by K. C. Lynn
He shrugs, “Sometimes, but I don’t regret my decision.”
Of course not, because that’s who Sawyer is: honorable, loving and strong. Suddenly the words of his tattoo slam into my head:
You will not break me, for I am unbreakable.
I will live with integrity, fight with honor and die for what’s right.
“Your tattoo… that’s what it means.” He nods confirming my statement. It makes me wonder if there’s anything in his life he regrets, that if he could ever do something over again, would he? I know there are a few things in my life I would do over again if I could…
I decide the only way to find out is ask him, “If you could go back and change one moment in your life, what would it be?” I expect him to say the week the three of them were held prisoner, but what he says next is something I will remember for the rest of my life.
“It would be to find you sooner, because I would have never let anyone hurt you.”
His sincere gaze bores into mine and it takes a moment for his words to sink in, but when they do it has my breath freezing in my lungs and my heart pounding with emotion. And it was in this exact moment I knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that I loved Sawyer Evans with my whole heart.
Resting my forehead against his, I close my eyes and try to stop my tears from falling, but one slips free. Sawyer wipes it away with his thumb affectionately. “Your moment should be that week in Iraq,” I choke out sadly.
“No, baby. I’d live through that all over again if it meant keeping you safe.”
More tears fall and I shake my head trying to stop their flow. Before my sobs can break free, Sawyer flips us so I’m on my back and he’s on top. I wrap my arms around him and bring him as close as I can, his face buries in my neck. “Every thing is going to be good now, Grace, you’ll see.”
I can’t believe how lucky I am to have met this man. I desperately want to tell him how much I love him, but I don’t want to freak him out, so instead I say, “You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, Sawyer.”
He leans back and looks down at me, his expression soft, “Same here, Cupcake… I’m the best thing that’s ever happened to me too.”
He watches me while I think about his words for a minute before he bursts out laughing. I slap him on the shoulder. “Leave it to you to ruin another romantic moment.”
“Don’t worry, baby, I’ll make it up to you, right now,” he says with a dirty grin. And boy does he ever.
The next afternoon I pull up to Jaxson and Julia’s to see Jaxson pushing Julia on the swing, with the dog running circles around them.
Jaxson looks pissed as he waves his hands around, yelling about something.
“Oh my gosh, my baby!” Grace cries and jumps out of the truck before I even come to a complete stop.
“Jesus Christ, woman…”
She ignores me and bolts towards Chuckie, who runs to meet her halfway. Grace falls to her knees, hugging and kissing the fucking thing as if she has been fucking gone three years, not three days.
As I make my way over to them, the dog runs to me also and rubs against my leg, which makes me feel like a prick. Bending down, I give him a pat on the head.
“Thank you so much for watchin’ him for me you guys,” Grace says, giving both Jaxson and Julia a hug. Jaxson returns her hug but still looks pissed about something.
“No problem, Grace. Did you have a good time meeting Sawyer’s family?” Julia asks.
Grace smiles at me, beaming with happiness. Which makes me pretty fucking happy too.
“Yes, I did. Sawyer’s family is wonderful.”
“That’s great. Chuckie was very well behaved.” Jaxson grunts, making her look like a liar.
“Uh oh. What happened? Was he not good?” Grace asks, worriedly.
Julia glares at Jaxson. “He was perfect. Jax is just grumpy today.”
“What are you spazzing about now?” I ask.
“She!” he points at Julia angrily, “and Susan are fucking allowing Anna to bring her fucking boyfriend overnight to my fucking house for Thanks-fucking-giving!”
“Really?” I reply, shocked. Jesus, that was brave of Julia.
“Yes, fucking really! And if that’s not bad enough then I find out she invites Ray fucking Jennings too!”
Okay, even I agree that is fucked up! Not only because the guy is Wyatt’s dad but the guy is also an arrogant prick.
Julia glares at Jaxson, looking like one pissed-off pregnant chick. “First off, Jaxson, it’s OUR house…”
“Whatever, same shit…”
“Secondly,” she continues, not letting him interrupt her, “if her parents are okay with it, then we will be too…”
“There is no fucking way Bill is okay with this.”
