I already knew where this was going but tried not to laugh as I waited for her to finish.
“When she mentioned going to a wedding in Boonville, your daughter told her ‘my mama’s boyfriend is also getting married in Boonville.’ ”
“Girl, she’s lying. Tamara did tell me that she was running her mouth, but it wasn’t Reese in line. She said it was a dark-skin girl with long, dark hair and we both know it wasn’t Reese’s bumpy-faced ass because she would have remembered the bumps.”
“Girl, you’re probably right. It was probably Christa who was at the store.”
“Anyway, I asked Kenny if he called you and he said, ‘Nah, she doesn’t want to be bothered with me anymore,’ ” Kayla said breathlessly.
“Girl, he’ll be all right.”
“I told him I was calling you and he said to tell you that he wasn’t mad at you or Tamara.”
“Girl, I could care less if he’s mad. Tell him to send Reese my way. I got something for her ass.”
“She ain’t stepping to you.”
“She better not.” I chuckled. “So he won’t work on your car. Ha! She must have his ass on lockdown. I should call him and ask him to come over just to see if he’ll come.”
“You need to quit.”
I hung up laughing.
The next morning, I waited until I knew Reese had left for work before I called him. Kenny answered on the second ring.
“Hey.”
“Congratulations, boo-boo.”
He laughed and I could tell he was glad to hear from me. “I told you ain’t nothing changed but her last name.”
Uh-huh, and that’s why your ass can’t leave the house, but I didn’t want him to know that I knew. “I should be home by one. Can you come over?”
He hesitated for about five seconds before he started chuckling nervously. “I thought you didn’t want to see me anymore after I married Reese.”
I did say that, and if the bitch hadn’t called me I would have been true to my word. “Listen, do you want some of this or not?”
“I’ll be over.”
After work, I hurried home and went in the bathroom to prepare. I was determined to show him he had made a terrible mistake marrying her.
I showered and changed into something a little more revealing. A black negligee that I’ve been dying to model just for him. I sprayed on a little perfume even though he had asked me not to so he wouldn’t go home smelling like a woman. I slipped on a pair of high heels and moved to the mirror to fix my hair and makeup. The doorbell rang, startling me. Damn, he was fast! I opened the door and found the UPS man.
“Ma’am, I have a package for you.” I could see he was taking it all in. I pulled my satin robe closed, then took the clipboard and signed my name, and he handed me a small package that I noticed was from my editor. I glanced up and noticed that black Expedition parked across the street from my house. What the hell? I didn’t even care that I was wearing a short robe with very little underneath. Hell, I didn’t even care if the neighbors saw me. I stormed out of the house and across the street madder than a big dog. I was determined to know who the hell was calling me and stalking my house. Halfway down the driveway, I picked up a big brick and started to run.
“Hey, bitch! Yeah I’m fucking yo man. Now what?” I yelled. By the time I reached the end of the drive, the Expedition pulled off. I hurled that brick down the street and just missed the back bumper by a fraction.
I was huffing and puffing and screaming “mothafuckas” when I noticed my sixty-five-year-old neighbor grinning over at me. I looked down; my robe was open and one boob was hanging out. “Fuck!” I fixed my clothes and started up the drive just as Kenny pulled into the driveway. In this outfit my neighbor knew good and well what was about to pop off. Dammit! I told you I’m an undercover freak.
“What are you doing outside dressed like that?” he asked as he climbed out of his truck.
I was tired of playing games. “What kind of car does Reese drive?”
“Why?”
“Because I asked you a fucking question, that’s why!” I was shouting and drawing attention to myself, but I didn’t give a fuck.
He gave me a weird look. “She drives an Expedition.”
I froze. “What color?”
“Burgundy.”
I took a deep breath and then started laughing uncontrollably. I was so ready to beat Reese’s ass and it wasn’t even her.
He stepped closer to me. “Are you okay?”
“No, I’m not okay, but it ain’t nothing that a little dick can’t cure.” I turned on the heels of my stilettos and signaled him to follow me inside.
I closed the door behind him and dropped my robe to the floor. I swayed away, making the cheeks of my ass, which were hanging out the back of my nightie, bounce.
“Damn, where you get that at?”
I tossed a smile over one shoulder. “I bought it with the money you gave me.”
As soon as we reached my room, I kicked the door shut and helped shed his clothes.
“What were you doing outside?”
“I’ll tell you later. Right now I need you inside me.” I led him over to the bed. I didn’t need any foreplay, just a dick inside me. I removed a condom from my nightstand and slid it on, then lowered onto my back and spread my legs.
“You in a rush?”
“Yes,” I said, barely above a whisper. “I want all of you deep inside me, now.”
Kenny settled between my legs, lifted them over his shoulders, and drove in hard. “Yessss,” I cried. It had been almost two weeks since I last had some. He sent his whole length inside my pulsing kitty and I felt his balls rub against my wet lips.
He pulled out and sank into me again. “Damn, this pussy good.” He rocked, withdrew, and despite my protest kept pulling out, then sliding all the way in again.
