by Julie Kenner
He appeared to consider that. Finally, he nodded. “True. I’ve never denied that I’m a monster.” He jammed a hand through his ebony hair and sat back in the chair, his emerald eyes unreadable as he took her in. “You’re a terrible housekeeper, Cat. You’re always breaking and misplacing things, and I doubt you even know what a vacuum cleaner is––”
“I’ll do better,” she swore. “I’ll try harder and work longer hours. Please don’t––”
“Let me finish,” he broke in. “Like I said, you’re a terrible housekeeper. But you’re an excellent cook. Zhubaal and Lilliana have watched you with the Unfallen, and they both agree that you’re also a great teacher. You’re eager and enthusiastic, and I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone try as hard as you do to get things right. It’s that quality that led you to fix the mistake you made by letting the human into the Inner Sanctum. I admire your determination, and I like having you around. So no, I won’t kill you. Besides,” he muttered, “Lilliana would mount my head on a pike if I did that.”
Cat sat, stunned. He admired her? Liked having her around? Even more unbelievable, the Grim Reaper was afraid of Lilliana. “I––I don’t understand. What are you going to do to me?”
“Nothing. I think you’ve punished yourself far more than I ever could.” He smiled, barely, but for him, that was huge. “I can hire someone else to clean if you’d rather do other work in Sheoul-gra. Just let Lilliana know, and she’ll arrange it.”
Relief flooded her in such a powerful wave that she nearly fell out of her chair. She could barely function as Azagoth came to his feet in a smooth surge. “I’m glad you’re back, Cataclysm. Lilliana was inconsolable.”
Inconsolable? Warmth joined the flood of relief. Lilliana truly cared about her. Oh, Cat had had friends in Heaven, but no one had worried about her. Okay, sure, they didn’t worry because Heaven was a pretty safe place, but even when she’d gone to work with Gethel, no one had expressed concern. When she’d been found guilty of colluding with a traitor in order to start the Apocalypse, her friends and family had been sad, angry, and embarrassed, but to say that they’d been distraught or inconsolable would be a huge overstatement.
“Thank you,” she said, her voice thick with emotion. “But before you go, can I ask you something?”
He gave a clipped nod. “Ask.”
She cleared her throat, more to buy a little time than to get the sappy emotion out of her voice. “I want something from you.” Azagoth cocked a dark eyebrow, and she revised her statement. “I mean, I would like something from you.”
“And what’s that?”
“Let Hades have some furniture.”
Clearly, Azagoth hadn’t expected that because the other eyebrow joined the first. “Furniture?”
“He’s been sleeping on a hard-ass slab of stone and using scraps of who knows what for other furniture. He made his own playing cards from bits of wood.”
“So?”
She shoved to her feet, ready to go toe-to-toe with him over this. Hades deserved as much. “Don’t you think he’s been punished enough?”
“You know what he did, yes? You know he slaughtered my son?”
“I’m aware,” she said gently...but firmly. “I know that must be painful for you. But I’m also aware that he’s been paying for that for thousands of years.”
Crossing his arms over his broad chest, Azagoth studied her. His green eyes burned right through her, and she wondered what he was searching for. “He wouldn’t ask for these things. So why are you?”
“Because it’s the right thing to do.”
“Is that all?” he asked, and her stomach dropped to her feet. He knew.
“I care for him,” she admitted. “And he deserves better––”
“Than how I’m treating him?”
Oh, hell, no, she wasn’t falling into that trap. “Better than how he currently lives.”
When Azagoth smiled, she let out the breath she didn’t realize she’d been holding. “Fine. He can have whatever he wants for his home.”
She almost pointed out that his home was a damned crypt, but she figured that would be pushing it. So for today, she accepted the victory.
But she wasn’t done. Hades had fought for her, and now it was time for her to do the same for him.
First, though, she had someone to see.
Chapter Seventeen
“Can I talk to you?”
