Surrender

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Surrender Page 34

by HELEN HARDT


  “I have to go, Zach. Sam is expecting me.”

  “Dusty, please don’t run from me again. It’s getting old.”

  “But—”

  “Sam’s a big boy. He can take care of himself. He and Chad are probably drinking beer and chasing women.”

  “I know.” She sighed.

  “Are you ever going to tell me what’s going on with you?” Zach asked, still stroking her hair.

  “There’s nothing going on.” She hid her face and inhaled. Even his armpits smelled good, like musk and cloves.

  Zach nudged her and turned on his side, wincing. “Fuck.”

  “Don’t move. Are you all right?”

  “Yeah. Yeah.” He tipped her chin upward to look into her eyes. “Look, I won’t push you to talk, but if you’re going to be with me, don’t ever lie to me again.”

  “I’m not lying.”

  “Damn it, Dusty. I know there’s something going on. If you’re not ready to tell me, I can accept that. I don’t like it, mainly because I want to move heaven and earth to help you, but I can accept it.” His blue eye glowed the color of a hot gas flame. “But do not lie to me.”

  “All right, Zach. I won’t lie to you. Just don’t ask me anymore.”

  “Fair enough,” he said. “Just know that whatever it is, it won’t make a damn difference to me.”

  “How can you say that without knowing what it is?”

  “Because I care about you, you damn stubborn woman!”

  No. He couldn’t care for her. He’d get hurt. “Zach, you hardly know me. We really only just met a few days ago.”

  “Don’t try to tell me what I feel. I’m thirty years old, and I never say anything other than what I mean. I care for you. I want to be with you. I think it’ll grow into something more. Something amazing.”

  “Zach, I don’t know…”

  “You don’t have to say anything.”

  Dusty burst into tears.

  Zach sighed. “Not exactly the reaction I’d hoped for.”

  “I’m sorry,” she sobbed. She wanted to return his feelings. She wanted to profess her undying love and stay with him forever, but that wouldn’t be fair to him. He deserved better than what she could offer him. “Just don’t pressure me, okay?”

  “I won’t. I know you’re not ready to talk to me yet, but when you are, I’ll be here, and I’m not going anywhere.”

  “What did I ever do to deserve you?”

  He chuckled. “You’re so adorable. So damned perfect.”

  Perfect. Perfect she was not. If he only knew. But she didn’t want to cry anymore. She wanted to share this night with Zach and pretend everything was all right, but it wasn’t right to lead him on.

  “I can’t stay with you tonight, Zach.”

  “Yes, you can. You have to.” His eyes smiled at her. “You’re the reason I’m in this situation, darlin’. I need you to take care of me.”

  “I think your ma and Angelina can handle that.”

  “I don’t want them. I want my woman to take care of me.”

  He sure knew how to get to her. She wanted to be his woman. She wanted to take care of him, and the territorial lioness in her didn’t want Angelina anywhere near him. True enough—it was her fault he was wounded. She owed him her care. And it was a good excuse to spend the night with him, anyway.

  “I’ll stay,” she said.

  “Wonderful. Let’s order up some dinner, and then I’ll let you play nursemaid.” He grinned rakishly. “You may have to bathe me.”

  “It would be my pleasure.”

  “Darlin’, the pleasure will be mine.”

  * * *

  Zach couldn’t immerse his wound, so Dusty gave him a sponge bath after dinner. It was a pleasure to cleanse his strong body. She especially enjoyed washing his genitals, seeing his cock grow before her eyes as she fondled him. “This is a bath,” she teased, “not foreplay.”

  When she finished bathing him, she helped him on crutches to the bathroom and shaved his face.

  “Have you ever thought about growing a beard?”

  “Not really. Why?”

  “I like the feel of it when we kiss, and when you do…other things.” She warmed.

  “Then I’ll grow a beard for you. But I’ll have to start tomorrow, because you just shaved it off.”

  “A short goatee would look good on you. With your long hair, it would be a nice contrast. You’d look even more like a movie star than you already do.”

  “You think I look like a movie star?”

