She shook her head, turning away again. “I shouldn’t speak such things. Mayhaps the wine has caused me to imagine things that are not. It’s not often that I partake. Once my head clears, we’ll speak about it then.”
“Whether wine or water, your thoughts will remain the same. The inebriant only brings that to the surface which we attempt to suppress. Please, tell me your thoughts.”
“I don’t understand my thoughts, or…or my feelings. It’s impossible, yet I feel it as plainly as I see you beside me.” She sighed. “Please, think of it no more, Pentanimir. My feelings are of little matter.”
He slid closer, not turning from her eyes. “What you feel?” Is it possible she’s drawn to me as I am to her? “Brahanu, please share with me your thoughts. What’s on your mind is of the greatest importance and consequence. I much desire your words.”
“I—I want to tell you, but this shouldn’t be. We’ve only just met, yet I feel like I’ve known you the entirety of my life. When you look at me, all of me, a heat rises from the pit of my stomach. I’ve never felt that from anyone, save my promised, Itai. Even then, it wasn’t like this. The desire and longing attempts to overwhelm me, and I’m ashamed to admit it.” She shook her head, taking a steadying breath. “It’s just the talk of a foolish young woman. Please, think no more of it.”
He edged closer, gently caressing her cheek. The tingle of pleasure left in the wake of that touch caused a surging heat within the both of them.
“Brahanu, don’t fear what’s in your heart. Know that it’s felt within mine as well.”
“But how can you know that it’s not false? What does your heart say to you?”
“Know this: I’ve desired you since the first we met. It isn’t merely your physical beauty, it’s everything, every part of you. I can’t explain what you bring forth within me. It’s passion, desire, heat, all of it, and I can scarcely contain the hunger within me. I feel like a starving man offered a place at a high lords table,” he said, drawing her into him. He moaned as his lips met hers. “It’s not foolish talk of a young woman, for I feel it, too.” His tongue encircled hers, tasting every part of her.
Brahanu trembled beneath his touch, wanting more of him, all of him. No one had ever touched her so, and she was lost in the feeling, clutching at his back and shoulders. “Pentanimir,” she whimpered, sliding her hands down to feel his arousal.
“Gods, Brahanu, gods,” he whispered against her lips. “I want you now. It’s wrong, but I can’t help the yearning within me.”
“Why is it wrong? I want you to be a part of me, Pentanimir, first and always.”
Pentanimir’s eyes widened as he loosened his hold on her. That statement caused some of the turbidity in his mind to clear. He hadn’t known that she was maiden, or had he merely wished that she wasn’t? We can’t do this. I can’t do this. I won’t , he thought, pushing away.
“What’s wrong?”
“Brahanu, we can’t,” Pentanimir said, fighting against the throbbing ache of his arousal.
“Why can’t it be so? You desire me as I do you.”
“Yes, I do, more than you know, but we can’t. I’m not meant to be your first. Such intimacies should be shared with your promised. With Itai,” Pentanimir said, as much for Brahanu as himself. “I don’t want to lose you, but you were never truly mine. You belong to another, and you love him even now. Forgive me. I shouldn’t have kissed you. I’m a Chosen, and I won’t dishonor you, Itai, myself, or Denotra.
“Please forgive me,” he added, staring at the unjudging ground. Pushing up to his feet, he fought against the almost irrepressible yearning to return to her side. He’d never had a desire so strong and his entire body felt emaciated and weak with that separation.
Brahanu said nothing. Her muddled mind couldn’t navigate the intensity of her emotions or the pain of his rejection. The ache wasn’t a mere mental anguish. It was all encompassing, grieving her more than she could comprehend.
“If you’re able, my lady, we should prepare to leave.” His voiced cracked with the words. “We’ll stop to water the horses and rest when the sun begins to set. I don’t think it’s wise to stop again until we reach the settlement.” Forgive me, Brahanu. My desire overshadowed my mind.
“As you say.” She rose up, forcing back her tears. When she began to speak, she only shook her head, turning away from him.
“Please, Brahanu, talk to me.”
“There’s nothing left to say. We should pack the horses.”
