“And the third cycle?” Shana questioned, staring at the chart with feelings of both fear and excitement. What he was saying made sense, but would it help her?
“There are only two cards in that cycle that appear to involve the past,” he noted. “The first is The Lovers—a struggle between sacred and profane love. Aric loved Terza, but he must have had some feelings for Moira. If he hadn’t, she wouldn’t have been able to insinuate herself into his life. Then there’s the last card in the cycle—The Empress. Moira had every reason to believe she was pregnant when Aric killed her. You also have every reason to believe you’re pregnant.”
“And the last cycle?” Shana asked reluctantly, fearfully, because she suspected what he was going to say. She wasn’t wrong.
“If it truly is a parody of their lives, then it has to end with Ryan trying to destroy Moira, just as Aric destroyed her. And, of course, you have to die.”
“Why do I have to die?” Shana asked, an involuntary shiver of fear racing through her. Before the feeling could take root, she forced it back down. If she was to beat Moira, she had to be strong. Fear would make her weak. “Ryan is sure it’s his soul Moira’s after, so my death would be pointless.”
“It wouldn’t be pointless at all,” he replied. “Remember, you’re repeating a parody of their lives, and Moira killed Terza, Aric’s true love. You’re Ryan’s true love, and the cycle can’t complete itself if you don’t die.”
“Of course!” Shana declared in chagrin. “I should have seen that all along. But why are we repeating the cycle in the first place?”
“The key is in The Lovers card—a struggle between sacred and profane love,” he answered. “As I said, Aric must have had some feelings for Moira. I suspect she felt his feelings were strong enough to make him choose her over Terza. Since mating with mortals was forbidden, she evidently decided to bargain with the dark forces and have him transformed into a warlock. “However, when Moira negotiated with the dark forces to change him, she had to make a deal of her own,” he continued, stopping to look at her. “Remember, during the regression, Aric said that if he did not accept the bargain, the dark forces would claim her soul and she’d spend eternity in unrest. But Moira was too smart to endanger her soul for eternity, so I think she made sure she had a loophole.”
“What kind of a loophole?” Shana asked.
Staring toward the trees, he rubbed a hand against his jaw. “I suspect that she agreed that if Aric chose Terza over her, she would surrender her soul. But only if she would be given another chance to make him choose her over the woman—or, in your case, the witch—he loves in the future.”
“In other words,” Shana said, “to be freed from eternal unrest, she has to persuade him to choose profane love—her—over sacred love—me. Since the deal she negotiated for Aric was for five hundred years, we can assume that the dark forces agreed to give her that chance, but only after she had served Aric’s time. That’s why the cycle is repeating itself now.”
“Exactly,” Sebastian said with a nod.
“There’s only one thing that bothers me,” Shana said. “I assumed that Aric had reincarnated because when he killed Moira, she was pregnant with their child. Since killing his child is the greatest sin a warlock can commit, and Aric was essentially a warlock at the time, then it makes sense that he would return to atone. However, if your theory about Moira’s bargain with the dark forces is correct, then Aric didn’t have a choice in the reincarnation. He would have come back, even without the child’s death. Could the dark forces do that? Could they force him to reincarnate just so Moira would have a chance to release her soul?”
“Yes and no,” he replied. “The death of the child would, of course, guarantee that he would come back to atone. But if that was his only sin, he could have come back at any time, settled his karmic debt and moved on. That he returned now—the end of the five hundred years he would have served if he had accepted the bargain—suggests that there was some element in his relationship with Moira that condemned him. My guess is that it’s because he took the powers she gave him.”
“But he didn’t want the powers,” Shana objected. “During the regression, he kept saying that he wanted her to take the powers back.”
“You’re overlooking one of the fundamental doctrines of our race, Shana. What is given must be given back. Moira couldn’t take the powers back. He had to give them back.”
“Are you saying that because he didn’t say something like, ‘I don’t want your powers, here they are,’ the dark forces sentenced him to giving Moira another chance?”
“Basically, yes.”
Shana shook her head in bewilderment. “That sounds so unjust, because it was really just a matter of semantics. Aric didn’t want the powers, and the dark forces should have accepted his demand that Moira take them back as proof of that.”
“Ah, but are you sure that deep down he didn’t want the powers?” Sebastian countered. “Remember, Aric told you he was tempted by Moira’s offer to give him powers, because it would make him a better healer. When he told Moira to take them back, it wasn’t because he felt it was wrong for him to have them. It was because the powers frightened Terza. If he did have an inner desire to keep the powers, then that would have been enough for the dark forces to uphold their bargain with Moira.”
“This is all so complicated,” Shana said with a heavy sigh. “But if I’m understanding you correctly, to defeat Moira, Ryan has to choose me over her. If he does that, then the cycle will be broken, and his soul will be free?”
“Maybe not,” Sebastian hedged with a troubled frown. “I think Moira may have managed to give herself another loophole, so that the cycle has a chance to repeat again, even if Ryan does everything right.”
“What loophole is that?” Shana asked in alarm.
