Rebirth

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Rebirth Page 19

by Valerie Willis


  What an amazing job Lilly!

  Hotan made his way out of the dimly lit industrial section of town as the sun began to set and a few highway lamps began to flicker on. He shoved back the thoughts and information that had flooded itself onto him despite the etched images of the work Lilly had performed.

  I have to go see Shellie. I hope she’s not pissed with me.

  He made it to a familiar road that would put him on the expressway closer to home. Luckily, rush hour had ended hours ago. The ride was smooth despite the cold night air that hit his exposed arms and body through his thin shirt. He enjoyed how the ride was more relaxed and almost effortless with the redesign. The engine hummed softly as he made his way to the exit and taking caution as he made a right turn adjusting to the change. As he pulled up, there were no vehicles in Shellie’s driveway, but the living room light was on. The doorbell rang out behind the closed door.

  Shellie has to be here.

  After a few minutes he heard the clicking of the lock and the door cracked open cautiously. A smile of relief crept across his face.

  “Hey,” Hotan could see she was indifferent about the sudden visit. “You ok?”

  “Hey,” She gave him a smile as she opened the door wider letting him in. “Mom and Dad are at a business party and won’t be home till real late. What brings you here? Are you ok?”

  “You.” Feeling the weight of his guilt ease off, his mood was improving. “I was thinking about you all day today. Feeling guilty about not calling like I used to, and not giving you a minute of my time in the last few weeks. Sorry, Shellie.”

  “You know I don’t get mad about that kind of stuff. You’re dealing with a lot, and asked for some space to deal with it. I can’t blame you for at least being straight forward.” She hugged him taking in a deep breath of his scent, which she had grown to miss. “But I am glad to see you, much better than a phone call.”

  “I know, but it still doesn’t give me the right to completely neglect you.” He lifted her chin up, staring deeply into her eyes.

  I just wish I could see those eyes in color again.

  “You shouldn’t worry so much, Hotan.” She brushed some of his hair behind his ear. “I’m a big girl.”

  “Well then, forgive me. I completely forgot you were.” He leaned in and kissed her soft warm lips. Her lips were sweet tasting and the firm push they gave back to his sent his pulse running. Pulling her close and tight, he let his troubles melt away, embracing her warmth.

  I am so sorry for going so long without you.

  “Are you ok Hotan?” Her voice came out shaken as she nuzzled her head in his shoulder. “You’re acting weird. You’ve never been this loverly with me before.”

  “I don’t know.” His sigh was heavy; sounding like it had been pressed into the ground by a great force. “I don’t know anymore. I just went too long without you and realized I wasn’t being fair to you. That I do need you more than I had thought. You’re the only thing I have that makes me still feel human.”

  They didn’t say much to each other, as they snuggled on the couch pretending to pay attention to the movie that was flashing across the television. It was a joy being so close to her and not thinking of anything. He had seen Lilly’s amazing ability just hours before, but that didn’t matter. Miracles, immortals and their powers were no longer on his mind. He just wanted to swim in the warmth of Shellie’s heart and be himself, not the boy trying to fill the place of the abandoned leader of the immortal Levites. Just plain Hotan. Hotan, who goes to a high school, has a band and most importantly, has someone he loves and would do anything in the world to keep her there by his side safe.

  Hotan… A familiar voice rang in his head.

  Who is this? He responded straightening himself on the couch, annoyed that the moment with Shellie was breaking.

  Talib. He took a deep breath as he sat there silently feeling the weight of his stress creeping back into him.

  What do you want? Didn’t expect to be talking to you so soon again. He felt like holding his breath, hoping that his earlier thoughts were left unheard.

  I just wanted to apologize for the other night. Talib’s voice was deep and heavy with sorrow. I, I am just not sure if now is a good time to add to the stress you are already under. With what Jacob and I had mentioned, I just felt it was not a good time to add to your shoulders just yet.