“That can wait. You’re more important to me than that. Please.”
She was more conflicted now than when first they’d met. Looking into his eyes, and feeling his touch ignited something within her…something that couldn’t be subdued.
“I—I wanted a moment to wash in the falls. It’s warmer now with the sun’s rise, and I’d like a chance to cleanse. I understand if we haven’t the time.”
“This is a small request, and I should’ve offered it myself. We’ll not have another opportunity, and your clothes and hair are soiled from the storm. We should both change before we continue to the settlement. Come, there’re fresh tunics and covers in the satchels.”
Pentanimir pulled out a few items, placing them on the ground at the water’s edge. “I’ll enter here, and there’s another just there,” he said, gesturing to a small outcropping. “It’ll offer you some privacy.”
He waited for Brahanu to disappear behind the large rock before stripping off his clothes. The gelid falls helped to sober his mind and repress his arousal. He couldn’t understand why Brahanu captivated him so. He needed to be with her, and physically ached not being able to do so. It wasn’t merely being a part of her, although his throb increased at the thought.
He closed his eyes, drenching his hair and face. That calmed his trepidation but a moment until he felt the light touch on his shoulder. As he whipped around, his mouth gaped, staring at Brahanu’s stunning nakedness.
Every part of her body glistened: small beads of water trickling down her mahogany skin. Gods, she’s beautiful! Why must I be tempted? he thought as his body betrayed his desires. When she gazed down his abdomen, he twisted around, stammering.
“Brahanu? Why—why have you come? Do you need something?”
“Yes,” she said, turning him back around to face her. She smiled, examining every inch of him. She didn’t fear her feelings anymore, or attempt to assign reason to that which was void of it.
“Need?” she repeated. “I need you to look at me. I need to feel your hands on me. I need you to taste of me. And I need you to be a part of me. Are you going to give me what I need?”
“Wha—what? I’ve vowed to protect you, and I—I promised that—”
“You spoke about your desire for me.”
“Yes, but—”
“Does that desire remain?”
“Brahanu, I want nothing greater, but we can’t do this. You’re promised to Itai, and my uncle is securing a pledge for me. No matter our desires, we can’t. I won’t allow—”
Her kiss silenced him. Pentanimir resisted only a moment before hungrily returning her affections. Brahanu’s hands glided over his body and down his abdomen. A raging torrent of sensations permeated his very being, assailing every receptor in his body.
Pushing away, he stared into her eyes, nearly going weak from their connection. “Brahanu,” he said, scooping her up into his arms and carrying her from the water. He laid her upon the fur, kissing her lips, her neck, and down her chest.
“Please soothe the ache that I feel, Pentanimir,” she breathed, feeling an eruption of pleasure that she’d never known.
After enjoying her sweetness, he raised up, immersing himself in her essence before joining his body to hers.
Depero Wood
“We must begin a new search, Hacom,” Amani said. “Two suns have passed and there’s been no sign of Brahanu. Lakaar Briac found no trace in the wood, and the patrol couldn’t find her trail. We need more men covering a great
er distance. Please, Hacom, we must find Brahanu.”
Hacom leaned back, regarding his wife, both understanding and sharing in her anguish. Brahanu’s familiarity and affinity for the wood did little to lessen her parents’ fear. Depero Wood had been Brahanu’s favorite place since childhood, and he’d always allowed her that freedom. Too much freedom, perhaps. Brahanu still visited Depero Wood almost daily, gathering herbs or just enjoying the peace and solitude that it afforded her. That knowledge was little consolation to him now. With the Nazilian patrols recently discovered in Depero Wood, and their escalating hostilities, he had to bring their daughter home.
“Amani, I share in your concern. I should’ve never permitted this, or at least insisted that Itai accompany her. I pray these storms caused her delay. Brahanu knows the wood and is capable of taking care of herself. We can’t—”
Hacom gasped as the door burst open and Itai ran into the room. “Hacom, you must come! Ared, it’s Ared.”
“Brahanu’s horse?” Amani asked. “Have you found them, Itai, have you found our daughter?”
