“That’s not funny, Rayanne. I’ve never felt anything like it.”
Of that she had no doubt. Right now she wanted to kick a certain ghost. She knew he was feeling protective, but she didn’t need him fighting her battles for her.
“It’s almost sunrise. Why don’t I fix us both breakfast while you get packed up and ready to go?”
Shawn finally conceded defeat. “Fine, but I’m guessing your mother’s going to want a report. What should I tell her?”
So be it. “Tell her the same thing I do. I’m happy and doing fine up here.”
“I’m not sure she’ll believe me.”
Rayanne had to laugh. “Don’t take it personally. She doesn’t believe me, either. Now, how do you like your eggs?”
“Scrambled.”
“Perfect.”
When he started up the stairs, Rayanne waited until she heard the door to her room close before speaking. She’d let Shawn have her room while she’d slept on the couch downstairs. Eventually, she’d have to deal with Ray’s room, but she still wasn’t ready to cross that threshold.
“Wyatt, are you still here?”
He shimmered into visibility briefly, barely long enough for her to locate him in the room. “Thank you for defending me, but you’d better disappear until he’s gone. I can’t afford for him to carry tales back to my family.”
A cool touch brushed across her skin, sending a delicious shiver coursing through her veins.
“See you later,” she whispered, crossing her fingers that was true.
For now, she put the coffee on to brew and started Shawn’s farewell meal.
Chapter 12
Rayanne was noticeably absent as her unwelcome guest tossed his valise in the back of his car and slammed the lid shut. A few seconds later the car roared to life. Shawn rolled down his window and stared at the cabin, his expression flat. Not that Wyatt cared what the man was thinking. He clearly wasn’t the right man for Rayanne. The car pulled away from the cabin in a cloud of dust.
Good riddance.
Earlier, Wyatt had reached the edge of the woods on his way to Blessing when he’d abruptly turned back. A mix of curiosity and jealousy had made him slip inside the cabin, determined to see what was going on between Rayanne and her would-be beau.
Watching the bastard kiss her had been like being dragged behind a horse across rocky ground. The only comfort was in knowing that Rayanne didn’t welcome his advances. Even so, there had been a hint of guilt in her eyes after Shawn retreated upstairs to pack. What was that about?
Hell, if he had her best interests at heart, he would’ve encouraged her to give the guy a chance. After all, Shawn could offer her everything Wyatt couldn’t, including a future.
Now wasn’t the time to press her for answers. He’d brushed against her on his way out, but it hadn’t been enough. He wished he could wrap her in his arms and hold her, to offer at least the comfort of his touch. On the other hand, he doubted being enfolded in a wave of cold would improve her mood. If only he could find a way to be with her. He could still sense her sadness.
Should he check on her?
Yes.
He drifted back toward the cabin. In his present form, he couldn’t knock. He passed through the door, stopping inside the kitchen to listen. Rayanne wasn’t there or in the living room. That left the upstairs, the one part of the cabin he’d never been before.
He paused, hovering at the foot of the steps. If he waited for an invitation, hell could freeze over before he got to see where Rayanne slept. Maybe it was wrong of him to want to intrude on her privacy, but it wasn’t only lust that had him wanting to see her in bed. He was worried about her.
He drifted upward, still considering his options. If she appeared to be fine, he’d leave, and she’d be none the wiser. But if she wasn’t, well, he’d do whatever he could to comfort her.
At the landing, he stopped to listen. The bathroom door was open, so he knew she wasn’t in there. The door to the room that had belonged to Ray was closed with nothing but silence on the other side. That left Rayanne’s bedroom.
A true gentleman wouldn’t cross the threshold into a lady’s room uninvited. Good thing he’d never been accused of being one. Her door was open. She stood by the bed, still wearing those skimpy shorts and shirt. In a burst of action, she peeled the sheets off the bed and heaved them toward the far corner. Okay, so Shawn had indeed spent the night in Rayanne’s bed, but from her behavior earlier, he’d slept there alone.
The odd thing was that even though Wyatt had never been in this room before, it somehow felt incredibly familiar. He knew without looking that there was a painting of a mountain scene on the far wall and that a matching one hung behind the open door where he couldn’t see it.
There’d been long hours during the night where he’d stared up at the window from the meadow below and wondered what it would be like to hold Rayanne in his arms. At times, those moments had been so real to him that he could have sworn her hands had touched his bare skin as he’d made love to her. Probably just wishful thinking on his part. With her usual quick efficiency, she made up the bed with fresh linens. When she finished fluffing the pillows, she tossed them on the mattress.
“Wyatt, I know you’re there. The question is why?”
He pulled himself together. The incident with Shawn had burned up a lot of his energy, but he managed to solidify enough that he could be seen.
“I needed to know you were all right.”
Rayanne frowned and sat down on the edge of the bed. “Sorry. I didn’t quite catch that. I’m guessing that whole mess downstairs took a lot out of both of us.”
He nodded.
“Shawn is a nice guy. We’ve dated a few times. I enjoyed his company, but...”
