He continued by threatening to fire every one of them then pulled out his little green notebook. Just like that, the come-to-Jesus was over and they were discussing soldier business. Like it was a completely normal meeting and the five first sergeants hadn’t just been compared to Stalin and the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse in the same breath.
“Washington, are you tracking you and your fun little band of miscreants have to be at the Corps Headquarters tonight?”
Holly kept her expression carefully blank. “I am now, Sarn’t Major. What offense am I going to take it in the shorts for?”
“One of your special little fuck sticks was apparently playing music too loud again.”
She closed her eyes. “Her name wouldn’t happen to be Freeman, would it?”
“How’d you guess?”
“Are we ready to start talking about taking her rank, Sarn’t Major? ’Cause I’m just about sick of her shit,” Holly mumbled.
Beside her, Sorren grunted. She wasn’t sure if that was a laugh or a sympathetic noise. “Not funny,” she said under her breath.
“Of course it is. You don’t think you’re going to be the only one of us who doesn’t get bent over by the Corps sergeant major, do you?”
“A girl could dream,” she said dryly.
“Iaconelli, I need a status report on your range qualifications. Are we ready to hit the shoot house next week?”
“Roger, Sarn’t Major,” Iaconelli said. Holly didn’t know the big guy very well but he was taking over for Sorren as Bandit Company’s first sergeant since Sorren had gone and had himself a heart attack.
Sorren got the unlucky job of taking charge of the rear detachment with the Captain Anders who was also new to the unit. Holly was pretty sure he would rather be going to Iraq. Hell, he’d be one dumb bastard if he wanted to stay home. No way she’d want the Rear D job.
“Gentlemen, I’m tired of the boss pissing on my leg about this formation,” Cox said after a moment.
Holly briefly thought about grabbing her breasts to see if she’d somehow morphed into a guy but thought better of it. Cox looked like he was about to blow a gasket and she honestly didn’t want to deal with him, especially since he was already fired up. “If I need to make it painful for you, I will. We’re starting a weekly high-risk meeting. Each week, you’re going to brief me on what your high-risk soldiers are doing and what we’re doing to mitigate that risk. I expect daily updates on legal packets on every troublemaker we’ve got in this formation and I want them gone. Sorren is going to have his hands full with the spouses and the sick, lame, weak, lazy or crazy we leave back here. He doesn’t need to be dealing with criminals, too.”
Sorren made a sound that was suspiciously like a sniff. Holly shot him a quick look but not before Cox figured out that Sorren was screwing with him. “You think it’s funny, Sorren?”
“I didn’t know you cared, Sarn’t Major,” Sorren said, sounding a little choked up.
“Did you hit your head when you had that heart attack?” Holly asked.
“Get the hell out,” Cox snapped. They all turned to go. “Not you, Washington.”
Holly stood fast. Damn it.
“What happened to your face?”
“Tried getting Pizarro out of a fight at Ropers. Didn’t work out so well,” she said. The truth, actually. It felt good not to lie to him. “Why didn’t Bello get his own platoon sergeant out of the fight?”
“He actually made things worse, Sarn’t Major. I had things under control until he showed up.”
Cox lifted one eyebrow. “So you’re still having problems out of him?”
Problems? No, she wouldn’t say problems. “We’ve come to a working agreement, Sarn’t Major.” She paused.
“Good. Don’t be late for the Corps sergeant major.”
Holly left before her mouth engaged again and wrote a check her ass couldn’t cash.
* * *
Holly apparently sucked at makeup. She hadn’t managed to hide the bruise on her jaw from Sarn’t Major Cox and Captain Reheres noticed the minute they stepped out of the command group. And of course, she called her on it.
“Did you decide to take up combatives this weekend?” she asked dryly at first formation.
She could let the lie stand, let Reheres fill in the blanks and not answer. But that would complicate an already complicated situation. What was the saying? It wasn’t the crime that did you in, but the lies covering it up.
