Luci's Lullaby

by Leaona Luxx

  I check the extra bathroom but still don’t find them. I tap the bedroom door before walking in, in case she’s changing. “Charlee?”

  As I scan the room, I see the bathroom door is ajar. “Charlee?”

  “Hello?” There’s a pause. “Alden?” she calls from the bathroom.

  I walk in like usual but nothing is as it seems. One damn thing’s for sure—Charlee is one helluva beautiful woman.

  “Hey, you two.” Charlee looks like a deer caught in headlights as she sits in the tub with Luci on her chest.

  “Oh my god, what’re you doing?” she yells, jerking the curtain closed. Never in my right mind did I think she’d be in the tub… naked.

  I throw my hands up. “I thought you were bathing Luci.”

  “I am, but I wanted one too,” she says through the curtain.

  “I see that.” Damn, if I didn’t see that.

  “Ass!” she huffs.

  I chuckle. “No, I didn’t see that.”

  “No, but you have before.” Okay, see here she thinks she’s getting me, but she’s not.

  “I sure the hell have and I might add, it’s a damn fine ass.” No, really. That’s what I said.

  “Get out!” She hisses.

  I lean against the sink. “Don’t mind me, it’s nothing I haven’t seen before.”

  “Starting things we’re not going to finish is a bad idea,” she mutters.

  My cock grows at the thought of being between her legs. “Oh, honey. I’d damn well finish and so would you.”

  She peeks from behind the curtain. “Are you leaving or am I going to get out and give you blue balls to deal with?”

  “I’ll take my chances.”

  Her eyes narrow. “Go!”

  “I’ll just grab Luci for ya.” I take a step toward her.

  Her eyes widen. “Alden!” I grin and walk out. “Dork.”

  “You like it!” I yell as I’m pressed against the door.

  “Kinda.” She giggles, putting a really big smile on my face and a hard cock in my pants.

  “Lord help me, I may kill this man before the night’s over.” I stand from the tub, holding a slippery Luci tightly against me.

  I wrap her in a towel and tuck one under my armpits so it covers me. I peek out the door to find Alden leaned against the wall. “Shit!”

  He laughs. “What?”

  “Why are you there?”

  “Waiting.” He grins coyishly.

  I hold Luci out as best as I can. “Here, get your daughter.”

  I don’t even think when I say it, but the second it’s out there I can’t take it back. To my surprise, he doesn’t even hesitate.

  “Come here, baby girl.” He takes her in his arms and instead of leaving like a gentleman, he takes it one step further. “Charlee?”

  “What? I’m getting cold.”

  “You’re standing in front of the mirror.” His eyes smolder. “It’s still the best ass I’ve ever seen.”

  My eyes widen as I reach around trying to cover myself. “ALDEN!”

  “Gotcha.” He winks and saunters away.

  I slam the door, whirling around to find no mirror behind me. “Asshole.”

  In all of the back and forth with him, my shirt and shorts I sleep in got wet. I grab my robe and tiptoe into the bedroom. The door’s shut, so I make quick work of my clothes.

  I wiggle into my panties and go in search of his clothes. “Please do not let me find any kinky shit in here.”

  I pull drawers open, looking for a t-shirt and shorts. I find a WVU t-shirt big enough to cover my ass and pull it over my head.

  “Now, where do you keep your shorts?” I yank on drawers until I find some boxer briefs.

  “Lord have mercy, I hope I don’t catch anything.” I take a pair out and something falls to the floor. I step into the legs and hike them up. I grab the material I dropped and realize they’re panties.

  “Ewe, yuck!” I touched skanky panties. I drop them in the drawer and shake my hand. As I close it, something dawns on me. “Those are MINE!”

  I get them out again so I can take them home. I turn and stop. “Why does he have these? Does he collect them?”

  My face flames and before I can stop myself, I’m storming through the house with suspect panties in hand. I round the kitchen corner to find him fixing a bottle. Luci must be in her crib.

  He turns with a smile, I rear back and hurl them in his face. “What the fuck is this? Do you have a stash of panties from all of your conquests?”