“The wishing wand,” he answered. “You said that it was normally on the third floor of the repository, and you didn’t know how it got to the first floor. Logic says Moira made sure he had access to the wand. Since he was set up by Moira, the wand won’t punish him for the first wish, because he didn’t consciously choose to use it. However, he did choose to use it the second time, and the wand will make him pay for that wish.
“But how would that give Moira a loophole?” Shana asked, completely baffled.
“The wand will only grant a wish if a person has something important to lose. In Ryan’s case, I can see two important things he can lose. His eternal freedom from Moira and you.”
“And?” Shana whispered hoarsely, not liking the turn of this conversation at all.
“And Ryan’s only saving grace is that when he used the wand, he wished for the knowledge and magical skills to save you from Moira,” Sebastian noted. “That was not a selfish wish, so the wand will probably give him a choice between what he is going to lose, rather than arbitrarily take something away from him.”
“You’re saying that he’ll be given a choice between eternal freedom from Moira or a life with me?” Shana gasped in disbelief.
“I’m afraid so,” he answered. “I’m sure Moira thinks he’ll choose to stay with you, and she’ll have a chance to claim his soul in another lifetime.”
Shana stared at him aghast. Then she surged to her feet and glared at him. “You’re wrong. It wouldn’t be fair for him to fight Moira and win, only to have love taken away from him.”
“He won’t necessarily have it taken away,” Sebastian pointed out, with a shrug. “He can choose to stay with you and have this lifetime of happiness.”
“But if he does that, he will have to fight Moira again. Next time, he might lose and condemn his soul to eternal unrest. That wouldn’t be fair,” she reiterated, as panic took life inside her. Could she and Ryan come this far, only to lose each other? No! She wouldn’t—couldn’t—believe that.
“To you, it doesn’t seem fair. But we’r
e talking about the dark forces, and they have a very exacting scale of balance,” he said with a heavy sigh. “Ryan chose to use the wand, even though he knew the penalty for doing so. Now, he’ll have to pay the price.”
“You’re wrong!” she insisted again, hating the frantic pitch in her voice. “As you said, it wasn’t a selfish wish, so that can’t be the price he’ll have to pay.”
“Our debating the issue is moot, Shana,” he said tensely. “We’ll only know who’s right after Ryan has fought Moira. If he’s successful, you’ll have your answer the moment the last card drops. If the images on the cards remain visible, then you’ll know that Ryan has defeated Moira forever.”
“And what will happen to the cards if he hasn’t defeated her forever?”
“They’ll fade back to black. Then Ryan will have to make a choice. You, or the eternal freedom of his soul.”
As the ramifications of what he was saying hit her, Shana felt her world tilt. Ryan was her mate, and she would love him until the day she died. But if what Sebastian was saying was true, there was no way she could stay with Ryan if it would endanger his soul. But she was pregnant with his child. Could she deny him his right to fatherhood? Could she deny their child its right of a father? Could she . . .
She forced herself to cut off the questions surfacing, reminding herself that Sebastian was right. Until it was over, neither of them would know what payment the wand would exact. She also knew she didn’t dare dwell on the matter. It would distract her, and she had to focus all her attention on beating Moira.
“Why is Moira delivering the cards?” she asked instead. “When I first started receiving them, I thought she was just deviling me by letting me know that she was in control of my future. But now I’ve received two cards without any taunt from her. That tells me that she must be compelled to deliver them. Why?”
Sebastian stood and stuffed his hands into his back pockets. “My guess is that’s her punishment for masquerading as Terza to mate with Aric. As I said, the dark forces have a very exacting balance. She had agreed to surrender her soul if he chose Terza over her, and she tried to finagle her way out of it by tricking Aric into mating with her. That upset the balance, and now she must allow you and Ryan to have a certain amount of equal footing in this cycle.”
Shana considered his answer before asking, “Can you tell me why the coven members’ names would be important in all of this?”
“The coven members’ names?”
She nodded. “When I asked Oran why Moira became obsessed with Aric, he told me he couldn’t answer the question. I asked him if the answer was important, and he made me recite the meaning behind why all our names begin with Mor.”
“Why would he think that’s important?” Sebastian murmured. Then he began to recite the reason behind the names, just as she had done with Oran.
Shana absently listened, and she gasped when he said, “When you add thirteen, fifteen, and eighteen together, you come up with a total of forty-six—”
“That’s it!” she interrupted excitedly. “Oran wasn’t talking about the names. He was talking about the premise behind them—the numerology. But how does it apply to Moira and Aric?”
“That’s simple,” Sebastian answered. “Moira has to claim a soul at dawn 183 days after she’s released. Add those numbers together, and you come up with twelve. Add the one and two together, and you come up with—”
“Three!” Shana finished triumphantly. “And that’s symbolic, because all things consist of three parts—a beginning, a middle, and an end. Her beginning was her obsession with Aric. Her middle is her revenge with Ryan. And the end will be the fate of her soul. But why was she given 183 days? Why not just three days?”
“The dark forces were rich in ritual and symbolism, Shana. They had you release her on Samhain—the beginning of our New Year—and the battle is culminating during Beltane, two of our Greater Sabbats.”
