CHAPTER 26 – THE NEW FIELD OFFICE
Felicity showed up at Carl Westmoreland's with clothes, plus gadgets that needed field testing. Dennis and Janice would need something to do, and Dennis had seemed keen on the latest technology.
Stolemaker thought the toys for grownups were a good half measure, but wished out loud that he could safely put Dennis and Janice to work in a way that would feel like real work to them. Say, on the Loomis case, or their own office work; anything to keep them off his case and out of mischief, but within earshot.
Felicity smiled. "We're one step ahead of you, sir. Carterson's rounded up components for a secure computer system, and has volunteered to be the hub, if you'd like some discreet screening done?"
"Absolutely," Stolemaker said. "But I'm not sure I've any right to set up such operations in a civilian's home, and I'm not even sure I've any right to ask."
"I could use a cup of coffee, if you'd like to take a minute to think things through, sir," Felicity said, after a curious half-glance at the door.
The chief turned, expecting to see someone, but the doorway was empty. He turned back to Felicity. "Who?" he asked.
Felicity sighed. "A girl can't get away with anything around you, can she? All right then, Mrs. Hugh left like she had to go ask someone something. Before I forget to mention it, Dourlein's lining up alternate hiding locations, should any become wanted."
"Not on my account, I hope," Hippo said, from the door. "I'm rather enjoying having company. What's this about wondering where to set up a base operation of sorts? Not that I wouldn't be happy to go stone broke for a good cause, but as long as you help cover some of the food bills and the electricity costs, I can't see any problem."
Felicity's face broke into a picture of delight. "As it happens, I have solar powered devices, plus a rooftop wind turbine to install if you'd like one. We're trying to learn how to disguise extra energy use, by seeing if we can provide just enough compensating generation without overdoing it. We're trying to make the meter readings seem absolutely normal, if you'd like to put it that way."
Stolemaker shook his head. "Sometimes I wonder why I bother to get out of bed. Every operation that I have going can run without me, plus they think up side games on their own."
"Oh, dear. He's not getting depressed, is he?" Felicity asked Hippo.
"It would be perfectly normal under the circumstances, but I don't think so," Hippo said. "So, tell me what you're proposing to do with my house, and I'll tell you if I'm willing to surrender part of it."
"We're still feeling our way," Stolemaker said, "but we need to keep Dennis and Janice out of the way and under someone's eagle eye, and Mrs. Hugh and I are the only team members available for sitting around playing raptors at the moment. We can pick up and move, of course."
"Your doctor doesn't like that idea. You're doing fine, but let's not be macho and ruin our luck, shall we?" Hippo said.
"I've brought gadgets that need to be field tested and Carterson has a special computer system he can hook up later today. He said he'd try to hurry, so any workaholics in our midst didn't go bonkers for lack of a full-size keyboard attached to something that takes commands," Felicity said.
Dennis stuck his head in the door. He was heavily whiskered and half-asleep, but was dressed after a fashion. "I seem to have been too tired last night to have made arrangements for clean clothes," he said to Hippo. "If you could point me toward an iron, or steamer, or something? Possibly?"
Felicity held up a chambray shirt and a better-than-average grade of casual slacks. It was the sort of outfit acceptable for wear in most offices, but tough enough for handyman work: a nice, multi-appropriate outfit, all in all. "For you," she said.
"That's awfully nice of you," Dennis said. He eyed the clothes with as much gratitude as he could muster.
Felicity laughed. "They're not Michael's. I think they'll actually fit. There's clean socks and such in the sack."
Dennis was much cheered, and went off to change.
Emma showed up, to see if she was wanted for any reason.
Janice appeared, wrapped in a blanket over her clothes, as if slept-in clothing was indecent. She muttered about having to come out of her bedroom instead of people coming to her. She cussed about how long she'd been kept waiting, and about clothes that didn't look like what she liked, now that she got a look at them. She tried to grab them away from Felicity.
Emma intercepted her wrist and forced her to back up. Janice looked at her with uncomprehending eyes.
Emma held her firmly. "You obviously haven't been well brought up, so I don't expect polished manners. But a little consideration is in order. Under no foreseeable circumstances will you use bad language again in Hippo's house. He might excuse you, but I won't. We're probably going to be cooped up together for a while for safety's sake. It won't do us any good if we snipe at one another, instead of working together."
