by Ellen Wood
Whether Colonel and Mrs. Cleeve would have chosen to speak much before their daughter of the lover she had been obliged to resign, cannot be said. Most probably not. But circumstances over which they had no control led to its being done. When, towards the close of June, the news of that strange tragedy enacted by Adam Andinnian broke upon the world, all the world was full of it. Not a visitor, calling to see them, but went over the marvellous wonders of the tale in Lucy’s hearing, and, as it seemed to her, for her own special benefit. The entirely unprovoked (as was at first said and supposed) nature of the crime; the singular fact that it should have been committed the very day of his assuming his rank amidst the baronetage of the kingdom; the departure of Mrs. Andinnian on the journey that he ought to have taken, and the miserable thought, so full of poignancy to the Andinnian family, that if he had gone, the calamity could not have happened; the summons to the young lieutenant at Winchester, his difficulty with the telegram, and his arrival at night to find what had happened at the desolate house! All these facts, and very many more details, some true, some untrue, were brought before Lucy day after day. To escape them was impossible, unless she had shut herself up from society, for men and women’s mouths were full of them; and none had the least suspicion that the name of Andinnian was more than any other name to Lucy Cleeve. It was subsequent to this, you of course understand, that she became ill. During this period, she was only somewhat ailing, and was going about just as other people went.
The subject — it has been already said — did not die out quickly. Before it was allowed to do so, there came the trial; and that and its proceedings kept it alive for many a day more. But that the matter altogether bore an unusual interest, and that a great deal of what is called romance, by which public imagination is fed, encompassed it, was undeniable. The step in rank attained by Lieutenant Andinnian, his captaincy, was discussed and re-discussed as though no man had ever taken it before. So that, long ere the period now arrived at, August, Colonel and Mrs. Cleeve talked of the Andinnian affairs before their daughter with as little thought of reticence as they would have given to the most common questions of everyday life, and perhaps had nearly forgotten that there had ever been a cause why they should observe it.
A word of Miss Blake. That the perfidy — she looked upon it as such — of Lieutenant Andinnian in regard to herself, was a very bitter blow and tried her heart nearly as the separation was trying Lucy’s, may at once be admitted. Nothing, in the world or out of it, would have persuaded her that the young man did not at an early period love her, that he would have ultimately married her but for the stepping in between them of Lucy Cleeve: and there lay a very angry and bitter feeling against Lucy at the bottom of her heart. Not against Mr. Andinnian. The first shock over, she quite exonerated him, and threw all the weight of blame on Lucy. Is it not ever so — that woman, in a case of rivalry such as this, detests and misjudges the woman, and exempts the man?
But Miss Blake had a very strict conscience. In one of more gentle and tender nature, this would have been an admirable thing; in her, whose nature was exceptionally hard, it might cause her to grow into something undesirably stem. There was a chance for her yet. Underlying her every thought, word, action, her witty sallies in the ball-room, her prayers in church, remained ever the one faint hope — that Karl Andinnian would recover his senses and return to his first allegiance. If this ever came to pass, and she became Mrs. Andinnian, the little kindness existing in Theresa Blake’s nature would assert itself. For, though she was very just, or strove to be, she was not kind.
With this strict conscience, Miss Blake could not encourage her ill-feeling towards Lucy. On the contrary, she put it resolutely from her, and strove to go on her way in a duteous course of life and take up her own sorrow as a kind of appointed cross. All very well, this, so far as it went: but there was one dreadful want ever making itself heard — the want to fill the aching void in her lonely heart. After a disappointment to the affections, all women feel this need; and none unless they have felt it, can know or imagine the intense need of it. When the heart has been filled to the uttermost with a beloved object, every hour of the day gladdened with his sight, every dream of the night rejoicing with the thought of the morning’s renewed meeting, and he is compulsorily snatched away for ever, the awful blank left is almost worse than death. Every aim and end and hope in life seems to have died suddenly out, leaving only a vacuum: a vacuum that tells of nothing but pain. But for finding some object which the mind can take up and concentrate itself upon, there are women who could go mad. Miss Blake found hers in religion.
