“I came to talk to you and Mom.”
My dad sat down. “Come on, have a seat.” And he patted the seat beside him at the table. “What’s going on, kid?”
“Is Mom here?” I asked, looking around, noticing the kitchen was a mess.
“She’s just upstairs, changing the bed sheets.”
I laughed and raised an eyebrow at my dad.
“Shut it.”
“What are you two laughing about?” my mom asked when she strolled in.
“Laundry.” I laughed.
My dad jokingly punched my arm before he got up and brought everything to the table to make sandwiches.
“I will never understand you two.” Mom shook her head. “What are you doing here Kirsten? I thought you were in Chicago this week.”
“I came to talk to you and Dad. It’s kinda important.”
“Are you okay?” Mom asked while she grabbed my right hand.
When I started crying, Dad put down the mustard and sat beside me.
Curse these pregnancy hormones. “I quit my job. I, like, quit and walked out in the middle of a meeting.”
“That’s—”
“Mom, please. There’s more.” I raised my left hand on the table and watched my mother’s eyes grow twice their size. “Drew asked me to marry him, and I said yes.”
Mom grabbed my ring and looked at my dad. “Holy shit, did you see this?”
Dad looked at my mom with teasing wide eyes. “Yes, dear, I saw it. In fact, I went along with Drew and helped him pick it out.”
I looked at my dad, stunned.
He just shrugged his shoulders. “What? I just wanted to make sure that my baby girl got the ring she deserved.”
After telling my parents all that had been going on at work and the long story from the past year about Drew and me, I decided I might as well just get it all out in the open.
“There is just one last thing that I need to tell you.” I took in a deep breath. “It’s why I’m here.” With worry on my face, I looked at both of my parents. “I’m pregnant.” Even at thirty-one, sitting at my parents’ table, I felt like I was sixteen, getting caught for sneaking out of the house. I gathered my hands in my lap as I twisted my fingers together.
“You’re what?” my mom asked softly.
“I’m pregnant.”
“How could you? You’re so successful, and Drew…” Mom challenged.
I sat straight in my chair and looked at my dad.
He had a blank look on his face.
“Do not look at your father, Kirsten, when I’m the one who asked you a question.”
I turned towards my mom and squared my shoulders. “I’m pregnant. Drew and I are having a baby. Why are you acting this way? I thought of all people, Mom, you’d be the one jumping for joy. Besides, weren’t you the one who suggested I should go and visit a sperm bank?” I was on a roll. “I’m thirty-one years old, and I do not need your blessing.” I looked back over at my dad. “Wow, never saw that coming from you, Dad. Thanks.” I grabbed my purse off the counter before I started to head toward the door.
“Sit your ass down, Kirsten Backhard. You will not speak to your mother in that tone, especially in our home. She may be your mother, but she is my wife.”
I looked at my mom with tears. “I’m sorry.”
She came rushing to me and gathered me in a hug. “Please have lunch with us. I promise I’m not upset. I’m just stunned.” My mom wiped my hair out of my face. “Baby, I’m so proud of you.” She hugged me again. “The church people can just go suck it if they don’t like that we are having a baby out of wedlock.”
“She’s not having a baby out of wedlock,” my dad announced.
“I-I haven’t decided when I want to get married. I just don’t want a different last name than my children.”
“You heard me, Kirsten. Now, come eat a damn sandwich,” my dad demanded.
Well, fuck me. I should have had a better plan before telling my parents. What the hell was that? Mom’s on my side, and Dad’s freaking out.
“Hey, baby. How was your day?” Drew came up behind me and kissed my cheek while I finished up dinner.
“Good. I went and saw my parents today.”
“Why didn’t you wait for me? I would have come with you.”
“I know, but I wanted to tell them myself. I needed to tell them a lot of things that I haven’t.”
“Is everything okay?” Drew placed his hip on the side of the counter, crossing one ankle over the other, as he waited for my answer.
“Yes, everything is good…but we are getting married soon,” I said softly.