She dropped Janice's wrist. Janice warily tried to grab the clothes.
Emma grabbed her wrist again. "Say thank you, first," she said.
Janice muttered something that might have been thanks. She was allowed to take her change of clothes and retreat.
"Annie Sullivan lives!" Hippo declared.
"Helen Keller's teacher, you mean?" Felicity asked.
He nodded.
"This girl's deafness is rather selective and voluntary," Emma said.
"So's her blindness, at this point," Hippo said. "Go get 'em, Annie, that's what I say, on all fronts. It's funny, even though I know better, I tend to think of her charge as mute before she got strict lessons. As memory serves, though, before she got civilized she made all sorts of animal noises, usually at inappropriate times."
"Who did?" Dennis asked, waltzing in, rolling up his sleeves and showing off that he managed to look rather sharp even in borrowed clothes and with a stubbled face. "How do I look?" he asked, like he didn't ooze that he thought he looked quite good for the circumstances.
"You look sharp," Hippo said, dutifully, and with a straight face despite his amusement at the young rooster strutting about now that he was getting his bearings. "And we were discussing Helen Keller."
"Oh, fascinating case history, that," Dennis said. "I wrote a thesis on it once. What brought her up?"
"We just kind of drifted into it," Emma said.
Stolemaker decided that he'd best move things along, before anyone started to elaborate on Janice's manners or lack thereof. "Dennis, we've managed to get you and Pendergrast officially reassigned to a highly-classified and therefore vaguely defined special assignment. I've been trying to pin down with Westmoreland whether we can set up here where we can watch each other's backs and keep an eye out for anyone showing an abnormal interest in Loomis's cottage, but we haven't got so far as making any decisions yet."
"I have," Hippo said. "For one thing, you're not ready to move quite yet. And for another, I'm not the sort of man to turn down a wind turbine experiment." He winked at Felicity.
Felicity led Dennis outside to help her unload her car.
-
When Carterson got there, Dennis and Hippo were on the roof politely arguing the merits of one placement versus another for the wind turbine. This was between pleasantly debating whether they could improve upon the design of the turbine.
Felicity had long since left. The chief was back in bed, napping. Emma had Janice unhappily under her wing. They were clearing and cleaning an area for a computer station in the bedroom they shared. Or, Emma was. Janice was griping that cleaning wasn't really women's work, but ought to be shared equally between the sexes. Emma had countered that she agreed with the premise, but that it was their turn, considering the men were busy elsewhere. This hadn't worked. Janice had a different definition of sharing, one that was decidedly lopsided in her favor.
Carterson peeked in to see if they were ready for him to install the new system.
"It's not fair we got dust and clutter detail," Janice told him, in lieu of hello.
"I'll come b
ack," Carterson said, and fled.
A few minutes later, Hippo came in, chuckling.
"What's so funny?" Janice demanded.
"Those two young fools outside," Hippo said, wiping tears from his eyes. "They're trying to one-up each other. I guess Uppington's had a taste of being the most able-bodied man on the place, and isn't going to yield his status to Carterson without a fight."
"They shouldn't fight. It's not civilized. Besides, someone might get hurt," Janice said. It came out as a pronouncement.
"I didn't mean physical fighting," Hippo said, amazed that he had to explain that.
"Any type of fighting's bad," Janice said, like she was explaining something to a toddler. "Someone's feelings might get hurt."
"Uh, I thought I'd start work on dinner. That's why I came inside," Hippo said, edging off.
"I'll help," Emma said, heading to wash up.
"Cooking is not necessarily women's work. Men should participate equally, you know," Janice said. This also came out as a pronouncement.
Hippo blinked. "But I am participating," he said.
"Overall, men don't, you know," Janice said, her voice dripping with a sense of injustice.
Hippo gave up, and went to fix dinner.
Janice, left alone, went to another room to watch television. It wasn't as good as using a computer, but she wouldn't have a computer until Carterson stopped being ridiculous and got one installed.
Carterson only needed a few minutes. He left without notifying Janice that the computer was installed, so he wouldn't have to answer for any perceived imperfections. Emma was deputized to see that the computer stayed to specs, and wasn't improved upon by Janice or anyone else prone to meddling.
