“All right, thanks,” Jax said.
“Sure, but it you should probably remember that snow doesn't give you anywhere near as much water as ice does. In a pinch, you should always melt ice first.”
“Oh, I didn't know that."
“Yup, the water content is way higher. Do you have a tarp?”
“No, not really,” Jax said. All he had was the worn cloth he had always used for his tent.
“Well, we will get you one. You can use them for shelter.”
“Thank you,” he said, wondering what was in it for Blake.
“Why are you trying to get people up here anyway?” Jax asked him as they paused outside one teepee and grabbed a large, neatly folded blue tarp. Blake handed it to Jax, who tucked it inside his bag.
“You ever tried settling in a commune with only a handful of people? It's not easy. There's a lot of work to be done. But it is safer, and we do all right. It's especially nice during the spring and summer. And we all get along, and none of us are angry and violent. It's a safe place. Everybody deserves a safe place.”
Jax considered this and nodded, and they finally reached the opening of Roger's teepee. They ducked inside and Roger greeted them warmly.
“Is this a new recruit?" he asked.
“No," Blake said. "This is Jonathan's brother, Jax. The one he spoke about so often."
Roger's face fell and he shirked away from Jax and Jax understood immediately that he felt guilty for abandoning his brother in the elements during the attack. He wanted to be angry at Roger, but looking at him, he could only feel a pang of pity. He had a small child in his lap, smiling up at him, and a beautiful woman behind him at the fire, stirring a small pot of soup. Roger had a family; he had a family like Jax had Layne. He would've done the same thing if he found himself in danger. He couldn't leave Layne on her own to fend for herself in a world like this. Even if there was safety at their homestead.
“Look, Al told me what happened and I'm not mad at you. I just need to know where you last saw my brother and I was wondering if you could take me. I know it's probably scary and dangerous, but I would really appreciate it. I need to understand what happened.”
The woman stopped stirring the pot and looked suddenly and intensely at Roger. The child stopped cooing and noticed the tension in the room. She looked between all of the people there and tilted her head in confusion. She reached her hand up to Roger, combing her fingers through his little beard, and Roger gripped her tiny hand in his own and pulled it away from his face.
“I'd be happy to show you where I saw him last. But we might be ambushed there. I'll take you most of the way, but I'll have to come back for my family. They are my only reason for living, and I have to be there for them.”
“I understand," Jack said with a nod. “It's a deal.”
Chapter 7
They set off early in the morning, and Jax noticed with interest that the small snowfall had turned into a large one, blanketing the world around them in icy white flakes.
Roger led him for a day and a half, marking a trail by breaking evergreen branches, and stopped finally in a clearing.
“This is where they got us," Roger said sadly. “I don't know what happened, I just panicked and did the only thing I knew how to do. I escaped with my life. I feel terrible about it, but maybe in a way bringing you here was my opportunity to try and make it up to your brother. I don't know if he got killed because of me, but if he did I'm really sorry.”
He didn't give Jax an opportunity to reply before he turned his back and walked away from him, heading back to the settlement with his warm teepee and little family. Jax watched him go for a moment before approaching the clearing. His feet crunched loudly in the snow, and he shivered as his face splintered with the cold. So his brother had been here. It had been a couple of weeks. Well, more like a month now, but he had been here.
Jax didn't know what to do from there except to give himself the allotted time frame that he and Layne had agreed upon to look for any sign of Jonathan. If he couldn't find him within two weeks and everything looked hopeless, he had to go back.
And so Jax began wandering in the cool countryside. It didn't take long for him to discover a cave in a cliff face. He poked his head in with interest, cautious of animals who may already be inside the dwelling. He let his eyes adjust for a moment and saw that nothing else was living inside before ducking in to explore. Maybe Jonathan had been there. His heart was brimming with the possibility of seeing his brother again. He couldn't wait to finally embrace him and apologize for all the years of being without him. He felt so close he could touch it.
Jax made his way carefully down the cave, and suddenly found his foot caught on something. He nearly tripped over it and cursed, lowering himself into a crouch and examining the contents on the floor. Suddenly, his heart started to pound painfully. His food had wound around the strap of a bag.
It was a bag that he recognized.
A bag that belonged to his brother.
It had everything in there. His essentials. They were things that he would never have left behind, even if he was just going out to take a piss. He would've taken them wherever he went, which meant that something must have happened to him. Something terrible.
Jax burned with grief as his shaking hands sifted through his brother's belongings. Everything was hopeless now. He would never see his brother again. They had left everything in shambles, their relationship broken and cold, and there was no way that he would ever be able to apologize for it.
The sudden realization brought Jax to the floor. Everything was meaningless now without his brother. Nobody would ever be able to make him feel better. Everything was miserable and unfair. The virus; the circumstances of his brother's parting. He didn't even care that Layne was in their homestead, waiting for him to come back. She would never be able to understand his grief. He was completely alone.
He suddenly got to his feet and ran out of the cave as fast as he could. His only living family member was gone. Layne's had been gone for a long time already, he knew, she was used to having nobody. But this was a new feeling for him. He had never felt more alone and hopeless.
