She hadn’t meant to take the conversation to such a deep level. Truth was, she hadn’t ever shared that much of herself with anyone before, and it shook her up just a bit. But she couldn’t seem to stop the flow. “I’m failing. I don’t really understand how it’s happening, but I am. Mule Hollow is my last shot. I was so close to making it many, many times, but something always fell through. Now even my agent is starting to think maybe he made a mistake and I’m not as special as he thought.
“There aren’t many towns that have an award-winning columnist writing weekly columns about it. Because of Molly, and the publicity I thought I might be able to stir up if I got her on my side, I feel like this is where my dream can finally come true. I mean, what are the chances that my best friend happens to move back here and need my help at just the time that I’ve hit rock bottom? Or that when Haley called me for the job, I just happened to be drowning my sorrows in a tub of ice cream while watching Paul Newman’s Biography talking about him being discovered while performing at summer stock?” Ross didn’t smile, just nodded his head.
“Providence,” Sugar declared. “That’s what it is. And that’s why I’m here. I just need to make a splash, get some great publicity, and I can make it happen.”
“What if you do fail?”
Her heart sank at the question. This was the same old song and dance. But she wasn’t letting fear inside her head again. “I told you, it’s not an option.”
Lay it down. The phrase echoed in her thoughts and she gritted her teeth against it. Meanwhile, Ross watched her, as if weighing his words and choosing carefully what he was going to say. She knew the look and prepared herself for the usual assurance that failure wasn’t just an option, but a probability. Curtis, her eldest brother, was a lawyer, and he’d been the one to use that terminology. She didn’t like it, even though he’d said it in kindness and frustration. In love.
But love was letting someone go, too, wasn’t it? And they’d done that in the end, because she’d given them no choice.
“Success is a relative thing,” Ross said. “One man’s success is another man’s failure. No one can really judge someone else’s dreams. I believe you have to follow your own path…no matter what. It took me a while to realize that. I know a few actors and some great musicians who make a nice, stable living for themselves in Branson. They’ve managed to carve out successful careers and are famous in their own right as main attractions there. There are some that would think they’ve settled for less, that they failed because they didn’t make it in Hollywood or Nashville. What do you think about that?”
“If that’s their dream, then that’s wonderful. I don’t see anything wrong with it. But that’s not my dream. That’s not what I see—I see more. I know that sounds arrogant, maybe foolish.”
She was shaken that she’d revealed so much. Exposed so much of herself to Ross, practically a stranger.
“Who is to say your dream is foolish? Who is to say you won’t make it? I’ve only known you for a short while, and frankly, I can’t figure out why those powers that be in Hollywood haven’t grabbed you up and put you in the movies. You’re beautiful, you have an electric energy about you that I can’t imagine them not connecting with. And you have the drive of twenty people.”
Sugar’s heart was thundering in her chest like a runaway herd of longhorns. “Wow. Thanks,” she told him.
The left side of his mouth quirked. “Thought you had me all figured out, didn’t you?”
She didn’t think she would ever figure him out. “Actually, I was confused about you from the beginning,” she said, making him chuckle. But it was true. She didn’t understand him. But she suddenly knew that she would like to. This was dangerous stuff for a girl with no intentions of sticking around, no interest in forming ties to a place.
“C’mon. I had better get you back to your car so you can go to your real job.”
He took her elbow and guided her toward the truck. The feel of his hand, sure and strong against her skin, made her keenly aware of him beside her. She almost let herself wish he would walk beside her every day….
It was not a feeling she’d ever felt before. It was scary and she didn’t need it.
She needed his barn. And only his barn.
Chapter Nine
Sugar had just stepped up onto the sidewalk when Norma Sue and Adela came out of Heavenly Inspirations.
“What happened to your shoes?” Norma Sue called, heading her way.
Sugar waited for them to cross the street. She was barefoot and hoping she didn’t get a splinter traversing the rough wooden sidewalk to the office. “A beaver stole one of my flip-flops so I took the other one off.”
Adela placed a delicate hand over her heart. “A beaver stole your shoe?”
“One of Ross’s beavers stole your shoe?” Norma Sue echoed, only louder and with a grin. “Those are some moody little whittlers. What were you doing out there? Trying to talk Ross into letting you use his barn?”
“Sort of. Applegate and Stanley—and Sam, too—they thought Ross needed some help, so I went out there,” Sugar stated.
“They sent you to help Ross?” Norma Sue looked as skeptical as she sounded. She was a rancher herself, which was more than apparent from her clothes. Though she’d worn a dress on Sunday, Sugar hadn’t seen her in anything other than denim the rest of the time. Usually she wore overalls and boots.
Sugar smiled at her. “They were really just trying to give me an excuse to talk him into letting me use his barn.”
Adela smiled. “And did it work? Did he relent and agree?”
“I didn’t ask him.”
Norma Sue shook her head. “What were you thinkin’, girl?”
“That’s just it—I wasn’t thinking.” She laughed and filled them in on the details about the beaver: how Ross had rushed in like a hero and scooped her up, then scared the ninja beaver away. “After he was so gallant, I just couldn’t harass him. Besides, like Adela said the other night, God’s going to work this out for me. Although I have to tell you ladies, I am getting impatient.”
