by Linda Howard
“Those kinds of favors? What kind are we talking about?”
“The kind that do more harm than good. Look, you’re the head honcho. If anyone sees you walking me to my quarters, within two days I’ll be hearing snide comments about how I wouldn’t be on the team if I wasn’t playing footsie with you. It’s a hassle I can do without.”
“Ah,” he said as understanding dawned. “You’ve run into this before, haven’t you? No one thinks you can look like that and have a brain, too.”
She stared at him belligerently. “What do you mean, ‘look like that’? Just how do I look?”
She had the temperament of a hedgehog, but Joe had to fight the urge to put his arms around her and tell her that he would fight her battles for her from now on. She wouldn’t appreciate the gesture, and he wasn’t certain why he wanted to make it, since she appeared more than capable of waging her own wars. If he were smart, he would play it safe, make some noncommittal comment to keep from treading on her toes any further, but he hadn’t become a fighter pilot because he wanted to play it safe. “Fetching,” he replied, and his eyes were hard and bright and hungry.
She blinked, as if startled. She took a step back and said, “Oh,” in a soft, befuddled tone.
“You have to know you’re attractive,” he pointed out.
She blinked again. “Looks shouldn’t enter into it. You look like a walking recruiting poster, but it hasn’t hurt your career, has it?”
“I’m not defending discrimination,” he said. “You asked the question, and I answered it. You look fetching.”
“Oh.” She was watching him warily now as she sidled past.
He put his hand on her arm, stopping her. The feel of her smooth, warm flesh under his palm tempted him to explore, but he resisted. “If anyone here hassles you, Caroline, come to me.”
She darted an alarmed look at his hand on her arm. “Uh—yeah, sure.”
“Even if it’s a member of your own team. You’re civilians, but this is my project. I can have anyone replaced if he causes trouble.”
His touch was making her visibly jittery, and he studied her for a long minute, his brows drawing together in a slight frown, before he let her go. “I mean it,” he said in a gentler tone. “Come to me if you have any trouble. I know you don’t want me to walk you to your quarters, but I’m going in that direction anyway, since I’m turning in, too. I’ll give you a thirty-second head start, so we won’t be walking together. Is that okay?”
“Thirty seconds isn’t very long.”
He shrugged. “It’ll put about thirty yards between us. Take it or leave it.” He checked his watch. “Starting now.”
She immediately turned and fled. That was the only word for it. She all but hiked up that tight skirt and ran. Joe’s eyebrows climbed in silent question. When the thirty seconds were up, he left the building and caught sight of her slim figure, barely visible in the darkness and still moving at a fast clip. All the way to his own quarters, he pondered on what had turned an Amazon into a skittish filly.
Caroline slammed and locked the door to her Spartan quarters and leaned against the wood as she released her breath in a big whoosh. She felt as if she’d just had a narrow escape from a wild animal. What was the Air Force thinking, letting that man run loose? He should be locked up somewhere in the bowels of the Pentagon, where they could use him for their posters but keep the susceptible women of America safe.
Maybe it was his eyes, as pale blue and piercing as the lasers she worked on. Maybe it was the way he towered over her, or the graceful power of his muscular body. Maybe it was his deep voice, the particular note in it when he said she was “fetching,” or the heat of his lean, callused hand when he’d touched her. Maybe it was all of that, but what had all but panicked her had been the hungry, predatory gleam in those eyes when he’d looked at her.
She’d been doing well up until then. She had definitely been at her off-putting best, both arrogant and dismissive, which had never before failed to keep men at a safe distance. It was a trade-off; it kept her from being friends with her co-workers, but it also stopped any sexual advances before they started. She had battled her way out of so many clinches during college and graduate school and her early days on the job, that she had learned to go on the offensive from the beginning. With all of that experience, she should have been able to keep her composure, but one look from Colonel “Laser-Eye” Mackenzie, one slightly admiring comment, and she had lost both her composure and her common sense. She had been ignominiously routed.
Well, that was what happened when you had Ph. D.s for parents. They had seen the signs of superior intelligence in their only offspring and taken immediate steps to give her the schooling she deserved. All through elementary and high school she had been the youngest in her class, due to her accelerated progress. She hadn’t had one date in high school; she had been too weird, too gangly and awkward as she went through puberty two or three years after her classmates. It hadn’t been any better in college. She had started her freshman year right after her sixteenth birthday, and what college man in his right mind would go out with a girl who was legally still jailbait, when there were so many legal lovelies both willing and available?
Isolated and lonely, Caroline had devoted herself to her studies and found herself finishing her senior courses during her eighteenth year. At about the same time the guys in her classes had realized that the Evans girl might be an egghead, but she was easy on the eyes. This time, there was no issue of age to protect her. Having never learned dating skills with anyone her own age, she was totally at a loss on how to handle these…these octopuses who suddenly couldn’t seem to keep their hands off her. Disconcerted, alarmed, she had withdrawn further into her studies and begun developing a prickly shield for protection.
