“I’ve got a full range of skills I don’t put to use.”
“Well, it’s good to know you don’t victimize other women with those godawful lines.”
He raises a brow, an amused expression on his face. “It got you to laugh,” he points out.
“That it did,” I agree with a couple nods.
“So, where are you from?” he asks.
“Right outside Raleigh.”
“Here you go,” the bartender interrupts, placing our drinks on the bar. Marcus sets some money down before grabbing them and handing mine to me.
I take a drink, letting the taste of hops coat my tongue and run down my throat. “What about you? Where are you from?” I ask.
“Apex.” He brings his beer up to his lips and I fixate on them. They’re full and lickable. My eyes widen in surprise, and I don’t know if it’s from his answer, or my thoughts.
“Oh, wow, so you’re over in my neck of the woods.”
“It appears so,” he says with a nod.
The DJ switches songs and within the first few notes, I recognize it. “Ahh! This is my song!” I shout to him. My arms go up in the air as I let out a whoop, my excitement getting the better of me. My friends follow suit, and without a word, we all start moving to the rhythm and having a great time. I avoid eye contact with them to keep from being subjected to their questioning glances or knowing smirks. When the lyrics talk about windows and walls and sweat dripping down balls, we belt out the lines as loud as we can.
“Sweat drip down your what?” I hear his voice say in my ear. It sends a chill up my spine. I didn’t realize he was so close to me.
Turning around to face him, I look around before meeting his gaze again. “My balls?” My eyes squint as my head tilts to the side, trying to hold in my smile, but my efforts are futile.
His mouth pulls up slowly at the corners before he flashes me the whitest smile I’ve ever seen, which is followed by a deep laugh. “That’s what I thought you said.”
“Oh, come on, you know you love this song.”
“Not as much as I love watching you sing it,” he says with a little laugh.
I roll my eyes, but before I can fire back with a sassy reply, he grabs my hand and drags me to the dance floor. I should put more effort into resisting, but I don’t. All of the normal fight in my body to thwart off men has evaporated.
Once he’s found us a nice spot, his hand goes to my lower back and he pulls me in close to him. I do my best to stifle the nerves floating at the surface. It’s been forever since I’ve danced like this with a man. Even when I was with that piece of shit Seth, I didn’t dance like this; he hated dancing. I try to focus on the music and not how my body feels right now, but it’s impossible. He’s pressed against every inch of me with one leg between mine as we dance to the beat.
As soon as I look up, I know it’s a big mistake. His eyes pierce through mine as he stares down at me intently. I’ve never felt like a person was looking into my soul, but that’s how it feels in this moment, and I’m powerless to look away. Everyone else around us fades to a dull murmur. Neither of us looks away and the only thing that exists is Marcus and me as this crazy connection builds with each second that goes by.
I should probably focus more on how my body is moving as we dance, but I can’t stop staring up at him like some love-sick fool. I think I’m pulling it off, but I can’t be sure with the slight buzz I currently have. It makes me care less about how I look when I should care more.
Here’s the thing about dancing. I can, I just don’t. Not sober anyway. But once I get a little alcohol in me, all inhibition flies out the window.
As does my coordination.
“I can’t follow you,” he shouts into my ear, breaking the connection. At first, I’m not sure what he said, but then it dawns on me. Holy shit. I’m worse than I thought. I just smile, grab his hand and lead him back to the bar. I know I’ll be embarrassed tomorrow when I reflect on this with a clear mind. Then again, I’ll never see this guy again, so maybe I’ll be able to brush it off.
Feeling suddenly shy, I tuck my hair behind my ear and avert my gaze. His finger goes to my chin and lifts up, forcing me to look at him. He searches my face for a moment before his eyes hone in on my lips. When he grabs my left hand, I swallow hard and stop breathing. I’m desperate to have his lips on mine, but I know I can’t go there. Despite my heart screaming at me to get the hell away, my natural instinct is to get closer. Being torn by my internal war, I can’t move. I don’t know what it is about this guy. I know nothing about him but feel this pull. Sure, it’s based purely on physical attraction, but I’m drawn to him, nonetheless.
