by Amber Heart
“Well, Blaze is head over heels for Eric, and she must have been sitting their when he grabbed your book and brought it up.” That dumbfounded Rosalie. Blue eyes had a name. It was Eric. And he’d taken time away from his friends just to bring her back a book? Did that mean something? Rosalie was the last person to know anything about dating or romance or courtship, and she would admit that freely. Maybe Vanessa could be an insight into the boy. Mentally pumping the brakes, Rosalie chided herself for even starting to think that way. No. She wouldn’t try to get closer to Eric. It wasn’t worth it. She had school to focus on, and he was just that arrogant punk that wasn’t her type anyway. Not that she really had a type, because she’d never dated, but if she did, he wouldn’t be it. She pushed him out of her mind and focused on something else.
“So, is her name really Blaze?” This earned her another laugh from Vanessa.
“No, it’s actually Stacey, but she didn’t think that would work in our group. It was too…innocent. So she dyed her hair and changed her name. It helped her change her image. Kind of what we’re doing with you, but without the color. Oh yeah, come look at your cut!” Vanessa had a full length mirror in her room, and she grabbed Rosalie’s hand, pulling her in front of it. Rosalie was dumbstruck. Whatever Blaze had done to her hair was beautiful. Before it was all one length, flat, almost lifeless. Now, she had bangs that framed her face, her hair was in layers, and she had a side part that would let her flip her hair in or out of her face whenever she wanted. It gave her a boost of confidence that she’d never felt before.
“Wow! She did an amazing job! I love it! I’d like to tell her that, but I don’t think that would be too smart.” Vanessa shook her head, validating that idea right away. “To be honest, with the look she’d given me, I thought she was going to sheer me like a sheep.”
“No, she’s not like that. She’ll get back at you some other way, if she wants to get even, but it’ll be subtle, and only something you’ll know. Almost like blackmail rather than blatant sabotage. I’ve known her for a couple of years, so I can promise you that much. Are you ready to go shopping?” Vanessa’s bubbly personality spilled over and infected Rosalie.
“Sure. Don’t get mad at me if we don’t find anything to make me look like less of a mouse, though. My mom used to tell me that I could only be what I was, and I’m a mouse.” Vanessa rolled her eyes.
“Your mom never met me. Let’s go! I’m driving.” Rosalie patted her hair a couple more times, loving the way it felt when it slipped through her fingers. She smiled at her reflection, thinking that maybe, just maybe, things were looking up. She went and grabbed her purse, following Vanessa out of the room and down to the parking lot. Vanessa’s car was a blue sedan, not the newest, but not exactly a clunker, either. Gallantly, Vanessa opened the passenger door and bowed her into the seat. Rosalie was doubled over with laughter as Vanessa scooted into the driver’s seat. The girls were singing at the top of their lungs to the cheesiest hits on the radio, laughing and having a good time. Vanessa pulled up in front of a shop that Rosalie had never seen before. Grabbing her purse, Rosalie followed Vanessa in. The shop was dark, and there was some heavy metal blaring from the speakers. Rosalie expected to see ripped leather clothes with safety pins as decorations everywhere, but it really wasn’t all bad.
“Hey, Marissa. I brought a friend with me, and we need a makeover. Can you hook us up with a dressing room?” Vanessa was talking to a girl behind the counter with at least a dozen piercings in her face. It made Rosalie a little squeamish, but she soldiered on, following both girls to the row of dressing rooms against the back wall. Marissa unlocked one, then Vanessa shoved her in, closing the door behind her. “Ok, get naked! I’m gonna go grab some things for you to try on. We’re going to find the new Rosalie!”
Chapter 4
Rosalie was down to her bra and panties in the dressing room, with Vanessa handing her things over the door. She was embarrassed that she had someone with her when she was clothes shopping, because she’d never had anyone besides her mother with her until now. Some of the outfit choices Rosalie couldn’t even bring herself to try on. She just picked them up between a thumb and a forefinger and moved them over to the discard pile that was rapidly growing on the chair. Some of those skirts barely covered her butt, and there was no way that she could walk around with her cheeks hanging out under her hemline. Maybe a change in wardrobe could help her, but this was not the way to go.