Her transformation as she reached maturity wasn’t drastic enough to equal that of an ugly duckling into a swan; she had simply grown from a gangly adolescent into a woman. Her menses had been late in coming, as if her body had to balance nature by dawdling along while her mind raced ahead. It was all a matter of bad timing. When her classmates were going through puberty, she was still literally playing with dolls. When she went through puberty, they were already settled into the dating game. She never matched them in terms of physical or emotional maturity. When she was ready to begin dating, she found herself being groped by boys accustomed to a much more sophisticated level of intimacy.
In the end, it was just easier to drive them all away.
So here she was, twenty-eight years old, genius IQ, a bona fide specialist in light amplification and optic targeting, possessed of a Ph.D. in physics, reduced to idiocy and panic because a man had said she was “fetching.”
It was disgusting.
It was also a bit frightening, because she sensed Colonel Mackenzie hadn’t been alienated as she had intended; instead, he’d looked like a man who enjoyed a challenge.
She hit herself on the forehead. How could she have been such an idiot? The colonel was a jet jockey, for heaven’s sake. He was a member of a different breed, a man who positively thrived on challenge. The way to keep from attracting his attention was to appear meek and mild, with maybe a little simpering thrown in. Problem was, she didn’t know how to simper. She should have gone to a finishing school rather than graduate school. She would have taken Simpering 101 over and over until she had it nailed.
Maybe it wasn’t too late. Maybe she could act sweet and helpless enough to fool him. No—that would invite attention from the men who did like that sort of behavior in a woman. She was caught—damned if she did and damned if she didn’t.
The only thing left to do was put up a good fight.
When Joe reached his quarters he stripped out of his uniform, then stood under a cool shower until he began to feel human again. The desert in July was a real bitch, sucking the moisture from his body until even his eyeballs felt dry, but Baby required tight security, and Nellis Air Force Base in Nevada supplied that, in spades. Despite the dis
comfort and spartan conditions, he was grateful for the security and didn’t look forward to taking the wraps off Baby, as would happen when Congress voted on funding. The media would see her then, not that her revolutionary nature was evident in her appearance; her design wasn’t radically different from that of the F-22, which was what made it possible for them to do the test flights at Nellis instead of Edwards in California, where test flights were traditionally made. Snoops looked for something different at Edwards, but here at Nellis, with so many different types of aircraft taking part in the war games they conducted, she wasn’t so obvious.
The other pilots based here had to notice that they were doing test flights with an aircraft that wasn’t exactly like the F-22, but no one who wasn’t working on the program was allowed a close look at the Night Wing prototypes, and security was a way of life here anyway. Baby’s differences were in her skin and in the electronics suite, her weapons system; when she was unveiled, she would galvanize every hostile espionage agency in the world, and security would have to be even tighter, though he didn’t see how it could.
He’d been thinking of Baby, but suddenly the image of Caroline Evans filled his mind and he grinned, wondering what it would take to tame the little hedgehog. Hiss kin suddenly felt hot and tight, despite the cool water, so he shut off the shower and stepped out of the cubicle. It he could get her in the shower with him, they would probably turn the water to steam.
He stood in front of the air conditioner, letting the cold air blow over his wet, naked body and enjoying the shivers that rippled over him, but it didn’t do much to ease the sense of fullness in his loins. Grimly he pushed thoughts of Ms. Evans out of his mind. When he was dry enough not to drip, he went, still naked, into the tiny kitchen area and slapped a sandwich together. The freedom from clothes let something inside him relax. He had spent almost half his life in the military, surrounded by regulations and wearing uniforms, and he felt comfortable with it at home, but at the same time there was still a primitive part of him that sometimes said, “That’s enough,” and he had to strip.
He had grown up on a horse ranch in Wyoming and he returned there every chance he got; spending a week or two riding the roughest broncs on the ranch satisfied the same wild restlessness in him, but he was tied up with the Night Wing project and couldn’t get any free time, so the clothes had to go. The only garment he ever regretted having to remove was his flight suit; if he could just spend all his time in the air, he’d be all right.
Damn it, the higher he was promoted, the less he flew. Responsibilities and paperwork took up more and more of his time. He had accepted the position of project manager on Night Wing only because he’d been guaranteed he would be able to fly the babies. The Air Force had wanted its best in the cockpits of the new planes, and the pilots assigned were all top-notch, but more than that, it had wanted the hands-on opinion of the best of the best, and Colonel Joe Mackenzie still stood head and shoulders above all the others.
Joe wasn’t vain about his skill with a fighter, because he’d worked too damn hard to attain it. He’d been born with the intellect, eyesight and lightning-fast reflexes, but the rest was the result of countless hours of study, of practice, of drilling himself in the flight simulator until every reaction was automatic and instantaneous. Even at the age of thirty-five his reaction time was still faster than that of the young Turks coming out of flight school, and his eyesight was still better than twenty-twenty. He had a lot of flying time left, if the military would let him have it. He’d shot up through the ranks so fast that he would probably get his first star in another year, and then he’d be lucky if he could wrangle enough flying time to remain qualified.
The alternative was to resign his commission to take a job with an aircraft manufacturer as a test pilot, throwing away his years in the military. He liked the Air Force, didn’t want to leave it, but the idea of being grounded was unbearable. Life would be flat without the challenge of mastering both nature and machine, and knowing his life hung in the balance if he didn’t do it right.