Janice, oblivious to local activity, settled in to get her fix of news, such as was presented. As usual, except for a natural disaster here and a murder with a particularly gruesome twist there, and a side helping of a spectacular kidnapping, the fare was mostly about government actions and proposed actions, with the occasional dose of citizens who were not following carefully crafted regulations as expected of them.
Janice sat up, as a new thought entered her brain. Once the idea presented itself, it seemed a matter of urgency. She hurriedly went in search of the chief. She found him in his bed, propped up, trying to read despite a haze of pain and wooziness. She asked if he'd cleared things with the local council before authorizing the installation of a wind turbine on the roof.
The chief, who had never considered such a thing, pulled his blanket higher, and assured her that since it was part of a government project it was all right.
"But what if the neighbors object?"
The chief considered telling her that human beings in most places and most times had been able to work things out amongst themselves without the benefit of local councils, and that he was sure the English could resurrect the ability. But he decided he wasn't up to it. "We'll cross that bridge when we come to it," he said.
It was a mistake. Janice distrusted any system that didn't plan ahead in painful detail; it was, apparently, the duty of government to foresee what professional gripers might come up with.
Emma came into the room.
"I don't think we've consulted the local council about putting things on the roof," Janice whined at her. "And he's not worried about the neighbors objecting."
"It's all right," Emma said, with a straight face, "It's all part of the properly-sanctioned move to make the country less dependent on coal and petroleum."
Janice turned to the chief. "Why didn't you say so?"
"I'm not feeling well. I guess I wasn't thinking straight."
Mollified, Janice went to check on the computer installation.
"What happened to the reliably staunch defender of the 'a man's home is his castle' philosophy?" Stolemaker asked.
"She has temporarily gone into a coma from repeated leftist battering," Emma said.
"I'm not far behind you, I think. Has Carterson left?"
"Yes, sir. He set it up so he has twenty ways from Sunday to notice if Janice tries any reprogramming, and I've got the system marked with an inconspicuous hair here, and a piece of tape there, so I can see if she tries anything physically."
"You're not joking, are you?"
"I wish."
"Backing up a bit, I suppose the girl has a point. Neighbors or the council might object to a wind turbine and solar panels springing up without benefit of endless meetings and paperwork beforehand."
"Being veterans of such battles, and favoring pre-emption to being summoned into chambers or tossed pre-mauled to the press, we've tackled that on various fronts, not least of which is a placard Felicity brought that looks official and means nothing. After all, officiousness often does the trick by itself. We also have dirt on local council members, should the need arise. But I don't think it will. We've sliced and diced the regulations in a very lawyerly manner, which ought to convince the locals we know what we're about, even if we don't. Dourlein is prepared to drown them in paperwork, should we decide we need window dressing. But what I came to tell you is that dinner is ready any time you feel up to it."
"It smells good."
"Hippo's one of the best cooks I know," Emma said.
Janice came rushing back into the room. "Is Dennis up on the roof by himself?"
"I haven't any idea where Mr. Uppington is," Stolemaker said.
Emma confessed herself equally ignorant.
"No one should be allowed to be on a roof by himself," Janice said, rushing out the door, knocking Dennis down as he headed to wash up.
-
After dinner, the chief called Emma, Dennis and Janice together so he could detail various jobs they were to tackle from the present field office, such as it was.
Janice took the list and gave herself the jobs she wanted and left the dregs to whomsoever else might take them. She also laid out a schedule detailing when someone might come into 'her' room to work on the computer. The schedule was very much to her advantage, and very much to Dennis's disadvantage. The chief started to protest, but Dennis declared that he didn't mind the arrangements.
When Janice closed herself in 'her' room to work on 'her' jobs on 'her' computer, the chief muttered under his breath about spoilt brats camouflaged as adults. Dennis rose to her defense. "You haven't worked in Orchard's office. The women have to fight for every scrap," he said. It wasn't precisely true; it was only women like Janice who had to fight for every scrap. He realized this as soon as it got out of his mouth. He hesitated, not sure where to head next in this conversation.
"I can't say yea or nay on that," Stolemaker said, "but I expect a highly-trained social scientist to adapt to the conditions at hand. And around here we'd treat her as an equal if she'd only act like an equal instead of the local warlord's daughter. Is that too much to ask?"
Dennis backed off. "How should I know?" he asked. He went to check on the wind turbine.
Not Exactly Allies Page 26