  Understandable, Hotan leaned back into the couch staring at the ceiling, but it seems like recently I’m the one causing myself the most stress. We can start again if that helps.

  How so? Talib’s pace had quickened revealing the unconditional concern he had for Hotan. What would you like me to do?

  I’m not up for talking about it right now. He took a deep breath, holding back the millions of thoughts that had plagued his mind. Maybe another day I’ll be willing to share, but tonight’s not going so well. I am tired and frustrated. We can meet up later on.

  You are not in some sort of trouble?

  Nothing I can’t handle. Normal life kind of trouble, nothing in regards to the ‘my special abilities’ and what not. He closed his eyes kicking himself for the mess he had found himself in regarding the old Hotan and Cassandra’s attack. I’ll be fine. Just need some rest.

  If you ever need me, There was a long pause from Talib before he finished, you can find me at the Cathedral.

  “You ok?” Shellie was staring at him, observing his ever-growing tension consume the muscles in his face. “You look super tense? You feeling ok?”

  “Uh,” Hotan looked over at her slightly startled. “Yea…”

  “Relax.” She smiled and kissed him on the forehead. “It’s okay, Hotan. I’m not mad at you.”

  “Hey, Shellie?” He grabbed her hand.

  Furrowing her brow she looked him in the eyes, concern washing over her face, “Yea?”

  “I love you.”

  “I love you too.” Her cheeks red, she grinned in her excitement. “But I still think you are acting weird.”

  For the rest of the night he sat there on the couch with her, holding her close as they watched random movies.

  I have tried so hard all this whole time to keep our relationship mutual and uncomplicated, but for what reason? For the first time I feel like our relationship is complete and more stable than ever before. The question is, does she truly feel the same?

  He looked down at her, with her head resting against his chest. They sat in utter darkness with only the television giving off light. She looked sleepy and secure as she focused on the movie. He hugged her closer taking in a deep breath. There was the sound of two car doors shutting followed by the muffled sounds of chatter and laughter outside. Keys rattled and the sound of the door unlocking. Her parents came through the door in their formal attire from the evening’s event.

  “Well! Look here, Doris!” Shellie’s father boasted, his cheeks red from alcohol and his mustache slanted across his face as he smirked. “We caught them in the act! Shame on them!”

  “Oh, Henry!” Doris giggled delightful that her little girl hadn’t spent the whole night by herself. “Where have you been, Hotan? It seems ages since I saw you last.”

  “Oh, just working a lot Mrs. Rubenstein.” They both straightened their posture. “Keeping busy with school, the band, grabbing up side jobs where I can.”

  “You’re just saying that.” Henry gave him two hard smacks in the arm as they passed by. “But I like the sound of it!”

  “Was everything ok, baby?” Doris kissed Shellie on the cheek, patting her on the head.

  “Yea, Mom, Hotan showed up not too long ago, but everything is fine.” She stifled a yawn stretching out her arms. “Would it be ok if I stayed the night at Hotan’s?”

  “Uh,” Hotan looked down at Shellie then back up to her parents, feeling his face turn.

  What is she thinking? They would never let her stay the night at my place. A teenage girl, staying the night at a delinquent’s apartment, and she didn’t even ask me!

&n
bsp; “Oh.” Her mother gave a clueless expression. “Henry, what do you think?”

  “Hmm,” Her dad gave him the stare down and after a few minutes cracked a big smile. “Well Shellie’s a big girl and smart at that. I don’t see the harm in it. Just bring her back in one piece or else!”

  My head is on the chopping block for sure now. “Uh, yes sir.” He shot a look at Shellie, baffled at the sudden suggestion.

  She must have known they would say yes, but...

  “You’ve got all day tomorrow to bring her home!” Her mother smiled sweetly.

  “Thanks!” Shellie jumped up to hug both her parents. “I promise to be good! We have a lot to work on for the band. At least this way you don’t have to hear me practice in the morning!”

