by Kelli Walker
But as I watched her gaze pan over to me for just a moment, the icy stare in her eye would have never let on to the connection we had established.
Just as quickly as she had glanced over at me, she was back to staring out the window. She wore the outfit she dropped in with on Montserrat. Her beat up tennis shoes, her faded jeans, a tank top with a built-in bra and a long-sleeved army green coverall. Her smooth, shining hair cascading down the back of her head before it tied itself off in a bun at the nape of her neck. I committed every last part of her to memory. Took her in for as long as I could.
Because when we landed, she quickly picked up her backpack and strode off the plane.
“The white car’s for you!” I exclaimed.
I stood at the top of the airplane staircase as she turned and looked up at me.
“The white car that just pulled in. It’s for you. My driver will take you anywhere you want to go,” I said.
“You have multiple drivers, too?” she asked.
It was the first thing she had said to me since we boarded the plane five hours ago, and I memorized the sound of her voice.
“Maybe,” I said coyly.
“Rich people,” she said, shaking her head.
I watched the smallest grin tick her cheek before she turned her eyes back towards the car. And without another word, she walked towards it. I stood there, descending the steps as I watched her open the door. She didn’t even wait for the driver to help her out. She slammed her backpack onto the seat before she fell into it herself, and I watched as she pulled her leg in and reached to close the door.
She peeked out momentarily to take me in one last time, then the car door shut me off from her for good.
I settled my feet onto solid ground as I watched the white car pull away from her. My driver came over and gathered my small bag from the flight attendant, then he slid it into the trunk of the car. He opened my door for me and I got in, my eyes never leaving that white care until he turned the corner.
The thud of the door ripped me out of my trance and barreled me face first into the reality of my situation.
None of this was right. None of this was good enough. I knew the connection Val and I had created with one another was genuine. I knew there was a reason why she was pulling away. And I wouldn’t stop until I knew what that reason was. We had weathered too much and shared too much for this to be the end. We had grown too close and come to know one another too well for it to end with a car driving off into the fucking distance.
Leaving things the way they currently were wasn’t good enough for our story.
“Where to, Mr. Chambers?”
My driver looked at me in the rearview mirror as I reached for my seatbelt.
“Follow the car that just left,” I said. “Follow it until it stops.”
Valencia
I watched towering buildings and rundown office pass in my purview as I stared straight ahead. Pedestrians cursed us out when we tried to drive through green lights. Horns honed in every possible direction as the faint smell of smog wafted through the vents of the car. Home. Or the bastardized version of it, at least. It felt odd to be back. Had New York City been an organ, I probably would have rejected it. Opted to die.
I hated this place.
“Where to, miss?”
I looked over at my driver for the third time and shrugged. And I didn’t know where to go. I didn’t know what I should do first. At my office were a ton of missed phone calls and emails shouting at me about how people wanted refunds for classes that never took place. But at my apartment was… nothing. A void. A measly excuse for a home I had put together with the trash of others. The only pristine things in that place were the kitchen appliances, and even those had an odor to them. I had a couch with rips and tears that had sat out in the rain one too many times. An air mattress that had a slow leak in it. Chipped plates and mugs that had small holes in them I had filled time and time again with caulk I purchased at the hardware store down the road.
Other than that, there was nothing. No television. No food. No personality.
No Silas.
I shook my head. It was time to get back to reality. The billionaire went back to his perch to take a few more days off and I went back to my office. I had to. It was where I was needed. I couldn’t think about Silas anymore. I couldn’t afford myself anymore wasted time being the temporary consort of some rich man in the city. I turned my head to gaze out the window and craned my neck to take in how tall the skyscrapers were around me.
I wondered which one Silas worked at.
Hell, which one Silas owned was more like it.
“Miss?”
“Yes?” I asked.
“Are you hungry?”
I snickered and shook my head before I drew in a deep breath.
“I need to go to my office. You can drop me off and leave. I’ll be there for a while.”
“All I need is an address.”
I rattled it off to the man before he turned himself around. And soon, I didn’t even register the city passing me by. It didn’t matter. None of it did. The only thing I could feel is the sinking of my gut as I moved further away from him. Tears flooded my vision and I didn’t even notice until one dripped down my cheek. I brought my hand up to brush it away, then gazed at it and saw my reflection.
What in the world had come over me?
My heart felt as if it had been shattered. My soul felt empty. No, it felt emptier than empty. It felt dead. Black. Bleak. And all because of one man. I had no idea how he managed to slip past my radar. I had no idea how I managed to let him affect me like he had. But, he did. And now, I had to cope with it. I tried to push him from my mind as the driver pulled up to the curb. I tried not to pine after him as I grabbed my backpack. I tried to push and stuff my tears away for another time as I opened the door of the car, my watery gaze rising to look at the pathetic future in front of me.
The only future I had was with my classes. There wasn’t anything else for me.
“Do you need help with your bag?” the driver asked.