Close upon that night when you saw Mr. Andinnian and Lucy Cleeve pacing together the garden of the Reverend Mr. Blake’s rectory, Mr. Blake was seized with a fit. The attack was not in itself very formidable, but it bore threatening symptoms for the future. Perfect rest was enjoined by his medical attendants, together with absence from the scene of his labours. As soon, therefore, as he could be moved, Mr. Blake departed; leaving his church in the charge of his many-years curate, and of a younger man who was hastily engaged to assist him. This last was a stranger in the place, the Reverend Guy Cattacomb. Now, singular to say, but it was the fact, immediately after Mr. Blake’s departure, the old curate was incapacitated by an attack of very serious illness, and he also had to go away for rest and change. This left the church wholly in the hands of the new man, Mr, Cattacomb. And this most zealous but rather mistaken divine, at once set about introducing various changes in the service; asking nobody’s permission, or saying with your leave, or by your leave.
The service had hitherto been conducted reverently, plainly, and with thorough efficiency. The singing was good; the singers — men and boys — wore white surplices: in short, all things were done decently and in order: and both Mr. Blake and his curate were excellent preachers. To the exceeding astonishment of the congregation, Mr. Cattacomb swooped down upon them the very first Sunday he was left to himself, with what they were pleased to term “vagaries.” Vagaries they undoubtedly were, and not only needless ones, but such as were calculated to bring a wholesome, and sound Protestant church into disrepute. The congregation remonstrated, but the Reverend Guy persisted. The power for the time being, lay in his hands, and he used it after his own heart.
“Man, proud man, dressed in a little brief authority,
Plays such fantastic tricks before high heaven as make the angels weep.”
How applicable are those lines of Shakespeare’s to some of the over-zealous young divines of the present day!
The progress of events in Mr. Blake’s church need not be traced. It is enough to say that the Reverend Mr. Cattacomb — whose preaching was no better than the rest of him: a quarter of an hour’s rant, of which nobody could make any sense at all — emptied the church. Nearly all the old congregation left it In their places a sprinkling of young people began to frequent it We have had examples of these things.
The Reverend Guy led, and his flock (almost the whole of them ardent young girls of no experience) followed. There were banners and processions, and images of saints and angels, and candlesticks and scrolls and artificial flowers, and thrown-up incense, and soft mutterings coming from nowhere, and all kinds of odd services at all kinds of hours, and risings-up and sittings-down, and bowings here and bowings there, and private confessions and public absolutions. Whether the worship, or, in fact, the church itself was meant to represent the Roman Catholic faith or the Protestant no living soul could tell. It was ultra-foolish — that is really the only name for it — and created some scandal. People took to speak of its frequenters slightingly and disrespectfully as “Mr. Cattacomb and his tail.” The tail being the ardent young ladies who were never away from his heels.
Never a one amidst them more ardent than Miss Blake. In the Rev. Guy and his ceremonies she found that outlet for the superfluous resources of her heart that Karl Andinnian had left so vacant. Ten times a day, if the church had ten services, or scraps of services, was Miss Blake to be seen a
mid the knot of worshippers. At early morning she went to Matins; at sunset she went to Vespers. Once a week she was penned up in a close box which the Reverend Guy had put up as a confessional, confessing her sins. Some ladies chose the Reverend Mr. Cattacomb as their father priest in this respect; some chose his friend and coadjutor the Reverend Damon Puff: a very zealous young man also, whom the former had appointed to his assistance. One confessional box was soon found quite insufficient, and a second was introduced. Lookers-on began to wonder what would come next. Miss Blake did not neglect the claims of society in her new call to devotion; so that, what with the world and what with the church, she had but little spare time on her hands. It was somewhat unusual to see her, as now, seated quietly at her needle. The work was some beauteous silken embroidery, destined to cover a cushion for Mr. Cattacomb’s reverend knees to rest upon when at his private devotions. The needle came to a sudden pause.
