by Amy Brent
“I am in the very same place Kate. I am lost.” He ran a hand through his hair. “I can’t stop thinking about you, or wanting you. Everything I do is about you and yet I am torn because I know you deserve more, and better. I’m a much older man Kate, I am not like the guys you are used to.”
“I am leaving in the morning, how am I supposed to do that?” She blinked at him rapidly. How do I go off and live a new life and never think about this?”
“I don’t know Kate, there is no right or wrong answer. I just don’t know anything.”
“I’m going to bed.” She whispered it. Giving him a glance as she went.
It couldn’t have been more than an hour before she made her way to his bedroom. She was no fool, and neither was he. He didn’t say a word, instead he simple pulled the covers back for her as she stripped down and climbed in beside him.
There was a tenderness to how he touched her that hadn’t been there before then. He moaned into her mouth as he kissed her. Loving every inch of her as he went. She met him with ever kiss, touch or thrust that he gave. She prided herself on being what he needed, even if she didn’t know what it was she was doing.
His hands touched every inch of her leaving nothing un touched, or unloved. She was smiling when she finally woke up, the sun beating down on the empty bed, where he had once been. She felt the spot, wishing he were still there with her, and leaning over she grabbed one of his pillows, burying her face in it and breathing in his scent. She wanted to remember that smell as she went on with her life.
She showered and dressed, putting the last few things she would need into a travel case and making her way downstairs to the front door. She knew he would be waiting, and as their eyes met she blushed profusely.
“I guess it’s time.” She gave him a half smile.
“Don’t go Kate. I don’t want you to go any more than you want to go. We can figure it out somehow, just not publicly that’s all.”
She knew he was sincere, but what she needed was to be herself, and take some time to figure things out. She knew after the shoot next week, she would have a lot of down time and she would use it to think long and hard about the next phase of her life.
“I can’t … not like this Aaron… not like this.”
She felt his arms pulled her close his lips finding hers. She kissed him deep and he smiled at her response to him, though his face fell when she picked up her bag once more.
“I want us to be who we are. I don’t care about what you or anyone else things. I like what I like and I want you. I just don’t want to hide from it, or from anyone else for that matter. I have a lot on my mind and a lot to think about. Goodbye Aaron.” She said it with such finality that she was quickly gone, and she didn’t turn around to look back, fearful he would see the tears that were streaming down her face.
The trip to the airport was quick, but the wait to board the place was another matter altogether. She had more than enough time to pace the lobby, fighting with herself not to get in a cab and go back, throwing herself into his arms. Finally, she boarded and as the plane flew she looked down at the city below, wondering if he were thinking about her as well. She needed to focus, get her head straight about life.
She was still lost in her own thoughts when she landed safely in L.A. Everything from this moment forward was about her and her future. Perhaps Aaron was right, she needed time to focus on something different. She found her hotel, and she marveled at how well done everything was. Her photographer was there within hours setting up for the shoot, and she found herself fraped in some of the most expensive clothing she was sure she ever will touch.
They had two more full days for shooting, and though Aaron tried to call her a number of times, she hit the ignore button. She knew he would reel her back in, and do his best to tell her to fly back home to him. But she couldn’t be what he wanted, no matter how hard she may try.
Chapter Six
It had been three weeks. Three long and lonely miserable weeks. She missed him, there was no way she could ever deny that, no matter what she told herself. She had taken on three more jobs, and was set up financially for quite some time. Her days were spent at the pool, and roaming the hotel for things to do. That was her life, the life of a maid model, up until now.
She wanted to cry, or scream or anything else for that matter. She held up the stick to check it once more, hoping it would say something different but it was no sue, she was very definitely pregnant. She knew Aaron would feel strongly about it one way or another, but she was her own person, and she made her own rules about what she wanted. She would keep this baby and love it with everything she had, just as she did the father of the child.
Sighing she knew her hat with him tonight would be hard. Some part of her wanted to be excited, but she would have to see how he feels first. As she picked up her phone she dialed him, waiting for the husky timbre of his voice on the other end.
“Kate, I have been waiting for you.” She could hear that he was perturbed.
“I’m sorry if I kept you too long.” She frowned.
“You are just fine Kate; it’s just been a long day. Someone brought in 5 kids to the shipping station, and they were everywhere. The parents were negligent, and the whole thing was a mess. I am telling you it was exactly why I am so glad I don’t have kids.”
She felt his words like weight in her stomach. “I see, well you have had quite a day then.”
They talked about the house, changes that needed to be done, and he told her he missed her, and wished she were there. She sent him love as well, hanging up without saying a word about the issue at hand. He had clearly said he was so happy he had no kids. She put a protective hand over her stomach, she would have to take it all on alone, it was as simple as that. She did her best to stick to her plan, trying to separate herself from Aaron more and more. She knew he had to be seeing that woman again, there was no way he was sitting at home pining away for her, though she wanted him too.