“Oh, it’s so good. So damn good,” I cooed. I dropped my legs and let them fall wide open, giving him plenty of room. I reached down and wrapped my hand around the base of his dick and guided him deeper. His breathing became ragged. My hips rose faster and faster to meet his thrusts. My tongue licked one nipple and then the other the way he liked it.
“You’re gonna make me come,” he warned.
“Then we’ll come together.” He pounded into me, gripping my hips and driving even harder. I lifted off the bed and met his thrusts. “Kenny, yeahhhhh, baby, I’m fin to come!” I screamed as I came hard, releasing weeks of pent-up frustration.
He threw his head back and slammed the final thrust home, coming hard. “Fuckkk!” he said. A few more strokes and I squeezed hard and milked him of everything he had left.
He held me and I wrapped my arms around him, enjoying a few stolen minutes together because I knew it would have to end soon.
“I missed you,” he whispered against my ear.
“Really now?” There was no way I was going to let him know how miserable I have been without him.
We lay there for about thirty minutes before his cell phone started popping off. He groaned and rolled over. “That’s her. I guess I better get out of here.” He gave me a kiss on the lips, then rose and moved into the bathroom to clean up.
Reluctantly, I got up as well. My phone rang and I reached over and grabbed it.
“Bitch, stay away from my man!”
Okay, I’m mad again. “Bitch, I would if I knew who your man was. Either step to me like a woman or quit calling my fucking phone!” I slammed the phone down and Kenny came rushing out of the bathroom.
“What’s wrong?”
“Some bitch is still calling my phone telling me to stay away from her man.”
He looked nervous. “You don’t know who it is?”
“If I did I would have solved this problem a long time ago.”
I grabbed a pair of shorts and slipped them on while he got dressed. My mind was working overtime.
“You must be fucking someone else if their woman is calling you.”
I glared ov
er at his country ass. “Whatever, Kenny.” I reached for a T-shirt, slipped it over my head, and grabbed my flip-flops.
“Come on, tell me. Who else are you screwing?”
I was so sick of him. “How in the world can your married ass question what I do?”
He shrugged. “I just asked.”
“Then don’t ask unless you really want an answer.” I stormed out of the room, and by the time he made it to the living room I had the door open, waiting for him to go.
“I’ll call you later once you cool down,” he said, then brushed past me.
“Don’t bother.” I slammed the door behind him.
50
Renee
I carried a bouquet of spring flowers out to the cemetery. It was a beautiful day. I had always loved May. One reason being the weather was perfect enough that you didn’t have to run the heat or the air conditioner. The second reason why May was so special was that it was Lisa’s birthday.
I moved over to her gravesite and stared down at it. LISA RAE MILLER. LOVING SISTER, FRIEND, AND WIFE.
I lowered onto the grass and placed the flowers in a plastic vase that I had brought the year before. “Hey, sis. So much has happened since I last came to visit. Can you believe it? Kayla is getting married this summer. I am so happy for her. Danielle’s daughter is due any day now. Can you believe it? Danielle’s messing with some nut and me and John are getting a divorce.” I pulled my feet to my chest and talked to my sister for over an hour before I said good-bye. My eyes were red by the time I made it home. I pulled into the driveway and noticed a 300C parked at the curb. I went ahead and pushed the garage door down and moved inside. As soon as I walked in and dropped my purse on the counter, I heard the doorbell. I hurried to answer it and gasped at the person standing on my front porch.
“Hey, Renee,” John said.
“What are you doing here?” I can’t believe his down-low ass had the nerve to pop up at my door.
“I knew you would be in town this weekend because you wouldn’t miss your sister’s birthday.”
His fat ass was already pissing me off. “I asked why are you here?”
Not waiting for an invitation, John pushed past me and entered my house. “I need to talk to you and you’ve been ignoring all my calls, so I didn’t have a choice.”
“No shit. I don’t have shit to talk to you about.”
“Yes, we do.”
I closed the door and swung around. “John, what the hell do you want?”
“We need to talk,” he said, moved over to the couch, and took a seat.
“You should have thought about that before you decided to dip in someone else’s ass.”
“Can we let that go for a moment?”
“How am I going to let it just slide? That was some grimy shit. You had me fucking yo bitch. What the fuck? I’ve put up with all of your sexual issues over the years.”
He leaned forward. “What issues?”
“Your dick half worked. And all you wanted to do was play with my damn nipples. No matter how often I told you to stop, it didn’t matter. You still tweaked and tweaked and fucking tweaked! I thought I was going to lose my damn mind, but nooo, ‘he’s a good man’ everyone said, especially Lisa, she insisted that I stay with you. So I did, and look what the fuck it got me.”
I could tell I was starting to piss him off, and that is something that rarely ever happened. “I didn’t come here for this.”
“Then tell me. What the hell it is that is so damn important that you had to come all the way down here?”
“I’m HIV positive.”
“You’re what?” Oh hell no. I know I didn’t hear him right. Did that booty bandit just tell me that he was HIV positive? My anger suddenly fizzled like a helium balloon. “I’m sorry to hear that.”
“Renee, you need to go and get tested.”
I got defensive. “For what? I’m not fucking another man, you are.”
