But she wanted so much more than that…
Then it was about time she got used to the fact she wasn’t going to get it.
It seemed only moments later that Razi brought the Jeep to a halt outside a gleaming white building. Life seemed that way because it took on a frenetic pace with Razi in it, Lucy concluded as a nurse in a starched uniform escorted them to the appropriate department. It was a relief to hear they were to be seen immediately—and less of a relief when there was no offer from Razi to wait outside the room where the scan would take place. By the time she had changed into a robe he had taken a seat in front of the screen. She climbed up on the examination couch and risked a faint smile as the radiographer squeezed cold jelly on her stomach and started the hunt for their tiny child.
‘Well, I can tell you you’re definitely pregnant.’
Lucy gasped with shock and excitement as a hectic heartbeat broke the anxious silence. Razi remained absolutely still and utterly intent.
‘And expecting a healthy baby,’ the radiographer confirmed to everyone’s relief.
As the tense mood in the small room relaxed, Lucy thought the amplified heartbeat was the most wonderful sound she had ever heard. It was certainly the most thrilling and the most life-changing. ‘I can’t believe it,’ she whispered, wondering if it was possible to explode with joy. ‘I can’t believe my little girl is growing safe inside me—she is safe, isn’t she?’ she anxiously confirmed. ‘There’s nothing wrong, is there?’ The hair was standing up on the back of her neck. The radiographer had gone very quiet. She looked at Razi for reassurance as the radiographer continued his investigations.
‘Just a minute, please,’ the radiographer requested, focusing all of his attention on the screen. ‘Can you hear that?’
Lucy strained her ears, and only then realised she was squeezing the life out of Razi’s hand. ‘What is it? Tell me?’
‘You’re not expecting one baby,’ the radiographer announced in triumph. ‘You’re expecting twins.’
‘What?’ Lucy’s mind blanked with shock. Then elation, disbelief, and Wow! No way! took its place, followed swiftly by acute alarm as she raced through some terrifying financial calculations in her head.
‘Are you sure?’ Razi demanded tensely.
‘Absolutely sure,’ the radiographer assured him.
‘Here…you can see for yourself.’ He pointed out first one tiny little child and then the other.
Razi exclaimed in Sinnebalese. He couldn’t believe it. Everything suddenly seemed more real to him. He could safely say he was ecstatic. Having heard the babies’ heartbeats on the monitor, suddenly he could picture them being a family.
Razi felt a swell of pride within him and he knew then that he had to protect Lucy. He never wanted the twins or their mother to feel ashamed of who they were.
‘Lucy?’ Razi prompted.
She was terrified. Totally overwhelmed. All her hardwon self-belief had just taken a serious knock. She had planned to raise her baby under her own strength even if that meant doing so here in Isla de Sinnebar, but now…How could she work or support herself and her babies? Where was her security? She would be at Razi’s mercy.
‘Twins usually come early,’ the radiographer was continuing, ‘so you won’t have so long to wait before you’re holding them in your arms.’
She knew the man meant to be kind. She knew he was trying to reassure her, but the timescale she had been working on to support one baby had just flown out of the window.
‘Aren’t you pleased?’ Razi demanded, touching her arm to reclaim her attention.
‘I’m overwhelmed,’ she said honestly.
Her mind was racing, leaving her numb from an overload of excitement, emotion, love, as well as the sense of responsibility coming her way, and most of all her fear of failure. She could be stand-up, determined and as independent-minded as she liked, but she wanted to have her independence and know that whatever happened with Razi, she could support her children. She had to try and build a stake before they were born, and then—
She found herself grabbing the arm of the radiographer and asking him to double-check.
‘There is no doubt,’ he said.
‘Sorry,’ she said, self-consciously letting go of his sleeve. ‘It’s just that I can’t believe it.’
‘Neither can I.’ Razi felt a rush of jubilation speed through him. He gave her a kiss, while she, still in shock, remained stiffly unresponsive.