His intense stare darkens and travels down my body and back up before he releases his grip on my chin and my hand. He turns away from me abruptly and rests his elbows on the bar top. I’m perplexed by the sudden mood change.
“Is everything okay?” Now I feel stupid. I mean, what’s his deal? His only response is to nod while refusing to look at me. “Want another?” I ask.
“Nah, I’m good.” His tone is clipped and I know for a fact something is off. My mind spins trying to figure out what I might have said or done to piss him off. I shouldn’t care and I can’t for the life of me figure out why I do. “How long have you been married?” Slowly, his head turns to the side to look at me.
For half a second I’m confused by his question, but then I remember the fake ring I have on my finger to keep situations like this from happening. He must have felt it when he was holding my hand. I could tell him the truth. It’s silly enough and not a big deal, but before I can process my choices, my mouth opens and I say, “A little over a year.”
He nods his head several times. “Don’t you think you should’ve mentioned that before?” His tone is ice cold and my alcohol induced mind is feeling the effects and losing my buzz.
“You never asked, and I never made you any promises, Marcus.” But that’s a lie. I might not have verbally said anything, but my body was sending all the signals.
He stands up to his full height, making me look up and faces me once more. “You’re right, Lydia.” He holds out his hand just like he did when we first met. “It was nice meeting you. Your husband is a lucky man.” Leaning in, he gives me a chaste kiss on the cheek before disappearing in the crowd.
I’m rooted to my spot unable to move. What the hell just happened?
This is what you want, my mind reminds me.
Maybe if I say it enough, I’ll start to believe it again.
RACHAEL DUNCAN IS an Army wife and mother to two beautiful girls. She grew up in Nashville, Tennessee and went off to graduate from the University of Tennessee with a bachelor’s degree in political science. With initial plans to work in politics, she moved to Washington, D.C. and worked on Capitol Hill for a House Representative. After a short time, she realized it wasn’t for her and began pursuing other careers until she started writing.
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STANDALONES:
Calculated Risk
Risk and Reward
Hopeless Vows
First and Last
Tackled by Love
THE LIES AND TRUTH SERIES:
Hidden in Lies
Uncovered by Truth
The Lies and Truth Box Set
First, I’d like to thank my family. My husband and two girls are my support and motivation. I push myself and strive to do better because of you. Thank you for your encouragement and love. I couldn’t take this crazy journey without you.
I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again; it takes a village to publish a book. I have an incredible team of people that help me through the whole process, and I don’t know what I would do without them. Jody, Laura, Georgette, and Isabelle, thank you so much for taking the time to beta read for me. Your feedback is more than appreciated and
Paige’s story wouldn’t be what it is without you.
To Nichole Strauss with Insight Editing, you’re awesome. This is our seventh book we’ve worked on together, and I can’t thank you enough. I love that I can bounce ideas off of you and get your feedback on changes when I start having doubts. Thank you.
Christine Borgford with Type A Formatting, thanks for designing another gorgeous interior. We’re seven books in and you never disappoint.
Lindee Robinson with Lindee Robinson Photography, thank you! You were absolutely awesome to work with. Your patience and responsiveness was amazing when I was indecisive, allowing me to select the perfect picture. Your photos are gorgeous and I look forward to working with you more in the future.
Marisa with Cover Me, Darling, you’ve done it again. You’ve designed another fabulous cover for me, and I couldn’t be more thankful.
Thank you, Judy at Judy’s Proofreading, for catching the last few mistakes that fall through the cracks. I know I’m publishing the cleanest version possible with you going over it last. Thank you.
Ena and Amanda with Enticing Journey, you always put together a stress-free cover reveal and release blitz for me. I know I’m in good hands with you ladies. Thank you so much for your hard work and everything you do. XO
Last, but certainly not least, thank you sooooo much to all the readers and bloggers. Because of you guys, I’m able to do what I love and I can’t tell you how much that means to me. Much love to you all.
At Her Own Risk Page 20