Paige was another matter entirely. Her life was one long drama – even making GCSE choices was turning into a daily argument, with Noel’s mild suggestions that Textiles and Tourism weren’t perhaps the most academic subjects she could take, causing an explosion of ‘You don’t understand anything!’. True Mel had been quite explosive at that age, but Paige was taking it to a whole new level. Most of her tantrums related to her phone, to which she was addicted. She was always on snapchat and ask.fm, neither of which Cat remotely understood. Every time she got to grips with a new technology it seemed to change, and she and Noel waged a constant and wearying war of attrition against it.
Ruby, who at ten, was still reasonably straightforward, was even more techie than Paige. It exhausted Cat to be constantly telling both of them to get off their phones, only to find Ruby ten minutes later hooked up with the iPad. Honestly, technology, it was the bane of a modern parent’s life.
Who was it who’d told her when she’d moaned about dealing with the difficulties of toddlers and babies, ‘It will get worse’? They’d been right. Despite the turmoil Lou Lou had wrought upon their lives, Cat found looking after her relatively uncomplicated. She went to bed when she was put there, was asleep by seven, and didn’t answer back.
Cat found a file for a Christmas cake that she’d come across a while ago, and printed it off, before starting to type, ‘Thinking about making a Christmas cake takes a lot of forward planning. In an ideal world, you should make it in October, but those of us with lives to live have been known to squeeze it in in November …’ without much enthusiasm. She felt so much less interested in the book now it wasn’t going to be a TV series. How very shallow of her. But she enjoyed the buzz of being in front of the cameras and was going to miss it.
Don’t be daft, Cat, she scolded herself. It’s only one show.
But what if it wasn’t? What if all her TV work dried up? After all, she was in her mid forties and a woman. Time and TV weren’t on her side. She felt it herself in her daily life. Whenever she was out with Lou Lou, inevitably all the talk was about the baby, and no one noticed her, but it was more than that. She knew her teenage self would be furious by her middle aged disappointment, but she never even got wolf whistled anymore. And last time she’d been in London, a man in his thirties had politely given her his seat in a manner which had made her feel both old, ugly and decrepit.
Useless to tell herself that looks didn’t matter; she had age and wisdom on her side. Useless to know that Noel still found her sexy. A TV director no longer thought she could cut it. She was getting wrinkles, going grey, wore glasses, and had an unsightly ring of tummy fat that resolutely refused to go. She felt fat, old and frumpy. And worse than that, she felt invisible.
Chapter Five
Marianne heard the key in the lock and Gabriel’s voice saying with false cheer, ‘Here we are, home at last!’
She got up from the sofa, where she’d been reading to the twins, to greet Gabriel, Eve and Steven, who had insisted on going to the hospital to pick his mum up. The twins followed Marianne curiously, and clung to her legs, looking at this strange woman whom they’d last seen some months ago.
‘Eve, how lovely to see you,’ Marianne said with forced enthusiasm, giving Eve what she hoped felt like a welcoming hug. The hallway seemed narrow and constricted. Suddenly there were too many people in it, and Marianne had a pang of trepidation about what they were doing. Was this really the right environment for Eve? But then again what was the alternative? She clearly had nowhere to go, and it wasn’t her fault she was ill. Giving Eve somewhere safe to come was the right thing to do, however hard it was going to be. Marianne and Gabriel had discussed it at length, and agreed they’d have to make the best of it. But it was a little odd having your husband’s ex to stay in the house they’d once shared.
Eve clearly felt the same.
‘This is weird,’ she said, looking quite nervy. Weight had never been an issue for Eve, but Marianne was shocked at how thin she had got.
‘I hope it’s not too weird,’ said Marianne, giving her as welcoming smile as possible and trying not to feel too concerned about the size of the enormous suitcase Eve had brought with her. Marianne’s heart sank. Just how long was Eve planning to stay? Gabriel shot a grimaced look at her, and she felt slightly reassured. ‘Come on, why don’t you come and sit in the kitchen and have a cup of tea.’
But as they walked into the kitchen, Dolly, who was one of the nosiest lambs they’d ever fostered, chose that moment to come out of her basket and investigate who was there. She came straight up to Eve and nibbled at her leg. Eve promptly screamed and threw her arms in the air, hitting Gabe so hard on the nose it started to bleed. While Marianne went to grab a tissue, Dolly took advantage of the confusion to bolt out of the door.