Cat stood in the doorway of Zhubaal’s office in the Unfallen dorms, her stomach churning a little. She really didn’t want to be having this conversation, but curiosity had always been her downfall. Like a real cat.
Zhubaal had been gazing out the window at the courtyard below where several Unfallen were playing a game of volleyball, but now he turned to her, his handsome face a mask of indifference. “About what?”
“I want to know why, ah...” Man, this was awkward. “That day, in your chambers...”
Leaning against the windowsill, he crossed his booted feet at the ankles and hooked his thumbs in his jeans’ pockets. “You want to know why I refused sex with you.”
Her cheeks heated. That had been a seriously humiliating thing. “Yes. Did I do something wrong?”
“You didn’t do anything wrong. I had my reasons.”
She probably shouldn’t ask, but... “Can you tell me those reasons?”
He stood there for a long time, his expression stony, his mouth little more than a grim slash. Finally, when it became clear that he wasn’t going to say anything, she shook her head and started to turn away.
“It’s okay,” she said. “I had no right to ask.”
She headed down the hall, made it about ten steps when he said, “I’m waiting for someone.”
Oh. She pivoted around to him as he stood just outside his office door. “Someone you know? You have a lover? A mate?”
He averted his gaze, and she realized that in all the months she’d known him, this was the first time he’d shown any vulnerability. “Not exactly.”
Not wanting to ruin the moment, she took a few slow, careful steps toward him, approaching the way she might a feral dog. “Did...did Azagoth warn you to stay away from me?”
“No.”
That seemed strange, given that he’d read Hades the riot act. “Why not?”
Gaze still locked on the floor, he replied, “Because he knows about my vow.”
“What vow?”
“That,” he said, his head snapping up, “is none of your business.
Touchy. But now she was curious. What kind of vow? She recalled his interactions with the resident Unfallen and all the visitors to the realm and realized that she’d never once seen Zhubaal with a female.
“Are you gay?”
He snorted. “Hardly.”
Come to think of it, she’d never seen him with a male, either. So what was his deal? He was waiting for someone...someone specific? Was his vow––
She inhaled sharply. “You...you’re a virgin, aren’t you? You rejected me out of honor.”
His gaze narrowed, and his lips twisted into a nasty sneer. “Do not confuse my lack of sexual experience with innocence or kindness, and especially not honor. Not when you tried to use me to rid yourself of your own virginity.”
“I didn’t know. I’m sorry. I’ll just go now. But Zhubaal...I hope you find whoever it is you’re waiting for.”
As she hurried away, she swore she heard a soft, “I hope so, too.”
* * * *
Zhubaal watched Cat disappear around a corner, his heart heavy, his body numb. She had been his single moment of weakness, the only one in nearly a century.
It had been ninety-eight years since his beloved angel, Laura, had been cast out of Heaven. Ninety-eight years of searching for her in Sheoul and getting his own Heavenly boot in the ass in the process.
Cat had come to him in a moment of weakness, on a day when he’d despaired that he’d never find Laura. But even as he’d kissed Cat, touched her, started to undress her, Laura
had filled his thoughts.
As young angels, he and Laura had made a blood-pact to be each other’s firsts, and he’d kept that vow, even after she lost her wings. He’d searched for her, eventually losing his own wings, but still, he remained faithful. And then, even after he discovered that she’d been slaughtered by an angel, he’d held onto that pact like a toddler with his comfy blankie. After all, her soul had been sent to Sheoul-gra, and he’d figured he could find her there, even if he had to get himself killed to do it.
At least they’d have been together in the Inner Sanctum.
But fate had intervened in the form of Azagoth, who had needed a new assistant, which gave Zhubaal access to privileged information about the residents of the Inner Sanctum.
Then fate threw him a curve ball.
He was too late.
Laura had, indeed, been a resident of the Inner Sanctum’s 1st Ring. Until Azagoth reincarnated her thirty years ago.
Pain stabbed Zhubaal in the chest. His Laura was out there somewhere. She was a different person with a different name, but she was still his, and he wouldn’t break his vow until he found her.