Adela patted her arm. “You have the right attitude. Don’t you worry, that boy is going to come around. We’re going to pray some sense into him.”
“Or badger it into him,” Norma Sue added with a wide grin. “You just wait till I tell Esther Mae. She’s out at No Place Like Home—you know, the women’s shelter—babysitting right now, but she’s going to enjoy your beaver adventure. And don’t you worry, that boy is gonna come to his senses. Just you wait and see.”
Sugar hoped they were right. She said goodbye, then hurried upstairs for a new pair of shoes. That cranky ole beaver had stolen her favorite flip-flop. The meanie. She got tickled again thinking about it and as she entered the office a few minutes later, it was still playing in her head. It would actually make a funny scene in a play.
Speaking of plays, she sat down and turned on her computer. She had real-estate business to take care of; updating the weekly ads for the area papers was her main priority today. But then she could read the plays her agent had e-mailed her.
She had to find something and soon. She’d been in Mule Hollow for a week now and had accomplished zero. She had to find the right play, so when Ross came through for her as she was praying he would, she would be ready.
The beaver scene popped into her head off and on all day. And when she started reading plays that afternoon, the silly beaver scene wouldn’t let her concentrate.
By about eight that evening, she was really frustrated. It wasn’t just the stupid beaver encounter that was distracting her. Now she had a whole bunch of thoughts churning around inside her head, begging her to write them down. Giving up on her reading, she headed upstairs. This was ridiculous. She was an actress, not a writer. It had never even crossed her mind before. But now that it had, maybe she’d give it a shot. At this point, she’d give anything a chance if it might lead to success.
On Sunday morning, Sugar’s heart about jumped out of her ch
est when she saw Ross step into the hallway of the Sunday school wing. He hadn’t attended the first hour the week before, so she hadn’t expected him now. But she was glad to see him there. All week, she’d hoped he would call with the news that he’d had a change of heart. He hadn’t. Of course, she knew that, like many of the ranchers, he was trying to get hay up before the rain fell yesterday. But still she’d wanted him to call.
Today, she was tired. She’d thrown herself into finding the perfect script, but nothing seemed right. Also, she was still distracted by the ideas in her head, and was attempting to write them down. They hadn’t totally come together, and were more than a little intimidating…but at least they had shown her what type of production piece she wanted. That alone was a much-needed boost.
The sight of Ross walking toward her wiped away her bad mood. Her heart skipped inside her ribs and she knew she was grinning like a fool.
“Hello, stranger,” she called, feeling promise in the air. “So how are our beavers?”
“Busy as usual. But I think they are starting to move downstream. I got the majority of trees covered up, and installed a device that changes the water flow, so things are looking up.”
Sugar was about to ask him if he’d found her flip-flop when they moved, but she didn’t get the chance before Esther Mae and Norma Sue spotted them and charged down the hallway.
Esther Mae swooped her into a hug, her outrageous hat making Sugar sneeze when the purple feathers tickled her nose.
“Ross Denton, shame on you,” she said as she stepped away, giving Sugar room to breathe while she glared at Ross. “This girl could have lost a toe out there getting attacked by a beaver on your property. And all because you are being so stubborn.”
Sugar was so startled by the outburst that she laughed. Ross, however, looked as if he might try to make a run for it. Norma Sue stepped sideways, effectively cutting off his escape route.
“All this nonsense needs to stop,” she snapped, giving him a stern look of disapproval. “You need to let her use your barn and you need to do it now! Around here, we help each other. This poor girl almost lost a limb coming out there to help you fix your beaver problem. Now you need to reciprocate.”
Norma Sue was peeved! She was positively fuming.
And Esther Mae, too. “That’s right,” she stated, nodding so hard her feathers shook. She pointed at Sugar. “Just you look at this beautiful girl. She wants to bring a smile to everyone’s lives with a little entertainment, and you are making her work unnecessarily hard. Don’t you want to see her sing and act for us? You are depriving all of us of a good thing, Ross Denton.”
Sugar had to bite her lips to keep the smile inside. Ross, however, wasn’t pleased. Exasperated—oh, yeah.
“Ladies, I think this is between Sugar and me.”
Not a good thing to say. Norma Sue’s eyes narrowed and she stepped up to him. He was well over six feet of lean, hard muscle, and Norma Sue was half his height and three times as round. When she poked her finger in his chest, she had to crane her neck to meet his startled eyes. “You are not funny, mister. That barn is sitting out there wasting away when she—” her thumb jerked Sugar’s way “—wants to put it to good use.”
By this time, the hall was filling up with people. Some scooted around their group. Some, mostly cowboys, watched Ross’s predicament with interest, clearly finding it entertaining.
Ross was not so amused—he was really cute, looking all dark and a bit woebegone, Sugar decided.
“Now listen, Norma Sue, I’m not discussing this here. It’s my barn. She can do her thing at the community center and then head back to Hollywood where she belongs.”
