Magda let James’s words sink in. She knew it would take longer than a breath, and she would have to replay them in her mind over again that night when she was alone, but she still had questions. Since he was being so forthcoming, she wanted to take advantage of it in the moment.
“So you’re saying I should be a bit more understanding regarding his confusion?” she asked, tilting her head to the side and looking up at the captain.
“Absolutely not,” he said, surprising her even further. “I’m telling you the right man will figure it out and take the risk for the right woman. If you’re the right woman, Nick will come to you with an apology and a declaration of love, monogamy, and whatever else goes into a stable relationship. If he does not, then you know where you stand with him.”
Magda nodded once, her eyes going back to Nick without even trying. He was looking out to the sea, lost in his thoughts. Of Remy? Of Magda? She did not know. Magda hated waiting, but it seemed there was no other option for her right now if she wanted to be with Nick.
Five
When James slept that night, he did not dream of Remy. Instead, he dreamed of his childhood. He dreamed of what it felt like to be alive. He dreamed of his father, tall and intimidating, simply by walking into a room. He dreamed of his mother, strong and warm, with just one glance. He dreamed of his younger brother, clumsy and eager, who wanted nothing more than to be like his James. James dreamed about the pool of women he would have been able to choose from when he was required to select his final bride. He dreamed of the power he would have had over his people, after his father stepped down. And he dreamed of their lifeless faces during the raid that killed everyone.
He lost his cool, then. He went to extract revenge without thinking about it, without coming up with a plan. He went by himself. He killed in anger, using emotions rather than his logic. In the end, he paid for it. With his life. No one was avenged. It was a senseless death that could have been prevented if he allowed himself some space from the situation, if he gave himself room to breathe, to feel the pain before acting on it. If he gave himself time to plan.
He would not make that same mistake twice. Especially not when it was Remy’s life on the line.
The next morning, he decided to call a meeting, to be held in the galley of his ship. Only a select group of crewmembers were invited. James allowed Nick to pick the members he wanted present at his discretion until James realized they were still gone, off with Nick’s ship, doing Nick’s job of ferrying souls to their final resting place. If they did not, the souls would pile up and overflow, causing great harm to The Neverland ecosystem. As such, the meeting was small. Besides the two captains, only Magda was present there because both men trusted her implicitly.
The galley was belowdeck, cleaner than most pirate ship galleys. James was particular about clutter, and he assigned a man named Teague to sweep up the galley three times a day. He was also required to wipe down each and every surface before everyone ate in the morning and after everyone ate at night. Plates and dishes were also required to be put in their proper places. It wasn’t orthodox, to be so insistent on a clean ship, but it was important to James, and he didn’t particularly care what anyone else thought.
Magdalena was probably the first person here, a good fifteen minutes before the meeting's commencement. She was a stickler for punctuality, something James admired about her but couldn't participate in himself. From what she told him, fairies were a tad flighty, and that was putting it mildly. They were tardy, forgetful, and didn't particularly care because the majority of their community was the same way. As such, no one was bothered by such behavior because it was expected. However, Magda was one of the few who wasn't and it drove her mad when she had to deal with behavior, especially from those who were not fey, who did not possess such an excuse. Not that she considered it an excuse, exactly, but she always made it a point to show up early. To be quite honest, it amused James, and when he saw her standing there, arms crossed over her chest, chewing on her bottom the lip the way she always did when she was deep in thought about something, tapping her foot in a pattern he did not even think she realized she was doing, he smiled to himself.
Her eyes narrowed in on him when she saw him walk in and he gave her a charming smile. Magda could resist it, he knew, but she would soften just a bit, and that was enough for him.
"What?" she asked, quirking a brow. He watched as the grip on her tunic sleeves tightened just do.
He shook his head, a small smile touching his lips. "I just missed you," he said. "How was everything? I know we touched on the subject briefly, but..." He shook his head. This odd feeling bubbling up in his chest - a sense of lightness mixed in with joy with a caress of compassion and regret at their temporary separation was not something James felt on a regular basis. In fact, James did not think he had ever felt such things at all. Even the look on Magda's face resembled one of shock, as though she, too, did not understand his uncharacteristic show of emotion.