  “The handsomest one in Hollywood.” She rinsed his face with a warm cloth. “Now lower your head. I’m going to wash your beautiful hair.”

  When she finished, she changed the linens on the bed, which were damp from his sponge bath, and helped him get comfortable.

  “Okay, soldier,” she said. “Time to look at the wound. Tell me what to do.”

  “The dressing and antibiotic ointment are in the top dresser drawer,” he said, motioning. “You’ll need to clean it with peroxide first.”

  “Okay.” She took a deep breath and removed the bandage slowly, trying not to hurt him. She gasped when she saw his wound—several tight black stitches laced around a pinkish gash. “You poor thing. I’m so sorry!”

  “I’m fine.”

  “Zach, it’s all red, and it’s swollen. It’s oozing a little, too. It doesn’t look right to me. I hope it’s not infected.”

  “It’s not deep,” Zach said. “I didn’t need surgery or anything. I’ve seen worse, believe me. Much worse. It’s just a nick. They wouldn’t have let me out of the hospital if it was bad.”

  “How can you still want to be with me after I did this to you?”

  “You didn’t do anything. It was Diablo, last time I checked.”

  “Still…”

  “Darlin’, you’re my woman. I want you. Nothing will change that.”

  If only that were the case, Dusty thought. No matter. Right now Zach needed her, and she wasn’t going to let him down. She saturated a cotton ball with peroxide and cleaned the wound. The solution bubbled as it touched the injury, and Zach tensed.

  “Okay?” she asked.

  “Yeah. Fine,” he said through clenched teeth.

  Once she felt it was clean enough, she smeared it with antibiotic ointment and covered it with gauze and a clean bandage.

  “Do you have any pills you need to take? Pain pills? Antibiotics?”

  “I took both of them with dinner.”

  “Okay. Anything else?”

  “Just you in my arms. That’s all I need.”

  She smiled. “I guess I can handle that.” She shed the robe she wore and crawled into bed next to him. “No funny business. I want you to sleep. You need your rest.”

  “You take the fun out of everything.” He yawned.

  “See? You’re exhausted.”

  “Mmm,” he said. “Maybe a little sleep wouldn’t hurt.” He wrapped his arms around her. “As long as you’re here when I wake up.”

  “I’m not going anywhere.”

  “Promise?”

  “Yeah.”

  For now, anyway.

  Chapter Twelve

  Heat. Blind heat. And trembling. Something was shaking next to her. Dusty woke from her dreams to find Zach clamped to her body. He was burning with fever.

  She started to move, but he tightened his grip on her. “C-C-Cold,” he said through clenched teeth. “D-Don’t go.”

  “Zach, sweetheart, I have to get up. I have to take care of you. I think you have a fever.”

  “M-More covers,” he said.

  It killed her to leave him, knowing she was his source of warmth. She checked the clock on the night table. Two-thirty. “I’m sorry. I’ll be back as soon as I can. I need to check your wound. I told you it didn’t look right earlier. It must be infected.”

  “D-Don’t leave me.”

  “I won’t. I’ll be right here.”

  She scrambled away from him and out of
bed and pushed the sheets and blankets around his shivering body. She turned on the lights and blinked at the harsh invasion. “Zach,” she said, “I have to look at your leg. I’m just going to get your leg out from under the covers, but I’ll keep the rest of you tucked in, okay?”

  He nodded his head, his teeth chattering.

  Carefully Dusty pulled his leg out from under the blankets and deftly removed the bandage. She gasped as she gaped at the pus draining from the injury. Small pink lines radiated from the wound, marring his beautiful skin.

  “Zach, I need to take you to the hospital. You have an infection.”

  He continued to shiver and didn’t respond to her.

  “Can you get up?”

  He shook his head. “C-Can’t. T-Too cold.”

  “You have to. Please. I’ll help you.” She pulled at him but realized she wouldn’t be able to move him without help. She wished she could give him something for the fever, but she was afraid to mix anything over-the-counter with his prescriptions.

  She reached for the phone on the night table and dialed the front desk. “I need some help. Mr. McCray has a fever, and I need to get him to the hospital.”

  “I’ll call 9-1-1, ma’am.”