The days went by quickly and she did her best to stay focused and busy, booking more jobs as show went, knowing that soon she wouldn’t be able to work anymore. Her belly would be a clear indicator that she was far less suited to model than other things.
She started shopping more, picking out little things at first and then bigger ones, until she was sure she had too much of everything. She pulled her money out of savings, finding a small two-bedroom house where they could stay for a long time. She saw her phone ringing once more, seeing Aarons face and she decided to answer it this time.
“Hello Aaron.” She said it with a smile.
“Dammnit Kate, where the hell have you been? I’ve been worried sick about you.” She could hear that he was worried, but she knew distance was for the best.
“I am sorry Aaron, things have just been crazy here, I feel like all I do is work work work.” She laughed lightly into the phone.
“Kate listen to me, please don’t disappear on me. I worry about you. Hell, I think about you all the time. At least check in with me one or twice a week.”
“Ok I will.” She could give him that much, he deserved that much.
As the months went by, she slowly put together her new life. She took on new classes, getting ready for the baby, she set up her house and she got bigger and bigger. L.A. was no place to be raising a child, but she really had no place else to go. She certainly couldn’t go back home, to him. She felt the loneliness settle on her like a blanket and she did her best to go out and make some new friends.
Her talks with Aaron were so random, she started looking forward to their chats about the weather, or the newest things popping up in town. He gave her strength when she was afraid she was losing all sense of direction where the bay was concerned. He told her she was beautiful, and smart and he loved all the pictures she sent him. She never asked about the blonde woman, and he never asked her if she was dating either.
By the time she was 6 months pregnant she was far too overwhelmed with everything and she took time
away from school to focus on the baby. She would chat with Aaron for hours, doing her best to keep from breaking down and telling him everything. They talked about everything under the sun, and she fell in love with him even more with every conversation. With those conversations she would feel the pain of losing him all over again and she made the decision to stop talking to him altogether.
It was by far the hardest thing she had ever had to do up to that point. Everything she did, made her want to call and tell him about it. But she would pick up the phone cradle it for a moment and then put it back down. She sent him and email, telling him she needed some alone time. She simply chalked it up to getting too emotionally attached to him. She also told him she wished him well, hopeful that he would meet someone who could be what he needed.
Once the letter was complete she wiped away her tears, and said a sweet goodbye to him in her head and heart. She rubbed her protruding belly, knowing that soon enough she wouldn’t be lonely anymore. She was both terrified and excited, though she knew she could take on any challenge she was given at this point. She blocked him from contacting her, knowing it was the only way she could function. She didn’t want to see anything from him, knowing that her love for him was deep and she would likely give him whatever he asked for.
Her last checkup was a long one and she watched the baby on the screen look back at her and she felt her heart explode. Everything was good, the baby was fine and she could rest easy knowing that when the baby came, she would be find and happy. After her appointment she made her way home, carrying what little groceries she could manage in with her to her house. She had just put everything down on the table when she heard a knock at the door.
She opened the door, and she found herself face to face with him.
Chapter Seven
He glared at her, never taking his eyes off her face. She swallowed hard, her instinct to run and hide but instead she held her ground, and she waited.
“What the hell was that email Kate?” He was beside her then, his eyes roaming her face.
“I had to say goodbye Aaron, I just do, obviously.” She glanced down and he did the same.
She felt his emotions as he reacted differently for a few moments. He was confused, terrified, and concerned all at the same time and she saw him back up, leaning against the back of the door for support.
“Kate… you are pregnant.” He told her as if he was giving her the news himself and she had to smile slightly at that.
“I am well aware of that Aaron.” She rubbed her protruding stomach slightly.
She watched his face change a number of times before he walked a few feet away and then come back to her.
“I’m sorry Aaron, I know I should have told you. Actually I tried to tell you.” She bit her lip.
He looked at her incredulously, “Kate, this is a big deal.”
“I know Aaron, it is. You made it clear you didn’t want any part of kids, you even said you were glad you didn’t have any.” She stood up taller, then spun around to go inside the house.
“You can’t be serious Kate?” He said it barely as a whisper, following her inside.
“Listen, Aaron. We are fine, more than fine. I have this place, enough money to last the year and I’ve been stocking up on things he will need.” She gestured towards the room closest to the living area.
“He?” Aaron was in front of her now, his hand gently as he touched her swollen stomach. His eyes met hers and she felt tears well up once more.
“Yes he, it’s a boy.” She let one tear slip and suddenly she was in his arms again. He kissed her gently, her face, mouth and eyelids. He pulled away and she saw tears in his eyes too.
“Kate, I say a lot of things. I am a grumpy old man sometimes but never, ever would I not want a child of my own. This child is a product of us, and of love. Don’t ever keep anything like this from me again, please.”
The tears fell freely down her face. There was a sense of relief as she felt some of the weight that she had been carrying lifted off her shoulders as he held her. There was no doubt that she wouldn’t be alone.