She stopped for several seconds, staring down at the floor. “I knew he wanted more than I was willing to give. I didn’t want to hurt his feelings, but I should have broken it off as soon as I realized all I wanted was a dinner companion while he wanted a wife.”
For the first time, Wyatt felt a glimmer of sympathy for the other man. After all, he wanted the same things from Rayanne and was just as unable to satisfy her needs. He wanted to punch something and curse the gods who had condemned him to this nonlife.
He waited until she looked up again and slowly mouthed. “Are you all right?”
This time she understood him. “I will be. Right now I’m tired, so I’m going to go back to bed for a while. Maybe I’ll feel like working later, but I’m thinking I’ll probably take the day off.”
Her smile was anything but happy. “I’ll need all my strength to deal with my mother once she hears from Shawn. She won’t be happy that I let him leave without me.”
Her voice caught on a sob. “I came up here to lay the past to rest. Why can’t they understand that?”
Damn, he wished those people would leave her alone. It didn’t help that instead of laying the past to rest, she’d gotten tangled up with him. He edged closer, unsure what he could do to make her feel better. Touching her might use up the last bit of strength he had, but it was worth the risk.
She tracked his movement as he came toward her but made no attempt to dissuade him. When he stood right in front of her, he slowly raised his hand, bringing it ever closer to the soft curve of her cheek. The warmth of her life force drew him like nothing he’d ever known before. When his fingertips came to rest on her cheek, her skin felt like living, breathing satin.
She sighed and leaned into the curve of his palm, obviously taking as much pleasure from the small contact as he did. Once again, thanks to Rayanne, he felt solid; he felt real; he felt like a man.
One who hungered.
But the last thing she needed right now was another man pushing her for something she couldn’t give. He backed away.
He forced one word, hoping she’d hear him. “Rest.”
Then he started to fade away, to leave her alone to recuperate from the strain of the past twenty-four hours.
Her green eyes looked at him with such sadness, the sheen of tears making them shine brighter and even more beautiful. “I wish you and I could... I mean, I feel so comfortable with you, not like when I’m around other people and have to pretend to be like them. If you weren’t... But you are, and I’m not.”
She swiped a hand across her cheek to catch the tears. “I’m sorry. I’m not making any sense. Go ahead and go. I’ll be more myself later.”
He owed her a bit of his truth, too. “I wish we could, too.”
Then he dissolved into nothing at all.
* * *
Rayanne had slept like the dead. Well, all things considered, maybe that wasn’t the best analogy. But at least no dreams had plagued her this time. She sat up on the edge of the mattress, her thoughts sticky with too much sleep and not enough caffeine. The light from outside was dim, meaning she’d lost most of the day.
A shower would help clear out the cobwebs. She needed to be sharp because she had no doubt that there’d be a message waiting for her downstairs from her mother. Coward that she was, she’d turned off the phone to avoid another crisis until she’d gotten some rest.
Twenty minutes later she stepped out on the porch to watch the sunset, her mood vastly improved. No message from her mother or her father. She wasn’t foolish enough to think they’d finally decided to back off and let her make her own decisions, but she’d take what she could get.
Out of habit, she scanned the area, looking for Wyatt, but he was nowhere in sight. She’d learned enough about his condition, for lack of a better word, to know that the events of the early morning would have taken their toll on him, as well. For the moment, she’d fix herself some dinner and eat it out on the porch. If he didn’t appear before then, she’d take a stroll into Blessing to check on him.
As she put together a salad, she glanced at the calendar and realized she’d lost track of the days. Tomorrow was Uncle Ray’s birthday, the day she’d planned to scatter his ashes on the mountain that he loved. It seemed an appropriate way to celebrate his life.
The only question was where she should take him. Maybe Wyatt would have a suggestion. He knew better than she did where Uncle Ray liked to prowl when he’d walked in the woods. Some quiet spot, one off the trail where he’d find peace at last.
But that was tomorrow. Tonight, all she wanted to do was relax. Picking up her food, she headed back outside. To her surprise, Wyatt was waiting for her. Her mood brightened immediately.
“I’m glad you’re here. I was going to go into town to check on you if you didn’t come back.”
He’d tipped his hat back and propped his boots up on the railing, looking content. “I’m fine.”
His gaze was pinned on the fading light to the west. That didn’t mean his real attention wasn’t on her, just as hers was on him. “Thank you again for this morning, Wyatt.”
He nodded, but the following silence was comfortable, two friends enjoying the evening air. When she was done with her dinner, she set the plate aside.
“Uncle Ray asked one last favor of me. He wanted me to scatter his ashes on the mountain. I was wondering if you had any suggestions where he might have had...you know, a favorite spot where he can be laid to rest.”
Wyatt sat so quietly, she wondered if she’d somehow offended him. There was a sadness in his expression that she hadn’t seen before. Sometimes she forgot that he’d actually died back when Blessing was a bustling town, but he’d remained trapped here on the mountain. Would he ever know peace?
“I’m sorry, Wyatt. I wasn’t thinking. I forget sometimes.”
He stopped her. “It’s all right, Rayanne. It means a lot that you forget what I am, that you treat me like a real man and a friend.”