  He’s caught off guard and juggles them as he tries to gain control. His eyes burn a path up my body. When his lips part, I can see it in his eyes… I might just be in for more than I counted for.

  “How did you find these?” He’s calm, but the storm brewing in his eyes makes me wary.

  “My clothes are wet, I needed some.”

  He steps closer to me. “Maybe you should wear these, they’re my favorite.”

  “I-I don’t understand. Why do you have them?” I stammer.

  “I took them off you.” His words are low, raising the hair on my arms.

  I swallow hard. “I remember, but why did you keep them?”

  “I wanted them.” He crowds me against the counter.

  My pulse races as the heat from his body warms mine. “You wanted them?”

  “They’re yours, I wanted to keep them.” He wads them in his hand. “Do you want them back?”

  My brows pull tight. “Is this part of some sick panty collection you have?”

  “I only have yours.” His eyes burn with desire.

  My breath hitches. “Oh. No, you can keep them.”

  “By the way, I want the ones you have on.” He shoves the purple ones into his pocket.

  I blink rapidly. “What do you mean? I’m not taking them off.”

  “You won’t have to.” Desire pools in the exact pair of panties he’s wanting.

  “O-okay.” I wet my lips because they’re the only thing on my body that’s dry.

  He leans in, running his nose from my jaw to my ear. “You’re the best thing I’ve ever tasted.”

  “Yeah?” My breasts heave as his words send me spiraling in a fit of desire.

  “You look so fuckin’ good in my clothes; the only other way I like you is without clothes.” His lips brush my earlobe.

  I shudder, drowning in his words. “Alden…”

  A cry from the bedroom makes me jump, and I step away from him. “I’ll get her.” He grazes my arm with his as he walks past me. “By the way, your nipples look amazing in my shirt.”

  I throw my hands over my chest, gulping for air. My lungs feel as though they’re going to constrict from lack of oxygen.

  “I’m in so deep.” I bury my face in my hands.

  Pulling myself together, I start picking the house up. I have to do something to keep my mind busy and work out the knot in my stomach. I settle on the couch with my Kindle, reading one of my old favorites.

  “What’cha reading?” Alden falls down into the seat beside me.

  I cock my brow. “The Scarlet Letter.”

  “Terrible book, pick another one.” He grimaces.

  “It’s a classic.” I glare at him.

  He wrinkles his nose. “They were all prudes.”

  “The word is Puritans.” I leer at him. “Not everyone is so cavalier about their sex life.”

  He glowers. “You still believe I’m screwing whatever I can? After all this time?”

  “It’s not been that long,” My eyes dart to his. “Some people don’t have sex for years. Some people only have one or two partners.”

  “You’re telling me you’ve only had sex with a couple people?” He lifts a brow.

  I writhe in my seat. “Yes, I’m not ashamed of it.”

  “How many times have you had sex?” He studies me as I wriggle.

  “I’m not telling you.”

  “All I’m trying to say is no, I’m not proud of my past. I was stupid, mean, and ha
d no respect for them or myself. If for one second I had any thought things would go this way, I would’ve never been with all those women.” The corner of his mouth turns down.

  I pick at my nail. “I know I’m old-fashioned, but I didn’t mean to make you feel bad.”

  “I only feel this way because of you.” He grimaces as soon as he says it.

  I’m taken aback. “I apologize, I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

  “I’m saying everything wrong.” He rubs the back of his neck. “What I’m wanting to say is that I’m okay with not being a horn dog anymore.”

  I stare at him, trying to work out his words. “What the fuck does that mean? It’s easy having me around because you can control yourself?” I race from the couch and make a dash for the bathroom.

  “Wait, Charlee!” he growls as I turn the corner.

  Tears fill my eyes, I’m so confused. What does he want from me? I’m here. I’m being friends. Then he pulls that shit in the kitchen and decides to tell me he’s found self-control since I’ve been here.

  “Hold up.” Alden’s on my heels. “Wait, Charlee. Damn it, woman, why am I always chasing you?”