‘I often see this reaction,’ the radiographer informed them. ‘Fathers are generally the ones on a high, while mothers count the cost in terms of coping and expense. But of course, in your case, that won’t be a problem.’
Oh, wouldn’t it? thought Lucy as the man bowed low to Razi. Why should she be any different from any other woman—especially when she had no intention of putting herself in Razi’s debt? Her little family had got bigger and she couldn’t support them on her own. Her fate was even more firmly in Razi’s hands.
‘So glad to be of service to you, Your Majesty,’ the radiographer was adding. ‘If there’s anything else I can do for you—anything at all—please, just let me know.’
Helping Lucy down from the couch, Razi smiled the heart-stopping smile that under other circumstances would have filled her with love and confidence, but right now filled her with something much closer to apprehension.
Chapter Sixteen
OUTSIDE the hospital, Razi escorted Lucy to the Jeep, keeping a firm hold on her hand and on her shoulder.
‘I’m taking you straight back to the palace,’ he said, gunning the engine and roaring away. ‘We’ll have a brief chat there—’ He held up one strong, tanned hand to silence her as his call connected. A few ecstatic phrases later he cut the line. Lucy didn’t need to be fluent in Sinnebalese to get the gist. ‘Aren’t they shocked?’ she asked as he stowed the phone.
‘Shocked? Their ruling Sheikh is producing children two at a time? I should hope they’re rejoicing. We’re well on our way to founding a dynasty.
‘Joke?’ he said dryly when Lucy looked at him with concern. ‘Let the world believe what it will.’ He turned serious. ‘The main thing for me is my children’s health and happiness. Am I supposed to hide the fact that I’m delighted by the imminent arrival of twins?’
‘No, of course not,’ Lucy agreed faintly, except she didn’t appear to be included in his plans. A new fire was burning in Razi’s eyes. Since he’d discovered he was to be a father of two children his protective instincts were firing on all cylinders—and God help anyone who got in his way, including Lucy Tennant.
She couldn’t have been more surprised or delighted at the immediacy with which Razi had acknowledged their babies, but on the reverse side of that coin was the fact that Razi was a king and leader of a country, and while acknowledging their children was more than she had expected it meant living life on his terms, which in turn meant yielding her freedom, especially as she was not expecting twins. And if that wasn’t right for her, how could it be right for her babies?
‘This is the late sheikh’s palace,’ Razi explained, slowing the Jeep in front of some towering golden gates. ‘Until my new eco-palace is ready for occupation I’m afraid both I and my guest will have to put up with some unrestrained splendour.’
It was hard if not impossible to remain immune to Razi’s upbeat mood. ‘I’ll do my best,’ Lucy responded. But the joke was quickly over. They still had discussions ahead of them and the black-robed attendants with curving scimitars glinting at their sides didn’t exactly reassure her.
‘Welcome to the Palace of Bling unbridled,’ Razi commented dryly as they passed beneath a golden arch. He drove on down a broad avenue that glittered as if it had been sprinkled with gold dust.
For all she knew, it had, Lucy realised, feeling another jolt to her confidence.
‘Quartz crystals in the mix make the surface sparkle,’ Razi explained.
There were glorious banks of flowers either side of this glittering highway,
but what really claimed her attention was the massive structure rising in front of them like something out of the Arabian Nights. There were pink towers and white minarets standing like bookends either side of jewelled cupolas of beaten gold. If she’d been a tourist she would have been overwhelmed—she was still overwhelmed, but the last of her courage had just drained away and everything began to swim before her eyes. She felt faint and sick, knowing she didn’t belong, that she could never belong and that the discussions ahead of her could only be disastrous.
‘Modest, hmm?’ Razi murmured dryly. ‘But I call it home.
‘Lucy?’
Grabbing hold of her, Razi pulled into the side. ‘Drink,’ he insisted passing her some water and turning the airconditioning on full.