“It’s Ared; he’s wounded.”
“Surely, he carries Brahanu. Surely, he hasn’t returned without her. Where’s my daughter?”
Amani grasped Itai’s arms, still screaming.
“Almaz!” Hacom called out, taking hold of his wife. She continued to cry, collapsing in his arms.
“Yes, Caretaker,” Almaz said.
“I need you to take Amani to our chamber and stay with her until my return. Have Nived bring her some dream wine.”
“Right away, milord,” she said, leading Amani away.
Hacom roughly rubbed his face, taking a seat near the hearth.
“Where did you find Ared, Itai?” he finally said.
“I took the path that Brahanu has shown me before. When I go with her, the route is always the same. The ground was still soddened from the rains, and I saw no trail in any direction. Once I neared the edge of the wood where the sands begin, I heard some rustling in a thicket. That’s when I saw him. His reins were twisted in some fallen branches. They were broken, Hacom, not cut, but torn by some force. Ared didn’t recognize me and wouldn’t let me near him for some time. After he finally calmed, I freed him. There were herbs and roots in his bags, but no sign of Brahanu. I need to return to the wood. I must find her and bring her home, Hacom, please. If need be, I’ll travel alone.”
“No, Itai, you won’t.”
“But Hacom,” Itai protested. “I must find her. Did you hear about the Nazilian patrols? They’re increasing their presence in Depero, and we’ve seen bands of rogues as well. You can’t—”
“Itai!” Hacom interrupted. “You’re promised to Brahanu, but I’m her father. The responsibility is mine.”
“But—”
“The responsibility is mine, but I’ll not go alone. I’ll have Nohek Glennon summon the able men in the village. Our search won’t end until Brahanu is found. Go now and prepare. We’ll need some provisions, horses, and supplies. Please, take Ared to the stable and have them ready my horse. I’ll meet with you at the temple.”
“What about the men out searching now?”
“If they find her first, so be it. I won’t sit here any longer while my daughter could be in danger.”
Itai nodded, stepping toward the door. “We’ll find her, Hacom. She’s all right.”
When the door closed, Hacom fell back in his chair. Moisture rimmed his dark, grey eyes as he glanced around the room. In every corner, he noticed items that reminded him of his daughter: her shawl draped over the stool, a wooden chest near the hearth with unfinished stitching. He smiled wistfully, thinking of her protests at being forced to learn the art. Such a willful child. More like her father than she would care to admit.
Hacom stood, forcing back his emotion. Lifting his sword belt from the table, he fastened the clasp, taking a deep breath. Hacom gripped the pommel, recalling the last time that he had cause to use it. It had been many years since he was forced to take a life. Now, he knew not what awaited him.
As he opened the door, he looked back over his home, taking in every detail as if it would be the last time he’d see it. The tolling bells from the temple pulled him from his contemplation. He rushed through the courtyard, accepting the reins from Katar, and then acknowledged the guards raising the gate.
Men young and old crowded around the village center, approaching the temple steps. When Hacom passed through the crowd, several men patted his horse’s withers and dock, offering their support. He inhaled again, giving the appearance of unflappability, though inside, he was hollow.
The Nohek Karab, Glennon, was already awaiting him when he approached.
“Hacom, Itai says that you’d like to lead another patrol to search for Brahanu. Are you planning to leave immediately?”
“Aye,” Hacom said, dismounting. “Mayhaps I’ve waited too long. I should’ve been searching from the beginning, not leaving this to the sentries alone. Itai had the right of it, and I should’ve listened.”
“You cannot change the past, Hacom. Ruminating on such things only serves to undermine the present. Your decisions weren’t made in haste or without proper thought. No one could’ve discovered much during the storm, and the rains were blinding by both sun and moon. You sent men out as soon as it cleared, and you stayed here, as you should have. Let us now do what’s necessary to bring Brahanu home. The gods are good, my friend, and protect her even now,” Glennon said, tugging the rope again. After sounding it three times, the men quieted as others approached the temple.
The remaining Nohek and Tumishi exited, standing at Hacom’s side as he addressed the forming crowd.