"Everything went as well as could be expected," Magda said slowly, still trying to pin him down with her stare. Still not being able to. He could not help but deepen his grin because of it, and the thought caused s warmth to spread across his chest. "I did exactly as you said. Captain Grey is more intelligent than I gave him credit for and knew the moment I freed him and his crew from jail why I assisted him. However, he let me stay on board and, surprisingly, kept nothing from me."
"I suppose I should thank him," James said, looking at the table where they ate their food each meal. His thoughts stretched out. He realized he hadn't been as appreciative of her as he should be. Even Nick was helpful, though James did not think it was intentional.
"I didn't do it for you." At that moment, Nick swept through the galley, his shoulders rolled back, standing at his full height. He was not quite as tall as James but he was much more bulky, strong. James wasn't the sort to fight with his hands but he would not put it past Nick to have the ability to beat his opponent to a pulp. "She's a brilliant fighter and an intelligent strategist. I was lucky you sent her to me, whatever your intentions were."
“I’m going to see if Teague is finished with our meal,” Magda said. “I’ll return shortly.”
James pressed his lips together, cocking his head to the side as he watched her shut the door behind her before shifting them over to Nick. His eyes narrowed, though he could not say if he was suspicious or simply being studious. He was looking for something though he could not say what that was. He did know that if he found it, he would know.
“You care for her.” The words were out of his mouth before he could stop them. He did not want to stop them.
Nick clenched his teeth so his jaw popped. “Care for who?” he asked.
Yes, that was the question. Originally, he thought it was Remy. He was almost positive it was Remy. But now, he knew that not to be the case.
“Magda.” Nick opened his mouth, but James cut him off. “Do not treat me like a fool, Captain Grey. I see the way you look at her. It’s clear as the sky. It’s easy to read, to decipher. A blind man could see it.”
“I get your point,” Nick growled, snapping his eyes at James with a look similar to the ferociousness a beast might occupy.
“Do you deny it?” James asked. “Truly? And remember, I can tell a liar. Especially one that lies so poorly.”
Nick clenched his jaw again. His gaze was still fierce, still biting, but he remained silent. Which was omission enough.
“Magdalena has that effect on people, especially men,” James said with a slight quirk of his lips. “She’s been with me over a hundred years and I’ve seen men fall in love with her at first glance. I shouldn’t be surprised.” He pressed his lips together, poking his chin with the tip of his hook. He did not think about it; it was an unconscious tic he picked up after losing his hand. “What does concern me, however, is that she seems to actually reciprocate your feelings.” Now, James’s voice was tight, much more controlled. He did not like admitting that Magda
felt anything for this man. It would have been so much easier if this were the case. His eyes watched Nick carefully, taking in everything his face had to offer, trying to pick up anything he could. “But you know that.”
Well, this was a surprise.
Nick and Magda knew how the other felt.
“Why do I feel this sadness coming from her, then?” he asked. He placed his good hand on his jutted hip. “Perhaps it’s none of your business and I most certainly can guarantee she would not want me telling you this, but I care about her more than you probably understand so I find it’s my job to ensure she’s all right. And right now, she most certainly is not.” He paused, clenching his teeth together now. “You know she cares for you, you clearly care for her, and yet, for some reason, you two are separated. There’s a distance, a coldness between you. If I had to guess, I would say she’s avoiding you.”
"I can't speak for her," Nick murmured but his tone was less biting than James would normally guess it would be. "I am not avoiding her."
"You do not deny that you care for her?" James asked, tilting his head to the side.
"Why would I deny something when you are going to believe what you are going to believe regardless of what I say?" Nick said, then shook his head. "Hell, I don't even know what to believe anymore."
James paused. "What do you mean?" he asked.