  “Oh yes! A quiet morning will be needed after as much as I drank! I trust you’ll take good care of her tonight.” Henry shook his hand, crushing it with his bare paws to send the message well. “She’s the only daughter I have Hotan.”

  “Yes sir, I know.” He returned the hand-crushing squeeze that all men exchange, a silent exchange of respect and strength. “Besides, we have to go to 7even’s early tomorrow for auditions.”

  “Oh! What are you auditioning for?” Her mother’s face filled with interest.

  “Well, we’re judging some people who are trying out for Shellie’s place in the band.” He sighed as he scratched the back of his head, still perplexed.

  “I’m one year under the minimum age limit so we decided to give the band a chance even if I have to sit out on this competition.” Shellie shrugged as she glanced over at him still smiling.

  “Well that’s very big of you.” Her dad patted her on the back. “Well, your mom and I are exhausted. I’m sure you two are ready to head out by now.”

  “Good night, Baby!” Her mom once more hugged and kissed her as they made their way down the hall to their bedroom.

  “Ok, I’ll be just a minute.” She raced off into her room.

  Befuddled, he stood up stretching out his back. Hotan found himself grinning, amused at the fact that she had put him on the spot like that. After a few minutes, she came back with a black jacket and a backpack full of her things. They both took a minute to strap their helmets in place before pulling out of the driveway, heading for his place. She hugged his waist tighter than usual, then again, it had been a while since she had ridden on the bike. The fact it rides completely different even made him nervous.

  She followed just behind him, neither one of them speaking as they made their way upstairs. Unlocking his door, he allowed her to enter first and trailed in behind her. Tossing her bag onto the couch, she slid her jacket off. He opened his fridge, leaning on the door as he scanned through the items. It wasn’t the he was hungry, or even thirsty. All he wanted was a moment longer to think, What possessed her to want to come home with me? Should I even have allowed her to?

  “Thirsty? Hungry?” He glanced over at her.

  “No thanks, I had pizza before you showed up.” She stifled a yawn.

  “Ok,” Taking a quick swig out of the orange juice container, he walked into the living room rubbing the back of his neck. “I don’t know about you but I’m tired as hell. You kind of put me on the spot there, Shellie. Um, you can sleep on the couch or the mattress, doesn’t matter to me. Your choice.”

  “Yea, I’m getting pretty sleepy myself.” She stood up walking over to him and hugged him. “If you don’t mind, I want to snuggle with you tonight.”

  “Ok, a mattress on the floor isn’t much.” He could feel heat in his cheeks as he led her into the bedroom where his infamous mattress laid on the bare floor scattered with clothes. With a sigh he muttered, “And it’s never clean.”

  “Wow, not into bedroom furniture at all, are you?” She grinned at him, “No worries, I don’t plan on doing anything with you tonight. I just wanted more quiet time with you, that’s all.”

  “I promise the sheets and comforter are clean.” He kicked off his shoes and threw his shirt to the ground. “Quiet time you shall have. I am not going to be awake for much longer. Today was insane, yesterday even crazier, so for once I actually want to sleep.”

  “I’m not worried about that.” She crawled on the mattress, scooping up and hogging one of his pillows.

  “I should have made you bring your own pillows.” He left on his jeans and flopped down beside her, pulling her close to him. “I can always use you as my pillow.”

  “Good night, Hotan.” She kissed him on the cheek and snuggled herself on his chest and shoulder.

  “Night, Shellie.” Kissing the top of her head, he took in a deep breath of her smell and quickly dozed off.

  He woke to the smell of something cooking. Shellie was no longer in bed with him, and he was hugging his pillow where she had been last night. Rubbing his eyes, trying to remove the sleep from them, he stretched out his legs and arms. It had been a long time since he slept that well especially since all of this chaos had started. She was busy over the stove making whatever she had managed to find ingredients for from the limited supplies his fridge and cabinets.

  He turned the shower on and as he waited for the water to heat up, shaved the scruffy hairs on his chin and face. Soon the worn down face looked fresh. The shower greeted him with the pounding of the hot water against his face. The rest of his worries cut lose and followed the water down to the drain at his feet.