“We’re what?” He laughed.
“Dad said we’re getting married no later than Easter.”
“Why is your dad telling us when we are getting married?”
“Because, he’d be damned if he is going to chase another son-in-law down with a baseball bat.” I shrugged.
“What does that mean?”
“I don’t know, and I sure as fuck didn’t ask.” I giggled. “I’m assuming it’s the main reason why Derek calls Evan douche a lot.”
“Probably. So, what’s for dinner?”
I raised an eyebrow. “Well, my fisherman was supposed to bring home fish.” I put my hands on my hips.
“Uh…”
“That’s what I figured, so I went to the store and brought home the catch of the day.”
Drew stalked toward me and gathered me in his arms.
“Drew, go shower. You stink.”
“Wanna join me?” he asked, wiggling his eyebrows.
“No. I have to finish dinner. Liz and Brad will be here any minute.”
“Fine. But they do have their own key to get in,” Drew said before sulking up the stairs.
“I love you!” I yelled at him.
“That was delicious, Kirsten. Thank you,” Brad said while patting his belly.
I smiled. “Who wants dessert?”
“What did you make?” asked Liz.
“I didn’t. Mom did. She made key lime pie.”
“In that case, I’ll have mine and Brad’s pieces.”
“Hey,” whined her husband.
Liz looked at Brad. “It’s for the baby.”
“Everything is for the baby,” Brad muttered under his breath.
“Dude, don’t pout.” Drew snickered.
“Easy for you to say. You didn’t have to stop halfway through sex to get Dairy Queen.”
Drew and I busted out laughing.
“Oh my god! I can’t believe you told them!” Liz seethed.
“Liz, relax. It’s funny.” I snorted.
“Besides…” Drew rubbed my belly. “It’ll be my turn soon.”
Brad looked at us in shock. “Kirsten, you’re pregnant?”
We all busted out laughing again.
“Dude, you’re the one who told me!” Drew snorted.
Brad put up his hands. “I swear, man, I never touched her. Okay, maybe in college I would have, or maybe I wanted to ask her to join in…but, dude, I swear that I never touched her, even when I wanted to.”
“Stop rambling and calm down, man. I believe you.”
Liz slapped him across the chest. “Brad, you’re such an ass.”
“How is she pregnant?” Brad asked.
“Well, you see,” I started, “when a man and a women fall in love—”
“I got that part. What I don’t understand is how I told Drew. I didn’t know you were pregnant.”
“Monday night after wings and beer, you came home, plastered—” Liz started.
“And funny as hell,” I interrupted.
“Kirsten was laughing so hard at you. Liz made fun of her doing the ugly pregnant cry, and Kirsten said she couldn’t help it. That was when you announced that she was pregnant, and then you called me a goofus,” stated Drew. He was still unhappy about being called at goofus.
“Congratulations, man. I guess that means we are tearing the fence apart this summer?”
“I guess so,” Drew said.
Brad turned to Liz. “See, baby? I told you that I would make all your dreams come true.”
“Oh, yes, honey. You made all my dreams come true.” He kissed his wife and rubbed her belly.
“Get over here, buddy,” Brad said to Drew.
The boys did their man slap thingy.
“Congratulations, Drew. Best experience ever…until she craves Dairy Queen.”
Brad was throwing clothes in his suitcase. He was all pissed off. “I don’t want to go out of town. There are other guys at the office who could go. It’s bullshit. You are about to have my baby.”
I waddled over to the rocking chair and leaned my way down. “Things will be fine. I have another few weeks to go, and the doctor, who you made me go see today, confirmed that there are no signs of giving birth during the twenty-four hours when you’ll gone.”
He kneeled in front of me and started kissing my belly. “I hate that I have to leave you.”
I kissed the top of his head. “I know, baby, and I know that you’ll always be thinking of us.”
“Always.”
Brad kissed my cheek. “Good-bye, sweetheart. Stay in bed.”