“I wonder if I am wrong,” she exclaimed, after regarding attentively the leaf that had been growing under her hands. “Mrs. Cleeve, do you think the leaves to this rose should be brown? I fancy they ought to be green.”
“Do not ask me anything about it, Theresa.”
Mrs. Cleeve’s answer wore rather a resentful accent. The fact was, both herself and Colonel Cleeve were sadly vexed at Miss Blake’s wholesale goings in for the comprehensive proceedings of Mr. Cattacomb. They had resigned their pew in the church themselves, and now walked regularly to the beautiful services in the cathedral. Colonel Cleeve remonstrated with Miss Blake for what he called her folly. He told her that she was making herself ridiculous; and that these ultra innovations could but tend to bring religion itself into disrepute. It will therefore be understood that Mrs. Cleeve, knowing what the embroidery was destined for, did not regard it with approbation.
“Theresa, if I thought my dear child, here, Lucy, would ever make the spectacle of herself that you and those other girls are doing, I should weep with sorrow and shame.” —
“Well I’m sure!” cried Miss Blake. “Spectacle!”
“What else is it! To see a parcel of brainless girls running after Guy Cattacomb and that other one — Puff! Their mothers ought to know better than to allow it. God’s pure and reverent and holy worship is one thing; this is quite another.”
Lucy asked for some of the cooling beverage that stood near: her mouth felt always parched. As her mother brought it to her, Lucy pressed her hand and looked up in her face with a smile. Mrs. Cleeve knew that it was as much as to say “There is no fear of me.”
Colonel Cleeve came in as the glass was being put down. He looked somewhat anxiously at his daughter: he was beginning to be uneasy that she did not gain strength more quickly.
“How do you feel now, my dear?”
“Only a little cold, papa.”
“Dear me — and it is a very hot day!” remarked the colonel, wiping his brows, for he had been walking fast. —
“Is there any news stirring in the town?” asked Mrs. Cleeve.
“Nothing particular. Captain Andinnian has sold out. He could not do anything else under the circumstances.” —
“It is a dreadful blight upon the young man’s career!” said Mrs. Cleeve.
“There was no help for it, Lucinda. Had he been a general he must have done the same. A man who has a brother working in chains, cannot remain an officer in the Queen’s service. Had the brother been hanged, I think the Commander-in-chief would have been justified in cashiering Captain Andinnian, if he had not taken the initiative,” added the colonel, who was very jealous of his order.
Miss Blake turned with a flush of emotion. This news fell on her heart like lead. Her first thought when the colonel spoke had been — If he has left the army, there will be nothing to bring him again to Winchester.
“Captain Andinnian cannot be held responsible for what his brother did,” she said.
“Of course not,” admitted the colonel.
“Neither ought it to be visited upon him.”
“The worst of these sad things, you see, Theresa, is, that they are visited upon the ralatives: and there’s no preventing it. Captain Andinnian must go through life henceforth as a marked man; in a degree as a banned one: liable to be pointed at by every stranger as a man who has a brother a convict.”
There was a pause. The last word grated on their ears. Miss Blake inwardly winced at it: should she become the wife of Karl Andinnian —
“Will Sir Adam be sent to Australia?” asked Mrs. Cleeve of her husband, interrupting Theresa’s thoughts.
“No. To Portland Island. It is said he is already there.”
“I wonder what will become of his money? His estate, and that?”
“Report runs that he made it all over to his mother before the trial. I don’t know how far that may be true. Well, it is a thousand pities for Captain Andinnian,” summed up the colonel: “he was a very nice young fellow.”
They might have thought Lucy, sitting there, her face covered by her hand, was asleep, so still was she. Presently, Colonel and Mrs. Cleeve were called away to receive some visitors; and Miss Blake began folding her silks and white satin in tissue paper, for the hour of some service or other was at hand. Halting for a moment at the fire to shake the ends of silk from her gown into the hearth, she glanced at Lucy.
“Suppose you had been married to Karl Andinnian, Lucy!”
“Well?”