Unfortunately, he was now bound to Azagoth with a vow just as binding as the one he’d made with Laura. He could leave Sheoul-gra, but only for a few hours at a time, which made searching for Laura––or whatever name she went by now–– next to impossible. Especially since Azagoth refused to give any specifics regarding her status, her parents, or even her species.
As a fallen angel, she should have been born only to a fallen angel to become either emim or vyrm, but Z had learned long ago that there were very few rules that couldn’t be broken. For all he knew, his Laura could be feeding on offal and lurking in garbage piles as a Slogthu demon.
The big question was whether or not he’d recognize her. Surely their bond had been strong enough that he could see his Laura in whoever she’d become. And if she’d had the rare good luck of retaining her soul-memory, she could remember bits of her previous life. If so, she might even be searching for him.
Sighing, he went back inside his office, but he didn’t feel like working anymore. He wanted to be out in the world, scouring the realms for Laura. He was a fool and he knew it, but dammit, he’d made a vow, and even if he couldn’t have the angel he’d fallen in love with, he wasn’t going to break the pact with someone he didn’t love. He’d hurt Cat, and he felt a little bad about that, but he hadn’t loved her. Cat deserved better. Laura deserved better.
He wasn’t sure what he deserved, but he knew what he wanted.
He was just losing faith that he’d ever get it.
Chapter Eighteen
Cat spent the next two days plotting ways to convince Azagoth to lighten up on Hades. Lilliana had volunteered to help, and Cat gladly took her up on her offer. The trick, Lilliana said, would be to make him think it was his idea. As Cat had suspected, he could be incredibly thick-skulled when it came to certain things, like offering second chances.
She opened the door to her apartment, intent on paying Lilliana a visit. But instead of facing an empty hall, she found herself standing mere inches away from Hades. Heart pounding with surprise and excitement, she stared.
“Hades,” she gasped. God, he looked good, so good he stole her breath. Wearing nothing but form-fitting, color-shifting pants and black boots, he filled the doorway, his massive shoulders nearly touching the doorframe. “What are you doing here? You’ll get in trouble––”
He was on her in an instant. His mouth came down on hers as he swept her into his arms, crushing her against him. His hand came up to tangle in her hair, holding her in place for the erotic assault. Forbidden, shivery excitement shot through her, and her core went molten.
“I don’t care,” he said against her lips. “I need you. I burn for you.”
She moaned, her heart soaring at his words as he pushed her toward the bed. But as her knees hit the mattress and they both fell onto the soft covers, she wedged her hands between them and pushed him off.
“I can’t,” she said, and oh, how it hurt to say that. “I can’t watch you suffer because of me.”
Hades cupped her cheek in his warm palm. “I was going to go to Azagoth first, but I know him. He’ll say no.”
“All the more reason to not do this.” She heard the sound of the plea in her voice, the weakness in the face of Hades’s desire. She needed to be stronger, but she wanted him so badly she shook with the force of it.
He leaned forward and brushed his lips across hers in a feathery, tender kiss. “All the more reason to do it. How does that old saying go? Better to seek forgiveness than ask permission from some asshole who’s going to tell you no?”
Damn him, this wasn’t funny. “Hades––”
“Shh.” He silenced her with another kiss. This one deeper. Harder. “Just this once, Cat,” he murmured. “I need this to hold onto when I’m alone at night.”
She might have argued some more. She might have shoved him away. She might have done a lot of things if he hadn’t slid his thick thigh between her legs as he untied her corset and freed her breasts. If he hadn’t dipped his head to take one aching nipple into his mouth.
“Hades,” she moaned.
He opened his mouth fully over her breast, his hot breath flowing over her skin as he worked the buttons of her jeans. His tongue teased her as he dragged it low, under the swell of her breast before laving attention on the other one.
