by Amy Miles
“And Cecily? You two danced the night through,” Taryn said, mentioning the fourth girl we’d travelled to meet.
“Aye. She was nice enough. My mother’s hopes of finding a suitable lass in Fionn had shattered within minutes of arriving."
The stench of the fishing town had permeated everything it touched. Not even a vast array of smelling salts had eased the queen’s discomfort, and she’d taken to her bed for days on end. Though Cecily seemed like a decent girl, the queen’s sensitive constitution had forced the visit to remain brief.
“It was all such a blasted waste of time,” I breathed out and rubbed at my temples. It was far too early in the morning to endure a headache. “Not one single girl met my mother’s expectations. What does she expect me to do when she’s the one sabotaging everything?”
“I’m surprised it bothers ya so much.”
“What?” I sat forward and drilled her with an incredulous stare. “Did you not hear me?”
“Sure, I did. And it’s frustratin’ to be sure, but isn’t this what ya wanted? For the girls to all fail so your ma wouldn’t have a choice but to accept me? If ya don’t care how this goes, why have ya got your panties all in a twist over it?”
I blinked several times. Then I laughed and shook my head. “I guess you’re right. I don’t care beyond the fact it’s all been for nothing. I’ve never been farther from helping my people than I am in this moment.”
“Then change it,” she replied.
I groaned and leaned back against the headboard. “You make it sound so easy.”
“You’re the prince. Ya have some say in what happens, ya know?”
“I wish that were true.” I tugged at the unkempt strands of hair that fell over my eyes. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to come in here and dump this on you. It’s not fair.”
“I dunna mind. Well, apart from ya wakin’ me up and all. It’s nice to have ya talkin’ to me again.” She shot me a sheepish smile. I was relieved to notice that her death grip on her covers had eased a bit. We could do this. I knew we could. We had to find a way to get used to each other. “All day long I’m surrounded by people who are paid to be nice to me. Or to spy on me. You’re the only one who even gives a damn that I’m around.”
“Of course I do.” My throat tightened and the familiar ball of guilt began to unravel. “I never meant for this tour to linger so long. I know it’s been hard on you.”
“Ack.” She waved me off. “It’s the least I can do to thank ya for saving my arse.”
I blinked several times. “Did you just thank me?”
“Aye.” She nodded. “I did. But don’t you be makin’ a big deal of it. I can be nice when I want to be.”
“Wow.” I leaned back against the mountain of pillows on her bed and shook my head. “You amaze me.”
She held my gaze for a moment before she looked away. “I’m here like ya wanted. I’ve done the song and dance routine, and we are no better off than we were before. I need to know what more ya want from me, Aed.”
“I want you to be happy.”
Taryn snorted. “That’s not likely to happen.”
“Why not?” I slid closer to her on the bed and then took her hands in mine. “I still believe I can make you happy.”
Her skin looked so pale in the early morning light. “Ya mean together, as man and wife?”
“Aye. I will be good to you. Treat you like you deserve. You only have to officially say yes, and I’ll make all of this go away.”
“Just like that?”
“I don’t want to force your hand, Taryn. I want you to have a choice. Besides, I only went along with this whole mess to try to give you time to fall head over heels for me.” I winked.
Her blush made her face look fresh and clean. Vacant of gobs of makeup or vanity, she was real and yet still beautiful to me. “And then what? You’ll sweep me off my feet and whisk me away to our honeymoon?”
I couldn’t help but grin at the grimace that followed that final word. “Do you think I will be so bad in bed?”
“Again with the gutter mind.” She shoved me back with a playful push. “Ya need to be acceptin’ that I won’t be givin’ you any of that any time soon.”
I held up my hands in defense. “I was only saying…”
“I know what ya were sayin’, Aed, but it changes nothin’.” When she draped her legs over the edge of the bed, I made sure to keep my eyes locked onto hers. “I will marry ya if that’s what it takes to see things change for our people. To save my family and my head, but you’ve said it yourself. You could stop this at any time if you wanted to. You’ve done what your ma asked. Isn’t it time to go home now? To get back to what really matters?”