  “Hey.” Her voice made him jerk as if he had been home alone and unaware of someone being there.

  “Yeah?” He pulled the curtain back to make eye contact, once more baffled at how bold she was being.

  Where did my shy Shellie go?

  “I, um,” She blushed as she tried hiding her sheepish grin and hid her head behind the door better. “I made omelets, just, just wanted to let you know. Sorry.”

  “Oh, yea?” He grinned, enjoying the awkward moment she had created and was now embarrassed by. “What kind? I didn’t think I had enough food for that.”

  “Ham and cheese, it’s all you had.” She cleared her throat, as she shut the door, no longer being able to continue the conversation with him as her cheeks beamed red.

  Pulling the curtain close again, he continued his blissful shower.

  I really don’t know what’s gotten into her since last night, but at least it seems to be all her choice. To be honest, I am enjoying this confident behavior. It’s almost like we’re an old married couple that’s been together forever. That’s right, and then there was Talib acting weird. He said I could find him at the cathedral. I wonder if he’s been there the whole time. Maybe that’s why I feel so safe there? I mean I have this undoubting sensation to look up at the man for advice. It would make sense considering he’s supposedly my brother. If I were truly reborn again, what would that technically make me?

  He shut the water off grabbing the towel hanging nearby.

  “Took you long enough,” Shellie was sitting on the couch eating what little was left of her omelet as she flipped through one of the albums. “Wow, your mom was popular in high school. I don’t think you ever showed me this.”

  “Yea, I guess she was.” He tightened the towel on his waist and walked into the kitchen to find his plate and fork ready for him next to a glass of orange juice. “Thanks for cooking breakfast. I don’t think I ate yesterday.”

  “No problem.” She paused at a page in the album. “Is this, is this who I think it is?”

  “Is this what?” His mouth was full as he leaned over, “Oh, him.”

  He turned his back to her as he continued eating and she gathered the nerve to ask, “Is that your Dad?”

  “Yea, that would be him.” He took several gulps of his juice. “Uncanny resemblance, huh?”

  “Wow.” She returned her stare to the pictures. “No offense, but, you look a lot like him. There is no denying that he is your dad.”

  “Yea, I know.” Finishing off the last of the omelet, he shoved his dirty dishes into the sink with a loud racket. “It’s almost
taunting to stare in the mirror.”

  “Well, we better get to Chaz’s.” She sighed, walking into the kitchen to begin washing the dishes.

  “Thanks.” He turned her around and kissed her.

  Her body had went tight but she started to kiss him back as he pressed her against the kitchen counter. Pulling his lips away he held her in a tight hug, as if his life depended on it. “But I couldn’t care less about my dad. I’ve got you.”

  All she could do was hug him back and give him the comfort he had wanted for so long. This whole time he had been holding back letting himself appear soft, denying himself the security of being in someone’s arms.

  Chapter Seventeen

  They rode into to the downtown area, admiring the cool early morning air. Kyle wasn’t there yet, but that was normal for him to be running behind. Hotan pulled out his keys and unlocked the door to the club, letting Shellie in first. He took a cautious glance around the alley and shut the door tight, locking it. They quietly walked into the locker room, going about their tasks. Shellie smiled at him every time she passed or made eye contact with him. It was very comforting to feel that everything was as it should be. Grinning, he took in a big breath, glad to have found a calm moment in his life. They set the stage up, testing the equipment as they added one piece at a time.

  It was awkward being there in that smoky club with no one else, not even Chaz to make his remarks. It seemed to have an echo as they made noises and strummed a string here and there. They were making the necessary arrangements to make this audition as painless as possible.

  “Be sure to leave your spare bass up and a spot for them to plug into.” Hotan looked over at her as she strummed a line or two. “It’s hard to say if we’ll get anyone who may not bring their own in. People are weird like that.”

 

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