  I whip around to get in his face. “Don’t you dare insult me and then ask me to stay.”

  “Insult you? I was talking about me and how I don’t want to be known as a man-whore!” he growls.

  “You were? I mean, you don’t?”

  “No, Charlee. I don’t think it’s a great idea to be raising a little girl with a revolving door of women in my bed.” He winces. “Excluding you, of course.”

  “Of course,” I say snidely.

  “Seriously? You’re the one who let me know it wasn’t right,” he argues.

  “Me? Because I said I knew you slept around?”

  He nods. “In part, yes.”

  I’m reeling at this point because I’m still so confused. “I don’t understand, everyone says that about you.” It’s out of my mouth before I realize it, and I can’t take it back.

  His face turns into stone. “I know that too. All I wanted to say was that’s not me anymore.” He turns to walk away. “You know, Charlee, you make it damn hard to be a better man when I know you’ll never believe I am.”

  I’m dumbstruck. There’s no fixing this. and I wouldn’t even know where to start if I wanted to fix it. “I fucked up.”

  Later that night, I’m feeding Luci when I hear Alden’s footsteps getting closer. I want to say something but don’t know where to start. How can I tell him he’s so much more than he even realizes?

  How do I tell him I’m falling in love with him?

  “Hey, I’m going to bed,” he whispers from behind me.

  I turn to look at him. His eyes are on the floor, and he doesn’t even look as he did earlier.

  “Alden, please look at me.”

  “It’s fine, Charlee. You don’t have anything to worry about. I know I have a lot of work to do for people to be proud of me.” He leans away from the door and finally walks away.

  “I’m such an ass.”

  I finish feeding Luci, clean her up, and get her to sleep. I peek in on Alden, hesitant to go lay with him. Just as I’m about to shut the door, I hear a sound. I ease closer to the bed and hear it again.

  It sounds as though Alden is crying. My heart shatters knowing he’s been trying so hard but can’t seem to get his grounding. I also haven’t forgotten I had a hand in this too.

  I sneak into the bed, scooting in behind him. I get against his back and wrap my arm around him. He releases a heavy sigh as I lay my head on his shoulder. His heart races, but he seems to relax.

  “I’m sorry.” I have no other words, and he doesn’t need them. He takes my hand, laying it over his heart. His hand never leaves mine. I stay awake, listening as his breathing slows and his body goes limp.

  Alden falls asleep in my arms.

  I don’t understand what’s happening anymore. The harder I try, the worse it all gets. I want—no, I need—Charlee to be proud of me. I can’t understand why she doesn’t see it.

  As life comes crashing down on me, I begin to crack. My mind won’t stop, and singing isn’t something I really have any desire to do. I want to give up on everything.

  I’m startled as the bed shifts. I know it’s Charlee, but I’m so lost in thought I didn’t hear her come in. She climbs in and scoots closer to me. The heat from her body warms me.

  When she slips her arm around me, I sink into her embrace. The love she so freely gives brings me to my knees. She calms my soul, helping me to find my center.

  “I’m sorry.” Her voice quivers with emotion.

  Taking her hand, I pull it over my heart. I don’t know if I’ll ever find the words to tell her how I feel, but I’ll do my damnedest to show her. I hold her hand there the rest of the night until we’re both fast asleep.

  I rouse to the coos and goos of my beautiful baby girl. As I peel my lids back, I come to a realization. “Women are badass. How in the hell do they cry their eyes out and function the next day.”

  I rub my palms into them trying to force moisture in them. My eyes are as dry as the desert. “Geez, I’ll just get drunk next time.”

  I drag my ass out of bed and through the house. I’m brought up short when I find Charlee rocking Luci as the sun beams through the window. She’s singing to her again, and my heart fills to the brim.

  “Mornin’.” My raspy voice barely comes out.

  Charlee’s face lights up. “Hey, handsome.”

  My heart stutter steps. “What are my two favorite girls doin’ this morning?”

  “I think…we’re teething.” Charlee frowns.

  “Is that bad?”