‘Sorry, I just felt—’
‘You don’t have to apologise,’ he insisted, still with his arm around her. ‘I understand this must be overwhelming for you.’ He waited until she had drunk the water and then pointed out of the window. ‘I’m going to open it to the public. What do you think?’
Of walls studded with sparkling jewels—or formidable battlements decorated with pennants bearing his royal insignia? ‘It’s too much to take in,’ she admitted, breathing a sigh of wonder.
‘I’m going to use this palace to showcase our heritage. There will be a museum, as well as an art gallery—and we’ll hold concerts,’ he added with a grin that carved a place in her heart. ‘You’ll like that,’ he teased. ‘Karaoke?’ he reminded her.
She bit back tears and smiled as if everything were wonderful, but Razi made her want so much—too much.
‘Feeling better?’ he confirmed. ‘Ready to go on now?’
She nodded her head and sat up, tilting her chin to show her determination. She would have to get used to these bouts of weakness as well as the pangs of longing, Lucy concluded as Razi drove them the last hundred yards.
He parked up in front of a wide sweep of marble steps and then came round to help her out before the attendants even had chance to reach her door. He lifted her down and steadied her on her feet in front of him. ‘Don’t look so worried,’ he murmured, touching her face, seemingly oblivious to the phalanx of soldiers lining up as a guard of honour. ‘You’ve had quite a day.’
‘And so have you,’ she pointed out, starting to feel queasy again.
‘Let me get you in the shade,’ he said, ushering her forward.
Razi guided her down vaulted corridors packed with treasures. She couldn’t even begin to take in such a wealth of gold and jewels and fabulous art. It would take a lifetime of visits, Lucy concluded. They came to a halt in front of an intricately decorated golden door. ‘The harem,’ Razi explained, holding the door for her. ‘No, really,’ he insisted when she looked at him in surprise. ‘Though these days you’re the only occupant—maybe I should do something about that…’ His lips quirked. ‘Triplets next time?’
There wouldn’t be a next time. She understood he was only being kind. They’d discuss practicalities and then she’d go home. She didn’t belong here. But at least it was cooler in the splendid golden room, though her cheeks quickly heated up when she noticed the erotic murals on the walls: beautiful women with sloe eyes and full, ruby lips, and handsome men with brooding faces. How could Razi settle for her? Not that he would. That had never been on the cards.
He led the way across a magnificent marble floor and through an archway that led into an inner courtyard where cooling breezes and a shimmering fountain added to the relaxing ambience. He suggested she sit on a gilded bench beneath the shade of a glorious jacaranda tree frosted with frowsy pink blossom. She didn’t need much persuading. The fat velvet cushions looked so inviting. But when she sat down and Razi joined her he took her hands in the type of grip a person used when they were about to tell you something you really didn’t want to hear. ‘Why do I think this is going to be bad?’
‘At a guess? You’ve just had the most stunning news of your life, and your emotions are all over the place?’
But by keeping hold of her Razi wasn’t helping her concerns. The fine stone fretwork blurred as she stared straight ahead, not wanting to hear anything he had to say. But she couldn’t silence him.
‘I want you to know everything, so you’re protected from cruel gossip and innuendo. There was a marriage contract—Let me finish,’ he insisted when she jerked away from him.
‘It was nothing—’
‘Nothing?’ This was everything she’d feared. Her children would never know their father. What woman would want her husband’s bastard children flaunted under her nose? At best they’d be hidden away in a remote part of the country. She couldn’t stand the thought of it. She wanted to raise her children where they’d be free. ‘I always knew there’d be someone,’ she exclaimed, imagining a face similar to those beautiful young women she had seen depicted on the walls.
‘There’s no one, I promise you.’ Razi took hold of her arms, bringing her in front of him. ‘There’s no one but you, the mother of my children.’
‘But we can’t always have what we want,’ Lucy anticipated with eyes wide and wounded.
