“I found a great apartment in Greenwich Village overlooking Washington Square Park,” he said. “It has three bedrooms and it’s close to the subway.”
Sabine took a large sip of her wine. Here we go, she thought. “I thought you liked your apartment,” she said, playing dumb. “Getting tired of living at the Ritz-Carlton?”
Gavin frowned. “What? No. Not for me. For you. I’d prefer you to be closer to me, but I know you’d rather live downtown. You work in SoHo, right? You could easily walk to work from this apartment.”
Walking to work. She wouldn’t even allow herself to fantasize about a life without a long train commute each day. Or three bedrooms where she didn’t have to share with Jared. “I’m pretty sure it’s out of my budget.”
Gavin set his wine down on the coffee table. “I told you I wanted to help. Let me buy you an apartment.”
“And I told you I wanted to take this slowly. I probably couldn’t even afford the maintenance fee, much less the taxes or the mortgage itself. Homeowner’s insurance. The utilities on a place that large would be through the roof.”
He turned in his seat to face her, his serious businessman expression studying her. “How much is your rent here?”
“Gavin, I—”
He interrupted her with a number that was fewer than fifty dollars off the mark.
“Yes, pretty much,” she admitted, reluctantly.
“Tack on a couple hundred for utilities and such. So what if I bought an apartment and rented it to you for the same amount you’re paying now? That would be fair, right? You wouldn’t have to worry about all the fees associated with owning the place.”
She did have to admit that she preferred this idea. If she had to pay rent, she would continue working. She liked her job and wanted to keep doing it. But a three-bedroom apartment in the Village for the price of what she paid for a tiny place beyond the reach of the subway lines? That was insanity.
“That’s a ridiculous suggestion. My rent is less than a tenth of what the mortgage on that kind of apartment would be.”
Gavin shrugged. “I’m not concerned. You could live there rent-free for all I care. I just thought you would feel more comfortable if you contributed.”
“There’s a difference between helping us out and buying us a multimillion-dollar apartment.”
“I want you close,” he said. His dark eyes penetrated hers with an intensity that made her squirm slightly with a flush rising to her pale cheeks. Did he really mean her?
Sabine opened her mouth to argue, but he held up his hand to silence her protest. “I mean,” he corrected, “living in Manhattan will make it easier to handle the custody arrangements and trade-offs. When he starts at his new school, he would be closer. It would be safer. More convenient for everyone.”
Just as she thought. He wanted Jared close, not her. At least not for any reason more than the occasional booty call. “Especially for you,” she snapped, irritably.
“And you!” he added. “If I got things my way, the two of you would just move in with me. That’s certainly the cheapest option, since you seem so concerned about how much I spend, but I thought you would like having your own space better.”
She must seem like the most ungrateful person on the planet, but she knew what this was. A slippery slope. He would push, push, push until he had things just the way he wanted them. If he wanted them—or Jared, she should say—living with him, eventually he would. This apartment in the Village would just be a pit stop to make it look as if he was being reasonable.
“I know it’s a pain for you to drive all the way out here every time you want to see Jared. And I know that you and I just...” Her voice trailed off.
“Had sex?” he offered.
“Yes,” she said with a heavy sigh. “But that doesn’t change anything between us or about the things we’ve already discussed. We’re not moving at all. Not in with you and not into that apartment. It sounds nice, but it’s too soon. When we’re ready, perhaps we could look together. I’d like some say in the decision, even if you’re writing the checks. I’m pretty sure the place I pick will be significantly cheaper.”
“I’m not concerned with the cost of keeping my child happy and safe.”
A painful twinge nagged at Sabine right beneath her sternum. She should be happy the father of her child was willing to lay out millions for the health and welfare of their child. But a part of her was jealous. He was always so quick to point out that this was about their son. Each time he mentioned it, it was like he was poking the gaping wound of her heart with a sharp stick. She would benefit from the arrangement, but none of this was about her. The sex didn’t change anything, just like it didn’t change anything three years ago. He was attracted to her, but she was not his priority and never was.