“Not exactly. I got called to Ropers to get my favorite sergeant out of a tight spot and things didn’t go as planned.”
Reheres lifted one brow in the shadows cast by the overhead light. “Oh, do tell.”
Holly shrugged. “Sarn’t Freeman broke restriction and her no-contact order again. I’m writing her up and adding to her packet. You’ll have the field grade Article Fifteen on your desk by noon.”
“You need a class on the proper use of concealer,” Reheres said as though Holly hadn’t just briefed her on one of their problem soldiers.
Holly looked at the younger captain sharply then. There was something in the younger woman’s tone that caught her attention, that sounded far too familiar. “Unless there’s something you need to tell me?”
Reheres flushed but did not look away. “I had a good friend once who was in a bad relationship. The one time I was around when he hit her, we spent some quality time at a makeup counter in Austin learning to hide the evidence.” Reheres shrugged, fidgeting with the edge of her notebook. “Funny thing. Turned out the makeup artist, her name was Faith, had a lot of experience with men and women. She volunteered at a local shelter for abused women.”
Holly released a quiet sigh. “I don’t suppose this story has a happy ending?”
Reheres tucked her hands into her reflective belt. “My friend got out of the army because her boyfriend threatened to kill himself if she didn’t.” She kicked at a random stone on the pavement. “We’ve lost touch.”
“I’m sorry,” Holly said after a moment.
“Can’t save everyone, right?” But there was nothing flip in her seemingly nonchalant words. There was pain beneath them, raw and fresh.
She gripped Reheres’ shoulder, hoping that the army wouldn’t destroy the kind soul in this young captain. It could be brutal on people who cared like she did. There was a healthy dose of cynicism needed to do this job well. But sometimes, people needed to be reminded that what they did mattered.
“Doesn’t mean the ones we can’t save don’t break our hearts.” Bad memories wrestled in the dark recesses of her heart.
“Isn’t that the truth? Anyway, what do I need to tell the battalion commander about this little number?” She motioned to the shadow on Holly’s jaw.
“The truth, I guess. Went to Ropers to try and get one of Diablo’s platoon sergeants out of an arrest. Things went poorly. Luckily, no one got arrested.”
“And the only incident we report is your heroic jaw.”
“First Sergeant!”
Holly stiffened at the anger in Sal’s voice. She was expecting it but still, it crawled up her spine and squeezed, reminding her that she was all too vulnerable.
She turned, bracing for what was coming, and saluted sharply. “Sir.”
“You plan on telling me why the battalion commander wasn’t tracking the hell that happened Saturday night?” Bello was visibly angry and for a moment, Holly doubted that this was staged.
“Which part, sir?” she said. Every eye in three companies was on them.
“The part where you got into a fight at the bar with my platoon sergeant? Do you always keep important information from your commanders?”
Reheres stepped to Holly’s side. “You’re out of line, Sal,” Reheres said.
Holly wanted to cheer for Reheres finding her backbone and standing up to Sal. Unfortunately, a thin coat of guilt covered her skin because the reason she was even standing there was based on a lie. Holly felt dirty.
“No, your first sergeant is out of
line. I just got my ass ripped open because battalion commander wasn’t tracking the damn fight.”
“You were responsible for sending that information higher, sir.” Holly struggled to keep her voice level and calm. “I can do a lot but I’m damn sure not going to do your job for you.”
Echoes of older fights stood between them now. It was like the weekend hadn’t happened. That she hadn’t spent the night wrapped in this man’s arms, feeling his heart beating in time with hers.
It reminded her with brilliant, aching clarity why getting involved at work was stupid. It didn’t matter that the fight wasn’t real. It felt real.
She took a step backward, needing the distance from his anger. It was too close to home. Dredging up too many unplanned memories.
You don’t get a vote, Holly.
Don’t get it twisted, Todd. I most certainly do.
You fucking reported me?