“It’s not like they’re sleeping in the same room for heaven’s sakes.”
“You’re goddamn right they won’t be!” Jaxson looks over at me now, “I’ll tell you what I’m going to do. I’m going to rig that fucker’s door shut. I’ll be fucking alerted immediately if anyone goes in or out of that fucking room.”
“What happens if he needs to use the bathroom?” Grace asks cautiously. “He can piss out the fucking window!”
Grace covers her mouth, muffling her laugh. Julia doesn’t care about covering hers and lets it out freely.
“This is not fucking funny!”
Julia rolls her eyes. “Jaxson, you’re being ridiculous, and if you’re not careful you will push Anna away,” she adds seriously.
“Okay so what about Jennings?” I ask Julia. I’m dying to hear why the hell she would do that.
She shifts nervously, “I invited him because he has no family, and no one should be alone on Thanksgiving. Including him. But it doesn’t matter anyways, he politely declined knowing how Jaxson feels about him.” She pauses, looking down at the ground, then swallows thickly, “I was just trying to be nice.”
Well shit! I feel like an asshole now.
Guilt washes over Jaxson’s hard expression. Grace walks closer to her and rubs her back. “Well I think it was awful nice of you to ask. And I agree, no one should be alone on Thanksgivin’… Right guys?” she glares over at Jaxson and me, wanting us to agree.
“Yup,” I agree quickly, not wanting my Cupcake pissed at me for anything.
“Fuck. Come here Jules.” Jaxson pulls her to him, wrapping her in his arms.
“I just feel bad for him is all,” she says softly in his chest.
I guess it’s true what they say about pregnant chicks crying over everything.
“I know, it’s fine, baby. Thanksgiving will be good, don’t worry.” He kisses her forehead, trying to smooth things over.
A minute later Julia steps back and looks over at Grace. “We’re having it on the Sunday. I’m hoping y’all will be able to come?”
“We would love to. Thanks for invitin’ us. I’ll bring the pies.”
Julia smiles happily again, her earlier upset already forgotten. Shit, that was fast.
“We should get going, Cupcake. I still need to stop by the apartment to grab some more stuff.” Nodding, Grace leans down, grabbing Chuckie’s leash. Then hugs Julia, thanking her again for watching the dog.
Jaxson walks over to me with a smirk, “Make sure you take the cork out of the dog’s ass when you get home,” he mumbles quietly.
I look over at him, stunned for a second then we’re both busting a gut. “What?” Grace asks, her and Julia staring at us in confusion. “Nothing,” we both reply at the same time.
Later that day, as Grace starts supper, I walk into the spare room and grab all my shit, moving it into hers since that’s where I’ll be sleeping from now on. Seeing the clean sheets on the bed, I pick them up and start changing the bedding. When I pull off her pillow a sketchbook falls to the floor at my feet. Picking it up, I stare at the open page.
“What the hell…” I mumble quietly.
The sketch is of some sort of cafe or bakery. It’s incredibly fucki
ng detailed, right down to the soft yellow walls with pink tables and chairs. Even pictures of some ‘50s style uniforms are glued to it. The top of the page says… ‘A Slice of Hope With A Sprinkle of Grace.’
Jesus, did she draw this?
I get pulled from my thoughts when Grace walks in. “Hey, do ya…” she stops abruptly when she sees what I’m holding. “Where did you get that?”
I clear my throat, worried she thinks I was snooping or some shit. “I was making the bed and when I pulled your pillow off it fell out.”
She doesn’t look mad just… I don’t fucking know, embarrassed maybe?
“What is this?”
Shaking her head, she walks up and tries to take it from me. “Nothin’ it’s stupid.” I hold it out of her reach, “It’s not stupid. Tell me what it is.”
