Eir rubbed at the cold spot in her chest, wishing it would dissipate. “Daegal and I... had relations, once,” she said awkwardly, not sure how to phrase things.
Calder rolled his eyes a little. “You made love to one another, yes. That was obvious when he brought you half-dead into the caves and proceeded to sit by your bedside for the next week.”
Eir blushed again. “Yes, well.” She coughed lightly. “I... I was Brynarr's,” she said. “When I was Frida, maybe I could have belonged to Daegal—one day, somehow. But I'm Eir. And Eir always belonged with Brynarr. I still have the scars from our soul-bond, and I know that those are never going to heal. No matter what magic I try to throw at them.”
Calder stopped walking, forcing Eir to stop as well and turn to face him. “Oh, Eir,” he said quietly, sadly. “I can only imagine how difficult it's been for you to try to begin your life again when–”
“I don't want your pity, Calder,” Eir interrupted gruffly. She shook her head. “It's just that… I like Daegal, all right? He was so good to me. But I ran off and messed everything up, and I slept with Brynarr even after I knew Daegal, and–”
“And Brynarr had a spell on you, and Brynarr was your soulmate,” Calder pointed out. “You can hardly blame yourself for sleeping with him, regardless of what your feelings were for Daegal.”
Eir was silent for a long moment. “I just...” She sighed and shook her head. “I don't know how Daegal is,” she said finally. “And I think it's better that way.”
Chapter 23
That evening, there was a soft knock on Eir's door. She sighed and pried herself off the sofa, moving slowly to answer it, wishing that whoever it was on the other side of the door would think that she wasn't home and just leave. She paused with her hand on the handle of the door, taking a couple of deep breaths and trying to pull herself together.
Then, she opened the door.
Daegal stood there, looking slightly uncomfortable. “Good evening,” he said.
“Hello,” Eir said in response, wondering what he was doing there. And wondering if she was going to be able to keep it together, because it was one of those nights where that hole inside her chest seemed like an insurmountable chasm, filling her chest, filling her entire body, making it difficult for her to even breathe.
“You look like death,” Daegal said, cocking his head to the side. “No offense. But Calder told me that you might.”
Eir winced and made to shut the door. “I'm sorry if Calder made you feel like you had to–”
“Hey,” Daegal said, sticking out an arm to keep her from shutting the door. “It doesn't matter what Calder said. I felt like I should check up on you anyway—I haven't seen you in days. And I know that the council has been driving you into the ground; I know that you're busy. But–”
“I'm fine,” Eir interrupted. “In fact, I was just about to head to bed, so–”
Daegal caught her hand, tugging her forwards, into the corridor. “Come here,” he murmured, pulling her into a careful hug.
Eir's breath caught in her throat, and she struggled not to cry. The last thing Daegal would want right now was her bawling her eyes out into his tunic. And the last thing she wanted right now was to have to explain to Daegal just why she was bawling her eyes out.
“It's okay that you slept with Brynarr,” Daegal said, stroking her hair, and Eir flinched away from him.
“Calder told you about that?” she asked, feeling disgusting.
“I already knew,” Daegal said, shrugging a little. “I just had some sort of sense that you had. Not a foretelling or anything like that, but when I saw the two of you together… Well, you're not the only one who can sense the energy in the air.”
Eir shook her head. “I just–”
Daegal caught her hands and held them together in his, looking deep into her eyes. “Eir, that doesn't matter to me,” he said. “You were soulmates; of course you were close to him. But I can't help remembering you in Groenthjal, standing up to Agnarr. And I can't help remembering our nights together. You drove me absolutely crazy—you're the most stubborn person that I've ever met. But I'd be lying if I said that I didn't love you.”
Eir blushed, ducking her head and dropping her eyes. She could remember how magic had sparkled along her system when they'd slept together before, and she wondered if that was a sign of something more.
“Let me come in,” Daegal pleaded. “We don't have to do anything you don't want to do, but let me come in. Let's talk. Let's get better acquainted. And then maybe someday...”
Eir stared at him for a long moment, considering. In the end, it wasn't going to hurt anything, was it? Even if it didn't ease the chill in her chest, it wouldn't hurt to have a friend—or possibly more than a friend. And Calder seemed to think it was a good idea…
She swallowed hard and then nodded, stepping back and leading him inside, her hands still clasped in his. “All right,” she said. “I'm not making any promises, but—all right.”