His voice ripped me from my trance and I watched him hold out his hand.
“No. I’m fine. Thank you, though,” I said.
But I did force myself to take his hand so he could help me out of the car. He steadied me onto the curb before he nodded his head at me, then went back around to his seat. He slipped into the pristine white vehicle and gave me one last look. Just to make sure I didn’t need anything. I saluted him mindlessly with my hand and he gave me one last nod, then I watched him pull away from the curb.
Leaving me standing in front of my small office shoved amongst all the shops of New York City.
I dug through my backpack and found the hidden compartment. I didn’t even give a thought as to the fact that my keys might have been lost on the island. Part of me hoped they were. I could look up Silas, tell him about it, and we could go back and look for them. Or, he would think I was crazy and just tell me to go to the hardware store and have another set made.
What the hell was wrong with me?
I unzipped the compartment and pulled out my keys as tears rushed my eyes again. I had to get a grip on my life. I had to rein my emotions in. My face grimaced and my nose wrinkled as my shaking hand slid the key into the door. I unlocked my office for the first time in almost two weeks before I tossed my keys back into my bag.
But I didn’t even get through the threshold before I felt a pair of hands come down onto my back.
I felt myself being guided with two strong hands through the doorway. My bag dropped to the floor as my office door slammed shut and I quickly pulled my knife from my back pocket. I whipped it open, forcing its blade into the light streaming through my windows as I whipped around on my heels. I poised myself for a fight. I prepared myself to do battle for the dusty, dank place I came to every fucking morning to make my measly paycheck so I could live another day.
But once my eyes fell onto the massive man behind me, my breath hitche
d in my throat.
“Silas?” I asked.
He pushed away from the door and came straight for me. His green eyes dug into mine as I backed up. I tripped over my own bag and my knife went falling to the carpet before my hands pressed into the wall behind me. My entire back fell into the wall and he stood in front of me. So close to me I felt his body heat beating against my skin.
“What are you doing?” I asked.
My eyes danced between his. My body screamed out for me. I curled my fingernails into the wall, forcing myself not to reach out for him. I blinked a few times, knowing my mind must have been playing tricks on me. I left Silas at the airport. Like I needed to. Like I had to.
But the face I saw in front of me didn’t change, no matter how much I blinked.
His body backed away from mine and I watched him fall to my office door. I felt my stomach lurch. Was he leaving? Without saying anything? Without explaining himself? I watched his hand reach out for the door and I took a step forward, peeling myself away form the wall. I reached out for him. My voice got stuck in my throat. I wanted to yell at him to stay. To tell him I wanted to talk. To spew all of the things that had been spinning around in my mind since we both woke up that morning.
I wanted to tell him that gazing up into his eyes in the morning was the most beautiful thing I had ever born witness to. I wanted to tell him that there wasn’t a second that went by that he wasn’t on my mind. I wanted to tell him about how scared I was. Not just in the jungle, but now. Because I’m not used to feeling this way and I’m not used to being close to people, even though I want to be close to him. I wanted to tell him that seeing him smile blows every natural beauty I’ve seen out of the water. That natural waterfalls and the colors they cascade are no match for the beauty of his emerald stare.
I wanted to fist his shirt and bring him close and make him never let me go.
“Silas,” I whispered.
My eyes fluttered up to his and I watched him grin. A telling, knowing grin. Like he had gotten what he came for. I watched his hand as it connected with the lock. Not the doorknob, but the lock above it. And the sound it made when he locked my office with both of us in it echoed off the corners of my mind.
He was staying?
“This isn’t where it ends for us, Val.”
His voice rushed over my body, forcing me to fall back into the wall with the force of his words.
“This isn’t how we end. You know it, I know it, and the rest of nature around us knows it. I watched it behind your eyes at breakfast. I watched it roll over her gaze during the entire plane ride back, and I saw it in your eyes when you looked back at me before you closed that fucking car door.”
I swallowed thickly as he took a step towards me.
“And if it makes you uncomfortable to say it, I get it. If it makes you worried for the future to admit it, I understand it. If you aren’t sure of what my reaction will be if you mention it, then that’s fine. But if you won’t say it, then I will.”
He closed the gap between the two of us and my neck craned back to keep his wondrous eyes in view. His incredibly predatory stare that had locked its sights onto me. Like a lion finding its mate. Like the head of a pride taking what was his.
He had chosen me, and I could see it in his eyes.
“Say what?” I asked breathlessly.
I watched him bend down and pick up my knife from the floor. I watched him slide his thumb across it, admiring the shine of its blade. I watched the sight of it reflect in the intensity of his gaze before he flipped it shut with such precision that it caused even my eyebrows to rise up on my forehead.
Then, he slipped the closed knife into my hand before he cupped the back of my head.