I wait patiently as she debates whether she’s going to tell me. “Remember when I told you that day Mama and I were supposed to be headin’ out of town for a bakin’ contest with our pies?” I nod. “Well the prize money was for $20,000. We had saved our whole lives to one day have that bakery there,” she says, pointing at the picture sadly. “It was our dream for as long as I can remember. We would sell and serve our pies along with other kinds of bakin’. Mama never made much money, but that $20,000 was gonna be enough with the some we had saved to hopefully start it up. But it never happened, as you know…”
My heart constricts fucking painfully at the sadness that washes over her face, at not only losing her mom, but her dream too.
She points at the top of the page, “Mama’s name was Hope. We wanted something with both our names so that’s what she came up with. A couple years ago, when I was missin’ her somethin’ fierce, I started drawing it out, pretending that I would actually have it one day, even though I knew I never would.”
Her cheeks turn redder with embarrassment and she gives me a small fake smile, “You think I’m crazy, don’t ya?”
Putting the book down, I stand up and cup her face. “No, Cupcake, I think you’re fucking incredible.”
Her fake smile turns genuine. Cupping her ass, I pick her up and kiss the shit out of her. Hoping to replace the sadness in her eyes with something else.
I’m having one of the best sleeps of my life when the blare of a cell phone goes off, pulling me from my deep slumber.
I feel Sawyer’s warm, naked chest shift under my cheek as he reaches over to answer it, “Yeah?” His sexy, sleep, gravelly voice has me burrowing closer into him, but soon I feel him tense. “Fuck me, is he all right?”
I shoot up and look at the clock to see it’s one am; I instantly realize that a phone call this late at night can’t be good. I look back at Sawyer, his green eyes bore into mine with concern and regret.
Oh no! My heart begins to thunder and my stomach sinks with dread.
“Yeah, we’re on our way.”
“Sawyer? What is it, what’s wrong?” my voice shakes from fear.
Not taking his eyes off mine, he sits up and cups the side of my face tenderly. “It’s Mac, Cupcake. We need to go to the hospital.”
“What! Why? What’s happened?” A second after I shout the words I jump out of bed and run around frantically tryin’ to get dressed.
My mind races with all the horrible things that could have happened to him as I throw on my clothes from the day before.
Car accident? No, it’s a heart attack, I know it. I told him that greasy food he’s always eatin’ was going to catch up to him. As I rush to my dresser to grab socks, I run full force into Sawyer…
He grabs my arms and gives me a little shake. “Grace! Goddammit, calm down. Are you even listening to me?”
I suddenly realize he’s been talking to me, but I haven’t heard a word of it. “Oh god, please tell me he’s all right, Sawyer?” I choke out.
He pulls me against him. “I don’t know all the details yet, Cupcake. Cooper is going to fill us in at the hospital but he said Mac is stable.”
Stable… That has my pounding heart rate settling a little.
Sawyer grabs my face so he can stare directly into my eyes, “Everything will be okay, baby. I promise.”
Leaning down, he presses a quick kiss to my lips. “Come on let’s go.” He laces his fingers with mine and pulls me out the door.
Please God, let Mac be all right…
I keep a tight hold on Sawyer’s hand as we race through the emergency doors. I immediately catch sight of Cooper by the nurses’ station. He looks terrible, his hair is disheveled and he’s covered in black stuff… like soot or somethin’.
His head snaps in our direction. As we make our way to him, I notice he has quite the gash on his head.
“Oh my gosh! Cooper, are you all right?” I rush up to him and wrap my arms around his waist.
He hugs me back but it’s strained. “Hey, Grace, yeah don’t worry about me, I’m fine.”
“What the heck is goin’ on? What happened? Where’s Mac?” I ask, steppin’ back to look up at him. My stomach sinks with the way he looks down at me. It’s now I realize, what I’m about to hear is much worse than I thought. And somehow I know that this has nothin’ to do with a heart attack and everythin’ to do with me- with Miguel.
“Oh no… No, Cooper,” I choke out, shakin’ my head. My heart begins to pound so loud with fear it’s all I can hear. “He’s here, isn’t he? He’s found me.” My words sound distant to my own ears, like an echo in a tunnel.
Cooper’s expression says it all. Sawyer curses and pulls me against him. Taking deep breaths, I soak in his warmth and fight hard to hold my hysteria at bay.