Nick furrowed his brow, flashing his eyes at James. He seemed to contemplate something. James wasn't sure what that was but Nick seemed to make up his mind about it.
"Look," he said. "We aren't friends. I don't like you. However, I understand that you and Magdalena share a special relationship. You probably know her better than anyone. Not that this is any of your business but I think it prudent that you know I do care about her. More than I've cared about anyone before her." His eyes flashed with something vulnerable, something James didn't expect to see. In fact, James could swear he winced, which was strange. Which he did not think was possible. "But here's the thing, I told her that about Remy so I can't tell her that because why would she believe me? Why would she think she's the only one who's ever made me feel the way she does when I've told her the same damn thing about another girl?"
James pressed his lips together, nodded once. "So, instead of manning up and admitting you made a mistake, you're going to sit around and feel sorry for yourself while she wallows around in her misery because she went out on a limb and trusted you with her heart and you handed it right back to her in pieces?" James asked. "Essentially, you proved everything she used to believe in about love, which was why she avoided the thing for as long as possible even though more than a few men have fallen for her. She's easy to fall in love with, wouldn't you say? And I believe that she'll realize that quite soon. And once she does, I hope she doesn't settle for men like you, men who are only concerned with their love and not hers, who put themselves first."
He clenched his jaw and looked away. "Do you know how she ended up with me?" he asked. "Has she told you that story?"
Nick clenched his jaw and looked away. He shook his head so locks of hair fell into his face but he made no move to brush them away. His eyes were focused on James and James alone.
"I thought not," James said, his lips turning up in a sneer. "Her mother gave her to me in order to save herself and her daughter. As ruler of a realm, I have the power to protect a fairy from having their wings plucked from their backs. If a fairy does lose her wings, she's all but banished from her community. It's a random occurrence; it's not as though Magdalena did anything on purpose to get her wings stolen from her. She just had bad luck in that moment. Her mother summoned me and asked for a trade. At this point, I already had Pam, but I was intrigued by the prospect of a mother giving up her daughter in order to save herself and her other daughter. Plus, there were no fairies in The Other World."
"Yes," Nick said, "well, your preference for Magda caused Pam to change sides, didn't it?"
"Remy had a theory," James said, tapping his chin with his index finger. "How Pam was the reason for Peter Pan's infiltration of The Other World. I didn't listen to her. I should have. I just did not" -
"You did not believe her," Nick finished, looking over at him. There did not seem to be any judgment in his gone. If anything, he seemed to understand. "Her behavior sometimes makes you think she needs protecting. It's easy to not take her assumptions seriously, especially if they seem outlandish."
"It did not seem that outlandish," James said. "I just..." He shook his head. "I just did not believe her, and I should have. I have no idea why Pan and Pam" -
Nick rolled his eyes. "Cute," he muttered under his breath.
- "are working together. They do not seem as though they would fit together at all. She's shy, meek. She died and wasn't ready to move on. Seemed like a nice enough kid so I took her under my wing. She didn't say much. I liked that." James's eyes darkened, the color resembling the bottom of the sea. "Pan, on the other hand" -
"Pan gave you that hook," Nick said, nodding his head at James's left hand.
"You've heard that story?"
"Hasn't everybody?"
James gave him a flat look. “Should we go look for Magda?” he asked.
“Perhaps we should call off this meeting,” Nick muttered.
James shot him a look but did not disagree.
Six
The minute Remy and Pam were escorted to a carriage and tucked securely inside, Remy whirled on Pam with a ferocity she did not realize she possessed and snarled, “Just what do you think you are doing, Pam?”
It had been longer than a week since she was brought to a tiny island, just off to the side of The Paradise’s entrance. It seemed inhabited only by a few thousand people who served The Magistrate. However, they had families, earned a living doing jobs, and actually lived here. It was not pretend and it was not a front. These were souls that were either not ready to cross over, or they were souls The Magistrate prevented from crossing over so she could use them herself to do her bidding. If the latter, that went against every rule in The Neverland. At least, that was what Nick mentioned before.