“We have two more stops already planned out.”
“But must we? You know as well as me that time is runnin’ short. It’s a miracle there hasn’t been another issue at the Wall, but that makes me nervous. Somethin’ isn’t right. The lorcan figured out a way to get through the first time. They should have attacked by now. You can say ‘no’ to the charade. Stop all this. Not for me, but for your people. Do what’s right.”
I rubbed the back of my neck. “I understand your concern, truly, I do, but it’s not that easy. If I went to my parents and told them I chose you and no one else, maybe I could end this. But I won’t. Not until you are sure you want me.”
“Has this ever been about what I want? I owe you my life, Aed, but we both know I’m not cut out for this.”
I swallowed and looked away. “What you want matters to me, Taryn. That’s why I won’t force you to marry me.”
Her silence drove me to distraction. I needed to look back at her to see the range of emotions I knew I would find displayed there. At the same time, I feared what I might see. All along, I had fought to do the right thing. To keep her and her family alive and safe, but deep down I also wanted her to choose me on her own. To see there was hope of a life together beyond me saying it or wishing for it. I needed to know she could let go of her past with Devlin. That she could see only me.
Was that selfish? Sure. Without a doubt. That didn’t change my needs or desires. I couldn’t imagine a life without some amount of love mixed in. I had no desire to share my wife with the ghost of a man she once cared for. Maybe even loved. And even though I didn’t love Taryn in the way a man should, I believed we could grow into something good.
“I need you by my side, Taryn,” I whispered. “You are the voice of reason that keeps my feet on the right path. But I will not force you. When you are ready, I will be here. Until then, we have today to think about.”
She reached out and took my hand. “I hate to see you so miserable.”
“I have my good moments. Like seeing you rooting around under your covers. That image will get me through the day.” I looked at her. “My wee little piglet.”
When she punched me on the arm, I felt every bit of the pain, but I welcomed it. This was who we used to be. Companions. Partners. Without the shite forced between us. My posture became less rigid as I twined our fingers together and knelt at her feet to look up at her. “Thank you. Truly. I needed this.”
“Aye,” she whispered. “I did too.”
I lifted her hand to my lips and pressed a soft kiss there. “I am sorry we’ve become so distant. It was never my intention—”
“Sire.” The call came through the open doorway of our adjoining rooms. I turned as a messenger appeared in the doorway. His face froze with shock when he found me kneeling at Taryn’s feet and then averted his gaze.
“Apologies, my prince. An urgent message has arrived. Should I…?”
“Bring it here,” I called, annoyed by the disruption. It seemed like no matter what I did, I could not be free of my duties, even for a few brief moments. The man placed a letter in my hand and hurried away.
“What is it?” Taryn craned her neck to see as I unrolled the paper. It had seen a great deal of wear. The edges were smudged and damp. My hands shook a bit as I scanned the par
chment.
“It is a letter from the Wall. My gods, it was sent three months back.”
She sat up straight. “Any news of my cousin?”
I looked up from the page. “Eivin was his name, yes?”
“Yes.” She wrapped the sheet around her like a toga and sank down beside me.
“This was penned by his own hand.” With each line I read, worry took root in my chest.
“What is it?” She spoke beside my shoulder.
“There was an attack on a ship bound for the Isle of Glass.” I skimmed farther. “The lorcan breached the Wall near Murigen, the seaport closest to Hollow Earth. Eivin says the lorcan sank the ship and killed those on board.”
I rose and began pacing as my thoughts raced.
“But that is impossible,” she said. “They canna live in sea water.”
My hands began to shake as nervous tension wound through me. “Aye. The sea has always been a natural barrier. It protects the entire northern lands. If they’ve found a way to survive the water…there’s no way left to keep them out.”
