Matt piled the luggage onto the cart. “I’ll bring these to the car.”
“Bye, honey.” Margo waved at Deacon.
He watched her go. “Bye, Mom.”
They walked out of the condo.
I remained behind, watching Deacon’s expression, watching the way he stared at the door even after she was gone. Regardless of his mood and emotions, he was always so handsome, whether he wore a grimace or a smile. He was beautiful—always.
I walked up to him and stopped when we were close together.
He shifted his gaze to me and held the look.
“Your mother is sweet.”
He clenched his jaw slightly, his thoughts somewhere else.
I waited for him to tell me.
“I just feel guilty…”
“Why?”
“I didn’t talk to her for almost three months.”
My heart skipped a beat as if I could feel what he felt, feel the same heavy guilt. “Deacon, you were going through a really difficult time. You left a bad marriage, moved across the country, and moved to a city where you didn’t know a single person. Give yourself a break.”
“I packed up my stuff and just took off… ran.”
“It’s okay to run sometimes. How are you supposed to take care of other people unless you take care of yourself first? Look at you now. You’re in a much better place. You’re handling Valerie. You got your mother a place just down the street. Things are good.”
“But all those things happened because of you.” He looked into my face, his brown eyes deep and focused. “I didn’t do any of those things.”
“But you hired me.”
He rubbed the back of his neck, like he wouldn’t take credit for the things I did.
“I may have gotten the ball rolling on things, but you would have made it happen…when you were ready.”
He rubbed his palm across his jawline, across the scruff that had started to come in.
“Let it go.”
He slid his hands into his pockets.
“It doesn’t matter how you got here. You’re here now. And you’re a great son, a great father, and a great friend…” He did a lot of things for me, was extremely generous, caring, protective…and he didn’t even realize it. “You’re my favorite client for a reason.”
He smiled slightly. “Because I feed you sometimes…”
I loved that smile. Loved it so much, it made my heart ache. “That does help… I’m not going to lie.”
He chuckled, his eyes softening, turning carefree, which was a rare sight.
I wanted to stay there forever, wanted to feel this good all the time. Deacon and I didn’t even have a relationship, but it felt like the best relationship of my life. It made my marriage seem heartless, made my fling with Jake feel so wrong. This felt right, perfect. “Well, I should go.” I turned away.
His hand reached for my wrist.
My heart stopped beating.
His fingers gently tugged me toward him, brought me closer to his hard body. He looked into my face, still smiling.
I thought I might die.
Then his arms moved around my waist and he hugged me, his powerful arms almost covering my entire back. His face moved into my neck as he squeezed me, not having to drop his neck far because I was in my highest pair of heels.
My arms circled his muscular torso, my cheek against his chest, my ear over his heart.
Oh wow…
He held me that way for a long time, his fingers digging through my clothes and into my flesh. His breathing was deep and gentle, and his heart was steady, like a drum in the background of a ballad.
I closed my eyes and just enjoyed it.
It was just a hug, a simple gesture between friends and family members.
But for me, it was better than sex.
The butterflies soared, my heart raced, my palms turned sweaty, my thighs ached to squeeze his hips. I wanted to brush my lips across his, feel his warm breath sprinkle across my face. I wanted to tilt my head back and feel his hot kisses all over my neck, have his scruff scratching my skin, rub along my inner thighs as he pressed his mouth against the area that ached for him most.
Fuck, I had it bad.
He continued to hug me, continued to hold me like this was normal…when it wasn’t.
I’d never wanted a man more in my life.
I hadn’t thought I could ever trust anyone again, especially not so soon, but I was ready to give myself all over again, give everything, every little piece of me…and let him hold it.
He whispered to me. “You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me…”
My breath came out shaky, my heartbeat erratic. Could he feel how frantic my heartbeat was? Could he feel my uneven breaths? Could he feel how hot I was…everywhere?
His arms slowly slid from my body, pulling away from the warmest and strongest embrace I’d ever had.
No.
He dropped his affection and moved back slightly, his eyes returning to my face.
I could only imagine how my face looked, my cheeks red, my eyes a little wet, my lips parted because I was desperate for a kiss. I knew Deacon never extended affection to anyone except family, and I’d somehow made it into his inner circle. I could feel the way he felt about me, the way he felt this chemistry too. But he didn’t act on it, didn’t take my face in his palms and kiss me the way I desperately wanted.
Tucker told me to be patient. Told me to wait.
Now I knew I would wait forever for this man.
Derek wore a backpack with the universe printed on it, and his luggage was in the same superhero theme as last time. He was ready to go, and when he saw me, his eyes lit up the way they did for his father. “Cleo!”
“Hey, Derek.” I kneeled and watched him run into my arms.
He nearly knocked me over with his sprint, and I laughed as I held on to him. “I forgot how strong you are.”
“Mom makes me eat my spinach.” He stepped back, looking like his father, just a much more innocent version.
“I can tell.” I squeezed his tiny bicep. “You’re going to be strong like your dad someday.”
He flexed both arms. “And I’m going to be smart like him too.”
“I think you already are.” I smiled before I got to my feet.