‘Dolly, no!’ shouted Marianne, but it was too late, the lamb was pelting round the hall causing chaos. In the space of seconds she had knocked over a couple of vases, and chewed some carpet. She took a quizzical look around her, and decided upstairs looked like a fun place to be.
‘Steven stop her!’ shouted Marianne, as she shoved some tissue at Gabe who was standing with his head back pinching his nose, while Eve continued to scream like a banshee.
‘Dolly, stop!’ yelled Steven as he went tearing after her, followed by the twins in hot pursuit, deciding it would be really fun to join in the chase. It took ten minutes, a lot of thumping and shouting from upstairs, but eventually Steven came back into the kitchen triumphantly holding a wriggling Dolly in his arms.
‘Got her!’ he announced with a victorious grin.
‘Well done,’ said Marianne, sitting a rather shaken Eve down. ‘Eve I’m so sorry about that. I forgot Dolly was in here.’
‘Why have you got a sheep in the house?’ Eve looked dumbstruck by such an idea.
‘We always have baby lambs in the kitchen,’ said Steven. ‘Don’t you remember?’
‘I must have forgotten,’ said Eve.
‘The mother died,’ said Gabriel, ‘so I brought her in. The twins love her. Sorry, I forgot you weren’t too keen on animals. She won’t be here much longer, once she’s weaned I’ll let her out with the flock again.’
‘It doesn’t matter,’ said Eve, with the ghost of a smile, ‘I’m sure I’ll cope.’
‘Why doesn’t Steven show you your room?’ said Marianne tactfully.
‘That would be lovely, thank you,’ Eve said, giving Steven such a radiant smile, Marianne could suddenly see why he was so devoted to the mother who had let him down pretty much his whole life.
‘Follow me, Mum,’ Steven got up with alacrity. He looked so pleased to see his mum, Marianne felt churlish for being so negative. It had been tough on him having Eve in hospital all this time, it would be good for him to have her here.
‘I’ll take your bags,’ offered Gabriel, who seemed to have succumbed to the smile too. Eve radiated a sort of helpless waiflike air. It was probably impossible for any man to resist.
‘Must practise that,’ muttered Marianne as they all disappeared upstairs to one of two spare bedrooms she and Gabriel had created when they’d had their extension done the previous year. It was left to Marianne to sort out some lunch and clear up after the twins. She tried not to feel like a skivvy, but it was hard.
And got progressively harder as the day progressed. Eve took to her room to lie down, as she was tired, and she’d apparently been told to rest. Marianne soon found herself in constant demand to make tea, bring up lunch and generally run around after her.
‘She’s ill, remember,’ Marianne kept telling herself between gritted teeth, but it was difficult not to feel grumpy, particularly as Gabriel disappeared off to the fields, once he’d seen Eve settled, before Marianne had had a chance to ask him to take the twins with him, something he often did on a Saturday. They were hyped up and overexcited by the new arrival (and Dolly’s rampage), and Marianne didn’t want to take them out and leave Steven alone with his mum. Though he’d coped with th
ings very well, he’d been very shaken up at Christmas, confiding in her that it was the scariest thing that had ever happened to him, ‘I really thought she was going to be stuck in the bathroom forever,’ he’d told her. ‘I hope she never does that again.’ When she asked him about it now, Steven kept telling her he was fine, but Marianne didn’t think it was fair to put him in a position where he might have to be responsible for his mum again.
So she stayed in, chucking the children out in the garden for half an hour so they could run off their energy, getting on with the jobs that needed doing, trying to put on a cheerful, welcoming face for Eve, and feeling deeply resentful of Gabriel.
‘So what do Ralph and Michael think about this new hotel business?’ Cat asked Noel. She’d heard from Pippa and Marianne that developers were looking at the fields next to them, and like them was concerned about the effects on her adopted home town. In the years since she’d been here, she’d grown to love Hope Christmas, as the unspoilt haven that it was. She’d hate to see that change.
