by T L Swan
“You know I can,” she replies.
My eyes hold hers. “I wouldn’t know if he’s a hot fuck because we don’t have sex.”
Her face drops. “What?” she whispers. “I thought you two would be at it like rabbits.”
I shake my head in embarrassment. “No.”
She screws up his face. “So… he didn’t?”
I shake my head quickly. “No.”
“But you two are all over each other in the common room.”
“I know. It’s all for show so the other guys don’t try to take turns of me. Mac said if he staked his claim on me that they wouldn’t challenge him.”
“Fuck,” she whispers in shock. “It’s true, they wouldn’t dare.” She puts her hands over her mouth and shakes her head. “How in the hell do you make out with him the way you do and not go back to the room and fuck his brains out?”
I shrug. “I don’t know.”
She screws up her face. “Do you want to?”
I shrug. “It’s ridiculous.” I pause for a moment. Why am I telling her this?
“You can trust me,” she whispers.
“I’m disgusted that I am attracted to someone like him. Someone who kidnaps and kills people.”
Angela nods. “Hmm. He only kidnapped you because the others would have killed you on the spot. Kidnapping girls is not his style at all.”
I watch her for a moment. Can I believe what she says? “I just need to see the next couple of weeks out and get the hell out of here alive.”
“You will.” She replies quickly.
“Do you think they will let me go?” I ask.
“Mac has final say around here. What he says goes and if he has said you are safe then you are safe.”
I nod as I lie back and inhale the vitamin D.
“Why don’t you just…” she hesitates.
I glance over at her. “Just what?”
“Why don’t you just enjoy him?”
I frown. “What do you mean?”
“You are on this ship for a few weeks. You’re obviously attracted to each other. Just go with it and have fun. This will all be a memory soon and you will be back in boring suburbia and he will be a hot guy who saved your life that you will wish you had of slept with when you had the chance.”
I shake my head and smile softly. “I don’t just go with it.”
“And where has that got you.”
I frown.
“Up until now, you have not gone with it and where has it got you? Are you happy? Is your body sated?”
“But—”
She cuts me off. “There are no buts. If you want him, take him.”
For another hour we lie like lizards in the sun and I watch him like an eagle while he works out. Angela’s words are ringing loud through my head on repeat. Why am I being so self-preserving? What am I expecting? A marriage proposal from Prince Harry or something? Maybe I should just go with my gut and let myself make the most of this time. What have I got to lose? I’m disappearing from life in a couple of weeks. With every exercise he does, another dirty image crosses my mind of the devious things I imagine he could do to me—What that sinful body is capable of. I don’t know if it’s the sun or the oil drizzled over me, or the damn hot body of his wet with a sheen of perspiration, but I am feeling very overheated by the time he comes out to get me.
“You ready to go?” he asks as he towers over my deckchair.
I glance up and see his hungry eyes drop down my near naked body and then back up to meet mine as he licks his lips.
I smile and hold my hand up for him to take in his. He pulls me out of my chair and I take my dress and towel in my hand. “I’m going to head back, Ang. See you at dinner?” I ask.
“Okay.” She smiles as she watches us intently.
We turn and walk to the staircase when Mac’s hand drops to my behind as I open the door. “A gentleman would open the door for me.” I smirk.
He bends and gently kisses my lips. “A gentleman cannot multitask, and at this moment, this gentleman’s mind is on your ass in that white bikini and the things he could do to it.”
I smile into his lips and kiss him again as his hand tightens on my behind. He squeezes hard and my hormones start to pump. For a moment our eyes lock. He takes my hand back in his and we continue toward our room as my heart thumps hard in my chest. What is this?
Does he feel this attraction like I do?
I don’t want to go in. I want to stay out here and play along with him touching me for a while. His hands feel so good on my skin.
We arrive at our door and I glance up the corridor toward the common room. “Do…” I hesitate. God, do I sound needy? “Do you want to go up to the common room to get a drink or something?” I ask.
A trace of a smile crosses his lips and I know that he knows exactly what I’m playing at. “Okay. Can you wrap your towel around you?”
I glance down at myself.
“I’m not putting on a show for my work mates. Your body is mine only to look at.”
A rush of excitement that shouldn’t be there shoots through me and I smirk, wrapping the towel around my chest as we continue down to the common room.
He walks behind the bar. “What do you want to drink?” he asks. I glance around. This is the first time I have been in this room when it has been completely empty. Not a soul is here.
“Scotch,” I murmur. I know he remembers ordering me that drink so he liked the taste of my kisses the other night. I wonder will we kiss now? He pours me a Scotch and Coke and then pours himself an iced water. “You’re not having a drink?” I ask, surprised. He’s not working tonight.
He shakes his head as his dark, sexy eyes hold mine. “I’m not drinking tonight.” His eyes fall down to my lips and back up to my eyes.
“Why not?” I ask.
He raises an eyebrow. “I have other plans.”
“Like what?”
“Let’s just say…” He pauses for a moment. “I want my reflexes to be razor sharp.”
I swallow the nervous lump in my throat. “Oh,” I murmur.