“I want to see you off,” I said while rolling over onto my back.
“The car is already waiting outside for me.”
“Why didn’t you wake me up sooner?”
He moved the hair out of my face. “And miss out on watching you sleep? No way.” He kissed the top of my head. “I’ll see you tomorrow for dinner.”
“I love you, Brad Edison.”
“I love you more.”
When I went downstairs for breakfast, I saw a beautiful bouquet of flowers sitting on the kitchen table. “How did he—”
“He didn’t.”
I jumped three feet out of my skin. “What the fuck? Kirsten! You scared the life out of me.” I put my hand on my chest, feeling my pounding heart.
“That’s the point.” Kirsten was sitting on the kitchen counter, swinging her legs, as she sipped on coffee.
“What are you doing here?”
“I promised peanut’s overprotective daddy that I would stay with you all day.”
“I don’t need a babysitter,” I groaned.
“I know, but what else am I going to do? I’m unemployed, remember?”
“Have you heard from Negotiating Way at all?”
Kirsten walked over to the plate of pancakes. “Chris called last week and offered me a quiet leave and one hell of a severance package if I decide not to sue.”
“What are you going to do?”
“Let them sweat it out. I want more.” She shrugged.
“You always want more.” I laughed.
“What can I say Liz? I’m a greedy bitch. It’s like how the song goes, “It would’ve been cheaper to keep her around,” I sang. “The thing is that I know they can offer me more money, but that’s not what I want.”
“What do you want, Kirsten? They are a pretty big company to go head-to-head against,” I said.
“Sure, but they know I’d win in court. Not only did they let Marc go, but the board also personally phoned each one of my old clients and apologized.”
“You’re still not telling me what you want.”
“I want them to drop the two-year contract that I have with them. It says I can’t start my own company or go to any other company within a six-hundred mile radius.”
“Are you thinking of starting your own company?”
“I don’t know what I want.”
I shoved her. “You never know what you want.”
“I do, too. I want to get pedis.”
Standing under the shower, I felt a slight pinch in my back, but I thought nothing of it. My body seemed to have a mind of its own since being pregnant. I got dressed and headed downstairs for the impatiently waiting Kirsten.
“Took you long enough,” she huffed.
“Shut up. I have my own fucking zip code now.”
“Fuck off. You do not. When I look at you from behind, I can’t even tell you’re pregnant.”
“Really?”
“Really.” She smiled.
“Do I still look like I’m twenty-five?” I asked.
“Let’s not go that far.”
Getting into Drew’s SUV was a little harder than I’d thought it would be. Finally, I just had to jump a little into the seat. “Phew. Pretty soon, I won’t be able to lift my own body weight.” I laughed. When I twisted to get my seat belt on, I felt another pinch in my back. “Ow.”
“Are you okay?” asked Kirsten.
“Yeah, I just twisted funny when I was getting the seat belt. I’m fine. Let’s go get some pretty toes!” I rubbed my belly. “Why are we riding in the SUV? Where’s your car?”
Kirsten laughed. “Apparently, Drew took a page from Brad and said that I could no longer use the car.”
“Meaning the SUV is safer?” I laughed.
“Boys.”
We both chuckled on the way to the spa.
I felt so relaxed while I got a pedi with the chair massaging my back.
“You like this color?” asked the nail tech.
“Yes, please.”
“Look good on you,” she said as she painted my nails.
“Thanks.”
The pinching in my back continued, so I kept shifting in my seat as I waited for my toes to dry.
“You need eyebrow done?”
“No, thanks.”
“Lip. You got a little hair.”
“No, thanks.”
“Okay, you sit and wait until paint dry, okay?”
I smiled back at her while rubbing my baby bump. I laid back and closed my eyes, still shifting.
“What’s wrong with you? Have you been fidgeting since I went to get waxed?”
“This seat is just uncomfortable.” I put all my effort into getting up.
“Well, let’s go then.” Kirsten helped me down before she paid the bill.