Caroline slid into his mind again, a challenge of a different sort plain in her gunslinger’s eyes. He could plainly picture the color of those eyes, dark green mostly, mingled with a bit of blue, and gold flecks lighting the depths. The thought of those eyes looking up at him as he moved over her in bed made his heart begin pounding hard and fast, just the way he would take her.
He wanted to make the little hedgehog purr like a kitten.
Chapter 2
Caroline had stringent comfort requirements, which meant it sometimes took her a while to get dressed. If something didn’t feel right on a particular day, she took it off and put on something else. Before she left for work each morning she sat, stretched, twisted, moved her arms back and forth, then lifted them over her head to see if her clothes were going to irritate her during the day. She couldn’t bear being distracted by an uncomfortable seam or an aggravating fit.
Women’s fashions were a sore point with her. Why were most designers men? She thought it should be against the law for a man to design women’s clothes. She had decided while still in adolescence that men had no idea how uncomfortable women’s fashions usually were and really didn’t care, since they themselves weren’t called upon to spend hours standing in tendon-shortening high heels, encased in sweltering hosiery, bound either by bras or dresses tight enough to take over the job of lifting and separating, or pushing together to create cleavage, according to the dictates of the occasion.
And why were women’s fashions made out of flimsy material, while the temperatures in most offices and restaurants was always set low, so the men in their suits would be comfortable? She found this stupid on two counts: one, why were men required to wear jackets anyway—and was there anything more ridiculous than that remnant of the breastplate, the necktie, that they knotted around their throats like a hangman’s noose, interfering with a few basic things like breathing and swallowing—and why weren’t women allowed to wear coats, too, if the men felt unable to give theirs up? Fashion, in her mind, consisted of equal parts stupidity and lunacy. In a logical world, people would wear functional clothing, like jeans and loafers and sweat-shirts.
She couldn’t change the world, but she could control her own small part of it by insisting on her own comfort. Today she chose a full, gathered white skirt that came to midcalf, with an elastic waistband. She topped it with an oversize white T-shirt and twisted two scarves, one melon and one aqua, together to be tied around her waist as a belt. Her shoes were white flats. She was cool, coordinated and comfortable, just the way she wanted to be.
During the night she had tried to analyze just what it was about Colonel Mackenzie that had so discomfited her; other men had come on to her like gangbusters and she’d managed to handle it, so why had his rather mild remark, coupled with a look that wasn’t mild at all, sent her into such panic? It was definitely the look that had done it. She’d never seen eyes like those before, pale blue diamonds glittering in a bronzed face, so piercing it felt as if they were cutting right into her flesh, and she’d sensed that the man behind them wasn’t like any man she’d met before, either.
There were several possible reasons, but none that she could pin down as the primary cause of her reaction. She would just have to handle herself as well as possible, keep her guard up and try to make certain there were always other people around whenever she had dealings with the colonel. Why couldn’t he have come around earlier the day before, when the rest of the team had still been working? If he had, she would have slept better last night.
She glanced around, making certain that everything was switched off, then patted her skirt pockets to assure herself that her keys were in there. Pockets were required; every outfit she wore had to have pockets, because handbags were another of her pet peeves. Why were women condemned to lug them around their entire lives? Why couldn’t women have pockets like men? Because fashion said that it ruined the “lines” of their clothes. Because women were thought to be
too vain. Because men were continually handing items to women with a casual, “Put this in your purse,” meaning, “So you can carry it and I won’t have to.” For women to be truly liberated, she thought, they should have burned their purses instead of their brassieres. And then thrown their high-heeled shoes onto the bonfire.
To keep from having to carry a bag, she had stocked her desk the day before with the grooming items she was likely to need during any given day. After all, not liking purses was no reason to go without lipstick. She did have personal standards to uphold.
She was normally the first person at work, and that morning was no exception. She liked mornings, and dawn in the desert was something special, with everything so clear and crisply outlined. Later in the day heat waves would blur the edges of the landscape, but right now it was perfect. She hummed as she made coffee. No matter how hot it got, coffee was a necessity in every workplace she’d ever seen.
She tore the wrapper off a honey bun, slapped the pastry into the microwave and zapped it for ten seconds. Breakfast was now ready. She settled into her chair and began rereading a report on the targeting system’s last performance as she absently pinched bites from the pastry.
Thirty minutes later Cal Gilchrist came in, looking surprised when he saw her at her desk. “You’re in early,” he said as he went straight to the coffeepot. “I didn’t see you at chow.”
“I ate a honey bun here.” Having finished reading, she tossed the report aside. Of the other three members of the team, Cal was the most amiable. To be honest, she admitted, he was more amiable than even herself. He was good-natured, friendly and capable, maybe thirty years old, still single and he enjoyed an active social life. She had met him before, but this was the first time they’d worked on a project together. They actually worked for two different companies, she with Boling-Wahl Optics, which had developed the laser targeting system, and Cal with DataTech, which had teamed with Boling-Wahl on the computer program that ran the system.