Epilogue
Eir applauded with the rest of her class as Marna managed to change her spoon into a flower in front of everyone. It was something that the girl had been working hard on for weeks now—coming in after class hours, even asking Eir for extra help on it. She just hadn't quite been able to get the technique down, and Eir had run out of ways to explain things to her. But finally, finally, something had clicked in Marna's head, and now here she was, proudly holding a daffodil.
She handed the daffodil to Eir with a flourish, a smug grin on her face. “For you, Teacher,” she said. “Told you I'd get it.”
“I never doubted you for a moment,” Eir said. It was a bit of a lie, but that was okay. She smiled widely at the girl and accepted the flower, setting it down with care at the front of her desk. “Anyone else have anything they'd like to show us today?” she asked the class. Everyone shook their heads, and she made a show of rolling her eyes. “All right, then—get out of here, you lot. I hear there's a celebration going on tonight or something...”
It was midsummer's eve, and Trandinga had brought back the traditional festivals in recent years.
There were a lot of changes that had been made since Brynarr's defeat, actually. She looked around her classroom, smiling to herself, and began pushing in chairs and cleaning every surface using quick, expert flicks of her wrist.
Three years ago, this would never have been possible. The school could never have existed in a Kjota that feared magic above all else. But now, you couldn't even walk down the streets of the capital without seeing some hedge witch out there performing in front of a crowd. You couldn't go to the healer's without being offered some sort of magical potion or a charm. And so on.
She was happy with the way things had turned out. And sometimes, when she stopped to think about it, she thought that Brynarr would probably be happy about things as well. Somehow, despite all of the chaos that he had caused, and despite all of the pain, Kjota had become more accepting of magic than ever before.
Brynarr would have had a place in this world.
Sometimes, she still couldn't help thinking about Calder's initial question, about whether Brynarr might deserve to have his soul healed rather than shredded beyond repair. If they had healed Brynarr, could this world still have come to exist? And would Brynarr have been happy here? Would he have been happy with her?
Ah, but there was something else in her life now, too. Eir turned towards the door, smiling as she saw her husband standing there. “You know, you don't have to come get me every day after classes,” she said, rolling her eyes a little even though she was secretly pleased to see him there nearly every afternoon. “I do know where our home is; I won't get lost if you leave me to walk home on my own.”
“I know,” Daegal said, grinning at her. It was the same conversation they had nearly every day. But he never changed.
“How were your classes today?” he asked her as he escorted her home, holding one of her hands in the crook of his elbow.
Eir smi
led. “Wonderful,” she said. “The kids were so great. And you'll never believe what Marna finally managed to do...”
Daegal listened to her tell the stories of her day, and then he shared his own stories—which weren't nearly as interesting, Eir though privately, given that all he'd done was sit in on another set of council meetings. But Daegal seemed to enjoy those meetings—she assumed it had something to do with growing up as a foster-son to a sea-king like Agnarr. Despite Daegal's own low birth status, he had basically been groomed to be a lordling from the time he was a child.
When they finally made it back to their home, Daegal wasted no time in pressing Eir back against the door and kissing her as though his life depended on it. He was gentle but firm with her, pushing into her so that their bodies were totally intertwined. He slotted a leg between hers, and Eir couldn't help but push down against it, needing friction.
When he finally pulled away from the kiss, she laughed a little, dropping her forehead against his collarbone. “It sometimes feels like we're still so young,” she said. “Or like we haven't seen one another in months.”
Daegal laughed as well. “The mark of a perfect relationship,” he told her. His face turned serious, and he tilted her chin up so he could look her in the eyes. “I love you,” he told her.
It wasn't the first time that he had told her that—not by a long shot—but every time he did, Eir could feel her heart do a little bit of a swoosh in her chest, just like it did when she was out flying around on the back of his dragon form and he went into a particularly sharp dive. Despite all of her initial misgivings, she had no worry about this—just like when they were flying, she knew that he would always be there to catch her if she fell.
“I love you, too,” she told Daegal, her voice soft. And a smile flickered across his face before he leaned in to kiss her again.
“We have the midsummer's ball tonight,” Eir groaned as Daegal kissed and sucked and nipped at the column of her neck.
“So?” he asked against her skin.
“So,” she said, pushing him away from her, “I have to get dressed.”
“It won't take you that long,” Daegal argued, moving back into her space. “Nor will it take me that long to finish what I'm doing here.”
Eir bit her lip in a futile attempt to hide her grin. For a moment, she let Daegal continue to lather her neck with small kisses—but then, she pushed him away again.
