grit my teeth, digging in even deeper. There was no doubt in my mind that she was hiding things she didn’t want me to see. Sending a surge of my strength against her, we fought in a battle of wills for several moments before I felt her weaken and recede.
Again I was blinded with images from her mind. They flashed and clashed into one another in a mad whirl as my mind tried to slow them down and sort through them. What it was I was looking for, I was not certain. Filtering through her memories, I saw things I didn’t need to see, and wished I hadn’t. Growing weary of all the pictures presented to me, I was about to give up, when I saw a face that brought my mind to an instant halt. Dark hair, blue eyes. Strong, overpowering features and the hawk-like nose.
The blue of his eyes pierced into my soul, penetrating deep, for I knew those eyes well. Eyes I had seen since the day of my birth. The face I saw belonged to a young Byron Walker. I could see he was younger, more carefree. He was laughing with other men, a goblet held in his hand, and a smile on his face. He was looking at me, which told me, he was looking at Niada. I watched the memory as though I were Niada. Byron turned away from the men, smiling at Niada. Bowing his head slightly, he walked her way.
In his blue eyes, I could see intense interest, and it made me confused. When had he met Niada? Surely not after my mother and he had met? Shaking off my own questions, I tried to focus on the vision I was being shown. When he reached up, I nearly felt the moment his arms wrapped around Niada, and he swept her into a graceful dance. I heard her voice as she laughed, and I saw the answering glint of attraction light in the eyes of the man who had once been my father.
My mind stuttered to a halt for a second, and the images faded. I shook my head in desperation, sinking my fangs deeper into her throat. I needed to see, needed to know the connection she had to Byron. Inside me, darkness welled up, its claws ripping deeper into my heart, drawing blood, and feeding off the sickly sweetness of the fear that tinged Niada’s blood. My breathing became shallow, my pulse sped up to an unbearable rhythm too fast to possibly follow. I knew what was happening. Closing my eyes, I tried to keep my darkness from killing her before I knew the truth. My strength was wavering while the blackness of my soul grew.
Heat coursed through me, deliciously intense heat, and my flames burned brighter. The steel above me dripped rivulets of silvery liquid, heated to its melting point. Inside, I roared. The blood in my mouth crystalized like sugary sap, and for a fleeting moment, another vision flashed in my mind. Byron fucking Niada. I could hear her moans, see the flex of muscles across his back as he drove into her. I gaged.
In a weakened voice that was laced with sarcasm, even as she faded, Niada said, “It must eat you alive to know that the humans you seek to protect are the things you crave most…their blood haunts you, and yet, you still fight your deepest, most carnal cravings…”
The vision in my mind dissipated, and my eyes snapped open, looking deep into Niada’s black eyes. In a final act of desperation, I used all the combusting energy within me to create an explosion, tossing her limp body through the opening in the ceiling caused by my intense heat, I sent her toward those who waited for me. Nearly drained of all her blood, she was beyond weak, she was like a life-less corpse. I stared after her body as it flew through the air, propelled by the blast I created. I hoped Valkyrian and Tamyra would find it. With a deep inhale, I closed my eyes, just as the fires of my blackened soul overtook me.
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11
He Who Haunts Me
Floating in the black oblivion around me, I sighed as peacefulness surrounded me for the first time in so long. My eyelids fluttered, and I looked around the void in which I existed. I had no idea what was happening, and currently, I didn’t really care. I felt…free. A small laugh escaped me as I realized how utterly amazing it felt not to have the weight of the world sitting on my shoulders. Perhaps I could stay here, wherever here was. If I never awoke from this blissful plane, what would become of the world? The thought filled me with anger. I didn’t want to care about the rest of the world. I wanted only this deep feeling of nothingness.
It was perfection, fulfilled desires, and complete contentment here in this black void. I longed for nothing and no one. I needed nothing. Here, there was no pain, no heartache, no unrelenting emotion I couldn’t even release. Here there was only peace. I wondered if I had died, a final death where no resurrection would await me. What would it be like, I pondered, to know that when you died, you would not come back? Would it make you afraid of death? Would it make you seek it out in times of torment? Is that why people committed suicide? To find this state of utter nothingness? No, I didn’t think that was the reason.