“What an awful fate it would have been for you!”
“I should only have clung to him the closer, Theresa,” was the low answer. And it must be premised that neither Lucy nor any one else had the slightest notion of Miss Blake’s regard for Karl.
Miss Blake glanced at her watch. She had two minutes yet. She turned and stood before Lucy. In her unselfish judgment — and she did try to judge unselfishly always — a union with Captain Andinnian now, though she herself might stoop to put up with it in her great love, would be utterly beneath Lucy Cleeve.
“You — you do not mean to imply that you would marry Captain Andinnian, as things are?”
“I would. My father and mother permitting.”
“You unhappy girl! Where’s your pride?”
“I did not say I was going to do it, Theresa. You put an imaginary proposition; one that is altogether impossible, and I replied to that. I do not expect ever to see Karl Andinnian again in this world.”
Something in the despairing accent touched Miss Blake, in spite of her wild jealousy. “You seem very poorly to-day, Lucy,” she gently said. “Are you in pain?”
“No,” replied Lucy, with a sigh: “not in pain. But I don’t seem to get much better, do I, Theresa? I wish I could, for papa and mamma’s sake.”
CHAPTER VI.
An Atmosphere of Mystery.
IT seemed to Mrs. Andinnian and to her son, Karl, that trouble like unto theirs had never yet fallen upon man. Loving Adam as they did, for his sake it was more than they knew how to bear. The disgrace and blight to themselves were terrible; to Karl especially, who was, so to say, only entering on life. There are some calamities that can never be righted in this world; scarcely softened. This was one. Calamities when we can only bear, bear always here; when nothing is left us but to look forward to, and live on for, the next world, where no pain will be. In Karl’s mind this was ever present.
The bare fact of the selling-out was to Karl Andinnian a bitter blow. He was attached to his profession: and he had been looking forward to finding, in the active discharge of its duties, a relief from the blank left by the loss of Lucy Cleeve. Now he must be thrown utterly upon himself; an idle man. Everyone was very kind to him; from the Commander-inchief, with whom he had an interview, downwards evincing for him the truest respect and sympathy: but not one of them said, “Won’t you reconsider your determination and remain with us?” His Royal Highness civilly expressed regret at the loss Her Majesty would sustain in so good a servant; but he took the withdrawal as a matter that admitted of no question. There could be none. Captain Andinnian’s o
nly brother, escaping the gallows by an accorded favour, was working in chains on Portland Island: clearly the captain, brave and unsullied man though he individually was, could but hasten to hide his head in private life.
It was a happy thing for Karl that he had plenty of business on his hands just now. It saved him in a degree from thought. Besides his own matters, there were many things to see to for his mother. The house in Northamptonshire was given up, its furniture sold, its household, except Hewitt, discharged. Karl was on the spot and saw to it all. Whilst there, he had rather a struggle with himself. His natural kindliness of feeling prompted him to call and see Miss Turner: personally he shrunk from it, for he could not forget that it was through her all the misery had happened. He did violence to his inclination, and called. The young lady seemed to be in very depressed spirits, and said but little. The event seemed to have tried her much, and she was pale and thin. During the interval that had elapsed since the trial, her uncle, to whom she was much attached, had died. She told Karl that her aunt, Mrs. Turner, intended to remove at once to her native place, a remote district of Cumberland: Rose supposed she should have to remove with her. Mr. Turner had left a very fair amount of property. His wife was to receive the interest of it for her life; at her death the whole of it would come to Rose. As Karl shook hands with her on leaving, and wished her well, something he said was taken by her as alluding to the unhappy tragedy, though he had intended nothing of the sort. It had a strange effect upon her. She rose from her seat, her hands trembling; her face became burning red, then changed to a ghastly whiteness. “Don’t speak of it, Captain Andinnian,” she exclaimed in a voice of horror; “don’t hint at it, unless you would see me go mad. There are times when I think that madness will be my ending.” Again wishing her well, he took his departure. It was rather unlikely, he thought, that their paths would cross each other again in life.