He took a deep breath. “Shemar doesn’t have it.”
It took me a few moments to register what he was saying. “I know good and damn well you’re not trying to say you got it from me.”
I could tell he was trying to choose his words carefully. “Where else would I have gotten it?”
I sprung from the couch and aimed blow after blow at his face. “I ain’t gave you shit! You sick fucker!” I screamed.
He grabbed my hands and pulled me down beside him. “I didn’t come here to argue. I just wanted to tell you so that you could get tested as well.”
“Ain’t shit wrong with me!”
Tears ran down his cheeks. “Please go get tested,” he pleaded.
“Get the hell out of my house!”
51
Renee
I was scared.
All I could do was think about all the men that I’d been with and those few times that I gave in to the moment and let the feeling dictate my behavior. Five times in the last three years. There was three times that I could remember that I didn’t even bother using a condom, and they were with men that to this day I couldn’t stand. Two were while vacationing in Jamaica. Landon. The rest while swinging with my husband. What in the hell was I thinking? I knew the consequences and the risk. I had read the pamphlets. Saw the statistics. HIV in black women was rising, and we can’t blame it all on down-low brothers. There’s also making bad choices. And I had made plenty, but fucking without a condom was even worse.
Please, Lord. Let me be all right.
It was the Memorial Day weekend, and I was so glad Tamara was with her dad and Quinton went to St. Louis with his friends. I know Alicia went with them, but I’m through trying to fight him. I know I can’t dictate who he sees. Besides, I have bigger problems.
I lay awake most of the night thinking about my life and wanted so badly to call my friends for inspiration, but I just couldn’t bring myself to share this news with anyone. I didn’t want anyone to know, at least not until I got my test results.
I prayed and read a couple of scriptures from my Bible. It’s a shame that we only call on the Lord when we really need Him. I know that, but I need Him now. If Lisa was alive, she would have told me to think of all of the things I have to be thankful for. Friends. Kids. A career. My sister fought cancer for years and eventually lost the fight, but not once did she let her illness control her life. She was a fighter. I remember once when she told me, “I’m not about to let this condition dictate the future of my life. Ovarian cancer is what I have, not who I am.”
That night I was sleeping soundly in my bed when the doorbell rang. I looked over at the clock and saw it was almost three o’clock.
Who the hell is ringing my doorbell at this time of the morning?
I got up and looked in the window and saw it was the neighborhood bag lady. Her eyes were wide and she looked like she hadn’t taken her medicine in a couple of days.
“What do you want?” I didn’t mean to yell, but it was too damn early in the morning for her begging.
“My mother had a stroke and I need money to go see her before she dies!”
I groaned. “I don’t have any money.” I think I had four dollars in my purse.
“I have to see her before she dies,” she pleaded.
“How much you need?”
“Twenty-two dollars.”
There was no way I was giving this woman that much money. I was starting to think that maybe she was on crack. I shook my head. “I’m sorry, but I don’t have it.”
“Oh no!” She started crying.
My heart started to bleed, but I just couldn’t be giving her that much money. Something was wrong with that woman. She was either on drugs or mentally ill. “You’ve got to stop going to people’s houses begging. It’s just too early in the morning. Please go home before someone calls the police.” She nodded with tears in her eyes and headed home.
I went back to my bed and couldn’t go back to sleep because she was heavy on my mind. It was a relief to have something else to think about other t
han my HIV test.
I got up and took a shower and was at work before eight. I was glad there was a report for me to type because it gave me something to do other than sit and think about my problems.
I left around one and went over to the health department to get my testing done, then headed to the grocery store and to pick up Tamara from her dad’s. I was taking her to get her driver’s license today.
She passed her test and I was so happy for her. Her car was sitting in the garage waiting on her.
As we pulled into the subdivision I spotted the bag lady sitting on her porch. As soon as we passed, she rose from her seat.
“Shit, I bet she’s on her way to our house,” I mumbled under my breath.
“Mama, she’s worrisome.”
We started unloading the car as fast as we could because any second I would see her coming around the corner. Sure enough, as I reached for the gallon of milk, I spotted her coming toward the cul-de-sac. I carried the milk in the house.
“Mama, you want me to talk to her?”
“No.” I shook my head. “I got her.” We moved to get the last of the stuff out of the trunk. Tamara started laughing when she drew near. I stuck my head in the car and started laughing too, then forced myself to stop and think of what excuse I was going to come up with now.
The woman moved up my driveway and I looked over at her long face. “Hello.”
“She died! My mama died!” Her shoulders slouched and she started crying hard. “I didn’t even get to talk to her before she died. I tried to get to her but I couldn’t.”
I never felt so bad in my life. I just knew there was no way I could deny this woman the twenty-two dollars she needed to go and see her mother before she was buried.
I sighed. “What’s your name?”
“Hattie. Hattie Woods,” she said between sniffles.
“Where is your mom, Hattie?” I asked like I had just found a child who had been wandering around a store lost and crying because she couldn’t find her mother.
“She’s in St. Louis. I need to catch the Greyhound.”
Careful of the Company You Keep Page 27