Remy had been going stir-crazy in her room. She was only released for meals and when The Magistrate wanted to see her, which wasn’t often. She almost missed being on a ship for a length of time, only because at least the air was fresh and cool, and she was allowed to go wherever she wanted on a ship because she could not go anywhere except the ship, unless, of course, she wanted to swim with the souls that made up the ocean in The Neverland.
The only reason why she was allowed to go out now, Remy knew, was because Pam was supervising her. She almost hated Pam for it. From where they started to where they were now, Pam was a cold, manipulating bitch, and Remy wanted nothing more than to claw her eyes out. If it were not for Pam, she would still be with James on his ship, still be with Nick and Magda, probably deciding what to do now and how to get back home.
If she wanted to get back home.
Of course you want to come home, her mother’s voice lectured in her head. We miss you dearly, Remy. What would compel you to stay?
James’s face flashed before her eyes and she felt her heart constrict. Each day without James caused it to get heavier with regret. She felt something for him, something strong and something different, and she wished she had given herself the opportunity to explore just what that was before they were forced into separation. She had been afraid; she had been ignorant, but the distance cleared her head and made everything clear. She loved James, as ridiculous as it sounded, and she needed to find him and tell him. Even if he did not feel the same way. Even if he thought her stupid for having such feelings. At least then, she would know. At least then, she would live.
For now, she needed to get as much information as she could from Pam. Pam did not frighten her and intimidate Remy the way she used to. Remy did not respect her or care about the fact that she was uncomfortable speaking to others. Pam knew things that Remy needed to know if she was ever to escape. Because Remy would
escape. She could not wait for someone to rescue her; she would have to rescue herself.
"Pam," she said once the carriage was well on its way. Her colorful eyes narrowed in on the girl across from her - Remy forced herself to remember that she was just a girl, no matter how cold and how cruel she was, and she was acting from her emotions and her heart more than anything else. Remy could relate to that. When she had been Pam's age, she acted out for the same reasons. Her actions never had such dire consequences, but she knew Pam's mentality. Perhaps she could reach her that way. "We need to talk."
Pam's eyes narrowed and Remy could feel the hostility slap her in the young girl's state. "I don't have to talk to you," Pam said, looking out the window.
Remy clenched her jaw. One of the things she hated was been dismissed based on her age and gender. It never happened as a result of her class or her status because her family was one of the elite on Port George, but she understood what it felt like for other reasons and it infuriated her. She was tired of being nice. She was tired of extending the olive branch only to get broken piece of bark thrown at her in return. Well, no more.
"Pam," Remy snapped. Pam's blue eyes snapped into hers and Remy had to bite her tongue to keep herself from grinning at her reaction. She had gotten a vulnerable, surprised reaction from the girl which was nice. Remy didn't think she had that power over her, but she was learning more about herself the longer she was in The Neverland. "I know you don't like me, and you have your reasons. I will not take them away from you. But you are not allowed to speak to me that way. You are not allowed to be blatantly disrespectful to me. I will not tolerate it. And since you're accompanying me to get my gown, not the other way around, you work for me. I may not be as well-versed as you are in the Neverland and how things work around here but I do know what it’s like to come from a well-to-do society. I know that you are nothing more than a servant girl, and you may hate me, but you answer to me. The amount of people I'm familiar with are countable on one hand. However, I also know I possess some power - power The Magistrate needs for her quest to acquire power or whatever it is she needs me for. The Magistrate seems like a smart woman because she has been nothing but gracious to me. She always makes sure I'm fed, clothed, and have a personal maid at my beck and call whenever I need her. I shouldn't have to remind you that you are that maid. She treats her captives better than her servants. What does that say about how she treats you?" She raised one eyebrow and stared at Pam, not blinking, not flinching. Her voice came out clear and strong. She spoke like she was a royal, like she was a queen, like she was her mother.
Life in Neverland: Book 3 of The Neverland Trilogy Page 4