“There is one more thing though.” He started, turning around to face her. “I know exactly why you left, and what concerned you. I know you want us to be us, and not care about how it looks to the world around us. I get all of that now, when you left everything changed. Life was bleak and sad and I realized that I missed you as I would the woman I love. I don’t see you as a child Kate, instead you are so much more to me than that.”
He moved back from her slightly, pulling something from his jacket. “I had a plan, a dinner some place fancy with candles. I wanted to put this in a glass of champagne and let you find it yourself. I wanted to declare my love for you to the crowd around us, and make a spectacle of ourselves. That being said, I want you to clearly understand that I came here for this, because I love you and for no other reason.”
He knelt down opening the box, showing her a ring that brought tears to her eyes.
“Oh my God Aaron.” She whispered, the tears steadily streaming down her face.
“Kate, will you, and our son, marry me and make me the happiest man in the world?” He waited as she shook her head yes, he pushed the ring onto her hand. Soon she was enveloped in a hug where he gently kissed her all over her face.
She knew things would be better, and she was finally happy.
One Year Later….
If anyone had told her what labor would be like, she would have foregone having kids at all. She was thinking it as she lay basking in the afternoon sun, she draped a hand gently on her stomach, smiling as she thought about the irony of that statement. Aaron would likely lose his mind a little over the announcement of another baby, but since Jack was born he had done nothing but smile.
She was only 2 months now, so he was clueless about it, but she would tell him soon. She enjoyed her afternoon away from the boys but soon she was perfumed and ready for him to come home.
He found her that way, draped across the bed, naked. Her massive breasts full and eager to please him. She knew what he liked and made sure she was doing all of it when he walked in the door. She had bought a new toy, one that she could strap on and let it work for her, giving her two free hands to massage her breasts and alternate between sucking each one of her own nipples.
He lost his clothing quickly, smiling at her wickedly, moving to join her on the bed, his hands moving to her hair as he pulled the stiffness out of his pants, and gently tapped her lips with it. She loved him like this, ready eager, and demanding. She opened her pink mouth open for him, and he guided his hardness into it, feeling her tongue slide over the length of him.
She felt him moving, sliding in in and out gently, working her mouth until she could take more and more. Finally, she felt him move into position. He grabbed both of her massive breasts and held them together, sliding his huge member between them, fucking her this way over and over. He moaned loudly as she licked the top of him each time it poked out of the top of her breasts, giving him just a tease of her mouth again.
“Oh God Kate, yes.” He groaned out until he couldn’t take it anymore.
He flipped her over, and she smiled with his actions. This was her favorite, and he knew it. She felt him spread her wide, and she lay flat on the bed this time. Feeling him push into her she moaned loudly and arched her back slightly. He always gave her exactly what she wanted. He pushed into her over and over, the two of them becoming one and she knew it would always be good between them.
He rolled her over, this time she found herself on top. She slid her tight sheath down over him, until she rested on him, fully encompassed by her body. She leaned forward slightly as she slid up and off slightly and then back down hard and swift. She felt his hands on her hips, guiding her and she watched her huge globes pound him in the face as he worked her hips on his member.
She pumped harder and harder, faster than she thought possible as she gave him everything she had. She made circles slowly, but he refused to let h
er slow down, instead grabbing her hips with his hands, and using her to pound hard.
“Please oh….please, Aaron.”
He looked at her as she climaxed reaching her orgasm as she came down hard on his staff. He gave her time to recover, before turning her slightly until she was laying on her side, and he had on leg on his shoulders. He was able to push in even deeper this way and she yelled out as he pushed into her the first few times.
Soon he had a rhythm, pounding her hard as he smacked her ass with one hand, pinching her fat nipple with the other hand. She was his, and he was using her now, just like he had the blonde at the pool. She felt another surge of ecstasy as he fucked her hard, using her tightness to get off. She urged him on.
“Use me Aaron, take it…..take it.” She yelled out his name as she found another orgasm this time she felt the evidence of it as she felt the wetness covering him as he pumped into her.
He moaned loudly, this time pulling himself out of her, and she took over, her mouth replacing her wet sheath as she let him pump into her mouth over and over, only stopping as he cried out her name and he spilled all over her face and chest.
After, they lay together, him staring at her with a faraway look.
“What?” She asked him.
“What are we going to do with another baby love?” He arched an eyebrow at her and she blushed profusely.
“How did you know?” She had a feeling she already knew the answer to her question but she asked it anyway.
“You do a little something special when your pregnant Kate, and you scream with your orgasms, they are so much more intense. I know your body.” He gave her a wink as she moved into his arms, letting him hold her tightly.
“I was going to tell you…” she trailed off.
“Well I saved you that conversation then didn’t I?” He kissed the top of her head.
“I love you Aaron, I have to wonder what would have happened if I didn’t see you with the blonde in the pool that day. If I hadn’t embraced being turned on and let myself have the orgasm in the pool house.”