“I need to stop by the grocery store before we go home. Is that okay?” I asked.
“Sure. I think Drew is low on shampoo anyway. I’ll pick some up while I’m there.”
“Wanna walk or drive?” I asked.
“Your call. I’m not the huge pregnant lady.”
“We can walk. It’s only across the parking lot.” Maybe I can walk off these back cramps.
“Cart or basket?” Kirsten asked when we finally arrived at the store.
“Basket. I only need a few things.”
“Basket it is.” Kirsten said while picking it up and passing it to me.
“I’m gonna pick up some grapes, orange juice, toilet paper, and a bottle of Coke for when Brad comes home.”
After walking through the produce aisle and heading into the pop aisle, I felt a weird twinge on my side. I gave Kirsten a funny look.
“What is it, Liz?”
“I think we better…ouch!” I instantly bent over. “Fucking Christ, that hurts.”
Panicked, Kirsten asked quickly, “What hurts?”
“My back and my side. Oh fuck, there it is again.”
Kirsten was busy digging into her huge purse. “Where the fuck is it?”
“What? Your Birth control? A little too late for that.” I commented flatly.
“No, fucktard. I’m calling Drew to see what I should do.”
I dropped my basket on the floor and screamed.
“No, Drew. I’m fine. It’s Liz. We’re at the grocery store on Thomas Street. I think she is in labor. Fuck, I don’t know. I know I’m the woman. Drew, shut the fuck up! What should I do?” Kirsten hung up the phone. “He’s on his way. He’ll be here in five minutes.”
I looked up at my best friend. “I’m scared.”
“Fuck. Me, too.”
“Kirsten!” yelled Drew from the store entrance.
“Thank Christ,” Kirsten said as she rubbed my back while I held on to the shelf unit for dear life. “Drew, we’re in the pop ai
sle.”
“Get away from them. Clear the way!” he yelled. “Thank God. Are you two okay?”
I looked at Drew with shooter laser beams. “Do I look fucking okay to you?”
Drew winced. “Let’s get you to the hospital.”
When Drew brought me into his arms, I cried. “It’s too early. Brad’s not here.” I panted. “He didn’t want to leave me.” I lifted my head up, trying to get some oxygen.
“I think we need to call an ambulance,” Kirsten said while dialling her cell.
“One is on the way,” replied the store manager.
“Thank you,” said Drew.
“I need to sit or lie down on the floor.” All of a sudden, I had hands all over me, trying to get me to lie down.
“Stop touching her! Haven’t you ever seen a lady in labor before? Go finish your shopping!” Kirsten yelled.
“Kirsten, they are only trying to help,” Drew tried to console her.
Kirsten looked at me. “I’m sorry. I’m freaking the fuck out!”
“Mrs. Edison, it looks like we won’t be able to stop your labor. Your son will be born sometime today.” Dr. McKael smiled. “I’m assuming you have someone waiting for you in the lounge area. We can ask the nurse to get him or her.”
“Yes, her name is Kirsten Backhard and also her fiancé, Drew.” I let out a long breath and looked at the ceiling. “Brad is not here yet. I don’t even know if he knows what’s going on. Oh my god, Dr. McKael, I’ve got to phone my husband.”
Dr. McKael placed her hand on mine. “Liz, I called Brad as soon I knew it was you coming in by ambulance. He’s on his way.”
“How is he?”
“Panicked, like any other father. I understand that you saw my associate yesterday.”
“Yes, Brad wanted to make sure nothing like this would happen while he was away overnight on business.”
“Well, it looks like your son had other plans.” Dr. McKael started spreading my legs. “Now that you have an epidural, you and baby seem to be relaxing. Why don’t we take a look and see how dilated you are?”
“Jesus Christ! What’s going on with Liz’s vagina?” yelped Kirsten as she walked in.
Drew instantly closed his eyes, turned around, and mumbled, “Sorry, sorry, sorry.”
The Game-Kirsten Backhard Page 25