  “Thank you.” Dusty shrugged. She could have done that herself. What was she thinking? She needed to get her head on straight. Her man needed her.

  Her man.

  Yes, her man. He was her man. He had been all along. There was no fighting it. In some sinless way, she had known since she was six, the last day she had seen him, when he had told her to keep her chin up. And she had. Through all the hard times and the pain, she had. She had learned what was worthy of her fear and what wasn’t because of that lanky adolescent who had treated her with kindness.

  She would never love another.

  Quickly, she dressed herself and then helped Zach into his lounge pants. “Sweetheart,” she said, “where’s your cell phone?”

  “D-Drawer.”

  “Which drawer?” When he didn’t answer she began opening and closing drawers frantically until she found it in with his underwear. She thumbed through his contact list and called Chad and his mother. Within minutes they were both in Zach’s room.

  “Let’s get him down to the lobby,” Chad said and scooped his brother into his arms. “You’re a heavy SOB, aren’t you?” Chad’s face was somber when Zach didn’t respond.

  “He’s cold,” Dusty said. “Please, he needs blankets. Or at least a robe.” She grabbed one of the white hotel robes and tucked it around Zach. Tears slid from her eyes. He looked so helpless in his brother’s arms.

  “Come now, sugar.” Laurie McCray put her arms around Dusty. “I just thank God you were here with him. He’s going to be all right.”

  They reached the lobby as the ambulance was pulling into the circular drive at the front. Two paramedics lifted Zach onto a stretcher, and one of them asked if anyone wanted to ride with him.

  “I will.” Dusty raced forward.

  “You his wife?” the paramedic asked.

  “Uh, no. I’m his…girlfriend.”

  “We prefer it to be a family member.”

  Laurie stepped forward. “I’ll go. I’m his mother.”

  “Please,” Dusty begged. “I need to be with him.”

  “Come on, twerp.” Chad grabbed her hand. “You and I can follow in the pickup.”

  Dusty nodded through hiccups and tears.

  Chad fished a bandana out of his pocket. “Here.”

  She took it and wiped her eyes. “Thanks.”

  “He’s gonna be okay. The fool’s too stubborn for something like this to keep him down.”

  Dusty nodded and sniffed again.

  “And he doesn’t blame you. He probably should, but he doesn’t. But you’re going to have to tell him the truth eventually.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I mean the truth. About you. About the ranch.”

  “How much has Sam told you?”

  “Just that you’re struggling. The ranch needs money.”

  She breathed a sigh of relief. Sam hadn’t betrayed her trust. Thank God.

  “I’m sure Zach has already guessed that much,” she said.

  “Undoubtedly.” Chad nodded. “But it’ll mean more to him if you tell him. Confide in him. He’ll help you.”

  “Why on earth would he help me?”

  “Because he’s in love with you.”

  She looked up to Chad’s face. “He told you that?”

  “Hell, no. He didn’t have to. It’s obvious. I’ve never seen him ferocious over a woman before. That’s the only word to describe his reaction when Harper indicated an interest in you.”

  “We’ve only just met.”

  “You just referred to yourself as his girlfriend. I heard you.”

  Chad opened the door to the pickup and Dusty scrambled inside. Chad sat down in the driver’s seat.

  “I didn’t really know how else to put it,” she said.

  “Do you love him, Dusty?”

  Her cheeks warmed, and she was thankful for the darkness of the night. This wasn’t any of Chad’s business, but for some reason, she wanted to talk. She wasn’t quite ready to say the actual words. Not to Chad, anyway. “I-I don’t know. I’ve never been in love before.”

  “Neither has Zach.”

  “Not even with Angelina?”

  Chad scoffed. “Especially not with Angelina.”

  “But they were engaged.”

  “So?” He turned the key in the ignition. “Look, Zach and I, we’re cowboys. We don’t talk about this sort of thing. In fact, he’d probably whoop my ass if he knew I was telling you any of this. But I know my brother like the back of my hand. He’s in love with you. I’d stake my fortune on it.”

  “Let’s just get to the hospital, Chad.”

  “Agreed.” He backed out of the parking lot. Then, “There’s something else I’d stake my fortune on.”

