Just as I stood, a story on the news caught my ear. I turned toward the TV in time to see a bleary-eyed couple standing in front of reporters. The woman spoke first.
“My daughter, Angelina Juliette Barnes, disappeared two days ago. We’re begging the public to come forward with any information that will help find my daughter.”
The man stepped up to the microphone. The text at the bottom of the screen said he was Juliette’s stepdad. “Any information could help,” he added. “We’re offering a reward for any tip that leads to finding her. Angelina is a bright, intelligent young woman. She loves people, running on the beach, and helping others. Please help us.”
Ah-ha! Her disappearance was public now. That meant I could ask Adams about her.
That also explained why her name hadn’t come up when I’d searched for it. Maybe she’d only recently begun to go by Juliette instead of Angelina? I didn’t know. But at least I had something.
I picked up the phone, not willing to waste any more time.
CHAPTER 18
“I just saw the news,” I blathered.
“Okay . . .” Adams responded.
“Riley was representing Juliette Barnes—or, Angelina, as her parents called her. It can’t be a coincidence that Riley was shot and now Juliette has disappeared.”
“I’ve seen plenty of coincidences in my day, Gabby. Sometimes coincidences are just that—random, eerie, odd, but not related.”
“She was snatched from her home, Detective. That’s what her parents said. Was there a picture there?” I already knew the answer. I wanted to hear what he’d say, though.
He paused. “I can’t tell you that.”
But I could read into it all I wanted. “I’ll take that as a yes. Jones was behind this. He didn’t die.”
Adams sighed. “Even if there was a picture, the picture wouldn’t be the smoking gun, Gabby. The fact that Jones left photos at abduction scenes was widely reported on the news.”
“If not Jones, then who?” I wasn’t ready to give up.
“We’re close to an arrest, Gabby. Not only for Juliette, but for Riley.”
“Can’t you give me anything else?”
“No. You just worry about Riley.”
Didn’t he know that worrying about Riley was simultaneous to finding answers?
I thanked the detective and hung up. My curiosity was burning even hotter than before. Who were the police moving in on? What information did they have that I didn’t?
I sighed. Then I opened my door to leave. Maybe I’d stop by Freddy Mansfield’s place again. Maybe I’d visit Juliette’s pastor.
However, my own pastor was standing outside my door, poised to knock. His normal, goofy smile was absent. “Gabby. I’ve been trying to call.”
“Pastor . . . I’ve been busy.” It was the truth; but I’d also been avoiding him.
“I noticed you missed church on Sunday.”
I shrugged, trying to act like it wasn’t a big deal. “I was at the hospital with Riley.”
“Can we talk for a moment?”
I wasn’t ready to be confronted about anything. I was the girl who’d been a skeptic, who’d loved science, who’d denied the possibility of a loving God. When I’d had a change of heart, I’d nearly been the poster child for wham-bam conversion stories. How disappointed would people be if they knew the wham-bam new Christian was wavering? “I was just on my way out, actually.”
“Can I go with you? I promise not to get in your way.”
Where was I going again? My mind went blank. Either way, I had to get out of this. “I don’t know if that’s a good idea.” Hopefully he thought it was because I was visiting a grisly crime scene, not because I was avoiding him.
“I see.”
He continued to stare at me until I finally nodded. Why fight this? I just had to get the conversation over with, even if it meant disappointing people who’d had such high hopes. “Why don’t you come in for a minute? I can wait a second. I just don’t have much time.”
“I’d appreciate it, Gabby.” He stepped inside. “I’ve been worried about you.”
“About me? What’s there to worry about? I’m fine.” Even though my life is falling apart around me. Even though “fine” was a relative term. I sat on my couch and pulled a pillow in front of my chest.
The pastor sat across from me. “You’ve been through a lot, Gabby. It’s okay to admit if you’re struggling.”
“Why would I be struggling? Everything works together for a higher purpose, right?” The words had a bitter edge that I hadn’t expected.
“Even the people I know that have the strongest of faiths often find themselves faced with moments of doubts when tragedies of this magnitude occur. It’s okay to ask God the hard questions. He can handle them. Just don’t turn away from Him.”
I nodded, trying to keep myself together. Who was I worried about disappointing more? God or the people who admired the 180-degree turn I’d done in my life? Why did I even have to ask that question?
I was good at sweeping up clues at crime scenes. The bad guys—and even investigators—left plenty of them behind. I thought I’d done a decent job collecting all the evidence I needed to believe that a Higher Power had created this world around me. But again, I was coming back to the question that had always bugged me. If God was a loving God, why did He allow so much evil and pain?
“Riley’s a good man,” I started. And I still did believe that Riley was a good man, despite his secret relationship of some sort with Juliette. “Riley’s life is still on the line. Meanwhile, a gangbanger who’s probably taken lives and hurt uncountable people is recovering and will probably be fine. I don’t get it, Pastor.”
“I don’t want to give you any clichés, Gabby—”
I shook my head. “No offense, Pastor. But if you don’t want to, then don’t.”
He pressed his lips together before finishing. “But there are certain truths in those familiar sayings. God works in mysterious ways.”