‘They’re as appalled as the rest of us,’ said Noel. Noel’s employer, Ralph, and his nephew Michael, were passionate about sustainable development and Ralph had been hugely instrumental in preventing the building of the eco town a few years earlier, even though his other nephew Luke, had been all for it. If anyone knew about what was being planned it would be Ralph and Michael. They always seemed to have their fingers on very unlikely pulses. But not this time, apparently. ‘It’s all been very secretive. We didn’t even know planning permission had been applied for till the notices went up,’ continued Noel. ‘The trouble is the land belongs to someone who’s willing to sell, and quite entitled to do so.’
‘I suppose so. Pippa and Marianne are getting a campaign going,’ said Cat, feeling gloomy. ‘It’s not as if we even need a spa hotel here. There are plenty dotted about the countryside in old stately homes. This is the wrong place for it. The tourists who come here aren’t remotely interested in spa breaks.’
‘You sound like Pippa,’ said Noel, who like the rest of them had been strong armed into helping Pippa’s last campaign to save the respite care centre Lucy went to. ‘I take it you’re getting involved?’
‘Certainly am,’ said Cat. ‘Although I’m not sure I’m going to be able to help on the TV front like last time. I feel like I’ve disappeared off the face of the earth. Every single idea I’ve suggested to Anna recently, she’s thrown back. And no TV producer seems to want to talk to me. I’m beginning to think my TV career is over.’
‘There’s more to life than TV,’ said Noel, giving her a hug. ‘And at least you still have the books. There’s life in the old dog yet.’
‘Oi, less of the old,’ said Cat, hitting him playfully.
‘And on the bright side, last year you were moaning about being away from home too much, at least you’ll be here more.’
‘True,’ said Cat, thinking of the times when she’d complained about shoots taking her out of the house. ‘But I’m not quite sure I’m ready for retirement yet. Besides, we can’t afford it.’
‘Oh I don’t know,’ said Noel, looking at her in a deliciously flirtatious way. ‘You’re still young and seductive enough for me. If I could push for early retirement we could both be at home some more.’
He gave her a lascivious grin, and she hit him again. But she was secretly pleased. All these years together and they still fancied each other. That was something. The rest of the world might think she was invisible, but her gorgeous husband didn’t, and that was what really mattered.
‘Yeah, right,’ Cat said, laughing, ‘and who’d look after Lou Lou and pay for the kids’ uni fees?’
As if on cue, Lou Lou woke from her nap and started crying. Cat sighed. Sometimes it felt as if her life were going backwards.
‘This feels familiar,’ said Pippa as she, Cat and Marianne squeezed round a window table in the corner of Vera’s café, and Lou Lou slept in her buggy, clutching hold of her toy rabbit.
As usual the place was packed, and there was a lot of buzz about the proposed new development. Typically, the group of old age pensioners, who met in Vera’s regularly for a chat, were up in arms, led by the indomitable Miss Woods, who was a well-known character in the town. But to Pippa’s dismay, she’d heard one or two of the younger Yummy Mummy types – Keeley Jacobs and Angie Townley who Pippa always got muddled up as they were both dyed blond with high top ponytails, fake tans, long eyelashes and caked in make up – offer their support for the plans. They were newcomers from Birmingham, clearly missing city life and saying how great it would be to get their spray tans done in the new hotel. Pippa had assumed everyone would be against the development, and it was a bit of a shock to discover that wasn’t the case. It would make things harder for their campaign if there was support for it in the town.
‘It does, doesn’t it?’ said Cat, with a grin. ‘It doesn’t seem so long ago since we were organising how to save Lucy’s respite care. We won that campaign, we can win this one.’
‘I hope you’re right,’ said Marianne, ‘but this does feel horribly close to home. And I’m worried that a big firm like LK Holdings won’t really care what we think. Plus I’ve been talking to Vera, and she seems to think a lot of people are really for the hotel. It will bring work into the town. You know it’s hard for youngsters to get jobs round here, that’s why they mostly leave.’
‘Except that it probably won’t,’ argued Pippa. ‘It will be cheaper to bring in a load of Eastern Europeans than pay the locals. So it will destroy the landscape and not bring in any jobs. Double whammy.’
‘Faint heart never won against big builders, or something,’ said Cat. ‘Come on, we need to stay positive.’