“Um, Vanessa? Can we get something a little more…” She broke off, not quite knowing how to phrase it. “Just with more material?” There was a silence on the other side of the door, and Rosalie winced. Had she already pushed her new friend away?
“Yeah, you got it. Hang on.” Vanessa’s voice sounded more than a little disappointed, and it made Rosalie want to leave. A bundle of clothes came over the top of the door again, and she sighed. Hopefully this batch had something in it that she would actually wear. A black leather skirt caught her attention instantly. Judging by the other skirts Vanessa had offered her, this one was actually of a decent length. Excited for the first time since they got into the store, she put it on. It went to mid-thigh, and she could actually pull it to almost her knees. She smiled. There. A compromise. Now for a shirt. A turquoise blob caught her attention, and she picked it up. It was a halter top, but it didn’t have too much cut out of it, just bare shoulders. Feeling better about her choices, she walked out of the dressing room with a confidence that she hadn’t felt before. Vanessa’s eyes lit up and she grinned, happily clapping her hands.
“That’s perfect! Wow! What a total transformation! I love it!” The praise made Rosalie blush, and she looked down at herself.
“I wouldn’t say it was perfect. She looks like a prostitute who hasn’t been out in the sun very often.” Rosalie’s head snapped up in anger. It was Eric. Mr. Blue Eyes himself. What the hell was he doing here? It was bad enough that Rosalie was showing off these new clothes in front of someone she hardly knew, but him? Rosalie ran back into the dressing room, almost slamming the door behind her. Her cheeks were red and burning with embarrassment. She heard a thud, and could only assume that Vanessa had punched him in the shoulder.
“What is wrong with you? She looked cute!” Rosalie maneuvered herself so she could peek out through the crack between the door and the wall. She had to balance precariously over the chair and massive pile of discards, doing her best not to press her face against the door so it wouldn’t make a noise and move. Eric rolled his eyes at her and shrugged off the blow.
“You can’t dress up a mouse and expect it to be anything more than a mouse. Sorry, that’s the truth.” His attitude was cold and nonchalant. Rosalie’s cheeks were still pink, but it was no longer with embarrassment, now it was with anger. How dare he put her down when he was friends with girls who wore less! She was just trying to find a happy medium between mouse and whore. That decided it right then and there. She was going to buy this outfit, and she was going to rock it. Maybe she was a little on the pale side, but she could start studying outside and fix that. Rosalie froze. Was she really going to take advice from this insensitive asshole? She leaned back, intending to change out of the outfit, but she slipped on the pile of clothes and accidentally pushed the door open. Vanessa and Eric froze, staring at her. Rosalie couldn’t do anything but stare back. Eric shrugged and turned on his heel, leaving the store. Vanessa watched him go with a scowl on his face.
“What was he doing here anyway?” hissed Rosalie once he was out of the store. Vanessa tossed her head haughtily.
“Probably here to tell me something else that my ex wanted me to know.” Rob was still trying to get at her, apparently, and she was holding her own ignoring him. Maybe he’d turned to his lieutenant to get the message across. A smile manifested on Rosalie’s face. Well, if that was the case, then he’d failed. He hadn’t said a word about Rob the whole time he was in the store. Was it maybe because of how she looked in that outfit? Or had he maybe been so di
sgusted that he couldn’t get the words out? Damn! Clothes shopping was an emotional roller coaster. Rosalie colored at the thought of him paying enough attention to her to forget what he was supposed to be doing. Then she got mad at herself. Why would he pay attention to her at all? She was invisible. In a haze, she paid for the skirt and top, mechanically making the rights sounds and movements to make it look like she was paying attention to Vanessa’s conversation. In reality, she was repeating a mantra over and over again in her head. Tomorrow school started. Her premed classes wouldn’t take her anywhere near Eric or Blaze or Rob, or any of that bunch. It was a hope that she held on to, and she started to count down the hours until her day was over. As the girls made it back to their dorm, they found Rob blocking their way. Vanessa froze, glowering at him, expecting him to move. The two of them stood in complete silence, staring at each other. Rosalie took that as her cue and slipped around him to get into the building. She almost felt bad about leaving Vanessa out there with him, but she was sure the other girl could handle it. Besides, she was still reeling herself, and just wanted to be alone.