And I’ll do it again if you ever put your hands on me again.
She hadn’t expected that memory to rise from the abyss, to twist around her spine and seize her guts until she thought she might puke right there on the PT field.
“I told you to send the report,” Sal said. She could hear the uncertainty in his voice, the hesitation behind the anger. Saw the flash of worry in his eyes.
“Again, you do your job and I’ll do mine, sir.” She glanced at Captain Reheres. “Ma’am, we need to do the huddle for the morning before the motorpool. I’ve got updates for you from over the weekend.”
“I wasn’t finished, First Sergeant,” he said.
She turned and offered a silent salute. “We’re done here, sir.”
She walked off, feeling dirty for lying to her commander, conflicted about everything that had just transpired. It had sounded good when she’d been cradled in his arms, felt his fingers threaded with hers.
But it was something different in the cold morning light.
Something that left a bad taste in her mouth. Something that felt like a betrayal of everything that she was, that she’d thought she’d stood for.
19
“You are advised that you do not have to say anything at this time.” Holly kept her voice flat and emotionless as she read Sergeant Freeman her rights.
The young sergeant stood at parade rest, her head and eyes locked on a spot over Holly’s head.
“Do you wish to make a statement?”
“No, First Sergeant.”
“Okay. Initial and sign here.” Holly slid the form toward Sarn’t Freeman and watched as she scribbled where instructed.
Then she escorted her to the commander’s office where Captain Reheres was waiting to drop a bombshell on Sarn’t Freeman.
The young sergeant reported, saluting sharply. Captain Reheres returned the salute then left Freeman standing at the position of attention.
“Sergeant Freeman, I am directing you to be referred for a mental health evaluation.”
Freeman balked. Her eyes widened and her mouth dropped open. “For what?”
“For what, ma’am,” Holly corrected mildly.
Freeman snapped back to attention and went silent as Reheres continued to read the form. Freeman signed violently and tried to stalk out but Holly stopped her. She opened the door where one of her platoon sergeants was waiting.
“Sarn’t Germany, you know where she has to go?” Sarn’t First Class Germany was a big woman who intimidated the hell out of most of the people around her. Most folks didn’t know that she was as gentle as a kitten, though. It was for both of those reasons that Holly had tasked her to escort Freeman to the psych eval appointment.
“Roger, First Sergeant.”
Holly closed the door and turned back to her commander. “I’m only half confident that Freeman will actually make it to the appointment,” Holly said, sinking down into her chair. “She might go AWOL.”
Reheres shrugged. “At this point, I’m so frustrated with this young woman, I’m this close to not caring.”
Holly nodded and wished she didn’t feel the same. “I get that. But part of the reason we’re doing the mental health eval is to see what’s going on. If, and this is a big if, we can help her, then I think we should try to get her into counseling. But if she insists on going back to and or staying in the abusive relationship, what are we supposed to do? We can’t stop her at this point because she’s demonstrated that she’s refusing to obey orders. And she’s putting herself at risk. We can’t have an NCO doing that. We need all hands on deck.”
A sick feeling twisted in Holly’s guts. They were dancing dangerously close to a conversation Holly had had once upon a time. When her own competence had been questioned because her husband had knocked her two front teeth out.
She kept trying to tell herself that this was different. That Todd had hit her once and she’d walked away. But it felt too much like splitting hairs and trying to justify her actions after the fact.
It felt dirty and wrong to be coming down on Freeman this way. Even though she knew, knew, that if things continued, there was no way Freeman could stay in the unit or the Army.
She closed her eyes and rubbed the bridge of her nose. Her jaw ached. “I need to talk to Captain Bello and First Sergeant Delgado about what they’re going to do with Pizarro. It’s fine if we take action on Freeman but they have to deal with the man actually doing the hitting.”
“Didn’t Bello call the cops on him?”