“You are my friend, Wyatt. Never doubt that.”
There was a lot of heat in his eyes when he smiled at her, the kind of heat a man felt for a woman he found attractive. She suspected that he could see the same need reflected in hers. Something dark and hungry stirred in the night air between them.
She wanted this man. And what an irony that was. She’d gotten rid of Shawn because he left her cold.
And Wyatt, who carried the chill of death with him everywhere, made her blood run hot. The gods obviously had a perverse sense of humor. The single kiss the two of them had shared had almost destroyed him. Losing him would destroy her.
Damn.
She couldn’t sit still, but night had fallen. Too late to walk off her frustration. Rather than stay in one spot, she stood up and walked to the far end of the porch, well aware that Wyatt watched her every movement. When she finally lit in one spot, he joined her at the railing.
“I know a spot Ray loved. I’ll take you there in the morning. Pack a lunch. It’s a bit of a walk.”
“I will. Thank you.” She stared at him, drinking in the strength in his handsome face.
“You have something on your mind, Rayanne?”
His voice was a deep rumble that she felt all the way to her bones. She tried to put what she was feeling into words. “I was just wondering about the why of it all. Why you’re still here. Why I can see you when even Amanda, Hattie and Uncle Ray only got the occasional glimpse of you and the others. Why I want—”
Oops, almost went too far with that. It’s bad enough that she’d developed such an attachment to her ghostly companion without embarrassing both herself and him by admitting that she had feelings for him. Desires the likes of which she’d never known before for any man.
He stared off into the distance. “We’ll need to get an early start tomorrow.”
She managed a small smile. “Okay. I’ll be ready at first light. Thank you for doing this for me, Wyatt.”
“Anything within my power.”
Once again he raised his hand to her face, but this time the cold made her flinch. He knew it, too, because he jerked his hand back down to the railing.
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. I like it when you touch me. A lot.” Feeling a little embarrassed, she admitted, “I dream of you...of us every night. It’s like you’re right there with me.”
His eyes widened in surprise. “I think maybe I have been.” He glanced up toward her bedroom window. “I’d never been in your room before, but I knew exactly how it looked.”
“Maybe somehow we find each other in the one place we can be together, but it’s not enough, Wyatt. I want to hold you in my arms for real.”
As she spoke, she eased closer to him, but he shook his head and stepped away. “As much as I’d like to, Rayanne, we shouldn’t. You deserve a man of your own time, a good one. Not someone like me. And I’m not just talking about the fact that I’m dead. If you really knew me, knew what I was capable of, you wouldn’t want me.”
Tears stung her eyes, but she blinked them away. “I don’t believe that. I’ve seen the kind of man you are. I like the kind of man you are.”
“You don’t know—” he started to say, but then he hesitated. “Look, none of that matters. Nothing will change that I’m not alive. I’m just a fragment of a man caught between here and hell.”
She hated the pain in those words, the despair. How had he remained sane after all this time?
But if he wouldn’t defend himself, she would.
“Stop that right now. You are not just a fragment, Wyatt McCain.” She faced him head-on to make sure he knew she meant business. “I don’t know why you’re stuck here like this, but I’m damn glad you are. You saved my life that day in the mining office. That makes you a hero in my book, and I won’t let you tell me any different.”
She didn’t know what kind of reaction to expect, but laugh
ter wasn’t it. On the other hand, the bright smile across Wyatt’s lips took years off his face, reminding her that he hadn’t been much older than she was now when he died.
“What’s so funny? I meant what I said.”
She knew she sounded more than a bit defensive, but at least his laughter had brightened both his mood and his image. Before, the gleam of the porch light had passed right through him. Now he actually cast a faint shadow.
“I’m sorry. A gentleman should never contradict a lady.”
His eyes crinkled in good humor as he held up his hands in surrender.
“See, that proves you’re smart, too.”
This time their shared laughter rang out across the meadow. As the last echo died away, she found herself lost in the wonder of Wyatt’s gaze. She could feel the power of it calling to her, pulling her closer, right into the strength of his arms.
She whispered his name as he closed the last bit of distance between them, for once his lips warm and soft against hers. His arms held her so very carefully, as if she were something precious and fragile. She leaned into his strength, learning for the first time what it would’ve been like to hold this man in her arms when he’d been alive, back when he walked the streets of Blessing.
His tongue swept into her mouth, tasting, touching, exploring, driving her crazy. She shivered, this time with anticipation, not cold. The heady scent of leather and man filled her head. How could this be real?
But it was.
At that moment, Wyatt was right there, solid as a rock, kissing her, holding her, demanding as much from her as she could give. She moaned, wanting so much more.
She broke off the kiss long enough to ask, “Will you come upstairs with me?”
But as soon as she did, he faded, no longer solid, no longer there.
“Wyatt!” she cried as he stepped away from her, staring at his hands as they flickered in and out of sight.
Even so, he smiled. “That was amazing!”
Although his voice was little better than a whisper, his joy remained real. “Did you mean that? About me coming upstairs with you?”
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