In her room, Rosalie hung the outfit up in her closet. She stared at it for a few minutes then yanked it off the bar and flung it across the room. She frowned at the pile of blue and black in the corner of the room. It felt like it was alive and had eyes to watch her accusingly with. Stalking across the room, she picked it up and hung it back in the closet…as far back as she could reach. There. It wasn’t anywhere that she could see. She still hadn’t decided if it had been a nice purchase, or if it had just been an impulse buy. She walked over to her desk and looked at the stack of textbooks. What better way to destress than to pack her bag for tomorrow? Yes, it was a bit on the geeky side, but it made her feel better. She grabbed her backpack and perused it for a moment. It was one of those heavy duty ones that high school kids used because they usually got slung all over the place. She pulled out her schedule and started to comb through it, separating the books by day. When she had everything she needed for tomorrow, she packed them in her bag, threw in a handful of pens and pencils, a stack of notebooks, and a calculator. She didn’t have a laptop, she was still saving up for that, but she was proud of being able to pay for her things herself, so the more things she could get for school, the more self-sufficient she saw herself as. For now it was the old fashioned, pen and paper way.
The tiny window gave her a nice view out onto the quad behind their dorm. She went over to it in order to catch the last few rays of the sun as they played across the grass. Her eye caught Vanessa and Rob, locked in a heated embrace, and she turned away embarrassed. She was embarrassed that she would never have the courage to have such a blatant public display of affection. Then she realized, you actually had to have someone first. That was the first hurdle, and she didn’t believe she would get there. Standing in front of the mirror, she gave herself a once over. She wasn’t completely unfortunate looking. The new hair cut framed her face and made it look fuller, almost pretty. The makeup gave her face a soft glow, and to her, she looked more alive than she had in years. Her eye caught the reflection of the closet, and she wondered what she would really look like in the style of clothes that Vanessa and her friends seemed to like. It would certainly catch Eric’s attention if she dressed that way, and she’d even feel a little like Sandy at the end of Grease. But was she really willing to lose herself in order to catch a guy? No. She couldn’t justify it. Maybe that would be something she’d put on her bucket list. A boyfriend. Why did that little thing seem to be so far out of her reach? Sighing, she grabbed her robe from the hook on the back of her door and grabbed her bathroom bag. Might as well wash all her worries away in the shower.
As the hot water rushed over her, Rosalie let her tears mix in. This was supposed to be a new beginning for her, and so far it just seemed like she was royally mucking it all up. It felt good to just let it out. No one was here to hear her, and she could let the weight slide off her shoulders. Toweling herself off, she put her robe on and headed back to her room. Vanessa still wasn’t back from whatever she was doing with Rob, so that left Rosalie alone with her thoughts. Changing into her pajamas, she crawled into bed and stared out of the window. She wasn’t really the praying type, but she closed her eyes for a minute and sent up a silent prayer that tomorrow went smoothly. The moon shone through the window, bathing her in a soft glow. It made Rosalie feel like a fairy princess, being kissed by the moonbeams. When she’d been younger, she’d hoped that there had been a mistake somewhere along the heritage line and she’d wake up one morning with wings and be beautiful. It was the product of an overactive imagination, and that had gotten her more than her fair share of teasing growing up. A few people had even suggested that she write down her crazy fantasies and publish them as fiction books. That thought made her blush, and it was with that thought that she finally fell asleep.