He pulled one of the bottles of beer from his sack and chugged it down as quickly as he could, glancing at Layne's note and crumpling it up before reading it. Somehow, he blamed her for this. If he hadn't gotten involved with her, he might have found his brother by now. He could have saved him.
He left the note, allowing it to grow soggy on the wet, icy ground as he began staggering around in the snow and crying loudly. He was drunk and full of agony, and he stumbled, falling face first onto the ground. The coldness bit his face, and it almost felt good. He would give up. He passed out in the snow, waiting to die and join his brother.
***
Layne tossed and turned. She was used to sleeping on her stomach, but ever since she had gotten sick, she had felt sensitive everywhere. She had taken to keeping a bucket near her bed in case she needed to throw up again. The illness was persistent, although it didn't seem to drain her of any energy. That was fortunate, and she continued to use her daily routine to give her the motivation that she needed to continue cultivating food and water for the homestead.
She tried to count her blessings instead of focusing on all of the ways that she was sad and miserable. Being alone made her more likely to remember all of the pain that she suffered when she lost her family to the virus. Her friends and everybody else that she had loved before the virus hit were gone. She had been left to fend for herself and deal with the aftermath, feeling very guilty that somehow she had been able to survive at all without any problems.
She found herself falling into a deep depression, but she did her best to avoid her troubling thoughts and worked harder and harder in the garden. The activity seemed to help and alleviated some of her nausea. She enjoyed the fresh air, even though it was beginning to grow crisp with the frost.
One evening, she heard the sound of breaking branches, and nearly
hyperventilated. She didn't know who it was, but she hoped that it was Al, bringing some new recruits through the forest. Still, she didn't know who it was and she was vulnerable and alone, so she crept as quietly as she could inside the cabin and shut and locked the door. She situated herself at the window, loading the rifle and cocking it in case she saw anybody encroaching. She wouldn't be as kind as Jax. If anybody came and saw her homestead, she planned to shoot. There was no telling who might be infected, and the carriers tended to travel in groups. Most of them were so angry and bitter and guilty that they were addicts who traded whatever they could find for drugs that would help them drown away their sorrows. That meant that they were a danger to her and to everyone else - whether they could be infected by them still or not. It was hard to tell whether or not the carrier's virus had lain dormant. Nobody had tested them and everybody who was still alive was immune.
Fortunately, a large deer emerged from the foliage and she lowered the gun, sighing in relief. She had been worried that it was a group of carriers, but it was just a flock of deer who had smelled her delicious vegetables. She hoped that they would leave it alone, but she was in such a good mood after the flood of relief that she would have gladly shared with them.
Thinking of the carriers ignited her anxiety. What would happen to humanity next? She was concerned that the new population may or may not be able to thrive and flourish. Children who were exposed to the virus probably wouldn't live very long. However, it was possible that with two parents who carried strong genes, they would be able to survive. She felt a twinge of nausea as she thought about the infants who were both vulnerable and innocent. She was glad that she and Jax wouldn't have to worry about that yet. All she had to do was focus on surviving until he came back.
***
Jax woke up from a frenzied dream, groaning in appreciation as Layne's mouth nibbled him and stroked his groin. He found himself burning with longing, a nice distraction from the hole in his heart, but pushed her off of him in confusion as he opened his eyes. It wasn't Layne, and it wasn't totally a dream. There was a woman there and he was inside a strange room that was dim and smelled like the earth.
She looked at him, her ruby red lips smiling seductively. He scowled at her and backed away, his heart thudding. Although she was beautiful, she had startled him and he felt invaded. Still, he had to admit that he was painfully aroused and his body was begging for more of her touch.
“So you're alive then," she grinned, peering down at his groin. “I see the blood is pumping after all.” He glowered at her and covered himself with his hand. Fortunately, he was still dressed, but she had peeled off his wet outer layers and laid the clothes in front of a fireplace to dry.
“Where am I?" he asked.
“You're in Tel Alur,” she said with a grin. “We inhabit the underground city and I brought you there. Did you have a death wish or something? You know it's easy enough to die without stupidity on your side."
“What does it matter? It's none of your business. I just so happen to have lost somebody very special to me."
“Who, Jonathan?” she asked, her lips stretching into another sultry smile. His heart thudded at the mention of his brother's name.
“Actually, he's fine. He was in to see you before you woke up, but he had to leave again.”
“Are you kidding me?" he growled, gripping her wrists in his strong hands.
“Oh, I like it when men are feisty with me," she said with a wink. Her dark brown eyes twinkled and she ran her hand through her jet black hair. He felt another pulse of longing in his groin, and felt tempted to give in to it. He was still irrationally angry at Layne. Regardless, he forced himself to look away from the woman. If Jonathan was alive, there was hope. But if she had only heard his name while he was in a fevered dream state, then she was simply trying to fuck with him. He had to find out which one it was.
“Where did he go? If that's even true," Jax said, fixing a dark glare on the woman.
“Well, we are preparing for war after all, so it makes sense that he would have plenty to keep him busy.”