“Well, I wish He’d work in practical ways that were easier to understand.”
“Then our faith would be easy.”
“Why shouldn’t faith be easy?” My voice rose in pitch.
The pastor leaned toward me. “Faith requires us to pick up crosses and abandon the easy for the difficult.”
Tears tried to push forward, but I held them back. Instead, I stood and glanced at my watch. “I wish we could talk more. But I do need to run.”
“I’m worried about you, Gabby. Riley wouldn’t want to see you lose your faith over this. He’d want his life—even in a time like this—to help point people to the truth of God’s word.”
I couldn’t argue with the pastor. He was right. Riley was like that. His faith had been tested. He’d waffled around for a while, but he’d come back even stronger than before.
I hated to admit it, but my questions—the silent accusations that brewed in my mind—probably would let Riley down. I’d told myself that my faith wasn’t because of Riley. Maybe I’d been wrong.
“I’m sorry, Pastor, but I do need to go. I’m not sure what else there is to say.”
“Then how about if I just hang out? You don’t have to say anything.”
I turned and raised my eyebrows. “Really?”
He nodded. “Where are you headed?”
I couldn’t decide if I should smirk or sigh. Instead, I announced, “You might regret this.”
***
I didn’t feel like myself as I drove down the road. It was like a gigantic weight pressed down on me. Not only my shoulders, as some liked to say. The heaviness pressed on my heart and my soul as well. Somehow, voicing those doubts aloud to the pastor had only made me feel melancholy and sorrowful. Maybe the biggest person who’d been let down by my doubts was me.
I pulled up to Lafayette Community Church. My watch showed it was just after four, but I still hoped I could catch the pastor here and ask him questions about Juliette. True to his word, Pastor Shaggy—hi
s real name was Randy, by the way—didn’t talk about spiritual matters. We talked about events coming up at the church, a new restaurant in town, and how the food in the hospital cafeteria was surprisingly good.
When I stopped in the parking lot, Pastor Shaggy sent me a look. “You trying out new churches?”
I shook my head. “I just need to talk to the pastor here. It’s about a case.” I said it as if I was officially investigating or something.
“I see.”
We climbed from my van and tried three different doors at the traditional looking church building until we finally found an entrance that was unlocked. We stepped onto some matted red carpet, glanced down the hall and spotted what appeared to be a reception area.
Maybe it was a good thing Pastor Shaggy was with me. Maybe it would gain me more credibility or maybe the pastor here would be more prone to speak up. We’d see.
A plump secretary greeted us and a few minutes later, we were ushered into a crowded office. Books were stacked everywhere—on the shelves lining two walls, on the desk, on the floor, on a table by the window.
A man in his mid-forties with thinning brown hair sat behind the desk. Everything about him seemed ordinary, except for the trendy glasses he wore. I wondered if he wore them so he could appear to be more in touch or hip than he actually was.
He had an easy smile, one that pulled even harder across his face when he spotted Pastor Shaggy.
“If it isn’t Randy Macintosh.” He reached his hand across the desk, and they exchanged a hearty handshake. “Fancy seeing you here. To what do I owe this honor?”
Randy pointed at me. “This is my friend, Gabby St. Claire.”
He extended his hand to me. “Gabby, I’m Micah. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”
“She has a few questions she was hoping you could answer,” Pastor Shaggy continued.
Micah sat back down. “I’ll do what I can. Fire away.”
I sat in a cheap metal folding chair across from him. “Thank you for your time, and, before I start, I’d like to ask your forgiveness if I come across as hasty. Not to make excuses, but I’ve been under quite a bit of strain lately.”
“Understood.”
“I have questions about Juliette Barnes.”
His grin slipped, and he shook his head solemnly. “Sweet Juliette. We’re all heart broken to hear about what happened. How did you know her?”
“I didn’t know her very well,” I responded. “A friend of mine did, though.” For some reason, I found myself scowling at Pastor Shaggy as I wondered if he knew about Juliette. I hadn’t asked him—yet.
Pastor Shaggy tilted his head, looking totally confused. I was going to have a lot of repenting to do, wasn’t I? The pastor had been nothing but kind to me. I wasn’t sure why I was acting so hostile. I hated when my emotions got the best of me.
Pastor Micah kept his gaze on me. “What do you need to know?”
“I’m doing a little investigating. To be truthful, it’s all unofficial.”
“I appreciate the honesty,” Micah said. He pushed his glasses higher and waited for me.
“A neighbor of Juliette’s said he hadn’t seen her in a while. I was wondering if you knew where she’d been?”
He nodded. “I sure do. She went on a mission trip out in Appalachia with four other members of our congregation. She left on a Monday afternoon and returned that following Sunday.”
That explained her absence. Had she heard about what happened to Riley before she departed? If they were such good friends, I had trouble seeing how she could leave in the midst of such tragedy. There were so many things I didn’t understand about the woman.
“When was the last time you talked to her?” I continued.
He squinted in thought. “We spoke on Tuesday evening.”
“Do you always talk to people in your congregation that often?” The question slipped out before I could stop it. I didn’t dare look at Pastor Shaggy. I was sure he looked horrified.