  “What’s that?”

  “You’re in love with him, too.”

  * * *

  Dusty sat in the hospital waiting room, leaning into Chad’s hard form. Laurie sat on Chad’s other side, her worried eyes sunken and sad. None of them spoke.

  “Sam!” Dusty jumped up and ran into her brother’s arms as he entered. “Thanks for coming.”

  “What’s going on? How’s he doing?”

  “No news yet,” Chad said, “but it shouldn’t be too much longer.”

  “Can I get any of you all anything?” Sam asked. “Coffee or something?”

  Dusty shook her head.

  “Nothing for me, bud,” Chad said.

  “How about you, Ms. McCray?”

  “Nothing, sugar. And please, call me Laurie, Sam.”

  Sam sat down next to Dusty and took her hand. “He’ll be all right, Dust.”

  She nodded and gulped down a sob.

  After what seemed like hours, Zach’s doctor finally entered. “Mrs. McCray,” he said.

  “Yes. How is he?” Laurie asked.

  “So far, so good. His wound is infected, so we have him on IV antibiotics. It’s probably just a local staph infection, fairly common with this type of injury, but because of his high fever, we want to err on the side of caution. I have him on three different medications, plus a sedative.”

  “I see.”

  “It’s lucky you got him here when you did. His fever was nearly one hundred and five degrees. If it had gone any higher, he could have had a seizure.”

  Dusty nearly lost her footing. “Lord…”

  “Thank God you were with him, sugar,” Laurie said. Then, turning back to the doctor, “How quickly do you expect him to respond?”

  “Within twenty-four hours if all goes as planned. We’ll keep an eye on him. He’s not in any immediate danger that I can see, so you all can go home and get some rest if you want.”

  “I’m not leaving,” Dusty said. “I’ll stay with him.”

  “He’s not responsive, ma’am,
” the doctor said. “He’s sedated.”

  “I don’t care. I’m staying. I’ll sit with him.”

  “It’s the middle of the night, Dust,” Sam said.

  “Do I look like I care? I said I’m staying.”

  “I think he’d like her to be here, Sam,” Chad said and turned to Laurie. “Come on, Ma. I’ll take you back to the hotel. We can get a few hours of sleep and then we’ll come back.”

  “You should go too, Sam,” Dusty said. “You’re competing tomorrow.”

  “Yeah, I know.”

  “I’m sorry I won’t be there.”

  “It’s okay. I understand. You need to be here.”

  She nodded. “You’ll be great. But you need some sleep. You can still get a few hours.”

  “I’ve busted broncs on less sleep than this. I’ll be fine.”

  “Just the same—”

  “Yeah, I’ll go. If you need me, just call.”

  Left alone in the waiting room, Dusty walked down the corridor to Zach’s private room. He lay on the bed, covered, one arm on top of the sheets hooked to an IV drip. Dusty moved the vinyl recliner in the corner next to the bed and sat down, taking Zach’s hand in hers. “I’m here,” she whispered. “I’m here, sweetheart.”

  She thought she felt him squeeze her hand.

  * * *

  He awoke for a few minutes after dawn. Dusty brought his hand to her lips and kissed his fingertips. “Hey there,” she said.

  “Hey.”

  “How’re you feeling?”

  “Been better,” he rasped. “Water?”

  “Right away.” She quickly poured a cup from the pitcher on his night table and held it to his lips. “Here. Drink, sweetheart.”

  “What happened?” he asked.

  “Your leg is infected. You had a really high fever last night.”

  “I’m sorry, darlin’.”

  “Stop being silly. There’s nothing to be sorry about.”

  “I wanted to love you all night.”

  “You just concentrate on getting better. They’re drugging you with all kinds of meds, and you’ll be back on your feet in no time.”

  “I’m glad you’re here.”

  “There’s nowhere else I’d be.”

  His parched lips curved upward slightly.

  Dusty kissed his forehead. He was sweaty and clammy, but still quite hot. “I’ll be right back,” she said. She went to the bathroom and wet a cloth with cool water. When she returned, she pressed it to his forehead.

 

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