Valerie wasn’t as kind as she had been last time. She sized me up, looking at me as an opponent rather than a neutral acquaintance.
I pretended not to notice. “How are you, Valerie?” I extended my hand to shake hers.
She took it but didn’t say a word back.
The driver came and collected the luggage to put in the trunk. Derek followed him, sharing facts about space.
When her son was out of earshot, she spoke her mind. “It’s very unprofessional to go after your boss, Cleo. Deacon has higher standards than to be interested in his—” she looked me up and down “—his servant.”
How the fuck was Deacon ever married to this evil witch? She actually spoke to people like that? How did someone so adorable come from someone so mean? “Valerie, I’m not sure where this hostility is coming from, but I’ve been dating Deacon’s brother, Tucker.” I’d broken it off because, subconsciously, if things ever got serious and complicated, I would have no chance with Deacon sometime in the future. But she didn’t need to know that. Most of it was true.
Her hostility immediately died away, and she actually had the grace to look embarrassed. “Ooh…I didn’t know that.”
“We’ve been seeing each other for two months now. Deacon kinda set us up.”
Relief flooded her eyes. “Well, that’s a surprise.”
She wasn’t going to apologize to me?
Now, she smiled. “Text me when you get there.”
This woman was manipulative and controlling, having no boundaries or respect for anything except her own self-interests. It was hard to look at her and not hate her, not want to punch her right in her own home. “I will.” I turned away, dropping my smile the
second she couldn’t see my face.
“Hurry up!” Derek stomped his foot. “Dad is waiting.”
I texted Deacon when we were five minutes away.
Derek was snuggled into my side, his head on my shoulder as he slept on the drive.
We’ll be there in five minutes.
Thanks, Cleo. How’s my little man?
I took a selfie, trying not to move and wake him up. I sent it.
Derek really likes you.
I have a feeling he likes everyone.
No. He’s picky like me.
The car pulled up to the curb, and we got out.
Derek opened his eyes slowly, and when he recognized the building, he got excited again. “Yes!”
I grabbed his luggage and his backpack and took him into the elevator.
“What are we doing tomorrow?” He looked up at me.
I shrugged. “It’s a surprise.”
“Oh, come on, Cleo. I know you know everything.”
I smiled. “I do know everything…but I want your father to tell you.”
“You won’t even give me a hint?”
I shook my head.
The doors opened, and we walked down the hallway.
Derek ran to the door and stabbed his fingers into the doorbell over and over. “Dad!”
I smiled as I took my time, wanting to give them time to embrace before I got there.
The door opened, and Deacon squatted down. “There’s my little man.” He wrapped his arms around him and hugged him tight, his chin resting on his head.
Derek hugged him back, a miniature version of his father. He pulled away and pulled a folded piece of paper out of his pocket. “I made you another drawing.” He unfolded it and presented it to him. “It’s you and me at the cabin.”
Deacon smiled wide as he stared at it. “I love it. Thank you.”
“I thought you’d like it since you liked the last one so much.”
“Very thoughtful. Thank you.” He gave him another hug and a kiss on the hairline. “Hungry?”
He shook his head. “I had cereal on the plane.”
He rose to his feet. “That’s not enough for a growing man like you.” He guided him inside.
I made it to the door.
Instead of dropping his smile when he looked at me, he still wore it, like he was just as happy to see me as he was to see Derek. “Let me take that.” He pulled the backpack off my arm and welcomed me inside.
I rolled the luggage into the living room.
He set the bag on the couch and came back to me. “How was the flight?”
Derek helped himself to the kitchen, opening the fridge. “Can I have a beer?”
Deacon looked at him over his shoulder. “What?”
“You drink it.”
“No, Derek. When you’re older.”
“That’s what you always say… When you’re older.”
Deacon chuckled and turned back to me. “Sorry, how was the flight?”
“It was good. We colored.” I found him even more attractive when he interacted with Derek, when he behaved like a father…because he was good at it. He was loving, affectionate, and grateful to have a son like Derek.
“Want to join us for dinner? Grilled chicken breasts with rice and veggies.”
Derek cringed from the kitchen. “Ugh. Chicken nuggets!”
He didn’t take his eyes off me. “Or chicken nuggets, if you prefer.”
I should say no and leave, but I was tired of denying his requests when I wanted to stay…when I didn’t want to go home to my empty apartment with the sound of the TV in the background. I wanted to hear Deacon’s voice, hear Derek’s laughter. “I’ll pass on the nuggets. But the first thing on the menu sounds good.”
“Great.” He smiled at me, wearing the handsomest smile I’d ever seen, the kind that showed all his teeth and made his eyes shine. He gave me a one-armed hug as I came inside then shut the door behind me.
The touch was quick, but it was natural.
Like he didn’t think twice about it.
Derek eyed his father’s glass of wine. “What’s that?”
“Wine.” Deacon cut into his food.
“It looks like dirty water.”
I chuckled. “Good observation.”
“Can I have some?” He reached for the glass.
Deacon pushed it away. “Why are you so interested in alcohol all of a sudden?”