“Gods, help us,” Taryn whispered, clutching her midsection in a fierce hug. “You said the message is three months late arriving. What if it’s already too late?”
“Cashel!” I shouted, knowing my man would be guarding outside my room. The outer door opened and closed. He appeared in the doorway seconds later. Much like me, his battle wounds showed signs of a healer’s touch. “I have a task for you.”
“Yes, sire.”
I handed my friend the letter and waited as he read over it. The pinch of his brow told me I was not alone in my concern for this new development.
“Wait! This soldier talks of a survivor from the wreckage. A young girl who saw the lorcan attack her ship. He’s kept her under his supervision for further questioning.” Cashel pointed to the page.
“Aye. I need you to go in my place. Seek out Eivin and this girl. Then report back. I need to know the truth of their tale.”
I felt Taryn’s gaze on me, so I turned to her. “Do you have a message you would like passed on to your cousin?”
It was easy to see the indecision and longing on her face. I was sure there were so many things she wanted to say to him, but true to her nature, she focused on what mattered most. “Tell him to keep his head down and his arse covered.”
I smiled. “You heard the lady.”
Cashel bowed and left us alone. I paced a moment longer, lost to my thoughts.
“It is time to end this, Aed.” She rested a hand on my arm and I ceased my pacing. “Your people need you.”
“Aye. And here I am trapped in this godforsaken place.”
“And what will ya be doin’ about it?”
I stared at the floor. My heart told me to leap to action, but my head spoke wisdom. “Cashel is a good man. He will discover the truth. In the meantime, we have a ball to attend.”
Her mouth gaped open in an amazing but unladylike expression. “Ya canna be serious.”
I took hold of her hand. “The attack happened weeks ago. That letter has been chasing after us all this time. Chances are this girl is long gone by now so, the way I see it, this changes nothing for tonight. We’ll put on a grand show the likes of which my parents have never seen from us. We will dance, laugh, and enjoy each other’s company. Can I count on you to be my date for the evening?”
I couldn’t deny the idea of hurting my parents’ pride had a good deal of appeal to help distract me while Cashel headed to the north. I knew Taryn hated them because they’d turned a blind eye to the lorcan attacks. They lied to our people about being safe on this side of the Wall. Countless had died. Many more would soon enough. But tonight couldn’t be about them. It was about us. The game we played must be perfect.
Parents or not, the king and queen were treacherous and had no right remaining on the throne. I intended on fixing the wrongs of my parents...with Taryn at my side.
“So ya want me to lie to your parents about falling in love with ya? Is that it?”
“Do you have a problem with that?” I asked.
I watched as she thought for a moment about what that would mean. Faking attraction to me wouldn’t be hard. We both knew I’d caught her staring more than once. And the nervousness we both felt being in bed together earlier had been real enough. But how far would she be willing to take it? Would she hold my hand? Share a kiss?
“Hell no. I’d even go to breakfast dressed like this if you’d let me just to get a rise out of your ma.”
“I almost wish you would, if only to see her face.” I gave her a once-over that lingered long enough to make her smile. “Come. There is much to do.”
Chapter 4
Taryn
Unlike the ball that changed the course of my life not so long ago, Connor’s party would be quainter in nature. Less than a hundred people received invitations. Each one chosen for their ability to spread gossip with as much skill as my own ma. When I emerged from my room later that day, I saw girls of varying ages, lingering in the hall. Each dressed in flowing gowns, dripping with gems and stuffed into tight corsets. My own was currently digging into my ribs with a great deal of discomfort.
“Don’t fidget,” Aed warned under his breath as he led me down the hall towards the ballroom. “It will only serve to let everyone know how uncomfortable you are.”
“It’s too tight,” I groaned and forced my hands back to my sides. “I canna breathe in this horrid contraption.”
Aed pursed his lips to hide his amusement as we approached the towering wooden doors held open for us. The song faded away and a man stepped forward. With a booming voice, he announced our arrival to all those already inside. The applause was far more boisterous than I had expected. Connor led it himself as he and his stunning wife, Deirdre, came to meet us.