He didn’t want to be so brutally frank with her, but while his council had applauded the forthcoming proof of his fruitfulness a foreign bride would rock the country to its very foundation—even a foreign mistress flaunted in front of the traditionalists would be a step too far. The cold truth was, he would acknowledge their children and afford them full rights and privileges, but Lucy had to go. He couldn’t have Lucy and the throne so he had no option but to send her away. His life was pledged to a country—and Lucy was right. He couldn’t have what he wanted any more than she could.
‘You don’t have to explain anything,’ she said.
‘Yes, I do,’ he argued, touching her cheek so she had nowhere to look but in his eyes. ‘And for once, you have to listen.’ His duty was to defend a kingdom, to help it grow and to provide heirs, but he would do everything he could to protect Lucy from further hurt. It would take more than a few days to build her confidence in him until it could never be shaken and words wouldn’t do it; he had to prove himself.
‘I can’t stand by and watch you with someone else, Razi. I won’t.’ She was growing ever more heated. ‘Not when I know that no one can ever love you as I do.’
‘You love me?’ He was brought up short by this admission.
‘You must know I love you,’ she told him, frowning.
‘How would I know that?’
Razi was right. She had never been brave enough to tell him that she loved him. And after everything he had confided in her she had never once told him that it could be different, that a woman could love him and that his loveless childhood was not the norm. She had been too wrapped up in the fact that a desert king with more power and wealth than she could imagine would never take up with a cook, and had never once considered that what Razi needed most was love, and that love was the one thing she could give him. She had thought him aloof, but when had she risked her feelings? She would walk through fire for him, but when had she told him that?
A cold hand gripped Lucy’s throat at the thought that she had never told her parents how much she loved them either. But it was no use burying her face in her hands. She had to do something about it. She had Razi to thank for building her confidence to the point where she’d caught a glimpse of what she could be, and only herself to blame for losing her grip on that image. She was about to become a mother and that had changed her. She was a woman who was deeply in love with one man—a woman who mustn’t allow the old insecurities to master her a second longer. ‘Yes, I love you,’ she said defiantly. ‘Make what you will of that.’
He smiled inwardly at this return of the battler and he knew Lucy’s words came straight from her wounded heart. He wouldn’t hold her to them. He had never looked for love, let alone expected to find it. He had never guessed that Lucy felt anything more for him than passion and fascination for someone who came from a very different culture, a very
different world. She had always seemed so businesslike out of bed—all this talk of restaurants and shares in a business. However he felt about her was irrelevant. He’d learned to smother feelings like those years back.
He told her everything about the supposed marriage contract with his cousin and how it could never have been, and that it was a cheap trick dreamed up by Leila’s father. ‘He couldn’t have known that as far as my own father was concerned I didn’t exist. I never even met him,’ he explained to an incredulous Lucy. ‘My father, the ruling Sheikh of Isla de Sinnebar, never once acknowledged me during his lifetime as his son.’
‘Oh, Razi—’
He shook off her tender concern. ‘That’s why I’m so proud to acknowledge my children—and why I’ll always be there for them—’ He stopped, seeing the fear in her eyes. This was about reassuring Lucy, not about him. ‘As my father never mentioned me, why would he arrange a marriage for me? I knew at once that the document Leila’s father presented was a forgery, but I had it scrutinised by experts, just to be sure. And now it’s all been put to bed.’
‘With a large pay-off?’ she interrupted, still fearing the worst.
He could see where this was going. ‘Lucy, this is nothing like your situation.’
She pulled her hands out of his grasp.
‘Things are going to be very different for you,’ he stressed. ‘I only wish there was time now for me to lay out all the plans I’ve made for you.’
‘You’ve made plans for me?’ she said softly.
He glanced around. ‘Can’t you see one of your wonderful restaurants here in this courtyard once I open this palace to the public? A café in the courtyard—and perhaps another restaurant for gourmet eating in the gardens?’
Ruling Sheikh, Unruly Mistress Page 13