Silas
I saw the shock rolling over her features. I saw the way her eyebrows hiked at my comfort with her knife. I slipped it into the palm of her hand and held it there, then took my other hand and cupped the back of her head. I fisted her hair lightly. Calmly. So as not to startle her too much. The confusion and the storm drifting over her mind was seen clearly behind her eyes. Watching the way she reacted to me when I followed her into her office reminded me of the way she always had to defend herself. The way she always had to be ready to fight at a second’s notice. It reminded me of the strength she was forced to possess, even though she had let her guard down with me. Even though she had let me in to try and shoulder some of the burden of her world.
I held the knife against the palm of her hand as I gazed into her eyes. Her chest rose and fell with her anxious breaths and I watched that beautiful red tint rise up into her cheeks. She gripped her hand around mine, pressing the blade between our palms. It was a stark reminder of how she had to fight her father. How she had to fight nature on a daily basis simply to make ends meet. I looked into the eyes of the woman that had used that fight to save me. To keep me alive in a jungle that wanted to literally swallow us whole.
She kept me fed. She kept me warm. She kept me whole.
The knife pressed between our hands reminded me of how she even fought herself. The thoughts in her head and the demons that hung over her body. Watching her wield that knife with such quick precision reminded me that her instinct was that everyone was out to get her.
I, however, wasn’t.
After holding the knife against her hand, I took it from her. I watched her brow furrow in confusion as I slipped the folded blade into the pocket of my pants. I brought my hand back to hers and threaded our fingers together. The back of her hand found my lips as I kissed each and every knuckle. My hand slowly released her soft hair before it trickled to the nape of her neck. Helping to ease the tension it brought down upon her muscles to look up at me from such a drastic angle.
Then, I closed the distance between our bodies, pressing her against the wall with my pelvis.
“Silas,” she whispered.
“So long as I’m around, you’ll never need that knife,” I said.
“What?” she asked.
“So long as I’m with you, Val, you’ll never need it. You won’t need it to defend yourself from another person. You won’t need it to defend yourself from your thoughts. You won’t even need it to defend yourself from nature. Because just as you put yourself in harm’s way to save my life, I will do the same for you. Always.”
Her jaw dropped open in shock as my eyes danced between hers. I allowed those words to dawn upon her concious mind before a grin trickled across my cheeks. She hadn’t shoved me away. She hadn’t pushed me back from her body. If anything, I felt her legs trembling. I felt her growing weak. I unthreaded our fingers and slipped my arm around her, then held her against me. I stepped away from the wall as my hand slid through her soft, beautiful blonde hair. Then, I took that same hand and cupped her cheek.
And she fluttered her eyes closed at my touch.
“I would like to take you out to dinner, Valencia.”
Her eyes whipped open at my statement.
“You do?” she asked.
“I do. But not as a ‘thank you’.”
“Then… why?”
I smiled down at her as I took in the shock of her words. Such a sweet sound coming from the woman who wasn’t rattled by the fury of nature’s wrath.
“Because I want to spend time with you,” I said.
“You do,” she said flatly.
“Yes. I do. I want to spend time around you. I want to talk with you. I want to get to know you before taking you back to my penthouse apartment that overlooks the whole of New York City and pressing your naked body against the windows of my home. I want to gaze into your eyes. I want to feel your skin against mine in the morning. I want to wake up between your legs, devouring my breakfast before you eat your own. Those are my intentions, Val. And they all start with dinner.”
She drew in a ragged breath and I hung onto every hitched sound that came from the back of her throat.
“So, that’s what you want,” she said.
“That is what I want. I want y
ou. I want your memories. I want your stories and your scars and your sounds and your silences. And I know it’s what you want, too.”
“You do”
“Yes, I do. You’re good at reading nature, and I’m good at reading people. Just like you predicted a constant chain of events stemming from one sound five miles away, I can predict the mindset of one person with a single glance. And when you looked back, I saw all of it.”
“All of it.”
“If I say ‘yes’, will you repeat it and save us the heartache?” I asked.
She smiled as her head fell back into my hand. The sweetest laughter left her lips as I cradled her body close. I couldn't take my eyes off her. I didn’t want to. I never wanted to, if she would allow me the time.
The time to never pull away from her.
“Now that you understand my intentions and my motives, you know understand what I’m doing. So, with all that said, Val?”
“Yes?”
“Will you have dinner with me tonight?”
The simple nod of her head was all I needed. I fisted her hair and hoisted her body off the ground with my arm, bringing her lips to mine for a kiss. I backed her into the wall and her arms threaded around my neck, fisting my hair and clinging to my body. Her legs wrapped around my waist. My hands pressed into the wall behind her. Our tongues collided in a fight for the ages as heat rose up the back of my neck. I needed her. The taste of her. The smell of her. The presence of her. I wanted to coat myself in it. I wanted to drown myself in it. I felt her warmth against my pelvis as her hips rolled into mine. Her legs locked me against her as her hands ran down my face, cupping my cheeks and tilting my head off to the side.
I opened myself for her, just as she did for me. And slowly, she slid my suit coat off my shoulders.