He picks up our two drinks and walks over to the large double lounge and pulls a coffee table over next to it, placing the two drinks down. He then lies down with his back to the high side of the lounge and pats the lounge in front of him.
“Lie down with me?” he asks in his husky voice.
I swallow nervously. This is weird. I know we are only playing along, but this feels different. I lie down nervously on my back and he places his hand tenderly on my stomach through the towel before he leans up on his elbow above us.
“Did you enjoy your workout?” I ask nervously. He smells so damn hot.
He bends and kisses my shoulder softly. “Yes,” he whispers into my skin.
I feel the air leave my lungs and I troll my brain for something intelligent to say. His hand circles on my stomach and I stop breathing all together. He bends and kisses me softly on my neck and my eyes close. God, he feels so good.
He kisses me again.
“Do you have any idea how fucking edible you look in that bikini?’ he whispers into my ear.
I smile into the side of his head. “No, why don’t you tell me about my bikini?” I murmur as my eyes close.
I feel him smile into my neck and I bite my lips to hide my groan. “It’s not the bikini that’s making me crazy.”
“What is it?” I breathe.
“You.”
I smile. “I’m making you crazy?”
“Insane,” he whispers as he takes my lips to his. His tongue gently swipes through my open mouth and he kisses me deeply. Holy fuck. I can feel his erection grow up against my leg and I have to concentrate to keep my legs together.
This is insane. “There is nobody here. We don’t have to play along,” I whisper into his mouth as my tongue dances with his.
“I don’t want to play along anymore, Rosh.” He kisses me again before his mouth drops back to my neck.
“What do yo
u want?” I breathe. He’s so damn good at this.
“I want you to want me for real.”
I can’t hold myself back and I grab the back of his head and pull him down to me. The kiss is deep and passionate and hell, if it isn’t the best kiss I have ever had. His hand slips underneath the towel and roams across my naked stomach and up to my breast and then down across my hipbones.
Lower, lower. Oh, fuck. Touch me lower.
Our kissing turns desperate. He is half on top of me and I can feel his huge erection digging into the side of my leg.
“Tell me you want me as much as I want you,” he whispers against my lips as his hand rubs back and forth on my skin. “Tell me.”
Unable to answer through my arousal and his lips all over me, I nod. I do want him. Hell, I want him right here on this lounge right now.
“Say it,” he breathes heavily.
I pick up his hand and place it over my sex. “Touch me,” I whisper. “Touch me for real.”
7
His eyes roll back and he slides his hand down the front of my bikini bottoms and my legs instinctively open. His large, strong fingers slide through my wet flesh.
“Fuck, yeah,” he whispers to himself as his eyes close.
Oh God. My head rolls back into the lounge chair. His lips take mine with renewed purpose. “You’re so wet, baby.”
I try to control my erratic breathing.
He slides one of his large fingers into my body and we both inhale in pleasure.
“How’s this?” he breathes onto my lips as he pumps his finger in and out. My knees lift slightly and I am suddenly aware that we are in a public place.
“The towel. Put the towel over us,” I whimper.
“Let’s go back to the room,” he murmurs.
I shake my head. “No. We will stay public for a little longer, thanks.”
He smiles darkly into the side of my face. “You scared of what I’m going to do to you when I get you alone?” He bites my shoulder blade sending goosebumps up my spine.
His big lips take mine and my back arches off the lounge in arousal.
Holy fuck. “A bit,” I murmur.
“You should be. I have never wanted a woman so much.” He pushes three of his huge fingers deep inside of me. I moan and tense up.
“Relax. I got you, Rosh. I won’t hurt you.”
He kisses me gently again, and sensing my fear he keeps his fingers still as he allows my body to acclimate to his intrusion.
I nod softly as I try to calm myself down.
“You’re not used to big men, baby?” he asks as if concerned.
I shake my head nervously. “No.”
He smiles into my lips as he kisses me. “It’s going to be fun teaching you how to take me.”
My eyes close. Fucking hell, what am I getting myself into here? His frigging fingers are huge and hurting and they are nowhere near the size of his cock. Maybe this is a bad idea.
What the heck am I doing?
I pry my legs open as far as they can go and lift my behind a little to allow him greater access.
“That’s it, Rosh,” he whispers reassuringly. “Lie back and enjoy it. Let me relax you a bit.”
He carefully slides his fingers out and then pushes them back in, making me moan in approval. He sits back and slowly pumps his fingers as he watches my face in awe.
“Does that feel good, baby?” he whispers.
“Yes.” I nod as I kiss him gently, a rush of excitement running through me. I love it when he calls me baby. “Too good.”
He kisses me as his perfect fingers go to work and the sound of my body’s wet arousal hangs heavily as we lie in the silent room. His erection is digging through the muscle in my leg and he grinds it against me slowly.
My breath quivers and I have lost all coherent thought. His fingers work harder, more aggressive, and each pump is deeper than the last. I kiss him aggressively.
“You are so fucking tight and ready for my cock.” He growls.
He picks up the pace and my mouth hangs open as the lounge rocks almost violently. Oh my God, oh my God. I start to quiver and place my hand over the back of his as it pummels through my flesh. I can feel the muscles flex in the back of his hand.