“What did he do to Mac? Please tell me he’s okay, Cooper?” My stomach twists with terror; thinking of all the terrible things that could have been done to him.
“He’s going to be all right, Grace, but he’s pretty banged up. Mac was at the diner, closing up, when someone hit him from behind with what we assume is a metal object of some sort, maybe a bat or a crow bar? His face was pushed into the floor so he never got a look at the guy, but the attacker was demanding to know where you lived and where he could find you.” He pauses to expel a heavy breath, which has my already-twisted stomach sinking further. “He beat Mac repeatedly when he wouldn’t give him any information.”
“Oh god!” I whisper painfully, as tears begin to stream down my cheeks.
I realize he’s not finished when his expression becomes more regretful. “He then set fire to the diner and left Mac inside.”
“NO!” I cover my mouth as an agonizing sob rips from my throat, and my knees buckle under me.
“Fuck!”
Just before they give out completely Sawyer lifts me off my feet and walks over to a chair in the waiting room, bringing me down on his lap.
I bury my face into his neck and sob, “This is all my fault, Sawyer. I knew it was only gonna be a matter of time before he found me.”
He grabs my face between his hands, forcing me to look at him. His eyes are filled with a rage I’ve never seen from him before. “Listen to me. This isn’t your fault, Grace. None of it, do you hear me?”
Shaking my head, I close my eyes as guilt and despair wash over me. He’s wrong; it is my fault, Mac almost died because of me, for trying to protect me…
“Look at me, baby.” Opening my eyes, I look into Sawyer’s again. “The one good thing about all of this is we now know where the fucker is, which is going to make it a hell of a lot easier to catch him.”
“Was he by himself?” I ask, looking over at Cooper.
“It appears that way. Mac says he only heard one voice, but he never saw him, so I’m not going to completely rule out the possibility of another quite yet.”
“How badly are Mac’s injuries from the fire?”
I hold my breath terrified for his answer. “Apart from aggravation of the smoke, the majority of his injuries are from the assault. I was on my way home right after the fire was set, drove by like I do every night. I was able to get to him in time.”
&
nbsp; “And the diner?”
Coop shakes his head regretfully. “I’m sorry, Grace, but it’s gone… all of it.”
I cover my face and cry as devastation consumes me. Everything… he lost everything because of me.
Sawyer pulls me closer. “It’s all right, baby. Mac’s okay and that’s what is most important.”
“I want to see him.”
“They’re only allowing family in to see him. I explained to the nurse that you were the closest to family he had, so she is allowing you in, but, Grace…” he pauses, “you need to be prepared, he’s in bad shape.”
“I understand,” I whisper faintly.
“Come on, Cupcake.” Standing, Sawyer keeps his arm around me as we follow Cooper to Mac’s room.
An older, sweet-looking nurse walks out as we approach. She gives me a sad but kind smile, “Are you Grace?”
I nod. “He’s expecting you, just not too long all right? He needs his rest.”
“I’ll wait right here with Coop, baby.” Leaning down, Sawyer kisses the top of my head. I hug him tightly and try to absorb some of his strength.
Stepping back, I pause momentarily at the door, not knowing what I will face on the other side of it. Then taking in a deep breath I brace myself before walking in. The room is fairly dark, only a soft glow from the bathroom light, but it’s enough for me to see the heartbreaking sight in front of me: Mac, a black and blue swollen mess, barely recognizable. With one arm and one leg in a cast.
Bile rises in my throat, and my heart shatters in a million pieces. The door clicking shut brings his attention to me. “Well there’s my darlin’, you bring me any pie, girl?”
I tried. I really, really did, but the sound of his rough voice, laced with pain along with his darlin’ sends me over the edge. An agonized sound falls from my lips before I rush over and hug him as gently as I can. “Oh, Mac, I’m so sorry, so, so sorry,” I sob into his chest.
“Hey now… none of that, you crazy girl. This isn’t your fault, Grace, you hear me?” His voice is so rough I can barely understand him.