“Yeah, but I have to see what happened with that,” Holly said. “Can you get on the commander’s calendar? He needs to be read in on this stuff. We can’t go after Freeman without making sure they’re putting Pizarro out, too. That’s just too many ways of screwed up to even think about.”
“I will,” Captain Reheres said. “Are you going to talk to the Sarn’t Major?”
“Yeah, I’m on my way there next.”
“Have fun. He scares the shit out of me.”
Holly grinned. “We have to get you over being scared of these guys. Most of them are giant pussy cats.”
Reheres arched one eyebrow. “Maybe a rabid pussycat,” she said. “Cox is terrifying. He threatened to shove my patrol cap up my ass if I didn’t fix it.”
Holly burst out laughing. “That’s how you know he cares. He wouldn’t have said anything to you if he didn’t think you were worth a damn.”
Reheres rolled her eyes. “That’s so screwed up.”
Still grinning, Holly headed to battalion. Cox was waiting for her. “Close the door, First Sergeant.” She did as she was instructed, well aware they were on professional ground today. “Sit down and tell me what the hell is going on between you and Bello.”
The sick feeling was back, twisting like a knife in her belly. “Sarn’t Major?”
“Don’t give me that bullshit, kid. I know you, remember. And I saw you making google-y eyes at Bello this morning during that nice little display you put on. Is he screwing with you?”
A warning prickled over her skin. “I wouldn’t put it that way, Sarn’t Major.”
He went quiet. Holly hated it when he went quiet.
“Is there anything you need to tell me?”
Her throat tightened and she looked up at her long-time mentor and friend. “I’m not sure if I can answer that without putting you in a bad spot.”
He snorted. “I’ve got twenty-five years in the army. What are they going to do, make me retire?”
She swallowed again. “It’s complicated,” she whispered.
“It always is when you love another soldier.” Finally he sighed. “Look, keep it quiet. Don’t let this shit get out. Don’t give the boss a reason to start an inquiry and look into you two.”
She studied him and said nothing, not sure if her voice would work or not.
“It’s been a long time since I saw you actually interested in someone else. And for all his problems, Bello is a decent guy. If he treats you right, then I give less than a fuck about the officer/enlisted rules. Life is too damn short to let what happened to yo
u in Korea steal any chance at happiness from you.”
Holly breathed out deeply, clenching her hands in her lap to keep them from shaking. “Yeah, we need to talk about that.”
There was a knock on the door and the sergeant major’s driver stuck his head in the office. “Sarn’t Major, we have a problem.”
* * *
There was a crowd following an easily identifiable bald head around the quad. The corps sergeant major was a big man—broad chest, wide shoulders—he looked like a linebacker and despite pushing fifty, he was physically dominating. His dark copper skin gleamed in the heat as he launched into some unsuspecting soul about a cigarette butt on the ground.
Holly slipped through the crowd and stopped next to Sal, who was the only officer in the crowd. “What’s going on?” She kept her voice low, not wanting to bring attention to either of them.
“Found some soldiers drinking in the quad,” Sal said.
“Anyone know who the lucky first sergeant is?”
“I think you might have hit the lottery.”
Holly groaned. “Fuuck.”
The corps sergeant major turned toward the gathered crowd, a handful of grass in his hand. “This is what I’m talking about. You first sergeants are failing to instill basic discipline in your troops. If you can’t even get them to cut the damn grass and police up their cigarette butts, how the hell are you going to get them to occupy a remote combat outpost?”
“Not even close to the same thing,” Holly grumbled.
His penetrating dark eyes pinned her ruthlessly to the spoke. “Excuse me, First Sergeant? Say that loud enough that we can hear?”
Holly cleared her throat. “I was thinking the exact same thing, Sarn’t Major.”
Beside her, Sal choked and quickly turned it into a cough, burying his mouth in his elbow to mask the coughing fit.
“Which company is yours, First Sergeant?”
“This one, Sarn’t Major.”
“And this is the kind of unit you’re running?”
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