Well, that sounded brutal. So much for making any forward progress with him! Sugar met his unflinching eyes and lifted one eyebrow, a feat that had taken her a long time to learn. For the sake of her art and the camera, in scenes that would call for an expression of disapproval, she’d spent hours in front of the mirror, practicing. She was very glad of that time spent now and knew exactly what he was seeing.
He didn’t appear intimidated at all. On the contrary, he shook his head, excused himself, and instead of sidestepping Norma Sue, spun and stalked back down the hall and out the door.
That bothered Sugar, but Norma Sue looked at her with a sly smile of satisfaction. “There. That should do it,” she said, and then she and an equally pleased Esther Mae hustled away.
Poor Ross was being bamboozled!
Sugar had seriously underestimated these deceptively innocent-looking ladies.
Boy, it was nice to have them in her corner. Better with her than against her. Poor Ross.
So the women thought they could manipulate him!
Ross stormed out onto the church lawn, still fuming. Most everyone was inside, settling into their classrooms, and he was thankful there was no one else to harass him as he stalked down the sidewalk toward the parking lot. He’d just turned the corner of the church when he almost mowed over Pastor Allen.
“Ross,” he said. “Is something wrong?”
“Yes, sir, there is,” Ross said honestly. “Pardon me, but today just isn’t a day I need to be in the sanctuary.” He started to move on, but the preacher put a detaining hand on his arm.
“I’d say by the sound of it that today is indeed the very day you need to be in church. How about you and I go into my office right now and talk about this? I’ve got forty minutes to fill before the service starts, and it looks to me like the good Lord just gave me an appointment.” He smiled, and his eyes shone bright with encouragement.
Ross had always respected the dedicated preacher. When he’d taken on the job a few years back, he’d already retired to a piece of land about fifty miles north of town. But because Mule Hollow needed a preacher and couldn’t keep one for any length of time, he would come out and preach whenever he was needed. Eventually, the church stopped trying to find a pastor and asked him to take the job full-time. He’d done so, while continuing to commute. His wife was in poor health and needed to be closer to her doctors. Ross had much respect for Pastor Allen for giving up part of his retirement for their community, when he obviously had plenty on his hands already.
But Ross had never really spent much time in the pastor’s office, not being one to run to the preacher with his problems. He figured the man had enough on his plate. Today, however, Ross needed to talk to someone. “I’d appreciate that,” he said, and followed Pastor Allen around the side of the annex to the private entrance to the offices.
Feeling awkward, he dropped into one of the chairs facing the desk as the robust preacher hurried around and took his seat. “So tell me, does this have to do with the nice young lady who wants to use your barn for a show?”
Ross laughed, taken by surprise. “Yes, sir. That’s exactly what’s wrong. I might help if I thought she was going to stick around, but she isn’t. And I can’t get anyone to see that. It’s not like I don’t feel for her, because I do. I mean, she irritates me, don’t get me wrong. The woman gets under my skin and makes me feel plum crazy.” He stopped abruptly, suddenly remembering he was talking to the preacher, who wouldn’t want to hear about how Ross couldn’t stop thinking of Sugar. But Pastor Allen cupped his hands together on his desk and smiled.
“Go on,” he urged. “It sounds to me like you need to get this off your chest.”
Boy, was that an understatement. “Fact of the matter is, I don’t want to be involved in the entertainment business again, either. I don’t want anything stealing my energy away from my ranch. Maybe that’s selfish, but it’s the way I feel.” He didn’t add that Sugar scared him with the way she made him think about doing just that.
“But even so, it makes you feel guilty.”
“How did you guess?”
“You wouldn’t be this upset if you didn’t care. And because you care, you feel guilty.”
Ross nodded. “I gave that life up. I didn’t plan on it trying to follow me here. It isn’t easy for me to say no when I fe
el empathy for her. She really does believe that this is part of God’s plan for her life. It puts me in a very bad position, because I know how to help her. I just don’t want to center my life around a show again. That’s not my dream.”
The pastor propped his fingers together and rested his chin against them as he thought. After a moment, he dropped his hands and met Ross’s gaze with frank eyes. “I think you should look at it from a different angle. Do you have a desire for the Lord to use you?”
“Yes.”
“You say that, but let me ask you this. Do you want the Lord to use you as He sees fit or as you see fit?”
That stung, and Ross didn’t like it. He’d had his life planned out. He was going to ranch, marry a great woman and raise some kids. God could use him for that.
“I can’t say what you should do,” the pastor continued, “but I’d like to pray with you, and then I suggest you spend some time thinking about this with an open mind. You never know what blessings the Lord has waiting for you if you’re willing to answer His call. But even more important than that, you never know who you are going to be a blessing to by putting their needs before your own.”
Ross felt ashamed, especially with this coming from a man who’d blessed an entire community by giving up part of his retirement to minister to them on Sundays. He looked up at the ceiling and let out a long sigh of frustration. Could he do this? God was throwing him a curveball that he hadn’t expected….
“You know, I can tell you this,” Pastor Allen said. “I believe God gave you a talent. What if those twenty years performing in Branson were really just your preparation for His true purpose in giving you that gift?”
The Cowboy Takes a Bride Page 8