‘Perhaps we should look at the impact on the environment first,’ said Pippa, ‘how it will affect the wildlife, that kind of thing.’
‘It just seems the wrong place for such a big hotel,’ said Marianne. ‘And probably too expensive for most people to go. I don’t see how it’s going to benefit the local community.’
‘According to Noel, who’s managed to bend the ear of someone on the council, it’s going to be aimed at the luxury end of the market – an exclusive leisure complex, with spa facilities, a top of the range golf course, and luxury villas to rent, plus the hotel,’ said Cat.
‘Why do I get the feeling you lot are plotting again?’ a familiar voice joined them, with a twinkle, a smile and a doffed cap.
‘Ralph, how lovely to see you,’ said Cat, giving him a warm smile. Ralph was the sort of person who always made you feel better about life, and he had the knack of turning up unannounced, with a plan in mind.
‘And you,’ said Ralph Nicholas, with a grave smile. ‘So, have you got very far? I assume you are talking about the luxury leisure complex?’
‘Yes we are. And not really,’ said Marianne, ruefully. ‘We’re not quite sure where to start.’
‘Perhaps you should approach the company direct, appeal to their better nature?’ suggested Ralph. ‘I do believe there might be an opportunity to meet some of the LK Holdings people at some meet and greets in the near future.’
‘And do what?’ asked Pippa.
‘I don’t know,’ said Ralph with a smile. ‘Three lovely ladies, a few easily flattered businessmen. I’m sure you’ll think of something.’
Chapter Six
‘It’s all right, I’m happy to babysit,’ said Eve with a bewitching smile. ‘Look on it as a thank you from me, for letting me stay.’
‘Well if you’re sure,’ said Marianne cautiously. She knew from the past that Eve could not always be relied on to look after Steven, could she really entrust the twins to her? She felt bad for thinking it, because Eve seemed so much better. She was taking her medication, going to regular counselling and had even put on weight. Being with the twins also seemed to be doing her good, she seemed to brighten up around them and was really trying hard. But still, Marianne couldn’t help fretting, and to her embarrassment, Eve picked up on her angst.<
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‘Please don’t worry,’ she said. ‘If I was feeling too ill to cope I would tell you. I wouldn’t want to be in a position where I couldn’t look after the children properly. Come on, it’s Valentine’s night and you two could do with a break. The twins are in bed. I’m just sitting downstairs. What could possibly go wrong?’
A lot, Marianne felt, but it seemed churlish to say anything. She looked anxiously at Gabriel, hoping he’d back her up.
‘Do you think it will be ok?’ she whispered, while Eve was distracted looking at the tv guide.
‘I think so,’ Gabriel whispered back, ‘she might not have been the best mum, but she’d never hurt anyone.’
Out loud he said, ‘Eve’s right, Marianne, we haven’t had a night out in ages. It’s really kind of her to offer.’
‘Yes, it is,’ said Marianne. ‘I suppose we don’t have to be out for long, and we’re not going to be far away …’
‘So we’re agreed,’ said Eve, ‘that’s brilliant. You two have made me feel so at home, I want to give something back.’
Which was such a sweet sentiment, Marianne felt even worse, and though she muttered something to Gabriel about her worries as they were getting ready, his response of, ‘I know she’s not been well, but Eve’s not stupid, she’ll let us know if she can’t cope,’ only served to make her feel unkind. God, was she turning into someone who was prejudiced against mental illness? She hoped not, but she couldn’t help worrying. If something went wrong it would never be meant. It’s just that Eve was by nature a self-absorbed person, and she wasn’t used to thinking about anyone else.
But Gabe was probably right, Marianne was worrying unnecessarily. If Steven hadn’t been away at school he could have helped out, but he was, and Eve was on hand. And she was really good with the twins, who enjoyed her company. They had taken to running up to her, calling ‘Evie! Evie!’ whenever she came in the room. Eve had a knack of getting on the floor with them and playing inventive games; in fact, annoyingly, sometimes she seemed better at it than Marianne. But then again, Marianne thought, Eve didn’t have anything to do apart from swan about all day, and was immediately taken aback by the bitchiness of the thought. Deciding she was being far too negative, she resolved that as they had the chance of a night off, she and Gabe should make the most of it.
Coming Home For Christmas Page 7