He shrugged, sitting in front of his empty plate. “Grown-ups drink it all the time.”
“But you aren’t a grown-up.”
“Yeah…I guess. Where does wine come from?”
“Grapes,” Deacon answered.
“Doesn’t my juice come from grapes?”
“Correct.” Deacon never showed a hint of annoyance with all the questions.
“So…am I drinking wine?” Derek asked.
“No. The grapes go through a fermentation process,” Deacon explained. “Which brings out the alcohol. And the grapes in vineyards are different from the kinds put into your juice. If you were to take grape off a vine and put it in your mouth, it would taste sour, not sweet.”
Derek absorbed the information, like he was thinking it over.
“How’s your mom?” Deacon asked.
Derek left his asparagus on the plate, only eating the nuggets his father made. “Same.”
“Do you have fun with her?”
“Not really,” he answered. “She’s boring. She never likes to do anything.”
That didn’t surprise me at all. She’d only had a son to tie down Deacon, not to nurture him and raise him into an amazing person. It was completely selfish. Ugh, I hated her. I could barely think about her without getting worked up about it.
Deacon didn’t ask any more questions.
“So, what are we doing tomorrow?” Derek asked. “Going to the cabin?”
“Actually, we’re taking you to the planetarium,” Deacon answered.
We?
“Seriously?” Derek slid his fingers into his thick hair, so excited he might explode like a rocket. “Dad, that’s so awesome! I’ve always wanted to go. It’s going to be so cool! Like the coolest thing ever…” He continued to ramble.
Deacon turned to me, smiling slightly as he listened to his son go on and on.
I smiled back, knowing he was thanking me with his look, sharing his son’s excitement with me…like I was part of the family.
I’d turned one of Deacon’s guest rooms into a permanent bedroom for Derek.
I had a feeling he would be visiting a lot more.
Deacon walked inside, saw the walls covered with space-themed wallpaper with a poster of Neil Armstrong on the moon like the one he had at home, the bed, and the other matching furniture I’d placed inside. There were framed pictures of him and Deacon on the walls, pictures I took at the cabin. “Wow…this is so cool.” He ran to the bed and started to jump on it.
Deacon leaned against the doorframe, his arms crossed over his chest, staring at his son with a slight grin on his face. “I think he likes it.”
He kept jumping. “Look, I’m like Armstrong on the moon…”
Deacon chuckled. “I’m going to walk Cleo out. I’ll be right back.”
Derek was too interested in his room to care.
Deacon turned away and pulled out his phone from his pocket, firing off a quick text. Then he returned it to his pocket. “Thanks for picking him up today.”
“My pleasure.”
“I would go myself, but I don’t think it would be productive to see Valerie in the flesh. I know you’re busy, so I would send someone else, but I don’t trust anyone else with Derek.”
That was the biggest compliment he’d ever given me. “I don’t mind.”
“How was she?” He stepped into the hallway.
I decided not to tell him how psycho she was. “Fine. What are you doing?”
He turned back to me.
“Deacon, you don’t need to walk me out.”
&n
bsp; He glanced into the residence, like he was torn. He wanted to walk me out, but he didn’t want to leave his son alone. “My driver is waiting for you downstairs.”
Now I knew who he was texting. “I’m serious, Deacon. You don’t have to do that—”
“I’m not letting you walk home in the dark.”
“I could take a cab—”
“But I know you won’t. And I don’t want you alone in a cab either.”
Deacon always went out of his way to take care of me…even when I wasn’t his responsibility. It was sweet, sweeter than I could put into words. “Well…thank you.”
“Of course.” He closed the door behind him so we wouldn’t have to listen to Derek yell as he bounced on the bed. He stood in front of me, even though there wasn’t much else to say. “What time are we going tomorrow?”
“The car will pick you up at seven p.m.”
“You mean, we.”
I raised an eyebrow. “I didn’t realize you wanted me to accompany you.”
“I just assumed you would…unless you’re busy or something.”
Even if I were, I would cancel any plans to spend the evening with him and Derek. “No, I’m not busy. But I thought you’d want to spend the evening alone with him. That’ll be a great memory for the two of you.”
“Why wouldn’t it be a great memory if it was all three of us?” He asked the question like he was genuinely bewildered by my statement, like I was as much a part of their lives as Tucker or his mother, like I belonged there.
“I’ll see you tomorrow, then.” Now, I couldn’t wait to go to sleep and wake up tomorrow, to spend the evening with the two of them…the people who’d become a family I didn’t realize I needed. When my husband left me, I felt so alone, completely on my own. But Deacon made me feel like I was part of something…and not because it was my job. “Goodnight.”
“Goodnight, Cleo.” He smiled at me before he walked back inside his residence. Derek’s yells went silent the second the door was shut.
I stayed there for a few more seconds, missing both of them the moment they were gone.
Nine
Deacon
We arrived at the planetarium after hours, and Cleo checked us in. She’d somehow reserved the place for us to enjoy alone. There was never a request I made that she couldn’t fulfill. She was a woman of limitless knowledge, of determination that couldn’t be deterred.
The Man Who Has No Heart (Soulless Book 2) Page 8