“My people of Cazaal, most of you know why I’ve called this gathering. Brahanu left the safety of our village in aid to Lakaar Briac. Although she enjoys the peace of the wood, she ventured there not for pleasure, but to gather supplies that we needed. In my ignorance, I permitted her to do so alone. Brahanu isn’t only my daughter; she’s a part of this village and has touched the lives of all of us in remarkable ways. She could’ve stayed in the citadel, apart from each of us. But that isn’t her heart. She cares about this village and everyone who resides here. There’s not one life here that she hasn’t touched in a loving way. Whether a kind word, a needed embrace, or a warm meal on a cold night, she’s always given of herself in aid to others. It’s time to return that kindness and show how much she means to us. Brahanu needs us now as we’ve needed her in the past. I know there are many ill that can’t assist in this search. However, I’m asking for whoever can wield a sword to come forward. This isn’t a request from the Caretaker of Cazaal. It’s a plea from a concerned father.”
A medley of voices sounded all at once as a score of young men stepped closer, offering their support.
“This will serve,” Hacom said. “We’ll divide into two groups. I’ll lead one group to the west as Itai takes the other. Travel will be only one sun, and I don’t want anyone to stray too far toward Dovak or Yarah. The Nazilians yet patrol the wood, and bands of banditti have been spotted strewn throughout. I don’t need to remind you of what dangers they present. Caretaker or no, they’ll put me to the sword as quickly as anyone else. Take care, young men. Look for any sign that the storms might’ve left us. Don’t stray alone and protect your brother’s back.”
Hacom stepped down, facing the young men. “It’s been my honor training with each of you. It’s time to prove your prowess and protect our village. You’re prepared for whatever we might encounter. Gods be good, our swords will remain sheathed, and my daughter will return with us. We know this wood. Let us use that knowledge to our advantage,” he said, and then pointed. “Julaybeim, Nuran, Ulrike, Manto, Francis, and Aschelon, you’re with me. The others follow Itai. Go to your homes and ready yourselves. We’ll meet at the mouth of the wood as the sun reaches its zenith.”
“I pray the gods’ blessings over you,” Nohek Glennon said as the crowd dispersed. Without turning, Hacom raised a
hand in acknowledgment. We’ll need the blessings of all Seven to keep her safe. We are coming, Brahanu. I’m bringing you home .
Truth and Pain
Brahanu grimaced, leaning down to pull on her slippers. It wasn’t the ache of her injuries, but the lingering discomfort of their lovemaking. Although she’d never experienced such pleasure, she hadn’t expected the ensuing discomfort. Pentanimir was a wonderful and patient lover. He ensured her gratification numerous times before attaining any of his own. She smiled, focusing more on the remembrances of him being a part of her, and desiring to have him again.
“Are you all right?” Pentanimir asked, helping her to stand.
“Well enough. I’d welcome more to have you be a part of me again.”
He kissed her hand, before helping her onto her horse. “I’ve never felt the completeness that I feel with you, Brahanu. In many ways, this was the first for me, too.”
Offering nothing more, he mounted his horse, gesturing them forward. His visage displayed an expression of love, but in his heart, he was conflicted.
Neither of them spoke as they traversed the narrow pass: their thoughts dwelled on the intimacies they shared and the implications of such desires, and confusion on how or why those desires overwhelmed them.
After clearing a ridge, and fording a small stream, they passed between two flower-covered hills. Brahanu’s brow knitted as Pentanimir paused, lifting a curtain of vines high enough for her to pass. From a distance, it gave the appearance of a solid barrier, but once she rode beneath, she noticed the worn patches of grass, revealing their path.
When they neared a small copse of trees, Pentanimir turned to regard her.
“Are you certain that you’re all right,” he asked as she drained the wineskin. “Is it your wounds?”
“I’m fine, the saddle provides no comfort. The herbs have been helping.”
“Forgive me. If I hadn’t—”
“There’s nothing to forgive, Pentanimir. I wouldn’t change one moment that we’ve shared.”
The Rise of Nazil- Complete Epic Fantasy Trilogy Page 5