From the way Pastor Micah winced, I’d either struck a nerve, or he was appalled by my forthrightness. He shifted in his seat. “Juliette and my wife are good friends. Plus, Juliette kept in touch here at the church office about a lot of things she was involved in. She’s very active here and serves on multiple committees. We touched base about an upcoming outreach we have as an alternative to Halloween.”
I licked my lips. “I’m sorry for being so blunt. I just have a lot riding on all of this.”
“You won’t offend me,” Pastor Micah assured me. “Ask your questions. I’m a big boy.”
Gratitude filled me. “Had Juliette been working since she was fired from her job at GCI?”
“She was receiving some unemployment, I believe. Plus, she filled in for us some here at the church doing administrative work. She’d sold some of her things online. She was doing what she could to make it through. She trusted that God would provide for her, and He did.”
“The Lord is good like that,” Pastor Shaggy added.
“That’s right, brother,” Pastor Micah agreed.
I ignored them. “Did she ever talk to you about the lawsuit?”
Micah clasped his hands in front of him. “Some. She was very passionate about what she believed in. Asking her not to talk about God was like discovering the cure for cancer and not telling anyone about it.”
“Was she dating anyone?”
“Not that I know of. We didn’t talk much about that side of her life. Really, she seemed quite content with being single. It afforded her a lot of time to do the Lord’s work.”
While Shaggy tried hard to appeal to people outside of the Christian subculture, it appeared that Micah was content with traditional church lingo. Neither was right or wrong, but I couldn’t help but notice the differences between the two men.
“The Lord’s work, huh?” Is that what she called hanging out with my fiancé?
Micah leaned closer. “You have to understand. Her brother died several years ago in a car accident. It turned her life upside down. She was changed after that. She realized just how short this life could be, and she intended on living every minute to the fullest.”
I nodded, letting that sink in. “Okay.”
“Anything else I can help you with?”
I shook my head. “Not right now. But thank you for your time.”
***
“How do you know Pastor Micah?” I asked as Pastor Shaggy and I walked to the car.
“As a pastor, you get to know other pastors in the area through different events. We’ve talked on occasion. Gotten coffee a few times. It’s really important to me that the churches in our area are united. Micah shares my vision.”
We climbed into my van. “I see.”
I cranked my engine and started my windshield wipers. The rain was light enough to be annoying, but not heavy enough to warrant the wipers. I put the van in drive, but then put it in park again and turned to the pastor.
“Did you know Juliette?”
He shook his head. “I did not.”
“Did Riley ever talk about her to you?”
“He didn’t.”
“So, until today you had no idea who she was?”
“That’s correct.” The pastor turned toward me. “Why is this Juliette bothering you so much? I almost see fear in your gaze.”
“Fear?” I scoffed. “I’m not fearful of Juliette.”
“Then what are you?”
I raked a hand through my hair, trying to find the right answer. “I’m curious. Untrusting. Suspecting.”
“And just what are you curious, untrusting, and suspecting about?”
I moistened my lips quickly and watched the spatters of rain on the windshield. “Riley knew her. He got together with her on more than one occasion. He was representing her in this lawsuit. Yet he never mentioned the woman. My mind jumps to the worst conclusions when I think about his reasoning. I can’t think of a single good one.”
“Do you trust Riley?”
�
��I did.”
“You know Riley. Do you think he would lie to you?”
“But Juliette—”
“This isn’t about Juliette. It’s about Riley. Do you think he would lie to you?”
I thought about it, long and hard. I knew my answer right away; I just wanted to make sure I believed it. “No, I don’t think he would.”
“So you trust him?”
I didn’t want to answer. So I shrugged again. “I guess.”
“Rest in that, Gabby. Worrying about all of those other questions won’t do you any good right now. I’m sure Riley has an explanation.”
“What if I never get it?” My voice cracked. “What if he can’t talk? Or walk? Or he’s in a vegetative state? There are so many unknowns.”
“I don’t want to sound cliché, but we just have to trust God, whatever the future holds. My story doesn’t compare to your present situation. I realize that. But after college, I was actually working as an engineer over at the shipyard.”
“You were an engineer?”
He nodded. “A friend brought me to church and, after that, I knew I wanted to be a minister. I wanted to reach people who were like me—skeptical, uncertain, not sold out on organized religion.”
“Why have I never heard this before?”
“I’ve done sermons on it, but it’s been a while. Maybe before you were at our church. Anyway, I quit my job. I had no money. I had no idea what I was doing. It wasn’t the smartest move on my part. But I got a loan, went and got a degree in biblical studies, and I started the church I’m at now.”
“Bravo to you.” And I meant it. I could imagine that to be a huge leap of faith.
“Sometimes God calls us to foolish things. Sometimes people will look down on us—even fellow believers. Look at Noah. God called him to build an ark in the middle of a desert.”
“So you’re saying that faith can sometimes look irrational?”
“I prefer to call it radical. But yes. It’s like I said earlier—if faith was easy, we’d have no cross to carry.”
To Love, Honor, and Perish Page 15