“That explains her time frame, but why did she wait until the last minute to start the battle? Oh, don’t even bother answering that,” she said, waving her hand dismissively before he could respond. “If Moira had taken more time, Ryan and I would have had more time to figure out what was going on, and we would have had a greater chance of beating her.”
“Right,” Sebastian said.
“But why did the dark forces want Aric’s soul for 500 years? That’s the numerology equivalent of the primary number five and has to do with male sexuality,” she said, frowning.
“Oran said it had to do with her obsession with Aric. Aric told you that Moira was engaging in dream-lovemaking with him. He said that he tried to resist her, but he couldn’t.”
“Of course!” Shana said. “When we find our lifetime mate, we never have sexual feelings toward any other person. I’d forgotten that mortal relationships have not yet reached that sanctified state. So, even though Aric loved Terza, he desired Moira, and the dark forces would have considered that his downfall. Thus, the number five, with a couple of zeroes added for good measure.”
Sebastian nodded. “Do you have any more questions? If not, I think you had better get back to Ryan. He’s been brushing against my mind for the past several minutes, trying to get a fix on us. Moira delivered a card to him, and he’s convinced that your talk with me is going to get you killed. He’s becoming extremely agitated.”
“She gave him a card?” Shana gasped. “Was it The Emperor in the upright position?”
“Yes.”
“So I was right to come see you,” she said, glancing down at the list of cards that were still missing—The Hanged Man, Judgment, and The World. Sacrifice, release, and success. But whose sacrifice? Whose release? And whose success? Would the cards be upright, or would they be delivered in the reverse position, creating different meanings? The World, reversed, would mean only partial success. That brought her right back to the question of whose success.
“Thank you, Sebastian,” she said, hurrying toward the trees. “Would you mind connecting with Ryan and telling him I’ll meet him at the house?”
“I’ll take care of that. And good luck, Shana. I’ll be praying for your success.”
“Thanks,” she called, not bothering to look back. “I have a feeling I’m going to need all the help I can get.”
“DAMNIT! WHERE is she?” Ryan raged as he slammed his hand against the frame of Shana’s open front door.
He stared out at the woods, quelling the impulse to go out and search for her. Even if she wasn’t trying to elude him, he had no idea which direction she had gone. Why had he let her talk him into casting the shielding spell? If he just had contact with her mind, he could find her and bring her back before Moira could get to her.
For what seemed like the hundredth time, he closed his eyes and tried to connect with this Sebastian guy. If he could get a fix on him, he could then track Shana. But, as had happened with all his other efforts, he no more than touched the warlock’s mind than some kind of a mental wall came between them. Was Sebastian keeping him out, or was it Moira? Not that it mattered because both answers were equally disastrous. If anything happened to Shana . . .
Unable to complete the thought, he pulled from his T-shirt pocket the Tarot card Moira had delivered. Maybe if he stared at the image of Sebastian—The Emperor—while trying to reach him, it would help him connect. He concentrated on the card while projecting his mind, but it didn’t make any difference. As soon as he touched the warlock’s mind, the wall went up.
With a violent curse, Ryan spun toward the room, crushed the card into a ball, and threw it to the floor. It hit, bounced once, and began to open. By the time it fell back to the floor, it was in its original state.
“What the hell?” Ryan muttered, bending to pick it up. As he examined it both front and back, he shook his head in disbelief. It had no folds or crinkles on its surface. It was as if he had never crus
hed it.
“Well, I’ll fix you,” he stated angrily, ripping the card in half and then into fourths. He tossed the pieces to the floor but even as they fell, he watched them come back together. When the card landed, it was in perfect condition.
Swallowing against the fear stirring inside him, Ryan again picked up the card. He wasn’t sure why he found his inability to destroy it so frightening. It was, after all, from Moira’s enchanted Tarot deck. It made sense that it was indestructible.
But if the cards are indestructible, then what chance do you have of defeating Moira? This is where she exists, and if you can’t destroy where she exists, how can you possibly destroy her?
As doubt began to overwhelm him, he shook his head. He could defeat Moira. He had to defeat Moira. If he didn’t, then Shana would die, and he couldn’t—wouldn’t—let that happen.
Frantically, he dug his cigarette lighter out of his shirt pocket and flicked it. As a flame shot up, he held it to the bottom of the card. He sighed in relief as it caught fire. Then he realized that although the flame was creeping toward his fingers, the card remained unscathed.
Stunned, he automatically dropped the card. By the time it hit the floor, the fire was out and the card was still in perfect condition.
He was so focused on the ramifications of what he was seeing that he started when a voice suddenly echoed in his mind, This is Sebastian. Shana is on her way home. She said she’ll meet you at the house. She’s fine.
Where is she?! Ryan demanded, latching onto Sebastian’s mind before he could break off.
She’s on her way. Just wait for her.
I am not going to wait for her! Tell me where she is!
For a moment there was no response. Then his mind was flooded with an image of a path that began at the section of woods where Shana had disappeared. It ended at the top of a hilly ridge that overlooked a steep, rocky ravine. Ryan’s heart skipped a beat, and then resumed in a terrified cadence. He knew that ravine. It was the same one in the vision he’d had of Shana lying at the bottom of it, bruised, broken, and dead.
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