“Thank you,” she choked out. “I appreciate that you’re so willing to create a stable, safe home for our son. Let’s give it a week to sink in, all right? We’ve got a lot of hurdles to jump before we add real estate to the mix.”
Gavin eyed her for a moment before silently nodding. Sabine knew this was anything but a victory. She was only pushing off the inevitable. He would get his way eventually.
He always did.
* * *
When Gavin arrived at Dr. Peterson’s office at 10:00 a.m. Monday morning, Sabine was already there. She was lost in a fashion magazine and didn’t notice him come in. “Morning,” he said.
Sabine looked up and gave him a watery smile. “Hey.” She looked a little out of sorts. Maybe she was nervous. Things would change after this and she probably knew it.
“Where’s Jared?” he asked.
The smile faded. She slung the magazine she’d been reading onto the seat beside her. “At school, where he belongs. I’m sorry to disappoint, but you’re stuck with me today.”
He’d screwed up last night, he could tell. Not in seducing her—that would never be a bad idea—but in forcing the idea of the apartment on her. Anyone else would jump at the offer, but to her, it was him imposing on her. Demanding they be closer so he could see his son more easily. Not once mentioning that he’d like her closer as well because that opened the door to dangerous territory.
Sabine was skittish. She scared off easily last time. He wasn’t about to tell her that he wanted to see her more because he was still fighting himself over the idea of it. He was usually pretty good at keeping his distance from people, but he’d already let Sabine in once. Keeping her out the second time was harder than he expected. Especially when he didn’t want to. He wanted her in his bed. Across from him at a nice restaurant. Certainly he could have that and not completely lose himself to her.
“That’s scarcely a hardship,” he said, seating himself in the empty chair beside her. “I find your company to be incredibly...stimulating.”
Sabine crossed her arms over her chest and smothered a snort of disbelief. “Well, you’ll be stimulating yourself from now on. Last night was—”
“Awesome?” he interjected. Their physical connection could never be anything less.
“A mistake.”
“Sometimes a mistake can be a happy accident. Like Jared, a happy accident.”
Her moss-green eyes narrowed at him. “And sometimes it’s just a mistake. Like sleeping with your ex when you’re in the middle of a custody negotiation.”
Gavin nodded and leaned into her, crossing his own arms. She really thought last night was a mistake? He hadn’t picked up on it at the time. She was probably just worried it would give him the upper hand somehow. Knowing just how to touch a woman was always an advantage, but he didn’t intend to use that knowledge against her. At least outside the bedroom.
“So I suppose you’ve got no business going to dinner with me tonight, either.”
Her gaze ran over his face, trying to read into his motives. “Listen, Gavin,” she started with a shake of her head. “I know I told you that I wanted you to put in quality time with Jared, but that doesn’t mean you have to come see hi
m every day. I know you’ve got a company to run and a life in progress before all this came out. I only meant that you had to keep your promises and make an effort.”
She thought this was about Jared. Apparently he had not made it abundantly clear how badly he wanted her last night. Their tryst on the couch was nice, but it was just an appetizer to take the edge off three years apart. He wouldn’t allow himself to fall for Sabine, but he wasn’t going to deny himself the pleasure of making love to her. “Who said anything about Jared? I was thinking about you and me. Someplace dark and quiet with no kid’s menu.”
“That sounds lovely,” she said, “but Jared isn’t a puppy. We can’t just crate him while we go out.”
“I can arrange for someone to watch him.”
A flicker of conflict danced across her face. She wanted to go. He could tell. She was just very protective and worried about leaving their son with a stranger. Hell, she hadn’t even wanted to leave Jared with him.
“Someone? You don’t even know who?”
“Of course I do. I was actually considering my secretary, Marie. She’s got a new grandson of her own that she fawns over, but he lives in Vermont, so she doesn’t see him nearly as much as she wants to. I asked her this morning if she was willing to watch Jared tonight. She’ll even come out to your apartment so you don’t have to pack up any of his things and he can sleep in his own bed when the time comes.”