“I'm serious,” she said. “I have to get dressed. The festivities should be starting soon, and I want to see everything. This is the first midsummer's that I've managed to go to since...” She trailed off for a moment and cleared her throat. “Since the midsummer's festival where I met Brynarr,” she finally finished.
“It's about time you went to another one,” Daegal said, keeping his tone light even though she could tell he was a little concerned about her. “There's no other place except midsummer's festival to get queen's cake with strawberries—so I assume it's been decades and decades since you had some? Are you sure you don't want to get the orgasm out now, rather than embarrassing yourself in front of everyone?”
Eir giggled and leaned up on her toes to press one last quick kiss to Daegal's lips. “Not gonna happen,” she told him. “But maybe if you really impress me with your dance moves tonight, we could do a little something when we come home...”
Daegal raised an eyebrow at her. “I can take that challenge,” he said gamely.
A little while later, Eir emerged from their room wearing a soft white dress that fell in gentle waves around her curves. She had braided her hair back with ribbons, and Daegal was pretty certain that she had never looked so lovely before in her life.
“You look handsome,” Eir told him, reaching out to tug his sky-blue tunic a little straighter. She admired the line of his legs in his tan trousers as well.
“I don't even have words for how you look right now,” Daegal confessed, still gaping at her. “You just look... absolutely amazing. You're going to be the prettiest girl at the ball. If you hadn't already stolen my heart, I'd be in trouble tonight.”
Eir giggled and shoved him lightly. “You're just saying that,” she said.
“No, seriously,” Daegal said, shaking his head. He reached out to stroke back a bit of her hair, tucking it behind her ear and looking seriously down into her eyes. “I still don't know how I got so lucky,” he said.
Eir blushed and ducked her head. “Come on, let's go,” she said.
When they reached the castle lawns, there were already people scattered all around and kids running everywhere. There were a few different musicians scattered around the lawns, plus tables full of foods and beverages.
“Well, here we are,” Daegal said, gesturing grandly.
“Here we are,” Eir agreed, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly.
Daegal placed a hand gently in the curve of her lower back. “Are you doing okay?” he asked quietly.
“I will be,” Eir said, giving him a gleaming smile.
Just then, Calder came up to the two of them, his young daughter balanced on his hip. “Look, Jessa,” he said, his voice full of fake enthusiasm, “it's Uncle Daegal and Auntie Eir!”
Jessa held out her chubby hands towards her 'aunt', and Calder sighed with relief as Eir accepted the child easily. “I have to go find Rangvaldr; can you watch her for a bit?” Without waiting for a response (because he knew he didn't really have to), Calder darted off in search of Jessa's older brother, who was just at that age where he was getting into all sorts of trouble whenever he had the chance.
Later that evening, she was still holding Calder's daughter when the music really started going, with two fiddlers and a pipes player all coming together to play some lively dance tunes. Eir watched Daegal's foot tapping against the ground and finally urged him on, elbowing him in the side.
“Go on, then,” she told him, laughing. “Go dance. I'll join you in a short while, once Calder comes to collect his little one.” Said little one was currently napping on Eir's shoulder, otherwise she might have considered just dancing with the kid as well.
“Are you sure?” Daegal asked, looking uncertain.
That only made Eir giggle a little more. “Yes, I'm sure, Daegal,” she said. “Believe it or not, I can exist on my own. Now go—dance for me. Show me your best moves.”
Daegal gave her a quick kiss on the cheek and then hurried out to line up with the others. As he leapt and swirled and moved with all the grace of a slithering dragon, Eir couldn't help but smile. She took a sip of her mead and then gently stroked Jessa's back.
This may not have been where she had thought she would end up, back all those decades ago, but it seemed as though things had finally come full circle—only this time, rather than just dancing with the man she loved, she got to have everything she wanted: the man, the children, the profession, the home. It was something that she'd never had with Brynarr, and she realized she appreciated it all the more now given what she had gone through with Brynarr.
Calder finally came to collect Jessa and take both her and Rangvaldr off to bed, and Eir took that as her cue. She got to her feet, still watching the dancing, and then flung herself abruptly into the mix of things.
She and Daegal met and spun together, twirling effortlessly in time to the beat of the music. Above them, bursts of magic lit up the night sky, much to the pleasure and amazement of the crowd. No one worried that they were under some sort of magical attack. No one wanted to find those responsible for the display and exile them from Kjota.
No, she really couldn't imagine a more perfect world to be a part of for a while.
Thanks for reading!
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Seduction of the Bear (Bear Kamp Book 1) Page 25