“You call this fun?” A voice booms in my ear.
I shrink away and spin around clumsily. Jack stands beside me wearing his gray pea coat and a pained expression.
“I thought you weren’t into this scene anymore,” I say. I’m so surprised to see him standing there that my muscles clench where they shouldn’t.
“I’m not.” He strains to be heard over the sound of the music. "I used to be, but that was a long time ago."
“Then why are you here?” I take another drink of water.
“I wasn't finished talking to you,” he says simply.
“You came here just to talk to me?” I ask.
“Yes. Can we leave here?”
“Well, I’m here with my friend,” I point to the dance floor. "Why don't you stay?"
"I thought I made it clear that I don't like clubs," he shouts, his face so incredibly attractive. His white button down is glowing almost purple in the black light of the club.
"Oh, come on. You’re too young to be sitting at home at 11:30 on a Saturday night. Let yourself live a little!" I turn the water up and take another drink.
"Fine, but you have to come sit with me. Deal?"
"Only if you agree to dance with me," I counter.
"No," Jack raises both hands in the air in defiance. "I don't dance."
"Well, I don't sit," I challenge. "Either you come dance with me or you'll have to resign yourself to the fact that you drove all the way here from wherever you went when you left the bar for nothing."
"Do you always have to have your way?" Jack asks, giving me the first true smile since he got here.
"Yes, when I can get it," I answer, finishing my water.
"Fine. One song, one. Then you're parking your sweet ass in a chair and talking to me. Now do we have a deal?"
The last few songs have been real get down on it songs and I know it's time for a slow one. Jack's big hands on my waist, holding me close. I'll be able to breathe him in as deep and as much as I want. And he thinks I have a sweet ass.
I hold out my hand. "Deal." His fingers brush mine and I swear there are sparks, audible and visual sparks as we touch.
I squeal as Jack takes my whole hand, his eyes slanted in determination, and leads me toward the dance floor. He spots an empty table, pulls off his coat, and slings it over the chair without stopping.
Allie is dancing with some guy I don't know and I wave to her as Jack leads me onto the checkerboard floor. She shoots me a surprised expression followed by an excited thumbs up. The last beat of the song dies out and another slower one starts up.
We manage as close to the middle of the dance floor as the crowd will allow and Jack slides his arm around my waist in one smooth move. I put one hand on his broad shoulder, inexplicably happy just to be touching him.
A whiney saxophone starts up accompanied by Edwin McCain's scratchy voice. The song hushes everyone on the dance floor and Jack pulls me against his body even tighter.
The strands in your eyes that color them wonderful stop me and steal my breath.
Jack pulls my arm up and puts it closer to his neck, squeezing me so close to him that I feel his belt buckle above my belly button. I'm almost pleasantly suffocating on the smell of his skin. He moves slowly to the music, every movement of his body sending out tiny tendrils of his scent to invade my head.
"You know, I have to say, this ain't half bad." Jack smiles at me, tiny dimples forming at the edge of his beard.
"Oh my god, he knows how to have fun!" I cry.
"Cut it out or I'll dip you when this is over."
"You wouldn't dare," I challenge.
Jack's eyes are alight at being tempted.
"Oh, I. Would. Dare." Each word comes out with a deliberate intensity. If he’s trying to do something to me, he’s doing it. He nuzzles into my hair and I can feel him breathe me in.
I'll be captivated. I'll hang from your lips instead of the gallows of heartache that hang from above.
He reaches up and takes my hand, holding it out like they do in old movies as we move together. His thick forearm is curled around my waist, claiming me if only for the few minutes of the song. This is what sexy feels like; this is how a man is supposed to hold a woman.
I let myself touch him, really feel the curve of thick muscle underneath his shirt, his hot and slightly sweaty palm. It's almost as if I've been pulled from some other time in my life, a time when I would've let myself want someone like him. I inhale and exhale, each breath bringing his smell into me.
And rain falls angry on the tin roof. As we lie awake in my bed. You're my survival, you're my living proof. My love is alive and not dead.