Sabine pursed her lips in thought and flipped her ponytail over her shoulder. “So you were so confident that I would go to dinner with you that you arranged a babysitter before you even bothered to ask if I wanted to go.”
Her dream last night had tipped her hand. “Your subconscious doesn’t lie.”
Her cheeks flushed red against her pale complexion. She turned away from him and focused her attention on the television mounted on the opposite wall of the waiting room. “What if I have plans?”
“Do you have plans?” he asked.
“No,” she admitted without facing him. “But that’s not the point. You assume too much. You assume that just because we have a child together and we went too far last night that I want—”
“Brooks!” The nurse opened the side door and called out their name to come back.
Sabine’s concerned expression faded, the lines disappearing between her brows. She seemed relieved to avoid this conversation. He wasn’t going to let her off that easily.
“To be continued,” Gavin said, looking her square in the eye. She met his gaze and nodded softly.
He climbed to his feet and offered his hand to help Sabine up. They made their way back to Dr. Peterson’s personal office and sat in the two guest chairs across from his desk. It didn’t take long before his physician strolled in with a file in his hands.
Dr. Peterson eased into his seat and flipped open the paperwork. His gaze ran over it for a moment before he nodded. In that brief flash of time, Gavin had his first flicker of doubt. Jared looked just like him. There was no real reason to believe he wasn’t his son, but Sabine had seemed nervous in the lobby. He didn’t know anything for certain until the doctor told him the results. He hadn’t even wanted a son a week ago, and now he would be devastated to know Jared wasn’t his.
“Well,” the doctor began, “I’ve got good news for you, Mr. Brooks. It appears as though you’re a father. Congratulations,” he said, reaching across the desk to shake his hand.
“Thank you,” Gavin replied with relief washing over him.
Dr. Peterson pulled out two manila envelopes and handed one to each of them. “Here’s a copy of the DNA report for each of you to give your lawyers.”
This apparently was not the doctor’s first paternity test rodeo. “Thank you,” he said, slipping the envelope into his lapel pocket.
“Let me know if you have any questions. Good luck to you both.” Dr. Peterson stood, ushering them out the door.
They were back in the lobby of the building before they spoke again. Gavin turned to her as she was putting the envelope into her purse. “Now about that dinner. You never answered me.”
Sabine looked up at him. She didn’t have the relieved expression he was expecting. She seemed even more concerned than she had going in. “Not tonight, Gavin. I’m not much in the mood for that.”
“What’s the matter?” he asked. Some women would be leaping with joy to have scientific evidence that their child was the heir to a multibillion-dollar empire. Sabine was a notable exception. “This was your idea,” he reminded her.
She sighed. “I know. And I knew what the results would be, but I wasn’t prepared for the finality of it. It’s done. Now the wheels start turning and the child that has been one hundred percent mine for the past two years will start slipping from my arms. It’s selfish of me, I know, and I apologize, but that doesn’t make me leap for joy.”
Gavin turned to face her, placing his hands reassuringly on her shoulders. It gave her no real choice but to look at him. “Sabine, what can I possibly say to convince you that this isn’t a bad thing?”
Her pale green eyes grew glassy with tears she was too stubborn to shed in front of him. “There’s nothing you can say, Gavin. Actions speak louder than words.”
Fair enough. “How about this,” he offered. “I’ll get Edmund to start the paperwork and put together a custody proposal for you to look over. When you’re happy with it, we’ll share a nice dinner, just the two of us, to celebrate that the sky didn’t fall and things will be fine.”
Her gaze dropped to his collar and she nodded so slightly, he could barely tell she’d agreed. “Okay,” she whispered.
“Clear your schedule for Friday night,” he said with confidence. “I have a feeling we’re going to be sharing a lovely candlelit dinner together before the weekend arrives.”