“Well, aren’t you a vision, m’dear.” Deirdre smiled as she fingered the pale pink feathers resting on my shoulders. They made me want to sneeze and itch at the same time.
“She is.” Aed’s hand wrapped around my hip and pulled me close.
My breath caught for a second. Thankfully, I remembered our plan in time to stop myself from slamming my heel down on his foot in response. He was just playing his part. Isn’t he?
“Your home is...great.” I looked up at the vaulted ceilings. Each plank of wood a different colour, creating a patchwork of beauty the likes of which I had never seen before. Wood was prominent here, but no matter how warm and rich its tone was, I missed the dismal grays of Eimear’s stone. Not to mention people not gawking at me. Well, not every person, at least.
Deirdre arched an eyebrow at my comment and I flushed. I should have listened better when Aed tried to prep me for this introduction while a servant worked on my hair. Darn it. Why hadn’t I focused more?
“Hadley is looking stunning tonight,” a voice called from over Deirdre’s shoulder and I tensed. Aed’s fingers flinched against my hip as his father appeared.
I’d already decided Hadley had to be adopted. She had none of her father’s ruddy appearance. In fact, she reminded me so much of Tris that my heart ached with missing my friend. With gorgeous blond curls, brilliant green eyes, and a smattering of freckles that plunged deep into the low cut of her emerald dress, I’d have to be blind not to notice the similarities.
“Father,” Aed said with a dip of his head in greeting for the both of us.
I wanted to scowl at the wink he shot Deirdre, but Aed’s tight grip helped me keep a stoic expression as I bowed, showing him an honor he did not deserve. It was the best I could do, considering I’d much rather shove a sword through his chest than offer him platitudes.
“My, Hadley will make a beautiful queen someday,” Connor boasted. He dipped his head to Morrigan out of respect as she joined us. “Of course, she will struggle to compare to your beauty, my queen.”
The king glanced at his wife and then dismissed her, but not before casting an obvious glance of appreciation at Deirdre. Or rather the egg-sized ruby nes
tled in the hollow of her throat.
“Our children will make beautiful babies for the realm one day. Don’t you agree, Prince Aed?” Connor said.
My eyes widened with shock at the lord’s forwardness, especially with me standing right there. Aed only nodded.
“It is an honor to consider such an option. I thank you for allowing Hadley to be one of those among the candidates. Though I am sure you will agree that Taryn will make no less a fine match for me. She is, after all, the woman of my choosing.”
A bright tint of red flooded into Connor’s cheeks as Aed reminded him that his daughter was among several with no claim to his throne. I grinned at Morrigan’s narrowed gaze and Deirdre’s gasp.
Aed bowed low. “If you will all excuse me, I’d like to dance with my betrothed now.” And with that, he led me towards the dance floor.
“Well, that was a bold move.” I laughed.
“As was his insinuation.” Aed wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me close.
“Wait! Ya canna be serious about dancin’ with me! Ya know how horrible it went the last time.”
“Aye. But I won’t deny that I like having you in my arms. Besides, my poor feet have recovered from your last blundering.”
People turned to watch us as he steered me towards the dance floor. There was no music to dance to yet. The musicians flipped through pages of sheet music, confused. They were unable to find an alternate first dance that included me in it. “You promised Hadley the first dance, remember?”
I didn’t like the way people were looking at us. Nor did it take a genius to see that Hadley’s temper tantrum on the sidelines was not as private as Connor would have liked.
“I do.” He smiled and waved at Hadley as Connor pulled her away. “Which is why I’m reminding her I’m not a man who bows to the whim of a mere woman.”
When I bristled at that comment, he dipped me low. His gaze ran slow and intimately down the plunging neckline of my dress. The exposed flesh there was suddenly becoming the same shade as Deirdre’s necklace. Heaven help me, he does have a way about him.