"How did you really find me, Jack? And why?" I ask, looking up at him to see his face when he answers.
He takes a minute to gather his thoughts.
"Let's just say when I ran into you last night...it just struck something in me. And as far as the how, you really shouldn't tell horny porn store owners like Bub where you work." He gives me a wink and I smile.
The brief encounter with him struck something in me, too. But of course, I keep my mouth shut and just lean into him. He just gave me the best possible answer to my question, so why can't I say something nice back? I feel it, but why the fuck can't I say it? The heat he causes in my body and the way parts of me respond to his voice, his touch…am I not supposed to say these things to him? His eyes move from my eyes to my mouth, where they linger. I bite at my lip a little, just to get a reaction.
I'll be your crying shoulder. I'll be love’s suicide. And I'll be better when I'm older, I’ll be the greatest fan of your life.
I let Jack pull me closer to him, sliding his other arm around me. I wrap my arms around his neck and it feels like nothing I've ever felt before. We’re so close to each other that my body assumes this is a precursor to sex and starts to respond, first with a dampening of my panties and a tingling of my nipples. His jaw line tenses in the glow of the lights and I feel his hands start to venture down my hips a little before he stops himself. My breath hitches in my throat and I start to tell him how he makes me feel.
The song drifts away and immediately goes into a Rihanna song. The mood is broken and I missed my chance.
"That's it," he says, leaning away from me and breaking the tangle of us. "You got your dance, now come sit with me." Jack doesn't wait for an answer and pulls me by the hand away from the dance floor. Allie tries to motion us over, but I point to Jack and toward where our table is.
My body is so flushed with heat and sexual frustration that I have to fan my face to cool my cheeks.
"Another water?" Jack offers.
I nod at him, still fuming at myself for not speaking up on the dance floor. I'm such a chicken shit. I watch as he disappears into the throng of people around the bar. I spot Allie and her mystery guy headed toward our table.
"Shew, I'm burning up!" she says, fanning herself with her hand. "Would you mind running over and grabbing me a bottle of Corona?" She bats her eyelashes at her guy and he nods all too eagerly. He's younger than me, probably younger than Allie, with a thin body that probably became a man only a couple of years ago. He heads toward the bar and I shake my head. Her penchant for younger men always puzzles me.
"What's your ten doing here?" she asks.
"He came here looking for me." I try to play it off, to not show how happy I am, but Allie sees through it.
"Well, well, well," she says, her eyes focusing on me before widening. "Is he why you decided to finally break it off with Nick? Did you set this up?" Allie loves a good scandal and as much as I'd love to pretend I knew Jack would show up, I can't lie to her.
"No, I didn't set anything up. I asked him at the bar if he'd come, but he said he doesn't go to clubs anymore. He just appeared out of nowhere."
"He appeared out of your wet dream, Carly," she says. "I watched how he danced with you. And how you danced with him. You like him." She grins at me. Not a smile, but her sneaky, knowing grin.
"Shut up," I say, in attempt to keep her from grinning at me like that. "He's probably just after a piece of ass."
Do I really believe this? I've been hurt by thinking otherwise a time or two, before Nick and I came to the agreement we had about what we wanted. It was easier to put it out there, to not pretend and just have a good time together. Eventually, the situation got to where most of the fun was Nick's, but still, there was no confusion about what each of us could expect.
"You don't know that," Allie protests. "He could be interested in more." She looks so hopeful, so typically optimistic. “And it looks like you want him, either way.”
I can’t argue with her, not if I’m honest with myself.
Allie's boy and Jack finally make it to the table with our drinks. Jack has my water in one hand and three shots of something dark haphazardly balanced in the other.
"Here ya are," he says, sitting my bottle on the table. He puts the shots down on the table; one for me, one for Allie and one for her friend.
"Oh, I'm not drinking tonight. I drew the short straw, so it’s just the water for me."
"The short straw?" Jack asks.
"We draw straws to see which of us gets to drink when we come here. Whoever gets the short straw has to take care of the other one," I explain.