I had considered it, many times, since losing Aeron. I had contemplated what it would be like, to die an eternal death with no chance of returning. I wasn’t sure if it was even possible for me. When Desmond held me prisoner, I hadn’t died and been reborn. I had withered away to nearly nothingness, I had become weak like a human, but still unable to die. Now, I realized the possibilities were different. Now, I was free, I was only me. I no longer wore that amulet which Rafael had believed kept me alive. Now, I had only myself.
The void around me was everlasting, endless, and unchanging. Turning my head left and right, my gaze roved around the infinite black in which I lay suspended. Calling out, I asked, “Hello? Is anyone there? Have I died?”
Nothing answered me, and nothing changed. I released a breath, wondering why I still entertained my own thoughts if I were truly dead, when I noticed it. A shift, like a small vibration in the void. Watching, I thought I must have imagined it, but wait…there it was again, bigger this time. The blackness gave way to a light, bright red-orange, like the lick of flames. I loved fire. The thought brought a smile to my lips. It was true. I loved the heat of flames, the twisting dance of them as they devoured anything they touched…like me.
A feeling of such intense melancholy washed over me then, and I nearly sobbed from the emotions it evoked. No! I didn’t want this new feeling! I wanted the peaceful bliss I had found here. Why now was I feeling such horrible sadness? My eyes misted, and to my stunned disbelief, I felt warm wetness trickle down my left cheek. Lifting a finger, I gently lifted the tear from my face, turning my hand over to study it. It glowed like fire on my fingertip, a tiny ball of molten fire. So, even my tears were forged in flames.
A scent assailed me, and I lost interest in the molten tear. My gaze wandered back to the light in the darkness, and I sucked in a breath as I watched a being form there. Flames licked their shape, and for just a second, I saw the image of a phoenix form there in the flames. Closer the being moved to me, until their form solidified, the flames falling away slowly, and then, only a man stood there looking down at me. My breath caught, my heart seized, and another tear of liquid fire ran down my cheek. Surely I was not seeing what I thought I was…
“Is this all that’s left of the light within you, my beautiful Valkyrie?” His voice permeated every fiber of my being, zipping through my neurons and igniting sensations all over my floating form.
Gasping, I struggled to stand. When I had managed to maneuver my body through the void until I stood before him, I sucked in deep breaths. “Aeron? This cannot be possible. You’re dead. I must be dead.”
He took another step forward, closing the gap between us, and I felt the hard contours of his body come into contact with mine. A long exhale left my lungs, and without choosing to, my body relaxed into his. My cheek came to rest against his hard chest, and his arms encircled me, holding me tight.
“I think you and I both know the truth to both of those statements, Valkyrie,” the hidden meaning in his words reverberated through my muddled mind, and I lifted my eyes to his face.
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The unusual multi-hued color of his eyes was ringed by a band of fiery orange, and I realized they had been like that before, the day he kissed me in his kitchen. “What do you mean?”
Aeron chuckled as his eyes caressed my face. His hands ran up my side, over my hips, and along the sides of my breasts, causing a shudder to course through me. “You cannot die, my sweet, dark Valkyrie.”
Tilting my head to the side, I tried to keep my gaze from trailing to his tantalizingly arousing lips, but my will seemed nonexistent, and that’s exactly where my eyes settled. “And you, Aeron?”
Silence fluttered around me in deafening waves, and it took every ounce of will power I possessed to lift my gaze back to his enchanting eyes. The fire-like band encircling his iris flared brightly for the briefest moment. He let out a long breath as he whispered, “I don’t yet know…”
Pulling back slightly, I tried to push him away. “How do you not know? Isn’t that what this is? Death? If you are here with me then I know I am dead, Aeron.”
Refusing to release me, Aeron’s arms tightened like steel bands around my waist, pulling me roughly back to him. I blinked when I realized I could feel the hardness of his arousal pressing against my hips, and I shook my head, confused. Surely, if this was the void of death, he wouldn’t be hard and aroused…would he? My eyes flickered to his once more, and I felt the deep frown marring my features. “Aeron?”
With a sadness, his eyes roved over my face. “Valkyrie, I…I don’t know what this is. It’s where I’ve been…but it cannot be death. If I am dead, then why do I feel you? Why do I hear your thoughts when your moods are the saddest? If this is death, then why do I see pieces of what you see?”
Valkyrie Divided (Pyralis Book 2) Page 12