Sensing how close I am, he smiles against the side of my face. “That’s it, Rosh.” He kisses me. “Give it up for me, baby.”
His thumb swipes over my clitoris as his fingers dive deep and I lurch forward as a stronger than hell orgasm steals my ability to speak. I jerk, my body shuddering around his fingers as he tenderly kisses me and brings me back to Earth.
My heart is hammering through my chest when he kisses me softly. No aggression, no arousal, just soft, sweet kissing. That was perfect. He’s perfect.
“Can we go back to the room?” he whispers into my cheek.
Oh shit. My face falls.
A frown crosses his forehead. “Why did your face just fall?”
I sit up nervously as my arousal high instantly disappears and is replaced by fear. I shake my head. “It didn’t,” I pant.
“I…” I hesitate. God, this sounds so lame. “I just want to take it a little slow. I’m not…” I stop myself I don’t want to sound like an idiot.
“You’re not what?”
“I’m not used to this sleeping around thing. I know you are, but…”
He kisses me. “I would really like to go back to the room and get rid of this hot mess in my pants. You can watch.” He raises a cheeky brow to sweeten the deal.
My eyes widen. “You would let me watch you get yourself off?”
“Yes. Why not?” He seems surprised that I would find this odd. I have only had a few partners and I know I am not super experienced, but I have never been in the space where a man has jacked off in front of me. A thrill of excitement runs through me as I realize he has the confidence to have no physical hang ups. Our eyes stay locked. Holy crap. He just may be the hottest man on the planet.
“What will you do?” I whisper.
He smirks sexily. “I’m sure I will think of something.”
I smile as I stand, and we kiss for a moment as he rewraps the towel around my chest and holds me in his strong arms. His pager goes off.
“Fuck’s sake,” he whispers under his breath. After reading the message, he rolls his eyes. “I got to go to work for a bit. I will walk you back to the room first.”
We walk hand in hand until we get to the door and we turn and face each other.
“I shouldn’t be long.”
I feel like I am being walked home by my cute first date and I have that butterfly feeling in my stomach. I lean in and gently kiss him. I run my fingers through his two-day growth and my hand lingers on his jaw. “See you soon,” I whisper.
He kisses me again and then again and he smiles as he scrunches his face up. “Screw work. Let’s go inside.”
I laugh. “Go.”
With a sigh and a roll of his eyes, he pecks me quickly and is striding up the hall and out of sight.
* * *
I stand on the chair in the bathroom as I try to catch a glimpse of myself in the smaller than small vanity mirror. I turn and look at my behind in the tight black dress. After Mac left this afternoon, I paid Ang a visit and borrowed one of her dresses. I don’t know if I’m delusional, if I have cabin fever, or whether I am just going plain batshit crazy, but I feel like tonight is a little different to my other nights on the ship.
I’m nervous. I’m excited. I’m petrified.
I have never lived like this, thrown caution to the wind and not thought about tomorrow. But this afternoon was so, so nice in his arms, and I think Ang is right—I have spent my entire life saving myself for nice guys and honorable men and they have all treated me like dirt. They lied to me, cheated on me, not to mention robbed me of my self-respect. I’m done with it.
I’m done with being the victim. I’m taking back control of my life right now.
Mac’s bad—a criminal, even—but he has saved m
y life and offered me protection when I desperately needed it. In two weeks I will be gone and nobody will be able to find me, not even him. So I’m going to take the solace of his warm arms and the feeling of safety he gives me for the short time while I can.
God knows I am going to be on my own for a long time after this in fucking Puerto Rico.
I glance at the clock on the wall. Where is he? He has been gone for a few hours and he said he wouldn’t be long. I put the chair back and straighten the bed linen and fold and put away our clothes that have come back from the laundry this afternoon. I go back into the bathroom and check how I look again. Bloody hell, maybe he won’t even be coming to dinner?
I take a seat on the bed and stare around at my surroundings. Dead silence. No television, no radio. How does he stay sane in this environment for so long on his own? No wonder he’s always horny.
A knock sounds at the door. Why is he knocking? I open the door to see Ang standing in front of me. “I came to get you for dinner.”
My face drops. “Where’s Mac?”
“Apparently something is going on. I don’t know. The boys aren’t back yet, either. Chelsea said she saw them and they said to go without them.”
“Oh, okay.”
“Hopefully everything is alright,” she mutters as we walk down the hall.
“What do you mean?”
“Stuff happens on this ship.”
“Like what?” I frown.
“Well…you know what kind of ship this is and some seedy characters fly in and out. I know a helicopter came in this afternoon. I hope the exchange went well.”
“Oh,” I mutter, distracted. God. “Has anything ever happened before?”
“A guy got killed once. He tried to rip off the dealer and they shot him dead.”
My eyes widen in horror. “Fuck,” I whisper. “Who was that?”
She shrugs. “Some idiot who worked on here. I didn’t really know him. Apparently he was shifty.”
“Who shot him, I mean?”
She shrugs. “I don’t know. One of them.”
“Mac? Was it Mac?” Is he really capable of this kind of stuff?