"I guess that means you got the long straw?" Jack asks Allie.
"You guessed correctly, sir," she grins. She grabs my shot, downs it with a wince and then chases it with half of the Corona. We both watch her and I shake my head.
"Oh, Jack, this is Allie the alcky. Allie, this is Jack." I gesture back and forth between them.
"Nice to meet you," Jack says, shaking Allie's hand. Her flavor of the night eyes Jack, actually jealous. If Jack was Allie's type, I'd bet neither of us would stand a chance.
"So, you came here looking for my Carly, huh?" Allie starts. I give her a begging look, followed by a threatening look. Do not continue.
"I did." He puts his arm around my chair and scoots me closer to him. I can't help but smile at Allie and she gives me another grin.
"What are your plans for her, now that you found her?" She picks up another shot and slams it with a grimace. Her boy toy, who she still hasn't introduced, watches her, apparently content to be ignored so long as he gets to stand next to her.
"I don't have any plans," Jack says simply. "I just wanted to see her."
He brings another smile out of me and I fight to hide it. Allie's eyes tell me she's seen it.
"Well, since you two are over here looking at each other, Sean and I are going to dance." Allie finishes off the last shot, grabs her boy toy by the shirt and without so much as a good-bye, the crowd engulfs them.
"It's a good thing you're not drinking," Jack says. "I'd hate for you to get drunk and fall prey to whatever your friend thinks I’m gonna do to you."
"You'd hate it, huh?" I ask. I take a long drink of the water and look sideways at him.
"Maybe hate was the wrong word," he says, giving me a wink. For someone who looked so uncomfortable in the bar, he looks so at ease here. At ease and a little ornery.
"Then I'll start drinking now. I wouldn't want to make you stop chasing me."
Jack smiles, his dimples appearing to accentuate it. He's so beautiful, so perfect. And he seems to like me. Just how quickly will I fuck this up? I wonder.
"I need to go to the restroom," I say. The water has decided it's been in me long enough and the need to pee is suddenly desperate. I grab my purse and stand.
Jack scoots his chair back to make a path for me to pass, but I have to move my ass in front of him to get by. I look down at him with a grin. He returns with a side of smolder. Damn, I want to kiss that mouth.
There's no line at the bathroom, surprisingly, so I pee quickly and wash my hands. My feet want to carry me back to Jack quickly, but that's thrown aside as soon as I leave the bathroom.
"Hey, um, Allie's friend," Sean, at least I think his name was Sean, yells at me over the music. He's holding Allie by the arm and I already know why he's sought me out. I shake my head and get ready for damage control.
"She puked on my fucking shoes," Sean says. I look at his feet and sure enough, he's wearing Allie's vomit. She looks at me apologetically, her eyes barely open.
"Sorry about that," I offer. "I've got her." Sean hands her over like a dirty jacket and walks away staring at his feet. Usually, when this happens, it doesn’t happen for at least another hour or two. I scan the crowd hoping to see Jack. I finally spot him and he sees me. I motion for him.
"Hold on, Allie Cat," I say as she sways a little in my arms. I hate that she gets so shit faced. She had to have been drinking on the dance floor to have gotten here so fast.
Jack makes his way over and eyes Allie's wobbly form. He looks at me and raises his eyebrows.
"Guessing I shouldn't have bought those shots, huh?" he asks, pulling on his coat.
"If you hadn't, someone else would've," I say. "Would you hold on to her and let me go pay our tab?"
Jack leans in close so I can hear and I get to stare into his eyes for a second before he speaks.
"I already took care of it." He smiles at me, those dimples and those lips blessing my eyes.
"Thanks, but you shouldn't have."
"Don't mention it. Here, let me help you get her outside." Jack puts Allie's other arm around his shoulders and hoists her up.
We walk Allie out of the bar and toward my car. Jack supports her while I open the door and try to keep her from falling head first into the seat. She'll probably be fine in an hour and bitching about why I made her leave early.