“War? Jonathan isn't into war," Jax said, shaking his head in disbelief.
“Maybe not, but he needs to save his friend. They were both abducted not too long ago by a really mean group who call themselves the Phantoms. They think they are sooo badass because they can survive in the snow. They only do it because they eat anything, even people. They're trying to fatten up your brother's friend right now. Fortunately, Jonathan was smart enough to escape. His friend wasn't so lucky, so we're all going to retaliate and get rid of the problem once and for all. We want to keep things peaceful up here in the North. Believe it or not. It's all rather exciting,” she said, moving close to Jonathan and pulling a blanket around his shoulders.
She touched his cheek, her beautiful face sparkling with excitement. She was toying with him, testing her power. He wished it wasn't working, but he could feel the yearning in his body, strong and prominent. It had been nearly a month since he'd had any kind of release, and this woman was dangerously close to opening a floodgate he would rather keep closed.
“Please, go get my brother,” he said sternly, turning away from her.
She seemed surprised, but somehow pleased at his rejection, and nodded, pulling her hand away and turning on her heel. He purposely avoided looking at her swaying hips and sultry, curvy body, and instead pouted at the wall.
And then he was being pulled into a bear hug and the spicy scent of his brother was filling his nostrils. Jax opened and closed his mouth, almost ready to vomit from the emotional toll of what he'd just experienced.
“I thought I'd never see you again,” he breathed.
“Here I am,” Jonathan said with a wink. It was too good to be true. Maybe he really had died in the cold and it was all a dream.
“I'm so glad you're here,” Jonathan exclaimed, hugging Jax again. “We need all the help we can get.”
“You...wait, you mean in this war thing?”
“Yeah!”
“Jon, I can't...”
“What?” Jonathan asked, his face falling in disappointment.
“Look, I know it's important to you, but I have somewhere to go. A home. Somebody waiting for me. I just needed to know if you're all right. Al came by and told me about you and I had to see for myself. I missed you so much...”
Now that they were together again, there were no words that felt sufficient enough to explain what he'd been through. The terrible guilt and misery he'd felt when he believed he was truly alone in the world. He had nearly killed himself in his grief, but somehow, he'd been brought to this woman's room and spared.
“I missed you too,” Jonathan said. His face had aged considerably, and he looked much older with the scruff thick around his face. “Listen, we're still in the planning stages. Talk to your family; think it over. We seriously need the help. We could get killed out there, but I know how skilled you are. You could make or break this thing for us.”
“Forget about it,” Jonathan begged, gripping his brother's forearm. “Just come back with me. We have everything you'd need. I swear, it's perfect.”
“I'm sure it is,” Jonathan said, pulling gently out of his brother's grip. “But this expedition was my idea. I'm responsible for risking those men's lives. I can't just leave him there to die. Not when there's something I can do to save him. You can help me or you can go home; those are your choices. It's not safe for you to stay if you're not going to be a part of this. I'd rather you were safe anyway, little brother. You have no stake in this war.”
Jax opened and closed his mouth in disbelief. He had finally found his brother, but after all this, he might very well lose him again in a needless battle to save one man's skin.
“It's not just for me,” Jonathan said, lightly punching Jax on the shoulder. “I need to safeguard the future of the children in the community up there. It's a really solid place, you know. They're trying to start something special. Get a real society going again. Not li
ke the turf-war cult hell down south. I'm behind this one hundred percent. Maybe when this is over, you and your family can join us. You'll know where to find me.”
He winked at Jax and turned away, walking out the doorway. And just like that, his brother was gone again.
Chapter 8
“How did it go with your brother?” the sultry woman asked when she returned to her bedroom. Her voice brought another surge of longing to his loins as he remembered the way it felt when she was touching him in his sleep. But he was also angry and disgusted by her and refused to meet her gaze.
“It's not really any of your business," Jax snapped at her. She smiled, a glow that radiated from across the room, and Jax darkened in response.
“It must not have gone well," she said, coming toward him.
“Please, just leave me alone," he said, looking her in the eye. “There is somebody that I love.”
“Well, she's quite lucky. You're very handsome.”
And with that, the smiling woman disappeared, leaving him alone in the room. He walked over to the fireplace cursing at himself for feeling such an intense burst of longing that he would have no release for. He pulled his clothes on, groaning in discomfort as they grazed his erection, and grabbed his backpack. He was going to head back home to be reunited with the woman he loved most. The woman who he missed so much that he almost resented loving her in the first place.
***
The journey was long and grueling, just as he remembered it on the way there. Unfortunately, it was even harder with the harsh elements working against him. He dug himself a little hole in the snow, creating a wall where the wind was the fiercest and pulled half of the tarp over it. He put the other half of the tarp on the ground to prevent himself from getting wet, packing the snow tightly to create a firm platform. He was elated with the knowledge that his brother was alive, and happy that he knew exactly where to find him. But he was also worried that the pointless war he was fighting might leave him without a family left to speak of.
BRICK (Forsaken Riders MC Romance Book 17) Page 115