It was quite a while later that Vanessa came back up the stairs to her room. Rob was on her heels, and the two were knocking into almost everything as they made their way to her room. A particularly energetic kiss knocked into the bookshelf that Rosalie had built and set up next to her reading chair. The crash brought Rosalie into a state of semi-awareness. Sitting up with her heart racing, she jumped out of bed and rushed to the door of her room. She opened it and saw the two in a state of undress.
“Oh my goodness!” Rosalie quickly slammed the door shut again, locking it behind her. She crawled back under the covers and cried herself to sleep, feeling more alone than she had even in high school where the other girls made sure to point out her faults and let her know that she would never amount to anything. Did that mean that they were right?
Chapter 5
Monday morning dawned bright and early, and excitement ran through Rosalie. It was the first day of a new chapter of her life. All the bad things that she’d worried about over the weekend were now gone, disintegrated. It was time to start her premed program, and the sense of accomplishment from that alone would be enough to erase the memories of a certain blue eyed individual that peeked out at her from the shadows of her thoughts. She quickly and firmly pushed that thought from her mind, shouldered her bag, and grabbed the key to her bedroom. Locking the door behind her, she peeked over at Vanessa’s room. It was silent. Something told her that her roommate wasn’t awake yet. Whether it was because she didn’t have any classes, or whether it was because she’d stayed up too late the night before, she didn’t know, but she wasn’t going to bother her now. Heading out the door, Rosalie made her way out of the dorm and towards the science building. Her first class of the day was Organic Chemistry. It wasn’t one that she found particularly interesting, but it was something she would need for her chosen career, so she had to go through it. All she hoped for was a partner that wasn’t completely awful.
Taking the stairs up to the third floor, she realized she better never be late, because these stairs were no joke. She might even need to start working out just to get to her classes. There was a gym somewhere on campus, but she hadn’t considered it too important until now. She found the right room, opened the door, and almost tripped her way inside. The corner of the carpet was loose, and her sneaker had just caught it as she was coming in. Luckily, her hand was still on the door handle, and she could pass it off as if nothing happened. Her cheeks burned with embarrassment anyway, and she hastily looked around to see if anyone had seen. No one was paying attention to her at all, and it gave her some relief. There was an empty lab table near the back of the room, and she made a beeline for it. It was always easier to be at a table alone rather than be the person that came in late and had to basically ask everyone if they wanted to be partners just to find a seat. Doing a mental victory dance, she put her bag on the table and started to pull her books out. There was a steady murmur of conversation around her, and she decided to busy herself with getting a pen out and grabbing a notebook to turn to the first page.
The door opened and the professor walked in, clutching an overstuffed le
ather briefcase that seemed ready to burst open with the slightest breath of wind. He looked like the absentminded grandpa that you always saw in movies. It made her smile. Something told her that this was going to be a wonderful class. He set up his briefcase, dug through one of the pockets, then switched on the overhead projector. It put a bright light on the whiteboard behind him, and he winced as he turned to pull down the screen. He sorted through his clear plastic sheets until he found the one he wanted and put it on the projector. Rosalie flexed her hand, getting it ready to take some extensive notes.
“Hello, class, I’m Professor Hammond. This is Organic Chemistry, and we’re going to jump right into it.” He gave out the page number and Rosalie obediently turned to the correct place in her book. Her notebook was ready with the date and the title of the chapter, and her hand was poised an inch above the paper. Since class had already started, everyone’s eyes turned to the door when it opened. Rosalie’s mouth dropped open. For a full thirty seconds, she sat there, frozen, as Eric walked in, nonchalantly, like he owned the place. Rosalie told herself that he must be lost. Yes, that was it. He would take one look at what was being written on the projector and turn around. Confident that she was right, Rosalie went back to listening to the professor. She pointedly ignored him while he stood there. Finally the professor turned around. “Can I help you?” Eric shrugged.
“Well, I’m in this class, so I guess I need you to set me up with a partner.” The professor was silent for a moment, sizing him up, then turning to look at the rest of the class. His eyes met with Rosalie’s and he smiled.