Against her thigh, she felt his immense arousal pressing into her, a hot, unyielding presence that she’d never felt in the one place she needed it to be. Arching, she twisted so his erection settled between her legs, but her damned jeans and his pants––
As if Hades was thinking the same thing, he reared up and made fast work of removing her pants. “I love that you don’t wear shoes,” he said, his voice all breathless and needy. “Nothing to catch your jeans on.”
He tossed them to the floor, kicked off his boots, and then stripped away his own clothing, leaving him beautifully, gloriously, naked. His cock jutted upward from the plump sac between his legs, the broad head glistening at the tip. Unbidden, her hand reached out, but he seized her wrists and pinned them over her head as he stretched his body over hers.
“Not yet,” he said as he nuzzled her neck. “If you touch me, I’m a goner. Embarrassing, but true.”
Okay, she’d let him off the hook. For now. But later, she wanted to touch him. Smell him. Taste him. She had a lot to learn, and she was going to use whatever time they had wisely.
“There you go,” he murmured. “Relax. Close your eyes. I’ll make this good for you.”
Relax, huh? It was weird how her body felt wound tight and liquid at the same time. In the dark behind her eyelids, she imagined the expression on his face as he kissed his way down her body.
His tongue circled her navel, and the tightness ramped up a notch. Anticipation made her squirm, but he put a lid on that quick, clamping down on her hips to force her into blissful submission. Her limited ability to move jacked up the intensity of every sensation until she was clawing at the bedspread and silently begging him to make her come.
But no, Hades was indeed a master of torture, and he took his time scooting lower, his tongue trailing along her abdomen and skimming her mound. She jerked upward, her body instinctively following his mouth as he kissed the crease of her leg.
“You okay?” His voice was a deep, sexy growl that sent stabs of pleasure shooting through every nerve ending.
“Uh-huh,” was all she could manage.
He chuckled as he spread her legs and settled between them. The brush of his hair against the sensitive skin of her inner thighs made her hiss in pleasure, and then that soft, prickly Mohawk shifted, finding her center. She moaned as Hades bobbed his head up and down between her legs.
“Oh...my,” she breathed. “How...naughty.”
He nodded, sending a silky caress over her sex. “There is no part of me that can’t bring you pleasure,” he purred, th
e vibration adding to the amazing sensations that cascaded over her in an erotic wave.
His hands slid up and down her legs, circling her ankles and tickling her calves as he brushed his hair over her sex in slow, decadent sweeps. Tension built, a writhing knot of need that grew hotter with every erotic bob of his head. She needed more, and he knew because his head came up and his tongue came out and her eyes went wide when she realized what he was about to do.
“Yes, please,” she whispered.
With a raw, erotic curse, he spread her with his thumbs and dipped his head. His mouth met her core, engulfing her in heat as his hot breath fanned the flames. She cried out at the first tentative touch of his tongue. The tip flicked whisper-light over her oh-so-ready knot of nerves before he used the flat of his tongue to lick all of her at once, from core to clit.
She fell back with a strangled moan and drove her fingers through his silky hair to hold him there, to keep him doing exactly what he was doing so perfectly. He lapped at her, starting with long, lazy licks before changing up and swirling his tongue between her folds. But when he pushed his tongue inside her and curled it firmly as he pulled back, she bucked so hard he had to pin her with his hands on her thighs so he could do it again.
Relentlessly, he drove his tongue inside her and licked his way back out, over and over, until the steam building up inside her exploded. The orgasm he’d given her in the shower had been amazing, but this...this made her not only see stars, but join them. The supernova of ecstasy sent her hurtling into the heavens––where she’d never felt like this.
The pleasure rolled over her in great waves, and just when she thought it was over, Hades did something with his fingers and tongue that sent her spiraling out of control again. She heard a distant shout...his name. She’d screamed his name...
Somewhere deep inside her it occurred to her that someone might have heard, but as Hades brought her back to Earth with a series of gentle, slow licks, the danger they faced slipped away until all that was left was the big male prowling back up her body, his lips glistening, his eyes smoldering with the promise that there was more to come.