* * *
Sabine curled up on the couch and watched Gavin and Jared play on the living room floor. They were stacking Duplo blocks. Gavin was trying to build a plane, but Jared was determined to make a truck and kept stealing pieces off the clunky blue-and-red jet. It was amazing to see them together, the father and his tiny toddler clone.
It made her smile, even when she wasn’t sure she should be smiling.
Gavin had done his best to reassure her that things would be fine. His lawyer had presented a very reasonable custody agreement. Her relief at reading the briefing was palpable. They were both giving a little and taking a little, which surprised her. Gavin got Jared on alternate weekends, rotating holidays and two weeks in the summer, but he would continue to reside primarily with Sabine. Her concession was to agree to move to Manhattan to make the arrangement easier on everyone.
They’d built in flexibility in the agreement to accommodate special requests, like birthdays. Unless Gavin pushed her, she intended to let him see Jared as often as he liked. How could she turn away a scene like the one playing out on her floor?
Tonight, they were telling Jared that Gavin was his father. It was a big moment for them. The DNA test had made it certain, but telling Jared made it real.
“Hey, big guy?” Gavin said.
Jared dropped a block and looked up. “Yep?”
“Do you know what a daddy is?”
Sabine leaned forward in her seat, resting her elbows on her knees. She agreed to let Gavin be the one to tell him, but she wasn’t certain how much Jared would understand. He was still so young.
“Yeah,” he said cheerfully, before launching into another of his long-winded and unintelligible speeches. Jared was a quiet child, slow to speak, although it seemed more that he didn’t have a lot he wanted to say. Only in the past few months had he started rattling on in his own toddler-speak. From what pieces she could pick out, he was talking about his friend at school whose daddy picked him up every day. Then he pointed at Sabine. “Mommy.”
“Right.” Gavin smiled. “And I am your daddy.”
Jared cocked his head to the side and wrinkled his nose. He turned to Sabine for confirmation. “Daddy?”
S
he let out the breath she’d been holding to nod. “Yeah, buddy. He’s your daddy.”
A peculiar grin crossed Jared’s face. It was the same expression he made when she “stole” his nose and he wasn’t quite sure he believed her. “Daddy?” He pointed at Gavin.
Gavin nodded, having only a moment to brace himself before his son launched into his arms.
“Daddy!” he proclaimed.
Sabine watched Gavin hold his son as fiercely as if someone were going to snatch him away. She understood how he felt. And then she saw the glassy tears in the eyes of her powerful CEO, and her chest tightened with the rush of confusing emotions. It hadn’t taken long, but Gavin was completely in love with his son.
She couldn’t help but feel a pang of jealousy.
Seven
“Damn you for always being right.”
Gavin stood on Sabine’s doorstep holding a bouquet of purple dahlias. She had opened the door and greeted him that way, stealing his “hello” from his lips. Fortunately she was smiling, so he did the same.
He held out the bundle of flowers with the nearly black centers that faded to bright purple tips. “These are for you. They reminded me of your hair.”
Sabine brought the flowers up to her nose and delicately inhaled their scent. “They’re beautiful, thank you.”
“So are you,” he added. And he meant it. She looked lovely tonight. She was wearing a fitted white dress with brightly colored flowers that looked like one of her watercolor paintings. It was sleeveless and clung to every curve of her body.
She smiled, wrinkling her nose with a touch of embarrassment. The movement caught the light on the tiny pink rhinestone in her nose. It was the same bright color as her lipstick and the chunky bracelet on her wrist. “Let me put these in some water and we can go.”
Gavin nodded and stepped across the threshold into the apartment. It was Friday night and as predicted, they were having dinner. Everything had gone smoothly. The paperwork had been filed in family court to add Gavin’s name to the birth certificate. Along with the addition, Jared’s last name would be updated to Brooks. He’d suggested making Jared’s middle name Hayes, but she said the name Thomas was more important to her. He’d thought Sabine would pitch a fit on the subject of Jared’s name, but it hadn’t concerned her.
His Lover's Little Secret Page 8