  “Well, it depends if I’m right and if you believe in old wives’ tales.” She giggles.

  “Isn’t she kinda young to be doing that?”

  “I’ve heard of some babies being born with teeth but no, she’s four months on Tuesday.” Charlee gazes at Luci like she’s a princess.

  I walk over to them, squatting beside the chair. “So what do we do?”

  “Nothing, we wait until we see one or swollen gums.” She giggles. “Or when she bites one of us.”

  “I’ll let you take that shift.” I smile at her. “How do you know all of this stuff?”

  “I helped with my brother and until I was old enough to start working, I was a babysitter.”

  Luci goos at me, and I reach for her. “I need to give you more time to yourself.”

  “Why? Are you trying to get rid of me?” A line forms between her eyes.

  I stand and walk toward the living room. “No, not at all.”

  “Then what’s going on?” She follows, sitting next to me.

  “Sam told me I have to go back to work; she wants me to start playing weekends.”

  She studies me. “You want to?”

  “I’m not sure what I want when it comes to music, but I do know I can’t just leave Luci with anyone.”

  “I’m not anyone.” Her brows knit.

  “Charlee, I depend on you so much now. I can’t ask you to do more than you’re already doing.”

  “I want to, I love her too.” Her eyes glisten, and I get the feeling I’ve upset her.

  “If I know nothing else, I know you love her.” I grin when her face softens. “And that you have an amazing ass.”

  She slaps at me and dabs her eyes. “Don’t take her away.”

  “I’m not and if you want the job, you’ve got it.”

  “I want it.” She chews her lip. “Maybe I could take her to Mom’s or we could get another bed for her room. Like a twin bed.”

  “Why would we need to do that?”

  “You know, in case it would be better if I sleep somewhere else.” She bites her nail.

  “I like our arrangement now, don’t you?” My heart stops for a brief second waiting on her.

  “Yeah, it’s okay.” She shrugs. “Except when you snore.”

  “I don’t snore, do I?”

 
“Yes. Loudly.” I shake my head when she laughs.

  Friday evening comes way too soon for me. Anxiety eats me alive, and I hate the thought of leaving Luci. And Charlee. I wish things were different, but I know I need to do this if for no one else but me.

  “Does it get any easier?” I ask Charlee as I walk into the living room.

  She twists her mouth. “I don’t know, but I do know we’re going to be fine. So don’t you dare worry about her.”

  “You ready to roll?” Aksel asks from the door.

  I stare at Charlee as she smiles warmly at me. “Go get ’em, Beck.”

  “Thank you.” I lean in, kissing Luci. “Y’all be good. No boys are allowed in the house while dad’s gone.”

  “Dang it! There goes the house party.” Charlee pouts.

  “Ha, ha, haha, ha.” She rolls her eyes. “Keep it up, lady.”

  “We’ll be good, Daddy.” She grins, ramping up every hormone in my body.

  I brush her cheek with a kiss and whisper, “I like that, you may need to use it sometime.”

  “Well, then, you’ll love my use of sir.” She smolders when I lean away.

  “That’ll get you thrown over my shoulder and your fine ass smacked.”

  “Sorry, sir,” she murmurs.

  “Dude, we need to leave before you get her pregnant.” Aksel chuckles as Charlee’s face reddens.

  “We’re just friends,” we say together.

  “Yeah, I know.” He rolls his eyes.

  After my first set, I text Charlee.

  How are my girls?

  Good. ~C

  We’ve eaten and are getting ready for bed. ~C

  You’re going to bed without me?

  You didn’t say to wait up. ~C

  I hate they’re going to bed without me, but I like the thoughts of Charlee being in my bed waiting on me.

  You don’t have to.

  I will if you want. ~C

  Now I feel bad.

  It’s up to you.

  Make my mind up. ~C

  Go to bed, I won’t be in until after two.

  Oh. ~C

  Is that a problem?

  No, I wasn’t thinking. ~C

  It won’t be this late every night.

  No worries, we’re fine. ~C

  Shit. Think of something.