Jack closes the door and comes around to my side of the car.
"And you ask why I avoid nightclubs," he mutters.
The wind whips up a little and blows my hair around my face. I fight with it before finally taming it behind my ear. Jack watches me, his dark eyes observant and interested. He puts his hands in his coat pockets.
"I should probably get her home," I say.
"Want me to follow you?" Jack offers.
"Nah, we'll be fine. I've done this a time or ten before," I joke. I suppress a shiver as a cold gust of air moves between us.
"Well, I guess this is goodbye, Carly." He takes his hand from his pocket and reaches out for mine. I lay my hand against his fingers and he pulls it to his lips. He plants a soft kiss on the back of my hand. "Thanks for the dance."
I don't even know what to say. Allie and I make fun of things like this, neither of us willing to admit that we'd find it incredibly attractive if a man ever did this to us. She's snoozing from boozing in my car while it happens to me.
"You're very welcome, Jack." I study his face as he peers up at me, cataloguing every aspect of it to my memory. He releases my hand and backs away. I want to call out to him, to tell him I've changed my mind and he can follow me home, but I don't. I open the car door and watch as he climbs inside a beat up silver Chevy. He starts it up, the exhaust idling with a subtle rumble. He drives the truck around to the exit as I climb inside my car.
I watch as his taillights disappear before starting the car. Allie snores a little as I put the car in drive and pull out onto the highway.
"You owe me big time, bitch," I say to her sleeping form. She mumbles a drunken response and I drive to my house, the feeling of Jack's strong arm around my waist and his lips on my hand swimming in my head.
§
Allie sleeps on my couch, but her snores carry through the wall and into my bedroom. I lie there at 3 a.m. and stare at the dark wall.
God, what a screwed up night. I completely ended things with Nick, pressed my body against a perfect stranger and he kissed my hand. Three simple things that when put together, meant a big change deep inside of me. In the darkness, I run my fingers over the skin on the back of my hand. His kiss still lingers there, burned in my skin. I've been branded by him with only a kiss.
I toss and turn, the replay of the dance keeps playing in my head. I wish I would've said somet
hing, anything when he told me I'd struck something in him. It had been exactly like that; like a giant gong rang out in the center of me.
My bed is part of this conspiracy to deprive me of sleep and I just can't get comfortable. My phone lights up on the nightstand.
Where are you? Are you home?
I have no desire to talk to Nick, so I ignore it and try to fall asleep, but my phone dings again almost instantly.
Did you go home with that big fucker?
I put it back on the nightstand, determined to ignore him. Ding, ding.
Fucking answer me, Carly.
I sigh out of frustration and furiously type at him.
Yes, I came home with him and I'm trying to suck his dick, so leave me alone.
There. That should shut him the fuck up. He always tried to get me to give him head, but I almost always refused. For some reason, giving Nick that pleasure made me feel more used than anything else we did. I lie there waiting for the phone to light up again, but it doesn't. I finally fall asleep, images of deep, dark eyes and the sensation of strong, capable hands come to me and I sleep fitfully.
§
Allie manages a hangover as well as she does the liquor that gets her there, so she's whiney and irritable the next morning.
"God, my head. I swear I didn't drink that much, Carls." Her blonde hair is smooshed against her head and lines crisscross her face from the pillowcase she slept on. She looks like complete and total hell.
"Well, you certainly threw up enough," I say, pouring her a big mug of black coffee.
"I think he slipped me something," Allie says. "I feel like I felt the other time I was roofied."
Allie got drunk at a frat party last year and ended up being saved by her old roommate before anyone decided to make her their penis pincushion. She was sick for two days afterward.
"I keep telling you to be more careful. I'm sorry I wasn't watching out for you better than I did." I slide the mug of coffee across the counter to her.
"You were busy," Allie says, her eyes finally opening for longer than a second. She leans her head on one hand and takes a drink of the coffee.
"No excuse," I say. "I got the short straw and I should've taken better care of you."
Save Me (Saved Series, Book One) Page 4